<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?><rss version="2.0" xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/" xmlns:wfw="http://wellformedweb.org/CommentAPI/" xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/" xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom" xmlns:sy="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/syndication/" xmlns:slash="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/slash/" > <channel> <title>self-reflection Archives - Braving Boundaries</title> <atom:link href="https://bravingboundaries.com/tag/self-reflection/feed/" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" /> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/tag/self-reflection/</link> <description>PROFESSIONAL LIFE COACHING & TRAINING</description> <lastBuildDate>Tue, 07 Oct 2025 07:50:12 +0000</lastBuildDate> <language>en-ZA</language> <sy:updatePeriod> hourly </sy:updatePeriod> <sy:updateFrequency> 1 </sy:updateFrequency> <image> <url>https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/Asset-1.svg</url> <title>self-reflection Archives - Braving Boundaries</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/tag/self-reflection/</link> <width>32</width> <height>32</height> </image> <item> <title>Mirror, Mirror: Reflections on ageing (and laughing anyway)</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/mirror-mirror-reflections-on-ageing/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/mirror-mirror-reflections-on-ageing/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Tue, 07 Oct 2025 07:03:51 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Procrastination]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Stress & Anxiety]]></category> <category><![CDATA[ageing]]></category> <category><![CDATA[body confidence]]></category> <category><![CDATA[confidence]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Embracing Change]]></category> <category><![CDATA[friendship]]></category> <category><![CDATA[invisibility]]></category> <category><![CDATA[middle age]]></category> <category><![CDATA[midlife]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mindset]]></category> <category><![CDATA[navigating midlife]]></category> <category><![CDATA[personal empowerment]]></category> <category><![CDATA[personal growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[perspective]]></category> <category><![CDATA[redefining limit]]></category> <category><![CDATA[resilience]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-Acceptance]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-talk]]></category> <category><![CDATA[women and ageing]]></category> <category><![CDATA[yoga]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235362</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mirror-mirror-reflections-on-ageing/">Mirror, Mirror: Reflections on ageing (and laughing anyway)</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_0 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_0"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_0 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_0 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY FRIEDA LEVYCKY, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/" style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;">BRAVING BOUNDARIES</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5> <p><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></p> <p><span>“<em>So, I’m old and weak?</em>” Fabulous! Well, that’s a good start to a Monday!</span></p> <p><span>My friends and I burst out laughing at girls’ night last week as I relayed the story of my yoga instructor helping me stretch further into a pigeon pose than I’d ever managed before. Post class, he gave me some feedback: “<em>Older women …</em>” he started, then quickly corrected himself: “<em>I mean, women who are more mature … need additional weight to progress into positions, as flexibility is just not enough as we get older. Your hips and shoulders are flexible, but weak</em>”. To be fair, his feedback was probably meant to be encouraging. I mean, I am (a bit) older now and I do have weak spots in my body, but all I heard was: <em>old and weak</em>.</span></p> <p><span>So, of course, I went home and did what any reasonable, totally well-balanced woman would do. I studied myself for a good ten minutes in front of the mirror. First my face then, for good measure, the rest of me too. Am I old? Is that how the world sees me now? Inside, I still feel like that flirty little nymph; the young lawyer who tottered around the office in very high heels and a dress. I’m the runner, the traveller, the yoga pretzel, the one who’s never been fussed about make-up. Ever since I was at school, I was always the youngest of the group (an August birthday has its perks). That’s still how I see myself, but is that really how the rest of the world sees me? Or have I quietly, without meaning to, stepped into this “<em>tannie</em>” role (as they say in South Africa)? Not properly old, not exactly young either, but that strange middle space of invisibility.</span></p> <p><span></span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_0"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img fetchpriority="high" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/2.jpg" alt="ageing" title="who is that in the mirror?" class="wp-image-235368" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_1 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong><span>The Invisibility Cloak of Middle Age</span></strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_2 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p style="text-align: left;"><span>A friend of mine told me she knew she’d officially crossed the line when, at 50, the teenage checkout assistant asked if she’d like to use her pensioner discount. “<em>For f**k’s sake!</em>” she laughed, describing how she marched home, dumped the shopping and demanded of her husband and friend: “<em>Do I look like a pensioner?</em>”. There really was only one correct answer to that question and, fortunately, both men were wise enough to choose it.</span></p> <p>Another friend recalled standing in a wine bar bathroom next to a gaggle of 20-somethings on a hen party and catching her reflection beside theirs. The contrast was sobering. Others have shared those silly, but defining, moments when you realise you’ve officially lost track of what “<em>Whip/Nae Nae</em>” is (yes, I did need to look up the spelling for that as I did originally write “<em>Nay Nay</em>”), let alone how to dance to it.</p> <p>To be fair, I can still give them a run for their money if Whigfield or Steps comes on the radio. I’ve always nailed “<em>Saturday Night</em>” and “<em>Tragedy</em>.”<span style="font-weight: 400;"></span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_3 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong><span>The Double-Edged Sword of Invisibility</span></strong></h2> <h2></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_4 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">There’s a strange freedom in becoming invisible though. Fewer eyes watching, fewer judgements, fewer comparisons. However, it can also be lonely. You start to notice the subtle ways the world stops looking your way: the compliments fade, the flirtatious glances vanish and shop assistants suddenly call you “<em>Ma’am</em>”.</span></p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_1 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_1"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/3.jpg" alt="Becoming invisible" title="Becoming invisible" class="wp-image-235369" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_2"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_2 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_5 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span>I used to be judgmental about women who turned to Botox or surgery. I’d make sweeping statements about “<em>ageing gracefully</em>” and “<em>accepting yourself</em>”, but as I inch closer to that stage, I can feel myself softening. I understand now that it’s not always about vanity. Sometimes it’s about visibility. About wanting to feel seen again in a world that treats women’s ageing as something to hide.</span></p> <p>There’s something to be said for doing what makes you feel good in your own skin. Whether that’s fillers or face yoga, Spanx or squats. Seriously, who am I to judge? If it lifts your spirits, then that’s what matters.</p> <p>Clearly, I’ve been talking about ageing a lot because Instagram’s now decided that I’m obsessed. My feed has been flooded with clips from <a href="https://www.instagram.com/reel/DPWk_OAETkK/">Paris Fashion Week</a>: a stunning parade of ageless icons like Helen Mirren, Heidi Klum, Jane Fonda, Gillian Anderson, Iris Berben, Andie MacDowell and Philippine Leroy-Beaulieu drifting effortlessly down the runway, and snippets of Patricia Routledge’s <a href="https://selfdiscoverywisdom.com/2025/08/08/a-poem-by-patricia-routledge/">Letter to Life</a> which she wrote for her 95th birthday. Alongside them, the quote that keeps popping up: “<em>Too young, too old, too bold. Whatever you do, someone will always judge your choices</em>”. How accurate that statement is.</p> <p>It’s almost as if the universe (or the algorithm) is forcing me to re-check my thinking. Some of those women have chosen the surgical route; others have aged naturally and all of them looked magnificent. There really isn’t a single right way to do this ageing thing.</p> <p> </p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_6 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong><span>Old Bird, Strong Body</span></strong></h2></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_3"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_3 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_7 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span>This past week, after all the “old and weak” jokes, I went back to yoga and did a Bikram class. I’ve trained on and off in Bikram for 15 years (I even took my teaching qualifications back in 2017), but this was my first class in months. For anyone who’s ever sweated through those 26 poses in 40 degrees, you’ll know: no class is ever the same. Yet, that class was one of the magical ones; one where everything clicks. My bow-pulling pose was strong, my balance steady and I felt incredible.</p> <p>At the end, a gorgeous, blonde twenty-something bounced over to me and said: “<em>Wow! How long have you been practising? I hope one day I can be just like you</em>”. Now, if that doesn’t make an “old bird” smile, I don’t know what will.</span></p> <p><span></span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_2"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/4.jpg" alt="yoga" title="yoga" class="wp-image-235370" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_4"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_4 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_8 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong><span>Rewriting the Narrative</span></strong></h2></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_5"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_5 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_9 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p>The reality is that I’m new to this ageing thing. I don’t have all the answers and I know damn well that the only way to get them is to walk through this period of my life. What I have started to realise though is that I’ve been joking a lot about ageing lately. I’ve been laughing it off, making quips about “<em>feeling</em> <em>ancient</em>”, but … I’ve also started to notice it (that feeling of being old) and, if I’m not careful, I’ll end up believing my own words too. Negative self-talk rewires the brain and I’m not ready to programme mine to think I’m old and weak.</p> <p>So, I’m changing the script. I’ve set myself a new mantra to stop the negative seeping in:</p> <p><em>“I’m healthy, happy and still a little bit fabulous. This body has seen things, done things, climbed mountains, danced in heels and still gets me through yoga. She’s not old or weak. She’s strong and full of life.”</em></p> <p><em></em></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_3"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/5.jpg" alt="my new ageing mantra" title="my new ageing mantra" class="wp-image-235371" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_6"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_6 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_10 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p>Ageing is a privilege, one that’s easily forgotten until you realise that not everyone is given that gift.</p> <p>So, here’s to all the “<em>old birds</em>” out there, laughing our way through yoga classes, mirror reflections and checkout discounts. May we never forget: <strong><em>we are anything but invisible</em></strong>.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_4"> <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/book-a-call/"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/End-of-blog-post-CTA-image.jpg.webp" alt="" title="" /></span></a> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mirror-mirror-reflections-on-ageing/">Mirror, Mirror: Reflections on ageing (and laughing anyway)</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/mirror-mirror-reflections-on-ageing/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>Who You Were, Who You Are and Who You Are Becoming</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/who-you-were-who-you-are-and-who-you-are-becoming/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/who-you-were-who-you-are-and-who-you-are-becoming/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Thu, 26 Jun 2025 14:32:15 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Change]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Life after Law]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Mid-Life]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Personal Growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Stress & Anxiety]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Authenticity]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Emotional Wellbeing]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Healing]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Identity]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Life Transitions]]></category> <category><![CDATA[personal growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-Acceptance]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-reflection]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235268</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/who-you-were-who-you-are-and-who-you-are-becoming/">Who You Were, Who You Are and Who You Are Becoming</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_1 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_7"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_7 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_11 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;"></span></p> <h2><strong>INTRODUCTION: WHY SELF-REFLECTION MATTERS</strong></h2> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;"></span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I read a quote the other day that said – </span></p> <blockquote> <p><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“A person without self-reflection never changes they just get older.”</span></i></p> </blockquote> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">And it got me thinking. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">About who I am. Who I was. And mostly on who I am still becoming. Because life is a journey. We all know that. A journey with so many twists and turns, bumps in the road, U-turns, and dead ends. Where we thought we would end up is hardly ever the place we foresaw in our daydreaming’s. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But I have said this on more than one occasion –</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> if my younger self could see me now</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">. And I am never quite sure in those moments whether I am saying that in a state of appreciation or disapproval. Perhaps a little of both. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">What I know for sure is that it has taken a lot of work to get to where I am – both work in the real sense, my 9-5 work, but also work on myself, my inner self, to get to a place where I am ok with who and what I am. With who I am becoming. There is so much that can be said for that.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">What it comes down to is constant self-reflection. Looking inward. And that’s so much harder than it sounds. Trust me. Admitting to your own faults and downfalls and areas where you can improve on yourself. Admitting that you’re not “perfect.” Whatever </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">perfect</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> means. Admitting that you are fallible.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But one thing is for certain – I am not the same person I started out as. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">And thank G-d for that. </span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_12 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Who I was: tHE cost of living for others</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_5"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/Tired-Worker-Sleeping-on-Messy-Work-Desk-by-oleksandrbedenyuk.jpg" alt="Tired Worker Sleeping on Messy Work Desk by oleksandrbedenyuk" title="Tired Worker Sleeping on Messy Work Desk by oleksandrbedenyuk" class="wp-image-235294" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_13 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">If we are being honest – and I think we always should be – I was a hot mess. I’m not talking about when I was a teenager because we are all kind of messed up as teenagers. I’m talking about my twenties.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Fresh out of varsity, I had both intellectual and academic arrogance, accompanied by a confidence that comes with looking a certain way – something I put a lot of importance into. I lived under the roof of people I didn’t get along with. Wait, that doesn’t quite cover it. I lived under the roof of people who were and are still the cause of so much trauma and confusion in my life. I was manipulated into believing that family came before my own happiness, that looking after them was more important than looking after myself, that putting their needs before my own basic needs, was my duty and that the only way out of their house was through death or marriage.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">My anxiety was at an all time high. I lived on caffeine and cigarettes, alcohol on weekends just to shake things up. I was a cliché – a work hard, die hard wannabe lawyer working in an environment designed to make you fail – law clerks, at least when I was a law clerk, weren’t expected to excel. They were expected to be downtrodden and exhausted, and I fit the bill perfectly. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">My </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">sunny personality, raucous laugh, dance on the table, shine bright like a diamond, me against the world</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> attitude either rubbed you the wrong way or intrigued you. But it was all a front. An act. A face I put on to fool the onlookers. Inside I was broken. Plagued by not feeling good enough, feeling like I wasn’t pretty or thin enough, feeling like a failure before I had even really begun. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I set myself up to fail. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It didn’t help that my choice of partners at the time either physically abused me or emotionally abused me – </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“have your salad dressing on the side, you don’t want to get fat.”</span></i></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It was a concoction of emotional abuse and guilt at home, emotional abuse at work, emotional abuse from bad choice partners, self-doubt believing I was fat, that I was ugly, that I wasn’t worthy of happiness. It was a lot. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">And I buried it all really deep.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I didn’t seek help. I didn’t think I needed it at the time. All I could focus on was getting out, was starting my life away from everyone, was starting over. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But I would never admit to that aloud. Ever. Talk against my parents? Never. Admit that Articles were not shaping up to be what I had hoped they would be? Never. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">To the world, life was peachy. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But it was a lie. And it took its toll. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Who I was then was a broken person with hopes and dreams, but with no idea of how to make any of them happen. Or belief that any of them could happen.</span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_14 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Who I Am Now: Healing, Growth and Self-Acceptance</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_6"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/Loving-Young-Couple-in-Countryside-by-Jacob-Lund.jpg" alt="Loving Young Couple in Countryside by Jacob Lund" title="Loving Young Couple in Countryside by Jacob Lund" class="wp-image-235292" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_15 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It was when I met my husband that my life changed. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">He saved me in so many ways I can’t fully explain. Who I am now has a lot to do with him. But it has also taken a lot of work by myself on myself. And it has been very hard. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">So much has happened between my early twenties, my thirties and now my forties. I feel like I have run a gauntlet. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">From career changes to failed pregnancies, to almost dying from COVID, to being diagnosed with an autoimmune disease, to my mental health diagnoses. And most importantly to confronting my parents and resorting to “no-contact,” to losing my beloved grandmother, aunt, uncle, and best friend. I have been through a great deal. I have faced and am still facing my traumas, the things I still have nightmares over, the things I have buried deep within me. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But I am facing my so-called demons, my triggers, my pain. I’m controlling my anxiety and am on top of my melancholy. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I am constantly self-reflecting, ensuring that I check in with myself on an ongoing basis – because that’s been so important. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">For the first time, in a long time, I am putting myself first. My needs first. Not in a self-indulgent way. In a healthy way. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But there’s one thing I have noticed about getting older and that is the feeling that life is fleeting. It really is. A year ago, it was 1998! </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">In that realisation comes the understanding that it’s </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">your</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> life. You need to live it for </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">you</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">. Not for anyone else. Do the things that make </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">you</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> happy. Not what makes someone else happy. Because waiting until your deathbed before you fulfil the things on your bucket list is not the way to live your life. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Living my life for </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">me </span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">has meant leaving the legal profession (well not entirely) so that I can write to my heart’s content at </span><a href="https://thelegalbelletrist.com/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">The Legal Belletrist</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">, starting a new venture collecting and trading authentic (imported directly from Japan) vintage and antique Japanese Kimonos at ManeKi NeKo Private Kimono Collection (Kimono’s currently available at Wizards Vintage in Johannesburg), taking pottery classes, writing poetry, starting a novel, spending time with the friends and family I have left, focusing on my health – both physical and mental, giving my cats the love and attention they deserve, travelling as much as my work and budget will allow and spending as much quality time with the amazing man I married as I can. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It has also meant saying goodbye to the people in my life causing me harm. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It’s an ongoing journey. </span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_16 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Who I Am Becoming: Owning My Life and My Future</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_7"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/Kintsugi-Japanese-antique-ceramic-bowl-by-Marco-Montalti-from-Getty-Images.jpg" alt="Taking a pause in nature by gradyreese from Getty Images Signature" title="Kintsugi Japanese antique ceramic bowl by Marco Montalti from Getty Images" class="wp-image-235291" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_17 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I had to go away and really give this one some thought. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Luckily, music is an eternal motivator. While on the treadmill, Linkin Park’s </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“Somewhere I Belong”</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> played over the speakers and the words just seemed to speak to this very topic – </span></p> <blockquote> <p><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"><br /></span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">I wanna let go of the pain I’ve felt so long</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"><br /></span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">(Erase all the pain ’til it’s gone)</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"><br /></span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m close to something real</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"><br /></span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">I wanna find something I’ve wanted all along</span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"><br /></span></i><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Somewhere I belong”</span></i></p> </blockquote> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">They’re not my favourite band by a long margin. So, it struck me as odd that these lyrics would mean so much. But they do. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">And I think that’s who I am becoming – the person who is healed, or who is healing. The person who is able to let go of the pain that was bottled up for so long and finally be at peace. The person who finally feels like her place in the world is where she is happy and safe. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">No drama. No lies. Just peace and being happy in my own skin.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Life is short. It’s unpredictable. And that makes it so very precious. I’ve wasted so much time living my life for others and by others’ rules.</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> It’s now my turn.</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It will take work. I know that. I’ll have to constantly check in with myself to ensure I’m being true to who I am while reaching the goals I constantly set for myself. Self-reflection will be key. On an ongoing basis. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Who I am becoming is a work in progress, but I know one thing for sure – I will be authentically me. Weird, loving and looking forward to growing old, grey and hopefully wiser.</span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_18 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Let’s talk about Self-Reflection!</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_8"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/Taking-a-pause-in-nature-by-gradyreese-from-Getty-Images-Signature.jpg" alt="Taking a pause in nature by gradyreese from Getty Images Signature" title="Taking a pause in nature by gradyreese from Getty Images Signature" class="wp-image-235293" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_19 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Practicing self-reflection takes discipline and intentionality. It requires pressing pause on the chaos of life and simply taking the time to think and ponder about your life. Something often easier said than done. But it’s an incredibly valuable practice.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Without self-reflection, we simply go through life without thinking, moving from one thing to the next without making time to evaluate whether things are really working for us. We don’t pause to think. To analyse. The unfortunate result is that we often get stuck. Like I quoted above – we don’t change we just get older. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Throughout this article I have mentioned how important self-reflection is and how important it has been for me to practice it on an ongoing basis. But I haven’t really stopped to explain how one goes about doing it.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Before you begin with your own self-reflection, I want to say this – it’s important to remind yourself that your time in self-reflection is a safe space within yourself. Don’t judge yourself while you explore your inner thoughts, feelings and motives of behaviour. Simply notice what comes up and accept it. Instead of focusing on fears, worries or regrets, try to look for areas of growth and improvement.</span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_20 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>How to Self-Reflect in 6 Easy Steps</strong></h2></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_8 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_8 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_9"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-1486" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_9 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_21 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Find a quiet, comfortable place where you won’t be disturbed</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – take a notebook or device to record your reflections.</span></p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_9 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_10 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_10"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-1487" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_11 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_22 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Begin with a mindful body scan</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – close your eyes and take a few deep breaths.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;"></span></p> <ul> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">What are you feeling right now?</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Where do you notice these feelings in your body? </span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Note your observations.</span></li> </ul></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_10 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_12 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_11"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_13 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_23 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Identify your inner feelings </p> <p></strong></p> <ul> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">What events, thoughts, or situations might be contributing to these feelings?</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Are these feelings aligned with your values or external pressures?</span></li> </ul></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_11 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_14 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_12"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/4.png" alt="" title="4" class="wp-image-1489" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_15 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_24 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Explore your needs </p> <p></strong></p> <ul> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">What do you need most right now (e.g., rest, connection, adventure, achievement)?</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Are there unmet needs or boundaries you need to address?</span></li> </ul></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_12 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_16 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_13"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/5.png" alt="" title="5" class="wp-image-1490" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_17 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_25 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Consider acting</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – can you take a small step to address your needs or align more closely with your values today? For example:</span></p> <p> </p> <ul> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">If you feel stressed, commit to a short relaxation activity.</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">If you feel disconnected, reach out to someone important to you.</span></li> </ul></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_13 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_18 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_14"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/6.jpg" alt="" title="6" class="wp-image-1491" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_19 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_26 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Review your experience </strong></p> <p><strong> </strong></p> <p><strong></strong></p> <ul> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">How do you feel now compared to when you started?</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">What did you learn about yourself?</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">What can you change to better align yourself with your goals?</span></li> </ul></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_14"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_20 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_27 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Final Thoughts: Coming Home to Who You Really Are</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_28 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 0.06em;">If you need support in figuring out how to self-reflect or what it means to self-reflect or even what the benefits of self-reflection are, get in touch with Frieda Levycky at </span><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/" style="font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 0.06em;">Braving Boundaries</a><span style="font-size: 16px; letter-spacing: 0.06em;"> today. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">For me, self-reflection has meant getting to know myself better. Learning what really matters to me. What I like and what I can live without. Truly. Self-reflection has meant growth. It has meant coming home to who I really am. And loving her regardless.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">And that has been priceless.</span></p> <p><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">(Sources used and to whom we owe thanks: </span></i><a href="https://www.reflection.app/blog/self-reflection-101-what-is-self-reflection-why-is-reflection-important" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Reflection</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">; </span></i><a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/self-reflection-importance-benefits-and-strategies-7500858#toc-how-to-practice-self-reflection" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Very Well Mind</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> and </span></i><a href="https://positivepsychology.com/introspection-self-reflection/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Positive Psychology</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">). </span></i></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_15"> <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/contact-me/"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/End-of-blog-post-CTA-image-4.jpg" alt="End of blog post CTA" title="End of blog post CTA image (4)" class="wp-image-235295" /></span></a> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_divider et_pb_divider_0 et_pb_divider_position_bottom et_pb_space"><div class="et_pb_divider_internal"></div></div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_15 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_21 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_16"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_22 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_29 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p> <p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:[email protected]" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">[email protected]</a> </strong></div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/who-you-were-who-you-are-and-who-you-are-becoming/">Who You Were, Who You Are and Who You Are Becoming</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/who-you-were-who-you-are-and-who-you-are-becoming/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>The Benefits of Being Grateful</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-benefits-of-being-grateful/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-benefits-of-being-grateful/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Thu, 05 Oct 2023 15:49:22 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[work-life balance]]></category> <category><![CDATA[appreciation]]></category> <category><![CDATA[celebrate]]></category> <category><![CDATA[celebrate the small stuff]]></category> <category><![CDATA[communication]]></category> <category><![CDATA[finding gratitude]]></category> <category><![CDATA[grateful]]></category> <category><![CDATA[gratefulness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[gratitude]]></category> <category><![CDATA[honesty]]></category> <category><![CDATA[openness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[thankful]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=5713</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-benefits-of-being-grateful/">The Benefits of Being Grateful</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_2 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_16"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_23 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_30 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></h5> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Thank you. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Two words we say every single day. Almost like we are automated to say the words. Without giving much thought to the words we are saying – </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">thank you for this, thank you for that.</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It’s good manners, thanking people for what they have done or what they have given. Most of us were taught to always show appreciation. Even for the small things. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But is that it?</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">This got me thinking. What does it really mean to be thankful? To be grateful? The words are often used interchangeably. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">If we think about it, </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">to be thankful</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> requires an action by someone else or a positive occurrence around a person in order for them </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">to express gratitude.</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> So, one might say that being grateful is a positive reaction to a positive stimulus.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But that seems rather sterile.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">And it occurred to me – perhaps in order to be grateful, one needs to </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">understand what gratitude is.</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> </span></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_31 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Understanding gratitude</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_17"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/10/The-Benefits-of-Being-Grateful-2.jpg" alt="" title="The Benefits of Being Grateful (2)" class="wp-image-5725" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_32 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><span style="font-weight: 400;">In a quest to understand gratitude, the following definition comes to mind – </span></p> <blockquote><p><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“Gratitude is an emotion similar to appreciation. The American Psychological Association (n.d.) more specifically defines this phenomenon as a sense of happiness and thankfulness in response to a fortunate happenstance or tangible gift.</span></i></p> <p><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Gratitude is both a state and a trait (Jans-Beken et al., 2020). Better explained, one can experience gratitude for someone or something at a certain moment in time, and someone experience gratitude </span></i><a href="https://positivepsychology.com/more-more-more/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">more</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> long-term as a positive character trait” </span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">(</span><a href="https://positivepsychology.com/gratitude-appreciation/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Positive Psychology</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">).</span></p></blockquote> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">In other words – and according to </span><a href="https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-health/gratitude.htm" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Help Guide</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“gratitude involves showing appreciation for the things in life that are meaningful or valuable to you”</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">So perhaps our above assumption was correct – gratitude is a positive response to a positive stimulus. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But there is a little more to it than that. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Psychology professor and gratitude researcher at the University of California Davis </span><a href="https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/profile/robert_emmons"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Robert Emmons</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> (yes, he’s a gratitude scientist) </span><a href="https://youtu.be/pdLRNnrxQAw"><span style="font-weight: 400;">describes gratitude</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> as follows – </span></p> <blockquote><p><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“Gratitude is something we are all familiar with. We have all received gifts from others. We have all received benefits and kindnesses. What is the feeling we have inside when we receive the gift from someone – it is gratefulness. It is the warm feeling of appreciation. We know that we have been the recipient of a benefit and we feel a tendency to want to give back because of the goodness we have received. That’s really what gratefulness is. It’s really just a form of thankfulness”.</span></i></p></blockquote> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Gratitude comes from a feeling of thankfulness, gratefulness and appreciation. </span></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_33 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>How can one practice gratitude?</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_34 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><span style="font-weight: 400;">It’s easy to say thank you for something you have received, but to truly practice gratitude for the small everyday things – like a chat with a friend, a hug from a partner, a kind gesture from a stranger and a cool breeze in the heat of Summer – takes practice. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But it was Jon Kabat-Zinn that said</span><b> – </b></p> <blockquote><p><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“The little things? The little moments? They aren’t little.”</span></i></p></blockquote> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Just like a muscle, practicing gratitude takes conscious effort. And you can do this by practicing these 6 simple exercises – </span></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_17 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_24 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_18"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-1486" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_25 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_35 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong><i>Make gratefulness a part of your morning routine</i></strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – instead of waking up and immediately checking your phone, practice mindfulness first. For at least 30 seconds, start your day off with contemplation. Focus on how lucky you are. Lucky to see the sky, lucky to hear the birds’ chirp. Blessed to be able to experience a new day. Breath in and out on this thought, taking deep, mindful breaths. Focus on how you feel as you contemplate your blessings – however small – in life. Starting your day like this is a great way to remind yourself how big the small things are. How they all contribute to your overall happiness in life. And this thought and feeling will follow you throughout your day. </span></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_18 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_26 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_19"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-1487" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_27 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_36 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong><i>Notice the small things</i></strong><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – </span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">try your best to notice all the small things that happen throughout your day (remembering that they aren’t actually small). Being mindful of the things that happen around you and stretching yourself beyond what is directly in front of you. Open your eyes to more of the world around you. Write small notes on your calendar or in a book you’re reading – wherever – about all the things that you’re thankful for. Notes that you will come across on another day and be able to look back on.</span></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_19 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_28 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_20"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_29 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_37 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong><i>Keep a gratitude journal</i> </strong><span style="font-weight: 400;">– Professor Emmons suggests keeping a </span><a href="https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/ten_ways_to_become_more_grateful1/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">gratitude journal</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">. In this journal you can remind yourself of all the things that bring you joy – getting really specific about what happened to you during your day that brought a smile to your face. Do this on a daily basis, setting aside time to remember moments of gratitude that are associated with everyday ordinary events, personal attributes, or the people around you that enhance your life.</span></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_20 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_30 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_21"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/4.png" alt="" title="4" class="wp-image-1489" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_31 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_38 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong><i>Keep things fresh</i></strong> <span style="font-weight: 400;">– perhaps journaling isn’t for you. That’s ok. Try new and creative ways to express your gratitude. For example, Derrick Carpenter in his article </span><a href="https://www.happify.com/hd/the-science-behind-gratitude/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">The Science Behind Gratitude (and How It Can Change Your Life)</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> suggests keeping a gratitude jar. Any time you experience a poignant moment of gratitude, write it on a piece of paper and put it in a jar. On New Year’s Eve, he suggests (and as is done by his wife), empty the jar and review everything you were grateful for. It’s a simple and eco-friendly way of practising gratitude. Take a look at Frieda’s gratitude jar below.</span></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_21"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_32 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_22"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/10/The-Benefits-of-Being-Grateful-3.jpg" alt="" title="The Benefits of Being Grateful (3)" class="wp-image-5726" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_22 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_33 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_23"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/5.png" alt="" title="5" class="wp-image-1490" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_34 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_39 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong><i>Practice a 5-minute gratitude meditation</i></strong><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – </span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">if you’re able to meditate, find a peaceful, quiet place in your home and tune into your senses. Take deep breaths in and out, focusing your energy on the present moment. Slow everything down by noticing that you can see, hear, touch, smell, and taste. Be grateful for those things. As simple as that. Nothing special needs to be going on in your life in order to practice this meditation. It’s all about the moment and the simple feeling of being grateful for your senses, for your morning coffee, a good book or the kitty on your lap. Explore this simple practice to appreciate all the little things.</span></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_23 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_35 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_24"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/6.jpg" alt="" title="6" class="wp-image-1491" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_36 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_40 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong><i>Share your gratitude</i></strong><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> –</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> we are almost all guilty of taking our loved ones a little bit for granted. Unfortunately. And this can create tension in an otherwise harmonious relationship. So next time you notice a kind act by a loved one, say thank you, give them a hug, buy them a cup of coffee. Do something to make them feel noticed and appreciated. By consciously doing this and making the effort, you naturally strengthen your relationship. And by all accounts that can only be a good thing. </span></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_24"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_37 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_41 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Building any one of the above habits will promote the practice of gratitude. Because what it comes down to is recognising the good moments as they happen. Being grateful for the small things (knowing that they are actually the big things) and expressing this gratefulness outwardly. </span></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_42 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>What are the benefits of practising gratitude?</b></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_25"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/10/The-Benefits-of-Being-Grateful-4.jpg" alt="" title="The Benefits of Being Grateful (4)" class="wp-image-5727" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_43 arrows et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><span style="font-weight: 400;">First and foremost, practising gratitude forces us to shift our thoughts away from negative emotions and instead we focus our attention on positive things that may have been initially overlooked. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">According to </span><a href="https://positivepsychology.com/gratitude-appreciation/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Positive Psychology</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">, practising gratitude is important because it – </span></p> <p> </p> <ul> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">strongly relates to overall wellbeing, including social wellbeing, emotional wellbeing, and psychological wellbeing; and</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">has a domino effect. If a person experiences gratitude, they are more likely to recognise the help and then later reciprocate that help. People who are thanked are presumably more apt to extend help to others in the future.</span></li> </ul></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_44 arrows et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Additionally, and as set out in </span><a href="https://www.mindful.org/an-introduction-to-mindful-gratitude/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Mindful</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> and </span><a href="https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-health/gratitude.htm" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Help Guide</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">, practising gratitude can – </span></p> <p> </p> <ul> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong><i>Relieve stress and pain</i></strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – feeling grateful and recognising help from others creates a more relaxed body state and allows the subsequent benefits of lowered stress. </span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong><i>Improvement in health over time</i></strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – as gratefulness reduces stress, this, in turn, can decrease blood pressure and levels of inflammation. This can give way to better overall cardiovascular health.</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong><i>Alleviate depression</i></strong> <span style="font-weight: 400;">– researcher </span><a href="https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_gratitude_changes_you_and_your_brain" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Prathik Kini </span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">at Indiana University performed a study examining how </span><a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1053811915011532" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">practising gratitude can alter brain function in depressed individuals</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">. Evidence was found that gratitude may induce structural changes in the brain. Such a result reflects how the mental practice of gratitude may even be able to change and re-wire the brain.</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong><i>Better sleep</i></strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – increased gratitude supports higher quality sleep and fewer sleep disturbances. All because our bodies are more relaxed. Also, if you express gratitude right before going to bed, you fall asleep with a more positive outlook.</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong><i>Improved focus</i></strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – if you begin to view the task in front of you in a more positive light, you spend less energy feeling stressed about it. You might even begin to view challenges as opportunities rather than hurdles. </span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong><i>Higher self-esteem</i></strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – viewing the world with a sense of gratitude can change the way you think about your own worth. Especially if you focus on acts by those around you. If your partner takes you out for dinner, they are not only spending money on you but are also spending time with you. This in turn makes you feel appreciated and loved. </span></li> </ul></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_45 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><span style="font-weight: 400;">From the above, it would seem that the positive effects of experiencing and expressing gratitude are endless.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">If you need help with practising gratitude or are not quite sure how to go about doing so, get in touch with Frieda Levycky of</span><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/"><span style="font-weight: 400;"> Braving Boundaries</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> who can help you see the forest for the trees and the light at the end of the tunnel. Or why not<strong> join Frieda and Vee at the <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/workshop">“<span style="text-decoration: underline;">Reflect, Connect & Celebrate” Workshop</span></a> in Cape Town on Saturday, 25 November 2023</strong>? The workshop is all about reflecting on and finding gratitude in 2023. It sounds like a perfect place to start to me! See details below.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">For me, I will be starting a gratitude jar where my first little note says: “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">I’m so grateful I was able to write this article</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">”. </span></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_25"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_38 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_divider et_pb_divider_1 et_pb_divider_position_bottom et_pb_space"><div class="et_pb_divider_internal"></div></div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_26 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_39 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_26"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_40 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_46 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p> <p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:[email protected]" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">[email protected]</a> </strong></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_27"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_41 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_27"> <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/workshop/"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1200" height="628" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/10/BB-Facebook-Ad-Graphics-HORIZONTAL-1.png" alt="" title="BB - Facebook Ad Graphics - HORIZONTAL (1)" class="wp-image-5733" /></span></a> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-benefits-of-being-grateful/">The Benefits of Being Grateful</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-benefits-of-being-grateful/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>The Mid-life Lawyer</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/mid-life-lawyer/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/mid-life-lawyer/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Fri, 15 Sep 2023 10:02:32 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Finding direction and purpose]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Lawyer Life]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Leadership]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Stress & Anxiety]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Work life]]></category> <category><![CDATA[work-life balance]]></category> <category><![CDATA[attorney]]></category> <category><![CDATA[attorney life]]></category> <category><![CDATA[general counsel]]></category> <category><![CDATA[in-house counsel]]></category> <category><![CDATA[inhouse counsel]]></category> <category><![CDATA[law]]></category> <category><![CDATA[lawlife]]></category> <category><![CDATA[lawyer]]></category> <category><![CDATA[lawyer life]]></category> <category><![CDATA[lawyer lifestyle]]></category> <category><![CDATA[lawyerlife]]></category> <category><![CDATA[legal]]></category> <category><![CDATA[legal life]]></category> <category><![CDATA[legallife]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mid-life crisis]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mid-life lawyer]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[senior lawyer]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=5662</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mid-life-lawyer/">The Mid-life Lawyer</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_3 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_28"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_42 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_47 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">When you hear the term “mid-life,” what images or thoughts come to mind? Perhaps it’s the clichéd “mid-life crisis” with visions of a middle-aged man who has just started balding – but he’s growing a ponytail anyway – sporting a “beer-belly” sitting at a table with a lackluster look on his face, scrolling through an online car website searching for a convertible. Something fast and racy. Something flashy – so, probably red. Something to make him feel young again. Or perhaps it’s something else?</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Mid-life might be better understood as a phase marked by escalating stress levels, heightened demands on your time, increased responsibilities that include caring for ageing parents and young children, managing debt, confronting the realities of ageing and dealing with more aches and pains while feeling increasingly fatigued. In essence, mid-life is a stage where you’re inundated from all directions, and self-care seems like a distant memory, with your weekly “cheat meal” becoming the week’s highlight. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Now add being a lawyer into the mix which comes with its own set of stresses and strains: managing a team, developing your practice, adapting to changes in the legal climate, jostling partners and executives, meeting billing targets and getting to grips with legal tech in order to stay up to date and relevant! And there you have it: the “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Mid-Life Lawyer</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">”.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It’s no wonder that there are days when you want to skip town, hop on a plane and head for blue oceans where you can drink </span><a href="https://www.google.com/search?q=if+you+like+pina+colada&sca_esv=563733001&biw=1536&bih=715&tbm=vid&sxsrf=AB5stBjr6QuOoGlnsJDbylQ-6iQGAECk3Q%3A1694182553096&ei=mSz7ZIq2Bbazi-gPpMCRoAs&oq=if+you+like+&gs_lp=Eg1nd3Mtd2l6LXZpZGVvIgxpZiB5b3UgbGlrZSAqAggAMgUQABiABDIFEAAYgAQyBRAAGIAEMgUQABiABDIFEAAYgAQyBRAAGIAEMgUQABiABDIFEAAYgAQyBRAAGIAEMgUQABiABEiWI1AAWMMTcAB4AJABAZgB3QOgAfUgqgEHMi01LjMuNLgBAcgBAPgBAcICBxAAGIoFGEPCAgsQABiABBixAxiDAcICCxAAGIoFGLEDGIMBwgIIEAAYigUYkQLCAggQABiABBixA4gGAQ&sclient=gws-wiz-video#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:1770cbe5,vid:TazHNpt6OTo,st:0" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Pina Coladas</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> and pretend you’re on Spring break.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">All in an effort to feel like you still matter.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">As if that was ever in question. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">As if, in some way, mid-life has erased our fun times. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">As if, somehow, we have given away our youth.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It’s not surprising that you find yourself experiencing a somewhat </span><a href="https://www.google.com/search?q=barbie+trailer+2023&sca_esv=563733001&biw=1536&bih=715&tbm=vid&sxsrf=AB5stBg3tJWltB-enE3bvpNnCqDEyZFXXw%3A1694182518976&ei=diz7ZNqRO-eMi-gPt7iAqA4&oq=barbie+trailer&gs_lp=Eg1nd3Mtd2l6LXZpZGVvIg5iYXJiaWUgdHJhaWxlcioCCAEyCBAAGIoFGJECMggQABiKBRiRAjIFEAAYgAQyBRAAGIAEMgUQABiABDIFEAAYgAQyBRAAGIAEMgUQABiABDIFEAAYgAQyBRAAGIAESLAkUO4DWJcLcAB4AJABApgB3QugAdkvqgELMy0xLjYtMS4zLjG4AQHIAQD4AQHCAgsQABiKBRixAxiRAogGAQ&sclient=gws-wiz-video#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:0a31a67a,vid:Kb7jYOYXiVc,st:0" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Barbie</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">-like existential crisis, asking yourself:</span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_28"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/09/BB-Blog-images-Mid-life-lawyer-1.jpg" alt="" title="BB - Blog images - Mid life lawyer (1)" class="wp-image-5667" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_48 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><ul> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Is this it? </span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Who am I? </span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">What have I done with my life? </span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Do I even like my job?</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Where am I going? </span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">What is life all about? </span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">I need to change. Everything. </span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">I need help. And quickly!</span></li> </ul> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Sound familiar?</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">At this point, you might have contemplated hitting life’s reset button, if one existed. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But pause for a moment and take a deep breath. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Surprisingly, there isn’t much that differentiates “mid-life” from the stereotypical “mid-life crisis.” Psychologists worldwide acknowledge that we all experience “crises” at various stages in our lives. These crises serve as catalysts for essential changes when aspects of our lives no longer align with our internal compass.</span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_49 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Is mid-life really that bad?</strong></h2> <p> </p> <p><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Hey Doc, am I gonna live? </span></i></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">As a mid-life lawyer you will understand that you just have more going on in your life – you have reached a stage in both life and in your career where you have moved through the ranks, you are most likely quite established by now and will – again most likely – have a family, be in a long-term relationship or confidently single. You have more work, more responsibilities both at the office and at home. So much so that you feel like you should be cloned. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It’s no wonder you ask yourself “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">is this it?”. </span></i></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It makes perfect sense that at some point in your life and in your legal career, you are going to get to a point where you are challenged. Where you start to have questions rattling around in your brain – </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">do I still want to be a lawyer? Or do I just want to change my focus area? </span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">And those are good things because it means you are engaging, you are thinking, you are assessing the things that work for you and those that don’t. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It doesn’t mean that you are going to kick in your legal career bucket. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Instead, at this juncture at least, it’s perfectly acceptable if you need to take a moment to look around yourself. If you need to ask yourself some pertinent questions like </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">do I want to carry on with my legal caree</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">r? Or </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Do I just need to learn a new thing or two? </span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">It sometimes takes putting ourselves in uncomfortable situations so that we can address what’s going on around us. And sometimes all we need to do is acknowledge our nagging feelings of “lost youth” and address them head on. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Dealing with your mid-life means recognising that you have a very full life, understanding what your priorities are and acknowledging that mid-life comes with many challenges. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Mid-life </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">isn’t</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> about falling prey to overwhelm, but about making the changes necessary for you to live a happy, fulfilled life. It </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">is</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> about taking our mid-life by the reigns and riding off into the sunset.</span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_50 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The mid-life lawyer event</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_29"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/09/BB-Blog-images-Mid-life-lawyer.jpg" alt="" title="BB - Blog images - Mid life lawyer" class="wp-image-5668" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_51 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The </span><b>“The Mid-life Lawyer” event </b><span style="font-weight: 400;">is for all the lawyers out there who find themselves questioning their relevance, their direction, their priorities, and their goals. It’s for all the lawyers who are looking for more balance in the second half of their careers without feeling like they are </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">giving up </span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">their careers. It’s for all those lawyers who have questions but no answers – yet. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The events will be held in </span><b>Cape Town</b><span style="font-weight: 400;"> on </span><b>Thursday 21</b><b>st</b><b> September</b><span style="font-weight: 400;"> and in </span><b>Johannesburg</b><span style="font-weight: 400;"> on </span><b>Thursday</b> <b>28</b><b>th</b><b> September</b><span style="font-weight: 400;">. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Hosted by Frieda Levyky of Braving Boundaries and Rob Green, the CEO of GRM, it’s sure to be interesting, invoking thought and reflection whilst also being fun. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The event it all about – </span></p> <ul> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">reassessing how you are living your life and where you are focusing the majority of your time;</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">understanding why work has such a tight grip over you;</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">growing and developing your practice and adapting to the new legal world in which we find ourselves;</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">reassessing your relationship with work;</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">helping you remember why you became a lawyer in the first place, and</span></li> <li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">acknowledging what is important in your life and whether or not that is being truly honoured. </span></li> </ul> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It’s a lot to take in but Frieda and Rob promise you will leave the event with a lot to think about – in only the best kind of way.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">If this article has resonated with you and your legal career or perhaps you’re a little at odds with your mid-life, then this event is for you! </span></p> <p><strong>To book tickets to the event, click <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="https://www.howler.co.za/events/the-mid-life-lawyer-1801?utm_source=newsletter&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=join_us_for_the_mid_life_lawyer_event&utm_term=2023-08-22" target="_blank" rel="noopener">here</a></span> for Cape Town and <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="https://www.howler.co.za/events/the-midlife-lawyer-3c60?utm_source=newsletter&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=join_us_for_the_mid_life_lawyer_event&utm_term=2023-08-22" target="_blank" rel="noopener">here</a></span> for Joburg.</strong></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_30"> <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/?page_id=5643"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1200" height="628" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/09/BB-Facebook-Ad-Graphics-HORIZONTAL.png" alt="" title="BB - Facebook Ad Graphics - HORIZONTAL" class="wp-image-5666" /></span></a> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mid-life-lawyer/">The Mid-life Lawyer</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/mid-life-lawyer/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>Creativity: The superpower leading to a happier and healthier life</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/creativity-the-superpower-leading-to-a-happier-and-healthier-life/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/creativity-the-superpower-leading-to-a-happier-and-healthier-life/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Fri, 17 Mar 2023 11:27:37 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Featured]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Finding direction and purpose]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Stress & Anxiety]]></category> <category><![CDATA[work-life balance]]></category> <category><![CDATA[amplified life]]></category> <category><![CDATA[art]]></category> <category><![CDATA[creative]]></category> <category><![CDATA[creative outlet]]></category> <category><![CDATA[creativity]]></category> <category><![CDATA[dance]]></category> <category><![CDATA[depression]]></category> <category><![CDATA[enhance your life]]></category> <category><![CDATA[furniture renovation]]></category> <category><![CDATA[good mental health]]></category> <category><![CDATA[hobbies]]></category> <category><![CDATA[imagination]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mental health matters]]></category> <category><![CDATA[painting]]></category> <category><![CDATA[past times]]></category> <category><![CDATA[perspective]]></category> <category><![CDATA[pottery]]></category> <category><![CDATA[productivity]]></category> <category><![CDATA[reduce overwhelm]]></category> <category><![CDATA[relieve anxiety]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[singing]]></category> <category><![CDATA[stress relief]]></category> <category><![CDATA[work life balance]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=5264</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>If you're seeking to live a happier, healthier and more productive life, then it's time to explore your creativity.</p> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/creativity-the-superpower-leading-to-a-happier-and-healthier-life/">Creativity: The superpower leading to a happier and healthier life</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_4 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_29"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_43 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_52 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></h5> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Before I even start writing this article, it’s imperative for me to turn on some music.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Sometimes it’s Beethoven’s </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Tr0otuiQuU" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Moonlight Sonata</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> (I know kind of sombre) – it’s one of my favourite pieces of music – and on other occasions I need to crank up AC/DC’S </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v2AC41dglnM" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Thunderstruck</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> (because – hell, who doesn’t feel all fired up when this song is cracked up on LOUD?) or listen to the latest Miley Cyrus’s </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7KNmW9a75Y" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Flowers</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> (Shhhh don’t tell anyone. This is, strictly speaking, a Rock ‘n Roll family), just to remind myself to exercise </span><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/self-love/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">self-love, self-respect, and self-care</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">. Thanks Miley!</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Somehow music seems to focus my energy – I know, weird right? It’s as if through the music I can hear and feel the words I put down on paper. Even before I put them on to paper. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It’s something about the creative process for me. It’s an all-encompassing thing – like living and breathing the words through music, through sound and with it – through emotion. It’s like the air I breathe. It’s my motivation. Even when I don’t “feel like it” (yes, that happens. On occasion). </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But then I put on some tunes, and suddenly the words are pouring out of me. Sometimes nonsensical and verbose requiring some hard-handed fine tuning. But it works. For me. It’s my (creative) process.</span></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_31"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Creativity-The-superpower-leading-to-a-happier-and-healthier-life-1-3.jpg" alt="" title="Creativity The superpower leading to a happier and healthier life 1 (3)" class="wp-image-5270" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_53 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>A life without creativity</strong></h2> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I wasn’t always this way. Working as a lawyer, I didn’t think it allowed for creative pursuits. I always felt like I didn’t have the time. And when I did have the time, I was too tired or too fatigued or too (insert emotion here) to be bothered enough to seek a creative pursuit. And the unfortunate thing about this? Perhaps the obvious thing about this…. I always felt like half a person. Not living to my full potential. A massive piece of my </span><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/product/puzzle-box/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">puzzle</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> being completely devoid of anything outside of my small world of law that I had created – a big, empty, colourless hole. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I guess – for me at least – being creative, being a writer (even when my writing is not perfect or doesn’t hit the right “notes” or perhaps finds the wrong readership) is like peering – even a tiny bit – into my soul. I relate – entirely – to </span><a href="https://www.britannica.com/biography/George-Bernard-Shaw" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">George Bernard Shaw</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> when he said – </span></p> <p style="padding-left: 40px;"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“You use a glass mirror to see your face. You use works of art to see your soul”. </span></i></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Being able to “see your soul” through works of the creative process – how magic is </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">that?!</span></i></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Something anyone can do. In my opinion. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">We’re all born with</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> a means to be creativ</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">e, to express ourselves, to standout. And that could be in so many different ways – painting (even badly), writing poetry (even if it sounds childish), drawing (even if it’s a stickman) or applying make-up (even if you look like a clown). </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">We’re all able to be creative. And in that realisation – whole new worlds open up to </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">all of us</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">. </span></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_32"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Creativity-The-superpower-leading-to-a-happier-and-healthier-life-1-2.jpg" alt="" title="Creativity The superpower leading to a happier and healthier life 1 (2)" class="wp-image-5268" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_54 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Creative pursuits assist poor mental health</strong></h2> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Studies show that being creative and having creative pursuits assist with poor mental health.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">In the article </span><a href="https://diversushealth.org/the-mental-health-benefits-of-creativity/#:~:text=How%20Does%20Creativity%20Improve%20Mental,function%20of%20our%20immune%20systems" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">The Mental Health Benefits of Creativity</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">, the following is set out – </span></p> <blockquote><p><em>“Science continues to reveal encouraging evidence about the mental health benefits of creativity. From painting to potting plants, planning parties and beyond, creative activities help us perceive the world in new and different ways. Creativity allows us to create beautiful work, problem-solve, and refresh our bodies and minds. Having fun positively impacts our mental health.</em></p> <p><em>Being creative can increase positive emotions, reduce depressive symptoms and anxiety, and improve the function of our immune systems. The Journal of Positive Psychology supports these findings, stating that “spending time on creative goals during the day is associated with higher activated positive affect.” Positive affect refers to positive moods people experience including joy, happiness, and optimism”.</em></p></blockquote> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I’m sold on this idea that creativity is vital to good mental health. Because when I’m writing, when I’m listening to music, I can feel the words flow through me and I feel completely at peace. I feel centred. I feel happy. And it’s within this state of “flow” when I’m almost in my own world (“in the zone”) that I become mindful of what I’m thinking and feeling and how the writing is adding to my overall happiness for that day. And that feels like a massive accomplishment. It’s a beautiful thing. Almost euphoric. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But there are times when I’m not so happy. There are times when I have undeniable writer’s block. And putting even one word on a page seems almost impossible. In this space I feel stuck. Uncentred, like I – yet again – have a void inside my soul. A feeling I remember from working as a lawyer and having no creative outlet. Whatsoever. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Being creative and having a place to express helps me be productive. It helps me be the best version of myself. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">So, when I’m blocked and cannot write, I must turn to other methods of creative expression in order to push through the bad mojo I find myself in. </span></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_33"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Creativity-The-superpower-leading-to-a-happier-and-healthier-life-1-4.jpg" alt="" title="Creativity The superpower leading to a happier and healthier life 1 (4)" class="wp-image-5272" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_55 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The importance of finding a creative outlet</strong></h2> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Firstly, let’s be honest for a second. It’s not like I’m the next Hemingway. So, this “writer’s” block that I experience is nothing compared to the great writers of our time. I’m not some pseudo artistic savant that has all the answers to all things “creative”. Believe me.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But I do know one thing – tapping into this creative part of my mind (and soul) has opened up so many other parts that I didn’t know existed. Like my penchant for </span><a href="https://www.poetrysoup.com/member_area/my_poems.aspx" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">amateur poetry </span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">and painting. Who knew I could do those things? </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It took a lot of doing </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“a little bit of this and a little bit of that”</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> but I found my happy place. The point is you have to </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">start somewhere</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">. Because if you don’t take your first step, you will always be stuck in exactly the same place. And who wants that?</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">In an article by </span><a href="https://diversushealth.org/the-mental-health-benefits-of-creativity/#:~:text=How%20Does%20Creativity%20Improve%20Mental,function%20of%20our%20immune%20systems" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Diversus Health</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">, they mention –</span></p> <blockquote><p><em>“Practicing creativity is a wellness exercise, similar to having a healthy diet and steady workout routine. Even if we do not think of ourselves as artists or creative innovators, we all have a varying amount of energy, intelligence, and discipline to expand on our ability to express ourselves and be creative.</em></p> <p><em>“The more we practice using our imagination, the better we will be able to express ourselves without the need of verbal language,”</em> says Nguyen. “<em>This also helps us to turn inward amid this noisy world.”</em></p></blockquote> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">To add a little more credence to the statement (and article) above, in a research paper by the University of Tennessee titled </span><a href="https://trace.tennessee.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1137&context=utk_nurspubs" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Creativity in Older Adults: A Plethora of Possibilities</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> by Kenneth D Phillips it’s set out that –</span></p> <blockquote><p><em>“Creativity interventions have been shown to positively affect mental and physiological health indicators. The process of creating and one’s attitude toward life may be more important than the actual product or tangible outcome.”</em></p></blockquote> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">That’s such an important point. </span><b><i>The process of creating is more important than the thing you create.</i></b><span style="font-weight: 400;"> Creating – for creating’s sake – is more beneficial than we know. Whether it’s to ease your anxiety, stress or depression or whether it’s to help open your mind so that you can learn to focus (increasing productivity). The evidence in support of this is overwhelming. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Ok, enough trying to convince you. It’s evident that we need to get creative … and fast! So, let’s get started</span></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_56 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>My creative passions</strong></h2> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It will be a trial by error approach to see what works for you – to find that thing (or maybe number of things) that gets you to your place of zen.</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But create – for the sake of our mental health – we must. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Now before we get into the ways you can do this, let me add – nowadays finding that extra coin to spend on something “pleasurable” seems like a bit of a tall ask. But let me assure you that there are things you can do that won’t cost a solar panel (South African’s will understand this). And there’s so much to choose from – </span></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_30 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_44 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_34"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-1486" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_45 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_57 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong><i>Pick up a paint brush</i></strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – it may sound so pedestrian, but when I paint something, and it turns out even remotely resembling something that could pass as an “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">amateur wannabe arteeest</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">”, I’m immensely proud. I feel like I have done something extraordinary. And once I’ve done that, I kind of feel like I could do anything. I get covered in paint, mess all over the place and absolutely love it! I have the time of my life. I especially like working with acrylic paint – its thick and gooey and feels like it carries substance. I get a lot of my supplies from <a href="https://artsavingsclub.co.za/product-category/paint/acrylic-paints/">Artsavingsclub</a></span><span style="font-weight: 400;">. But you can pick up a bunch of art supplies really cheaply, if you google. If you don’t know where to start, how about looking to YouTube for help. Personally, I love </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/c/surajfinearts" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">SurajFineArts – Abstract ART</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – he posts full tutorials on how to go about doing an abstract painting (my favourite kind). Before you know it, and with absolutely no experience, you come out with something that seems pretty impressive. Just take a look at what I did (some of my first using Suraj’s video tutorials) – </span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_35"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1303" height="713" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Creativity-The-superpower-leading-to-a-happier-and-healthier-life-1-1-1.jpg" alt="" title="Creativity The superpower leading to a happier and healthier life 1 (1)" class="wp-image-5267" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_31 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_46 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_36"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-1487" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_47 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_58 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong><i>Try your hand at pottery </i></strong><i>– </i><span style="font-weight: 400;">there’s nothing like getting your hands well and truly “dirty”. Sticking your hands into the clay and feeling it with each fingertip, getting your senses going. And with a little imagination a ball of clay can become a mug or a platter. I kid you not. I know what you must be thinking – what about a kiln? Sure some clay needs to be fired and glazed but you can also make something just as cool with </span><a href="https://eve-artsupplies.co.za/products/air-drying-clay?variant=34014363156611" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">air drying clay</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">. Air drying clay is best for sculptures or plaques or something else crafty. I decided to make a platter out of air drying clay and then painted it with different layers of chalk paint to create something – not quite useful – but a lot of fun! If you need some help with where to even begin, take a look at </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FtES7Gd5gHE" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Jonthepotter</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – I love his video’s!</span></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_37"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="854" height="194" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Creativity-The-superpower-leading-to-a-happier-and-healthier-life-1-3-1.jpg" alt="" title="Creativity The superpower leading to a happier and healthier life 1 (3)" class="wp-image-5271" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_32 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_48 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_38"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_49 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_59 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong><i>Restore old furniture </i></strong><span style="font-weight: 400;">– you’ll often find me on days off at antique furniture stores or browsing online auctions for old rickety pieces of furniture. To me there is nothing more beautiful than something with a story, something old and worn in with its own past. And I just drool at that. Good quality wood is key. I know it sounds odd, but my grandfather taught me a lot about different types of wood, what partridge wood is good for or camphor wood – what the grains mean. I loved that. So now I rescue furniture (my home is FULL of antiques either inherited or salvaged). I don’t paint every piece of furniture – some things are just too special to paint. But others are just begging for a lick of paint and an adornment or two. I use nails and often wood glue (to my husband’s dismay) to fix things that need fixing, replace door handles or polish them up (especially if they are brass) and then get to the painting part. I use </span><a href="https://www.anniesloan.com/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Annie Sloan Chalk Paint</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> (which has just brought out two new colours – yay). It’s available worldwide! Sloan even has stencils and gilding waxes (which I use a lot). There is a colour for every room (and mood) and even different paints for different surfaces. It’s so much fun adding a slick of paint to your furniture – why buy new when you can fix up something old? I took an armoire from my late grandmother which was not in the best shape and looking terribly drab. She was begging for a makeover. So, I gave her a pretty dramatic one. I used Athenian Black, added embellishments, and then gilded the hell out of it. It’s not to everyone’s taste but she is grand and dramatic. Just like my gran. Watch </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zU3SX_eXpQQ" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Annie Sloan’s tutorials</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> to get you started.</span></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_39"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="376" height="554" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Creativity-The-superpower-leading-to-a-happier-and-healthier-life-1-2-1.jpg" alt="" title="Creativity The superpower leading to a happier and healthier life 1 (2)" class="wp-image-5269" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_33"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_50 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_60 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Ways you can get creative</strong></h2> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Those are some of the things that I have chosen to do – they are my creative outlet. And they won’t all work for you. So, I have included some other suggestions below –</span></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_34 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_51 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_40"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-1486" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_52 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_61 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong><i>Learn to cook</i></strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – I say learn because not everyone is born with this innate ability to produce a meal that gets mouths watering. Also, with the price of food nowadays, it’s something we have all got to learn to do. Sometimes that means using the basic ingredients you have in your pantry. </span><a href="https://www.realsimple.com/food-recipes/recipe-collections-favorites/popular-ingredients/recipes-using-kitchen-staples" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Realsimple</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> has some great easy recipes that you can use with pantry staples (or supposed staples in any event). It’s kind of fun when you throw a couple of things into a pot and somehow miraculously produce an enjoyable meal. In my case, it took a few tries, but it can be done. And it’s fun learning. </span></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_35 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_53 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_41"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-1487" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_54 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_62 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong><i>Try knitting</i></strong><i> – </i><span style="font-weight: 400;">this is not only good for concentration (you </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">have t</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">o focus), but once you get the hang of it, you can knit scarves and sweaters galore! I can’t say that knitting has ever been quite my thing. But I do see the appeal and realise that it is a skill (yes, a skill) that’s both creative and useful too. It’s also super trendy right now. So, grab some knitting needles, get some cheaper yarn, and get knitting. Before you know it, you will be gifting scarves to everyone on their Birthday – saving money and being creative at the same time! Personally, I will be watching </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Egp4NRhlMDg" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">this video</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> to begin with. </span></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_36 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_55 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_42"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_56 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_63 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><i><strong>Gardening</strong> – </i><span style="font-weight: 400;">I truly believe that some people are born with a green thumb and other people are not. But having said that, I love spending time in a garden centre. All the plants and the colours, the scent! It gives me hope. Even if my garden doesn’t quite resemble anything hopeful. But I do believe that you can learn, and you can propagate plants that you already have (again saving money) – to start to design your own garden, even if it’s a small garden, and make it a happy one. You can start learning how by watching </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ILDnpeCELeY"><span style="font-weight: 400;">this tutorial</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">.</span></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_37 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_57 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_43"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_58 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_64 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><i><strong>Make your own board game</strong> –</i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> it has been said that Frieda knows a thing or two about making her own board game. I kid you not. I read about it in this </span><a href="https://scoutlife.org/hobbies-projects/projects/172763/how-to-make-your-own-board-game/">article</a> <span style="font-weight: 400;">and thought – “sure I can do that” but to my dismay failed dismally. It just wasn’t fun enough (the level of “enough” is a personal choice). But if you’re short on funds and want to make something fun for you and your partner and/or family to do – then this is it. This is Frieda’s family during Christmas 2008 tackling the “Family Quiz” – 300 questions about her family and the shenanigans that they had individually and collectively got up to! I’ve no doubt a lot of fun was had by all!</span></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_44"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="604" height="452" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Creativity-The-superpower-leading-to-a-happier-and-healthier-life-1-1.jpg" alt="" title="Creativity The superpower leading to a happier and healthier life 1 (1)" class="wp-image-5266" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_38"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_59 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_65 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">If none of the above is quite your thing, there’s still </span><a href="https://www.plymouth.ac.uk/research/education/university-practice-partnerships/learning-across-the-curriculum/art-resources/pebble-painting" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">pebble painting</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> (and this involves going out in search of the perfect pebble and only then painting something that reminds you of the walk). It’s a “whole thing”. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Lastly, if you’re a </span><a href="https://www.flyfishersinternational.org/Learn/Learning-Center-Resources/Fly-Tying/Beginner-Fly-Tying-Manual?gclid=Cj0KCQjw2cWgBhDYARIsALggUhr_h_GRxucvZ2nySDNPW3L3P_mJorIZHj32c_SJHu-NuSrOdkoGhgAaAiW0EALw_wcB" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">fly-fisherman</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> (I’m what’s known as a “fishing widow”) and you are dead keen on the perfect fly, then learning to tie one could be your thing. There’s so much here I wouldn’t even know where to begin. But when you have famous friends (and mentors) like </span><a href="https://www.thefloatingfly.com/peter-brigg" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Peter Brigg</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> and </span><a href="http://www.tomsutcliffe.co.za/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Tom Sutcliffe</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">,</span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> my husband has learnt a thing or two about fly fishing and fly tying. And if anything, it keeps him out of trouble and has taught him colours like chartreuse (</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">”if it aint chartreuse it aint no use” </span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">apparently). In all honesty (and don’t tell him I said this but…), it brings him peace and makes him far more amenable to shoe shopping. It’s a really healthy, happy pursuit. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The point is – there are so many creative “things” out there to try! </span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">So, find your place of happiness, your thing of peace and then embrace it. Break away from your everyday routine, indulge in fun activities – create art, sing (even if it’s really badly), dance (“like no one’s watching”) and play (let your inner child free). </span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">Not only will it make you feel good, but it’ll give you renewed hope, a renewed sense of self and will revitalise you. Because one thing’s for sure, whether you are painting, doing pottery, restoring furniture, writing poetry, making a board game, painting a pebble or even tying a fly – you’re not thinking about your worries or stressing about tomorrow. You’re focused on the here and now and are hopefully bringing yourself inner peace and happiness. </span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Mental health in good shape? Check!</span></p> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I think this quote may be the best motivator for being creative there is – </span></p> <blockquote> <p>“A creative life is an amplified life. It’s a bigger life, a happier life, an expanded life, and a hell of a lot more interesting life”<b> –</b><span style="font-weight: 400;"> Elizabeth Gilbert</span></p> </blockquote> <p><span style="font-weight: 400;">If you really have no clue where to begin or what to do, why not join Frieda’s </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Creative Breakfast for Women</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – and put this article into practice! </span><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/newsletter-sign-up/"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Sign up for the Braving Boundaries Newsletter</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> to find out more or contact Frieda Levycky </span><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/contact-me/"><span style="font-weight: 400;">here</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">.</span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_divider et_pb_divider_2 et_pb_divider_position_bottom et_pb_space"><div class="et_pb_divider_internal"></div></div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_39 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_60 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_45"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_61 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_66 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p>About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong></p> <p>Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p> <p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>.</p> <p><strong>Email: <a href="mailto:[email protected]" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">[email protected]</a> </strong></p></div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/creativity-the-superpower-leading-to-a-happier-and-healthier-life/">Creativity: The superpower leading to a happier and healthier life</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/creativity-the-superpower-leading-to-a-happier-and-healthier-life/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>New Year’s Resolutions with a twist (Part 2)</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-2/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-2/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Thu, 16 Dec 2021 23:01:00 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Celebrations & Festivities]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Finding direction and purpose]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[2022]]></category> <category><![CDATA[be kind]]></category> <category><![CDATA[big picture]]></category> <category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category> <category><![CDATA[celebrate the small stuff]]></category> <category><![CDATA[celebrations]]></category> <category><![CDATA[connection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[creativity]]></category> <category><![CDATA[direction]]></category> <category><![CDATA[end of year]]></category> <category><![CDATA[enneagram assessment]]></category> <category><![CDATA[harmony]]></category> <category><![CDATA[IEQ9]]></category> <category><![CDATA[keep on track]]></category> <category><![CDATA[kindness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[life goals]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mantra]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mindset]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mindset matters]]></category> <category><![CDATA[motivate me]]></category> <category><![CDATA[motivation]]></category> <category><![CDATA[new beginnings]]></category> <category><![CDATA[new year]]></category> <category><![CDATA[new year's resolution]]></category> <category><![CDATA[optimism]]></category> <category><![CDATA[overcoming overwhelm]]></category> <category><![CDATA[positivity]]></category> <category><![CDATA[reconnect]]></category> <category><![CDATA[reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[starting anew]]></category> <category><![CDATA[stay on track]]></category> <category><![CDATA[word for the year]]></category> <category><![CDATA[word of the year]]></category> <category><![CDATA[year goals]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=3715</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>Keeping your New Year's Resolutions on track. How do you give yourself the best chance at implementing and achieving the changes you desire?</p> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-2/">New Year’s Resolutions with a twist (Part 2)</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[ <h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>By Frieda Levycky of Braving Boundaries and Alicia Koch of The Legal Belletrist</em></strong></h4> <p>So, how are you holding up at the end of 2021? If you’re anything like us, the end of year can’t come soon enough. After two years of uncertainty – of changed plans, obscure regulations and waves of highs and lows (and not just in the pandemic sense) – we are well and truly in need of a proper break. A time to reflect, relax and re-connect with ourselves and our loved ones.</p> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/9-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3759"/></figure> <p>In part 1 of this Article, we spoke about taking a kinder (rather than resolute) approach to making New Year’s Resolutions in 2022. Instead of having a long list of things to accomplish, we encouraged you to identify one word that could be your guiding light for the year.</p> <p>Did you have a chance to consider the word that encapsulates the changes you want to make in 2022? Ali and I managed to choose ours and here are our reasons why.</p> <div style="height:30px" aria-hidden="true" class="wp-block-spacer"></div> <h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>New Year’s Resolution: RE-CONNECT (Frieda’s word)</strong></h2> <p>For me, 2022 is going to be all about re-connection. As a natural extrovert – someone who is always connecting, socialising, involving and organising – I never imagined being someone who would struggle with connection. However, having easily adapted to working from home and the inevitable reduced in-person interaction in 2020/21, I’ve stopped flexing my “connection muscle”. And, frankly, the thought of group activities, live trainings, networking events and easily reaching out to people one-on-one to connect, has started to cause some feelings of overwhelm and anxiety. The irony is that I coach around this and know everything that I need to do to move through these feelings and fears. The reality is though that, at times, we all fall off track – even coaches – it’s just part of being human.</p> <p>So, rather than beating myself up for not making more of an effort to connect in 2021, 2022 is going to be a kinder reintegration into connection again: connection with my family in the UK and Ireland, connection with my existing clients and potential clients, connection with my followers, connection with my industry and connection with myself. That muscle will get re-built, I just need to take the necessary steps to bring about that change. </p> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/10-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3760"/></figure> <div style="height:30px" aria-hidden="true" class="wp-block-spacer"></div> <h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>New Year’s Resolution: HARMONY (Alicia’s word)</strong></h2> <p>The word harmony, to me at least, evokes feelings of balance and flow within all the different areas and facets of our lives, and is something I have personally lacked the last couple of years (being an ex-lawyer it is not entirely hard to understand why). Whether it has been changes in my career, challenges with health or disconnection with family (or friends), I have felt my life lacking harmony and balance. I have, often times, felt lost at sea without a life jacket flailing around the waves in panic. When one part of my life has improved, another has suffered. And because of that, I have not felt completely present nor completely at ease. </p> <p>The beginning of COVID (and start of lockdown) in 2020 marked an enormous change in my life – both professionally and most certainly personally. And whilst lockdown regretfully had negative ripple effects globally, I found myself slowly coming into my own. I had finally found what I loved to do – write – and have successfully made a career out of it. But my health suffered. When my health improved, I found that my personal relationships were negatively affected. It has (very much) been a give and take situation with the important things unfortunately not weighing equally. </p> <p>Whilst I don’t (yet) have all the answers to how I am practically going to find harmony and balance in my life, I know that it will be the small steps I take every day (keeping my word of the year in mind), that will ultimately improve my life. I will need to make focused, conscious decisions and take deliberate actions, knowing (now) that I need to handle myself with care and kindness. Something we do for others but not always for ourselves. </p> <p>I am so looking forward to 2022 which I know will be more balanced and more harmonious not only because I will it so, but because I will take the necessary actions to ensure the outcome I have envisaged for myself. Slowly and gently… </p> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/11-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3761"/></figure> <div style="height:30px" aria-hidden="true" class="wp-block-spacer"></div> <h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>Helping you to keep your New Year’s Resolution on track</strong></h2> <p>As we said in the <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-1/">previous article</a>, choosing your word is the first step. But how do you give yourself the best chance at implementing that word throughout 2022 and achieving the changes you desire?</p> <p>Here are a few ideas:</p> <h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Positive Self -Reflection</em></strong></h4> <p>Once you have chosen your word for the year, think about the areas in your life you would like to improve. This will help you to reflect not only on your past but your present and future as well. What has been working in your favour and what would you like to change? In order to set an achievable goal, you need to have a better sense of where you have been, as well as the direction you are moving towards. It’s also important to acknowledge your most recent accomplishments. When immersed in the hustle and bustle of everyday life, we often forget to reflect on our achievements. Perhaps you have already made positive changes throughout the year without giving these accomplishments much thought. Do that now and ensure you acknowledge what you have achieved.</p> <h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Develop critical self-awareness </em></strong></h4> <p>Living without self-awareness is like driving your car at night without brakes. Technically, you can still drive, but you will eventually lose control, be unable to stop and have a collision. With self-awareness, you shed light on your destructive, reflexive habits. And by doing so, you are able to eliminate self-sabotaging behaviour. So be aware of them. If you’re interested in finding out more about your motivations, blind spots and defence mechanisms, take a look at <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/enneagram/">the Enneagram</a>.</p> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/12-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3762"/></figure> <h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Make your goal possible</em></strong></h4> <p>Make the actions around your word something you will enjoy. For example, choosing “Health” as your word for the year will involve many different actions like becoming more active and eating healthier. But don’t undertake exercises that will make you feel miserable. Don’t put a bowl of fruit on your kitchen counter filled with fruit you don’t like or commit to running a marathon if you hate running. Be conscious about the actions you take to honour your word for the year in a way that ultimately makes you happy. </p> <h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Celebrate the small stuff</em></strong></h4> <p>The trick is not to become overwhelmed before you get going. Decide the type of person you want to be – A healthy person? A strong person? A writer? A musician? Then prove it to yourself with small wins over time. Start small and begin with acknowledging all of your small successes on a daily basis. </p> <p>Start by taking a look at habits that may be holding you back. Find one that is simple and easy to achieve. For example drinking a glass of water every time you are at your kitchen sink. It may not be often but every time you are there you have one glass of water. This will contribute to your overall wellness and health/fitness. It is also not impossible to do. Find small, simple challenges that you can easily make happen and do them. It will feel so good as well.</p> <h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Get creative about it</em></strong></h4> <p>How can you motivate yourself to stay on track? It is often the visual things that keep us optimistic. So why not get creative with it? Why not create a piece of art (in whatever medium feels good to you) to hang in your home or your office that visually captures your word of the year. Have a little fun with it and focus your energy on that word entirely as you get creative. </p> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/13-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3763"/></figure> <h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Define what your word means to you</em></strong></h4> <p>One simple word can capture limitless inspiration and many meaningful feelings. Your own personal definition of what that word means to you will go far beyond what the dictionary has to say about it and will be more meaningful because it is from your own unique perspective. So think about this hard and write it down somewhere that you can refer to when you feel that you have lost your way. </p> <h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Use your word as a mantra </em></strong></h4> <p>Whether or not you create an affirmation, prayer, statement, or something else that works for you, use your single word as a mantra throughout each day. See it in your mind’s eye by creating a mental image that captures its meaning and repeat it to yourself every day. Believe in it and know that it is achievable. </p> <h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Cultivate optimism </em></strong></h4> <p>No one’s life is positive all the time. But the important thing here is to train yourself to focus on the positives and only briefly acknowledge the negatives. Don’t let insecurity prevent you from having a positive outlook. Realise it’s a choice.</p> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/14-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3764"/></figure> <h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Let go of the typical “resolution” mentality</em></strong></h4> <p>The word of the year process is meant to be a gentle one. But the important thing here is not to confuse gentle with weak. A word for the year is a powerful practice. It is far more effective to focus on a word like “health” than to command yourself to get to the gym or to only eat X number of calories a day. As you inspire yourself towards overall good health, it is likely that you will find yourself achieving good health as a byproduct of simply having an overall healthier mindset. So, make sure that your word feels good to you, not pushy, demanding or unachievable.</p> <h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Don’t sweat the bad days (small stuff)</em></strong></h4> <p>Just because you have your word for the year and are taking baby steps to achieve your overall goal every day, good habits are extremely hard to develop. And they are really easy to break. Remember change is never easy – for anyone. </p> <p>Perfection is impossible. There will be days when you slip and fall, graze a knee or take a tumble. There will be times when you won’t be able to do what you planned to do. But know that it’s okay – accept it, own it, and then get back on the new habit horse.</p> <p>What matters most here is your long term goals. While you might occasionally fail, see a setback as just a setback – not a reason to give up. </p> <h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Remember the Big Picture</em></strong></h2> <p>Although change is difficult, what’s most important is developing <em>the kind of habits that allow you to achieve that change</em>. Your mindset is crucial in ensuring that your word of the year is honoured in a way that <em>motivates you, encourages you and fulfills you. </em> </p> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/15-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3765"/></figure> <p>Don’t just wish and hope that all will be well. Take attainable steps that will ensure success. And keep your mind focused on the achievement of the overall bigger picture. A small misstep today should not mark the end of “word”. </p> <p>While there are, no doubt, still resolution-makers in our midst, we feel it is prudent practice (at least at this point in time) to be kind to ourselves. Whether you’re defining your New Year’s resolutions, choosing your one word to define the whole year, or are choosing to decline the tradition altogether, try your best to maintain positive outlooks and motivation. </p> <p><em>“Past and Present I know well, each is a friend and sometimes an enemy to me. But it is the quiet, beckoning Future, an absolute stranger, with whom I have fallen madly in love.” – </em>Richelle E. Goodrich</p> <p>So, embrace the beckoning future and fall madly in love with it – whether you make resolutions or choose a word of the year, make it your own. Be kind, be gentle, have grace and fall in love with the opportunities that lie ahead of you. </p> <p>From all of us at <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/">Braving Boundaries</a>, we wish you a Happy, Healthy Festive Season and all the best for 2022. </p> <p>Frieda & Ali x</p> <div style="height:30px" aria-hidden="true" class="wp-block-spacer"></div> <figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/book-a-call/"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/End-of-blog-post-CTA-image.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3291"/></a></figure> <div style="height:30px" aria-hidden="true" class="wp-block-spacer"></div> <div class="wp-block-columns is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-1 wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex"> <div class="wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow" style="flex-basis:15%"> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist-1024x1024-1.jpg" alt=""/></figure> </div> <div class="wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow" style="flex-basis:85%"> <p>About the writer, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong></p> <p>Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism. </p> <p>Click here to visit <a href="https://www.thelegalbelletrist.com/">The Legal Belletrist website</a>.</p> <p><strong>Email: <a href="mailto:[email protected]" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">[email protected]</a> </strong></p> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-2/">New Year’s Resolutions with a twist (Part 2)</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-2/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>New Year’s Resolutions with a twist (Part 1)</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-1/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-1/#comments</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Wed, 15 Dec 2021 15:23:05 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Celebrations & Festivities]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Finding direction and purpose]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Uncategorised]]></category> <category><![CDATA[2022]]></category> <category><![CDATA[be kind]]></category> <category><![CDATA[be kind to yourself]]></category> <category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category> <category><![CDATA[chnage]]></category> <category><![CDATA[creating change]]></category> <category><![CDATA[feeling inspired]]></category> <category><![CDATA[goal setting]]></category> <category><![CDATA[kindness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[melinda gates]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mindset]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mindset matters]]></category> <category><![CDATA[motivation]]></category> <category><![CDATA[new beginnings]]></category> <category><![CDATA[new year]]></category> <category><![CDATA[new year's resolution]]></category> <category><![CDATA[resolution]]></category> <category><![CDATA[resolutions]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[word for the year]]></category> <category><![CDATA[word of the year]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=3712</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>As 2022 draws nearer, let's take a fresh look at our approach to New Year's Resolutions. How can we be kinder to ourselves this year?</p> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-1/">New Year’s Resolutions with a twist (Part 1)</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[ <h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>By Frieda Levycky of Braving Boundaries and Alicia Koch of <a href="https://www.thelegalbelletrist.com/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">The Legal Belletrist</a></em></strong></h4> <div style="height:30px" aria-hidden="true" class="wp-block-spacer"></div> <h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>New Year’s Resolutions – they are very resolute aren’t they?</em></strong></h2> <p>It’s that time of year again – Christmas turkeys have been ordered and champagne is chilling in the fridge. All in preparation for a festive time of the year – boasting promises of hope for the future. </p> <p>With that, social media is abuzz with positive images and quotes, everything to help gear you towards “achieving your goals” and tackling 2022 with optimism and positivity. </p> <p>Meme after meme motivating us to become better versions of ourselves. <em>As if we are not good enough already</em>. It can get overwhelming. Especially when there is still so much on our plates – a new COVID variant – <a href="https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/variants/omicron-variant.html" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Omicron</a>, <a href="https://www.news24.com/health24/medical/infectious-diseases/coronavirus/covid-19-booster-doses-who-needs-them-and-are-they-safe-and-effective-20211213-2" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">booster vaccines</a> and <a href="https://www.za.kayak.com/travel-restrictions" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">travel restrictions</a> – again. To name but a few. </p> <p>But historically, and as many of us will admit, this is also the time for New Year’s Resolutions. Aaaah, the promises we make to ourselves – <em>to lose weight, to get fit and to find a job that makes us happy.</em> They all sound fantastic in our own heads, especially as we devise plans on how to make them happen. Complex and intricate details around step-by-step improvements that we promise to implement come Day One of the New Year. But are they always realistic? </p> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/2-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3747"/></figure> <p>Either way, they do serve to make us feel better as we indulge in a chocolate or two, have a second helping of Christmas lunch or simply lay on the couch binging Netflix. It calms us down as we reflect on our holiday excess and it gives us a sense of hope that this excess can all be forgotten about and done away with. This sort of “buyer’s remorse” for holidays, propels us to make the wild promises to ourselves to “get into shape” as we unwrap a Jaffa cake and turn on the telly. </p> <p>We have abandoned our restraint (and all reason) but dispel our fears of complete ruin by setting goals to start our new year afresh and completely motivated. We are on holiday after all and excuses to “let go” come easily (and aplenty). </p> <p>It’s not a bad thing to let go, of course. A little R&R is most certainly needed (particularly after the last two years). But it is the promises around the R&R that are important. </p> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/3-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3748"/></figure> <div style="height:30px" aria-hidden="true" class="wp-block-spacer"></div> <h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>A New Year, a New You?</strong></h2> <p>It seems like a viscous cycle. Come 1st January – after a night full of <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=acxnmaVTlZA" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"><em>“Auld Lang Syne</em></a>”, champagne corks popping and heads aching – gym, yoga or pilates memberships increase at a rapid rate, diets are hastily undertaken and more positive memes are posted on social media. <em>“Out with the old and in with the new”</em> seems to be the general motto with an overall sense of self-improvement (and possible enlightenment) a flurry. </p> <p>It’s like we all wake up at the start of the new year thinking it will be easy as pie to turn over a new leaf and change everything about ourselves. Cabbage soup diets commence. Carbs and wine become unspoken terms. 5am alarms spur us into action for early morning park runs. And those size 8 jeans that have been embarrassingly hidden in the back of our closets for the last ten years, once again, remerge with the allure of: “You can do this”. And there we find ourselves, starting the New Year determined and brimming with self-belief. </p> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/4-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3750"/></figure> <p>Inevitably, however (and if the <a href="https://www.inc.com/jeff-haden/a-study-of-800-million-activities-predicts-most-new-years-resolutions-will-be-abandoned-on-january-19-how-you-cancreate-new-habits-that-actually-stick.html" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">surveys</a> are anything to go by), as we settle into the new ebb and flow that is a new year, we become accustomed to a new rhythm and that does not always go hand-in-hand or in sync with the goals we have set for ourselves. All of a sudden, come <a href="https://www.thereisadayforthat.com/holidays/various/quitters-day" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">“Quitters Day”</a> (aka 19 January), our resolutions and what we sought to achieve often seem too far out of reach and are thus abandoned unfulfilled and seemingly meaningless. </p> <p>This, in turn, leaves us feeling disappointed and disheartened. Like a failure before we’ve even really begun. A recipe for disaster and certainly no good for our self-esteem. We find ourselves in front of the mirror asking:</p> <p><em>“Why is it that with every good intention, I am unable to get fit, lose weight, save more money or find that so-called “happy job”? </em>(the apparently most highly ranked New Year’s resolutions according to <a href="https://www.statista.com/statistics/378105/new-years-resolution/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Statista</a>). <em>Why does improving my life seem so elusive?”</em></p> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/5-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3752"/></figure> <div style="height:30px" aria-hidden="true" class="wp-block-spacer"></div> <h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>It’s not the resolution, it’s you</strong></h2> <p>Perhaps it’s the word “resolution” that instills fear of under-achievement in all of us. It is a very intimidating, demanding word – the finality and seriousness of it. It’s like something you “must do”, “have to do” – with seemingly no room for failure.</p> <p>According to the Oxford English Dictionary, a Resolution means – </p> <p><em>“a firm decision to do or not to do something”.</em></p> <p>It’s the <em>firm decision</em> part that has a way of doing us all in. </p> <p>But you see, it’s not the resolution itself that is doomed to fail, like dieting or exercising. It’s your mindset that encourages you to “change” that is most likely at fault. In order to succeed with a goal, you need to change the way you think in order to sustain the motivation to succeed. Unless you change your mindset, your health goals or financial goals will not magically materialise. You need to put in the mental effort first. </p> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/6-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3753"/></figure> <p><strong><em>Change in and of itself is a scary concept.</em></strong><strong> </strong>It involves, at least to a certain degree, a certain amount of emotional strain which in turn can lead to stress, overall discomfort, anxiety, feelings of failure and sometimes depression. Change is not easy for anyone. And that difficulty can lead to a degree of self-sabotage. </p> <p>So, the next logical question is this – <strong><em>how do we change this “setting yourself up to fail” cycle?</em></strong></p> <div style="height:30px" aria-hidden="true" class="wp-block-spacer"></div> <h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>New Year’s Resolutions with a twist</strong></h2> <p>Take Melinda Gates as an example. Melinda does not make New Year’s resolutions. While she does resolve to change, instead of having a list of “resolutions”, she chooses <a href="https://www.cnbc.com/2019/01/02/melinda-gates-doesnt-make-new-years-resolutions-heres-what-she-does-instead.html" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">a single word</a> to bring her guidance and clarity. She has said that the power of a well-chosen (and focused) word makes the year better, gives her clarity on what she wants to achieve and helps her to focus on an overall (and often continuing) goal. It is a gentler approach and alternative to a long list of resolutions which encourages growth and optimism despite setbacks. </p> <p>As we look back on the last two years, we realise that having a long list of resolutions that are perhaps unattainable (simply because the world is so full of uncertainty at the moment) is <a href="https://www.dispatch.com/story/lifestyle/health-fitness/2021/01/01/experts-say-go-easy-2021-new-years-resolutions-theyre-ok-even-skip/6539824002/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">not necessarily the kindest thing to do to ourselves</a>. Instead, we believe we need to dig a little deeper and find something that encapsulates everything we want to achieve and then take small, daily steps to get closer to that goal. </p> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/7-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3754"/></figure> <div style="height:30px" aria-hidden="true" class="wp-block-spacer"></div> <h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>A different approach for 2022</strong></h2> <p>This New Year we believe it is ok to take it a little easier on yourself. Rather than creating a long list of things to accomplish, we encourage you to: </p> <ol class="wp-block-list"><li><strong>Identify the changes you want to make</strong> in 2022 and how those changes will benefit your life as a whole. </li><li>Then <strong>choose one word</strong> that fully encapsulates the changes you want to make in 2022. Let that be the word that becomes your guiding light for the year.</li></ol> <p>Finding your word is just the start. But it’s the beginning of a journey that will gently get you to where you want (and need) to be. </p> <p>Take a read of Part 2 of this Article to gain some insight into how you can turn that one word into a year’s worth of action. Released on Friday, 17 December 2021.</p> <div style="height:30px" aria-hidden="true" class="wp-block-spacer"></div> <figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/book-a-call/"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/End-of-blog-post-CTA-image.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3291"/></a></figure> <div style="height:30px" aria-hidden="true" class="wp-block-spacer"></div> <hr class="wp-block-separator has-text-color has-background" style="background-color:#c69229;color:#c69229"/> <div style="height:30px" aria-hidden="true" class="wp-block-spacer"></div> <div class="wp-block-columns is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-2 wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex"> <div class="wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow" style="flex-basis:15%"> <figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist-1024x1024-1.jpg" alt=""/></figure> </div> <div class="wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow" style="flex-basis:85%"> <p>About the writer, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong></p> <p>Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism. </p> <p>Click here to visit <a href="https://www.thelegalbelletrist.com/">The Legal Belletrist website</a>.</p> <p><strong>Email: <a href="mailto:[email protected]" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">[email protected]</a> </strong></p> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-1/">New Year’s Resolutions with a twist (Part 1)</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-1/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>1</slash:comments> </item> </channel> </rss>