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<title>When life feels out of control: 5 ways to find your anchor</title>
<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/when-life-feels-out-of-control/</link>
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<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
<pubDate>Wed, 26 Feb 2025 06:17:07 +0000</pubDate>
<category><![CDATA[Anxiety]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[Change]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[Stress & Anxiety]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[work-life balance]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[anxiety]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[depression]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[Finding Your Anchor]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[Life Advice]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[life balance]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[Mindfulness]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[Personal development]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[resilience]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[self care]]></category>
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<description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/when-life-feels-out-of-control/">When life feels out of control: 5 ways to find your anchor</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5>
<p><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Catching up with an old friend the other day we were both struck with how off kilter our lives seemed to be. She lives thousands of miles away in one of the coldest cities on earth and I live in sunny South Africa, where I have lived all my life. I know, nothing to write home about. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">And yet, our lives have both taken such drastic turns. Mine with fighting constant pain as well as my mental health struggles and her with her own mental health struggles and the constant battle to keep her and her husbands’ head above water. It’s enough to send anyone diving under the covers seeking refuge from the world. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The thing that struck us is the fact that despite living two very different lives, growing up quite differently, having different careers and very different personalities, our struggles didn’t seem very different. We both struggle with anxiety and depression – the two going so nicely hand-in-hand – and are both feeling very untethered from the world. Both needing an anchor – her in the snow and me in the sun.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It’s funny how catchups can sometimes turn into revelations. Especially with old friends. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">And that got me thinking. If two friends on literal opposite ends of the world are feeling exactly the same, surely more people are feeling less tethered to the world than they would like. I mean the world as we know it is so inundated with expectations. We’re constantly – whether this is through social media, advertising or even well-meaning advice from friends and family – to “be” this or “do” that, that the pressure to conform can be overwhelming. We’re often forced into moulds that we just don’t fit into, making us feel estranged from who we truly are. We feel unaligned with our true selves, fighting to just be seen. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">And it can make us feel so alone. So unheard. So desperate to find our way back to who we are and what we want out of life. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">If that’s the case and it’s more than just my friend and I that feel this way, maybe it’s a good idea to look into this – loss of control. For my friend, for me and for whoever reads this. </span></p></div>
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<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>5 Ways to Find Your Anchor</strong></h2></div>
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<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img fetchpriority="high" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/02/Woman-in-Black-Spaghetti-Strap-Top-Meditating-by-Mikhail-Nilov-from-Pexels.jpg" alt="Woman in Black Spaghetti Strap Top Meditating by Mikhail Nilov from Pexels" title="Woman in Black Spaghetti Strap Top Meditating by Mikhail Nilov from Pexels" class="wp-image-235140" /></span>
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<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Having an anchor in life – whatever that anchor is – allows you to have clarity amidst all of life’s chaos and confusion. The practice of being anchored can also help you focus your energy on the things that are important to you in life, keeping you moving in the right direction and keeping you on track with meeting your goals. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">So, here are 5 ways that you can keep yourself anchored – </span></p></div>
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<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Practice a body scan breathing exercise</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – This is a mindfulness meditation practice and is a pretty beneficial way to reconnect with your body, calm your mind and connect with your emotions. You start by finding a comfortable, preferably quiet place to sit or lie down comfortably. Take a few deep breaths and close your eyes. Start at your head and move down to your toes, taking slow deep breaths as you focus on each part of your body. </p>
<p>Notice how each part feels, paying special attention to any physical sensations, emotions or thoughts that come up. Keep in mind that there’s no right or wrong way to do it. If you get distracted (which is ok), redirect your mind back to the process and start where you left off. Take a deep breath in, focus on your hands – how do they feel, move your fingers, what sensation do you feel? Do any emotions come up as you move your fingers? Feel the energy flow through your fingers as you move them around. Let your breath out. Count to 5, now move to your chest… and so on.</p>
<p>This should help you feel calm, reduce stress and help you feel more connected to your body, something we don’t do enough of. </span></p></div>
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<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Repeat this mantra – <i>I am just (insert name)</i> </strong><span style="font-weight: 400;">– This is an important practice not only of self-acceptance but also of acknowledging that that is who you are. It’s like an anchor to your core identity; to feeling like your authentic self. Whenever you feel lost, repeat this mantra to yourself and allow it to reconnect you with who you really are. Anchor your name to the person you want to be – to your core self. Have it mean something other than “your name”. The things that make you “you” become your “anchor.” Anchoring is the practice of returning to this awareness, grounding yourself back in the person you’ve consciously chosen to be. </p>
<p>“</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">I am Alicia. I am a successful writer, loving wife, mother to four fur babies, romantic, world explorer, dreamer and never-say-die optimist</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">”. That’s who I AM. That is my core identity. What’s yours? Have it mean something. So, when you are in doubt, remind yourself of </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">who you ARE. </span></i></p></div>
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<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/02/Mindfulness-Practices-Woman-Journaling-by-Eliza-Alves-from-corelens.jpg" alt="Mindfulness Practices Woman Journaling by Eliza Alves from corelens" title="Mindfulness Practices Woman Journaling by Eliza Alves from corelens" class="wp-image-235139" /></span>
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<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Practice mindfulness in everything you do</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – Ok maybe not everything you do, pick two things. Be realistic. Like mindfully walking or mindfully brushing your teeth. It’s the act of becoming more self-aware and noticing your thoughts and feelings while you perform normal, everyday activities. According to the </span><a href="https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/consumer-health/in-depth/mindfulness-exercises/art-20046356"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Mayo Clinic</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">, mindfulness is a type of meditation in which you focus on being intensely aware of what you’re sensing and feeling in the moment, without interpretation or judgment. It’s about getting to know yourself through menial acts and not judging how you react to certain banal activities. It’s like getting down to basics and really reacquainting you with you. </span></p></div>
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<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Name three people</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – This is another act in developing better self-awareness. Name three people whose values you are drawn to and with whom you have fostered a deeper personal connection. This exercise will increase your awareness of what qualities you want and what would be impactful for you in that exact moment. You can start by thinking of three people who you admire. These could include celebrities, athletes or family members. Hold them in your mind and list all the qualities you admire about them. Then use the list and look at how you spend your time, energy and resources. Interestingly, the list you generate is like shining a flashlight on the values and skills you aspire to have in your own life. Perhaps you admire someone who speaks eloquently and you want more of that in your life. You could begin spending time with others who possess this quality, take a class to develop this skill or set an intention to act more in that manner throughout the day. </span></p></div>
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<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Visualise and apply</strong> <span style="font-weight: 400;">– This is something you can do every day. Start by visualising your ideal day, what does it look like? Where would you be? What would you be doing? Who would be there with you? How would you feel? Focus on that. Then start with your mini action plan. Ask yourself what you really want for the day, set those goals and then, for that day, take consistent action towards achieving your ultimate vision for the day. I find that having mini goals each day and then working towards achieving them makes it feel less daunting. Like today I have achieved X and that can feel so rewarding when your life feels so untethered. Then, by the end of the week, you’ll have achieved a number of things – making the mountain into a mole hill – easy to traverse. </span></p></div>
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<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">All of these exercises are there to help you find your way back to you. They are there to help you plant your feet back onto the ground, tethering you to the Earths’ surface. That way you not only feel connected to yourself, but you can also start building connections to other people, taking daily steps to do more of what is good for you. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">So, find your anchor, something that resides within you and that remains untouched by the external chaos. It can be your value system, your faith, a creative outlet or a connection with nature. The essence lies in cultivating a connection with yourself. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">By discovering your anchors, you become very selective with your energy and where you direct it. Enjoy the process and above anything else, be kind to yourself during this process. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It’s something my friend and I remind each other of as we undertake to do – at the very least – practice mindfulness while we brush our teeth (it’s twice a day all!), get reconnected with our bodies and remind ourselves about who we </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">are –</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> every single day. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">If you need help in practicing mindfulness or becoming more self-aware while you are finding your anchor, contact Frieda Levycky of </span><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Braving Boundaries</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> who can support you in creating the life you want. </span></p>
<p><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">(Sources used and to whom we owe thanks – </span></i><a href="https://www.cexperiences.com/how-to-find-a-solid-anchor-for-your-life/"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">CExperiences</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">; </span></i><a href="https://braincleanupcoach.com/how-to-identify-your-anchors/"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Brain CleanUp</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">; </span></i><a href="https://www.gvsu.edu/cms4/asset/8C0B809B-0726-4E3B-1EBA4A40A82D8597/developing-the-anchor_blog.pdf"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Developing the Anchor</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">; </span></i><a href="https://www.kratimehra.com/anchor-grounded-confident-uncertainty/#:~:text=A%20certain%20degree%20of%20self,buy%2C%20or%20your%20social%20image."><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Kratimehra</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">; </span></i><a href="https://medium.com/@shorombo/staying-grounded-in-a-fast-paced-world-the-power-of-personal-anchoring-f04cd9a26897"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Medium</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> and </span></i><a href="https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/consumer-health/in-depth/mindfulness-exercises/art-20046356"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Mayo Clinic</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">). </span></i></p></div>
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<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span>
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<div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p>
<p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:[email protected]" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">[email protected]</a> </strong></div>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/when-life-feels-out-of-control/">When life feels out of control: 5 ways to find your anchor</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<title>Dealing with disappointment</title>
<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/dealing-with-disappointment/</link>
<comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/dealing-with-disappointment/#respond</comments>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
<pubDate>Mon, 21 Dec 2020 07:33:11 +0000</pubDate>
<category><![CDATA[Celebrations & Festivities]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[Lawyer Life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category>
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<category><![CDATA[a covid christmas]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[a covid christmas story]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[a lawyer christmas]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[an attorney christmas]]></category>
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<category><![CDATA[climbing the corporate ladder]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[covid christmas rules]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[dealing with disappointment]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[disappointment]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[festive season]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[good mental health]]></category>
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<category><![CDATA[the grinch]]></category>
<guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/how-the-grinch-stole-christmas-or-did-he-copy/</guid>
<description><![CDATA[<p>As stricter restrictions on movement and gathering are implemented around the globe, there is a real sense of disappointment as we head into the Festive Season. Read this short article on how to cope with the mix of emotions which are being experienced at present and find some tips to bring positivity back into the Festive Season.</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/dealing-with-disappointment/">Dealing with disappointment</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
]]></description>
<content:encoded><![CDATA[<h3><strong>Disappointment: A feeling we hate to cause and struggle to feel.</strong></h3>
<p>And 2020 has provided many a chance to experience it from both sides. </p>
<ul>
<li>Weddings postponed</li>
<li>Holiday plans abandoned</li>
<li>Sports events cancelled</li>
<li>New babies unvisited</li>
<li>Graduation celebrations thwarted</li>
<li>And now, for many countries, a strict lockdown over Christmas all together.</li>
</ul>
<p>The list goes on! COVID has really thrown us through the ringer this year!</p>
<p><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/linkedin-filler-pictures-18.jpg" sizes="(max-width: 810px) 100vw, 810px" srcset="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/linkedin-filler-pictures-18.jpg 810w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/linkedin-filler-pictures-18-300x167.jpg 300w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/linkedin-filler-pictures-18-768x427.jpg 768w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/linkedin-filler-pictures-18-500x278.jpg 500w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/linkedin-filler-pictures-18-800x444.jpg 800w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/linkedin-filler-pictures-18-480x267.jpg 480w" alt="Disappointment" width="810" height="450"></p>
<p>Our struggle with 2020 disappointment is that it feels unjustified – and many people are struggling to cope with the conflict of emotions they are experiencing.</p>
<p>Logically – we know that COVID is a very legitimate and real reason to cancel events. People are worried. We understand it. We acknowledge it. But, when things get cancelled, it doesn’t stop us feeling:</p>
<ul>
<li>angry</li>
<li>rejected</li>
<li>deflated</li>
<li>overwhelmed</li>
<li>sad</li>
<li>frustrated</li>
<li>annoyed</li>
</ul>
<p>… to name but a few. All feelings which are naturally triggered when we are faced with disappointment.</p>
<p><strong><em>And, do you know what, it’s ok to feel this way.</em></strong></p>
<p>Even though we understand the reasons, we are allowed to feel the effects. Money has been wasted. Children have shed tears. Images of perfect celebrations have been re-shaped. And there is a tonne of guilt (on many levels) going around as a result.</p>
<h3>How to deal with disappointment</h3>
<p>For those of you who are putting on a brave face, don’t let the emotions fester inside. You know it will only cause more pain in the long run. Instead: </p>
<ul>
<li>Process the disappointment now</li>
<li>Acknowledge the feelings</li>
<li>Acknowledge the conflict between the feelings</li>
<li>Know that your feelings are justified</li>
<li>Gain perspective by speaking to friends and family</li>
<li>Talk it through with those that have been involved</li>
<li>And then, accept it for what it is and move on</li>
</ul>
<h3><strong>Adjusting to a Festive Season in lockdown</strong></h3>
<p>As many countries start to implement stricter measures on movement and gatherings over the Festive Season, there is a realisation that a traditional Christmas / Hannukah is not going to be possible this year. For many of us, it’s the second or third time we’ve adjusted holiday plans to cater for COVID risks.</p>
<p>There is a very real risk that we start to feel that the festivities has been cancelled completely this year. </p>
<p>It would be understandable to want to motor through the Festive Season and start a fresh in 2021. </p>
<p><em><strong>But, this year, more than any other, <a href="https://www.tech4law.co.za/business/practice-management-d58/lawyers-on-leave/">taking a break</a> and making the most out of the Festive Season is vital to recharge, re-set and prepare for 2021.</strong></em></p>
<p>Whilst Christmas may not be the same as usual, it doesn’t mean it has to be a complete write-off. 2020 gives us a chance to mould and adapt our holiday traditions and try out something new this year. And you never know – there may actually be some new traditions created in the making. </p>
<p>Whether you are alone this Holiday Season or with a smaller family gathering, take a read of the previous article: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/how-the-grinch-stole-christmas-or-did-he/">“How the Grinch stole Christmas … or did he?”</a> for <strong>14 festive tips</strong> to help you thrive (not just survive) the 2020 Festive Season and set you up for a great start to 2021. </p>
<p><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/17-DEC-1024x1024.jpg" sizes="(max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px" srcset="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/17-DEC-1024x1024.jpg 1024w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/17-DEC-300x300.jpg 300w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/17-DEC-150x150.jpg 150w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/17-DEC-768x768.jpg 768w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/17-DEC-500x500.jpg 500w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/17-DEC-800x800.jpg 800w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/17-DEC-980x980.jpg 980w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/17-DEC-480x480.jpg 480w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/17-DEC.jpg 1080w" alt="How the Grinch stole Christmas ... or did he?" width="1024" height="1024"></p>
<h3>Wishing you and your loved ones a relaxing Festive Season and a smooth entry into 2021.</h3>
<p>_______________________________________</p>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/dealing-with-disappointment/">Dealing with disappointment</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<title>How the grinch stole christmas … or did he?</title>
<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/how-the-grinch-stole-christmas-or-did-he/</link>
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<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
<pubDate>Thu, 17 Dec 2020 07:00:38 +0000</pubDate>
<category><![CDATA[Celebrations & Festivities]]></category>
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<description><![CDATA[<p>Ready for some 2020 Christmas fun? The Holiday Season is certainly feeling a little different this year, but let's not write it off just yet! There's a lot of fun to be had and things to be grateful for. Here are some tips and tricks to make the most of the Festive Season!</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/how-the-grinch-stole-christmas-or-did-he/">How the grinch stole christmas … or did he?</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
]]></description>
<content:encoded><![CDATA[
<h6 class="wp-block-heading"><em>Co-written by Frieda Levycky, Founder of <a href="http://www.bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>, and Alicia Koch, Founder of <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist</a> </em></h6>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">“Holiday who-be what-ee?”</h3>
<p>Exactly that – <em>who-be, what-ee</em>, is it really Christmas time?</p>
<p>At the best of times, Christmas is an emotional time of year! But this Holiday Season feels particularly glum. </p>
<p>The Grinch feels like he has very much taken up residence in our homes, in place of the festive “Elf on the Shelf”. Eying out our tree decorating and Menorah lighting with smug cynicism.</p>
<p>Some of us even seem to be mimicking the Grinch’s holiday “cheer”: <em>“Blast this Christmas music! It’s joyful and triumphant.”</em></p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">The most emotional time of the year!</h3>
<p>For some of us, the Holiday Season is a time of happiness and connection: family gatherings, long overdue catch ups with friends, end of year drinks, sneaky kisses under the mistletoe, Christmas pantos, the annual trip to the ice rink, shopping at the Christmas markets, all those tasty treats (mince pies, gingerbread, mugs of glühwein and a good old Terry’s Chocolate Orange), and all the smells that the festivities bring (cinnamon, nutmeg, roasted chestnuts, mmmm!).</p>
<p>There is an excitement in the air; an anticipation; a playfulness.</p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/elf-mince-pies.jpg" alt="Elf on the Shelf"/></figure>
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<p>For others, the Holiday Season triggers a lot more trepidation than excited anticipation. The annual family feud, the confusion over choosing gifts, heightened stress-levels as the in-laws rock up and immediately comment on the dust on the mantlepiece (rather than the beauty of the 6-course meal painstakingly prepared over the last 24 hours) … you know the family. You know the drill!</p>
<p>But, for once, even those that usually have a spring in their step as Santa’s pending arrival draws near, are feeling the dark cloud cloaking the 2020 Holiday Season.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Exit left Santa!</h3>
<p>This week alone, I’ve heard countless stories of:</p>
<ul class="wp-block-list"><li>friends cancelling large family Christmases in order to protect older family members</li><li>the loneliness of expats who are not able to get home for their annual family catch-up</li><li>the disappointment as the annual New Year ski trips are abandoned</li><li>elderly family members not being allowed out of nursing homes for safety reasons</li><li>hopes of re-connection dashed as office parties are scratched</li><li>even the Christmas carol concerts have taken a back seat this year</li></ul>
<p>Excitement, joy, fun, sparkle, glitter and celebration seem to have been lost from the human vocabulary. Exit left Santa. The Grinch is taking the leading role in this year’s Christmas panto!</p>
<p><strong><em>OH NO HE ISN’T! OH YES HE IS!</em></strong></p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/33.jpg" alt="How the Grinch stole Christmas"/></figure>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Adapting to a Christmas in lockdown</h3>
<p>Ok, it’s a given, Christmas is looking and feeling a little different this year. A year of COVID confinement and restriction has resulted in fun and frivolity being replaced with feelings of boredom, anger, disappointment, loneliness and exhaustion.</p>
<p>The Grinch tip-toeing merrily behind you gleefully chanting: <em>“One man’s toxic sludge is another man’s potpourri”. </em></p>
<p><em>Well at least he’s happy…!</em></p>
<p>And it would be understandable to want to motor through the Holiday Season and start a fresh in 2021. Where is the nitrous when you need it (Fast and Furious scenes springing to mind)?</p>
<p><em><strong>But, this year, more than any other, <a href="https://www.tech4law.co.za/business/practice-management-d58/lawyers-on-leave/">taking a break</a> and making the most out of the Holiday Season is vital to recharge, re-set and prepare for 2021.</strong> </em></p>
<p>The reality is, COVID ain’t going anywhere (at least not any time soon – come on vaccine), so let’s use the Holiday Season wisely.</p>
<p>Whilst Christmas may not be the same as usual, it doesn’t mean it has to be a complete write-off. 2020 gives us a chance to shake things up a bit. A chance to mould and adapt our Christmas traditions and try out something new this year. And you never know – there may actually be some new traditions created in the making. And that’s a good thing!</p>
<p>So, for one last time, let’s say out loud 2020’s phrase of the year: <em><strong>“Let’s pivot!”</strong></em> (Eish! That phrase is getting well and truly left behind once this year is over!)</p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/christmas-down-time.jpg" alt="Christmas down time"/></figure>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>14 tips to help you thrive (not just survive) the pinch of the Grinch!</strong></h3>
<p>We all love a good sing-a-long, or, if we don’t, we at least know how songs (and more importantly the lyrics) can affect our mood. So, with this in mind, here are <strong>14 festive song-themed tips</strong> to help you thrive (not just survive) the 2020 Holiday Season and set you up for a great start to 2021.</p>
<p>And whilst you’re at it – in true festive style – why not turn it into a game and try and guess the songs and singers too!</p>
<p>Bear with me, some lateral thinking and artistic licence may be required here <img src="https://s.w.org/images/core/emoji/15.0.3/72x72/1f60a.png" alt="😊" class="wp-smiley" style="height: 1em; max-height: 1em;" /></p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/14-tips-to-help-you-thrive-not-just-survive-the-holiday-season.jpg" alt="14 tips to help you thrive (not just survive) the holiday season"/></figure>
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<figure class="wp-block-image size-thumbnail"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="150" height="150" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1-150x150.png" alt="" class="wp-image-1486"/></figure>
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<p><strong><em>“Do you wanna build a snowman?”</em></strong></p>
<p>You should never lose your childish enthusiasm or sense of wonder. Ever. Especially during the Holiday Season. And especially in 2020. Get creative, use your imagination and try your hand at <em>making gifts</em> for family and friends. Not only does this help you think outside the box but it also helps you tap into your creative side – perhaps a side of you that has been neglected during 2020’s stressful times. How about a family board game? Or love vouchers for your partner?</p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image size-thumbnail"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="150" height="150" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2-150x150.png" alt="" class="wp-image-1487"/></figure>
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<p><strong><em>“[Not] driving home for Christmas”</em></strong></p>
<p>2020 will undoubtedly come with some of its own benefits. Like not having to race around this Holiday Season. Not having to attend party after party. Not having to visit each and every family member or friend. Not having that obligation (which seems harsh but is sometimes true) of <em>“being on form”</em> – being jovial, telling jokes and being unrealistically optimistic. It may be tradition but geez it’s exhausting and is usually fuelled with arguments. This year you get to plan your own festivities – on your own terms. Stay in your pyjamas if you want to. Get your kids to each organise a day of activities. Do it your way – not the way it <em>“should”</em> be (whatever that means).</p>
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<p><strong><em><strong><em>“Feed the world! Let them know it’s Christmas time.”</em></strong></em></strong></p>
<p>Be grateful for what you have. We may all be struggling this year, but for many, our Holiday Season struggles are a far cry from the <em>daily</em> struggles of others. There are some incredible organisations out there trying to make this Holiday Season a little bit brighter and happier for those that have so little. With restrictions imposed on volunteering this year, consider donating a small amount to soup kitchens, such as the ROKPA soup kitchen (<a href="https://www.rokpa.org/en/what-we-do/africa/south-africa/soup-kitchen.html">https://www.rokpa.org/en/what-we-do/africa/south-africa/soup-kitchen.html</a>). You can also support the amazing organisation Food Forward SA (<a href="https://foodforwardsa.org/">https://foodforwardsa.org/</a>) where with a donation of R255 you can feed one person a day for a whole year; OR pack a shoebox for Santa so he can distribute personalised essential items and treats to underprivileged children throughout South Africa and Namibia (<a href="https://santashoebox.org.za/">https://santashoebox.org.za/</a>).<br>Giving back not only humbles us but it makes us so thankful to have what we have. As modest as that may be.</p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image size-thumbnail"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="150" height="150" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/4-150x150.png" alt="" class="wp-image-1489"/></figure>
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<p><strong><em><strong><em><strong><em>“Last Christmas I gave you my heart and the very next day you gave it away.”</em></strong> </em></strong></em></strong></p>
<p>Oooh the awkward Christmas Party with cheap drinks, bad hang-overs and cringe worthy distant memories of singing out of tune during Karaoke sing-a-longs (cue <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wp0zyiJPrGk">Bridget Jones</a>)! Kissing underneath the mistletoe with your friends <em>“fix-me-up”</em> distant cousin (we have all been there in some way or another) – no thanks! At least this year, you can skip those (un)pleasantries and watch Bridget Jones for the umpteenth time instead (laugh at her totally embarrassing moments instead).</p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/Christmas-party-kisses.jpg" alt=""/></figure>
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<p><strong><em>“Voices singing, let’s be jolly”</em></strong></p>
<p>Take some time to look back on the things you have actually been grateful for this year. Being grateful and happy about the small things will help you look forward to the bigger things with optimism and hope. No one is saying, <em>be jolly for the sake of being jolly</em>. But what we <em>are</em> saying is this – look back on your year realising that some of the little moments, like simply being able to sit with your kids whilst they play “tea party” or just being able to indulge in an episode of “New Girl” during your lunch break (whilst working remotely) were pretty great things. Don’t forget the small precious moments that have made your year possibly better than you initially thought. </p>
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<p><strong><em>“Everybody spread the word, we’re gonna have a celebration”</em></strong></p>
<p>And whilst you are thinking about what you’re grateful for, also reflect back and think about what you’ve accomplished in 2020, even if it is small. Remember all you have overcome, even if it is only a start. Be proud of making it through, even if it is only by the skin of your teeth. Because truth be told, it is the reality for many of us. And know this – you can (and must) celebrate you!</p>
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<p><strong><em>“I don’t want a lot for Christmas. There is just one thing I need.”</em></strong></p>
<p>Just one thing. This year is certainly going to be a little tighter on the purse strings. As salaries have been lowered, bonuses foregone, businesses disrupted, down payments on weddings, parties and office celebrations lost, money concerns have been at the forefront of everyone’s mind. So let’s not add Christmas presents to the worry list. There’s a lot more to Christmas than giving and receiving presents and maybe this is the year to apply office giving logic to our family Christmases. Why not opt for a Secret Santa instead? Everyone coming for Christmas buys one present either for a lucky dip or for a specific person. Even the kids. They understand that this year’s different, so why not still make it fun?</p>
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<p><strong><em>“And His shelter was a stable. And His cradle was a stall”</em></strong></p>
<p>So yes, our usual Christmas traditions may be out of the window this year – what with Christingle services cancelled, children’s nativity plays postponed and travel restricted (etc. <em>ad nauseam</em>) but there are some really innovative and creative twists on usual traditions this year. For example you can <a href="https://www.therock.org/nativity/">drive through</a> real life nativity plays, join fun <a href="https://spectacularpubquizzes.com/">virtual</a> quizzes, <a href="https://www.houseandgarden.co.uk/article/online-carol-concerts-2020">online</a> carol concerts and roof top concerts. There are endless opportunities to still make this Holiday Season one to remember. Best of all, you can attend all these events in your pyjamas – which is a real plus for us! And your furry family can join along too. Bonus!</p>
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<p><strong><em>“The boys of the NYPD choir were singing Galway Bay. And the bells were ringing out for Christmas day”</em></strong></p>
<p>Whether you celebrate Christmas or Hanukkah, or maybe you don’t celebrate anything specific at all, the Holiday Season is a time for rejoicing. It is a time when twinkly lights are up, where there is tinsel around trees and <a href="https://stories.starbucks.com/press/2020/savor-the-flavors-of-starbucks-holiday-food-and-beverages/">Starbucks brings out their eggnog latte</a>. It is a time to look at the world through red and green tinted glasses. Perhaps with some hope? Perhaps with a smile? Perhaps with a dash of optimism? And if none of those things gets you singing ‘<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ifzaff5woBA">Rudolph the red nose Reindeer”</a>, perhaps a slice of pumpkin pie from <a href="https://sweetteachickadee.co.za/">Sweet Tea and Chikadee</a> or a bite of a fruit mince pie (a favourite) may lift the spirits. Perhaps just for a few days you can forget the scales? Indulge a little and get back on the treadmill once the festivities have stopped. If you can’t indulge now (and on your Birthday), when can you? For <em>“The bells were ringing out for Christmas Day!”</em></p>
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<p><strong><em>“</em></strong><strong><em>The word is out. About the town. So lift a glass. Ahh, don’t look down”</em></strong></p>
<p>The world may not be about the town and “lifting a glass” alone may seem mournful. But now is not the time to let COVID take away our gaiety! So lift your darn glass, pop your champagne (there are non-alcoholic versions) and cheers to the year that gave us perspective. Cheers to the year that has made us think about our futures. Cheers to the year that gave us time to reflect on the truly important things. It may have been tough. But it has not all been bad. So don’t look down – look up! Look forward. And rejoice in that. </p>
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<p><strong><em>“A thrill of hope, the weary world rejoices, For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn'”</em></strong></p>
<p>2021 is around the corner – a brand new year. A brand new start. Rather than panicking your way into the new year with promises of 5 days a week at the gym and dropping a stone by the end of January, take the festive break to <em>really think about who you want to be a year from now</em>. What are you doing? How are you feeling? <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-best-laid-plans-of-mice-and-lawyers/">What do you want your life to look like?</a> Then think of one tiny step you can take to help you get there. Get some inspiration by listening to the latest episode of the <strong>Lawyer Life Experiment Podcast:</strong> <a href="https://www.buzzsprout.com/1516372/episodes">New Year Resolutions that work!</a></p>
<p>If transition is on the cards for you for 2021 and you need some support in putting your plan into action: book yourself a Basic Balance session with <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/work-with-me-individuals/">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<p>“<strong><em>Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)”</em></strong></p>
<p>We may not be able to be with our loved ones this year. And that sucks. Dinners and lunches may very well be small but also intimate. And just because you can’t be with your loved ones physically, doesn’t mean you can’t celebrate with them remotely. With Zoom, Skype and social media we can still have our family sing-a-longs, quizzes and well wishes from afar. So whilst you cannot hug, you can still blow kisses online. Don’t underestimate what that can do….</p>
<p>Also, this may be the perfect time to invite over (remembering to keep gatherings small), friends that have no family to celebrate with. Make up your own “family gathering” and bring a smile to someone’s face who may have been home alone this Holiday Season. Small gestures of kindness and inclusion can change everything for someone who has been dreading loneliness on Christmas. </p>
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<p><strong><em>“You Make It Feel Like Christmas”</em></strong></p>
<p>Just like the song goes: <strong><em>“I want to thank the storm that brought the snow. </em><em>Thanks to the string of lights that make it glow. </em><em>But I wanna thank you, baby. </em><em>You make it feel like Christmas.”</em></strong></p>
<p>Remember to take some time out for your loved one. Take time out for your partner. As we head into the New Year, it is all too easy to simply take our partners for granted. 2020 has certainly tested relationships. It has sadly broken some couples up, but it has also made others stronger. If you (hopefully) fall into the latter category, take some time to simply show your gratitude and appreciation for the person you have by your side. Nothing fancy, a simple “I love you and appreciate you” will do. But do it!</p>
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<p><strong><em>“Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock</em></strong>”</p>
<p>And when all else fails, something we like to do, is turn up the tunes, pour some glühwein and rock and sing the night away. You know the saying – “<em>Dance like no one is watching and sing like no one is listening”</em>. And sometimes a good rock-a-thon shakes away the cobwebs, gets the adrenalin going and before you know it, you are lying on the floor panting away and laughing out loud! Go for it!</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>“I’m all toasty inside.”</strong><strong> – well, almost!</strong></h3>
<p>With a cup of hot chocolate and a marshmallow or two, it may be feeling a lot like Christmas to you…</p>
<p>So, it may not be the Holiday Season that we imagined, but with a dash of perspective and a sprinkle of creativity, we can certainly have a Holiday Season that we will enjoy … <em>we can curtail our inner Grinch and carry on with the show.</em></p>
<p>As the Grinch regales:</p>
<p><strong><em>“It came without ribbons. It came without tags.</em></strong></p>
<p><strong><em>It came without packages, boxes or bags.</em></strong></p>
<p><strong><em>Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before:</em></strong></p>
<p><strong><em>“Maybe Christmas” he thought, “doesn’t come from a store”.</em></strong></p>
<p><strong><em>“Maybe Christmas perhaps means a little bit more.”</em></strong></p>
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<p>About the Co-author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong></p>
<p>Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism. </p>
<p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>.</p>
<p><strong>Email: [email protected] </strong></p>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/how-the-grinch-stole-christmas-or-did-he/">How the grinch stole christmas … or did he?</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<title>The best laid plans of mice and lawyers!</title>
<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-best-laid-plans-of-mice-and-lawyers/</link>
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<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
<pubDate>Wed, 02 Dec 2020 15:30:09 +0000</pubDate>
<category><![CDATA[Lawyer Life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[Life after Law]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[work-life balance]]></category>
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<description><![CDATA[<p>For some of us, practising law is a life long passion. We love the adrenaline, the intellectual challenge, the structure and identity the Law provides. But for others - there is a realisation that the Law is not for us. What then? What does life look like after law? Let's find out.</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-best-laid-plans-of-mice-and-lawyers/">The best laid plans of mice and lawyers!</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<h6 class="wp-block-heading" id="written-by-alicia-koch-founder-of-the-legal-belletrist"><em>Written by Alicia Koch, Founder of <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist</a> </em></h6>
<p>When I studied law I imagined that I would do great things – be a defender of justice. Of sorts. I had planned on building a name for myself, having an Ally McBeal kind of reputation – the “benchmark” when I was still studying law.</p>
<p>But sometimes the <a href="https://www.dictionary.com/browse/the-best-laid-plans-of-mice-and-men-often-go-awry#:~:text=No%20matter%20how%20carefully%20a,Gang%20aft%20a%2Dgley.%E2%80%9D"><em>best laid plans of mice and men often go awry</em></a>. And I have started to understand that it <em>is</em> actually <em>ok</em> – the going awry bit.</p>
<p><em><strong>It is ok to change your course, to change your focus, to change your career. To simply change.</strong></em></p>
<p>As my friend, Adaptive Attorney, CEO & Founder of <a href="http://www.impassion.co.za/">Impassion-Transcend Yourself</a>, Jennifer Amy Stoler would say – <em>“You are not a tree, you can move”. </em>And that really puts things into perspective. Having roots can be a very powerful thing. Especially when you think about your home and your family. But roots can also keep you “stuck” in a place you do not fully want to be in. Preventing your evolvement into something new.</p>
<p>Suffocating you, without you fully realising that you have stopped breathing…. </p>
<p>So stop. Take a deep breath. And let’s dive in – the water is fine (I promise).</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="diving-in">Diving in!</h3>
<p>Like many people who have studied law, I thought – this was it. I would be in a law firm all my life. I would pay my dues, work the long hours and deal with the back stabbing and corporate politics (which I despised). I convinced myself that the money I would earn would be enough. Enough to sacrifice everything else – like my happiness. And for a while it worked. I believed I was <em>“happy”.</em> I had the flashy car, earned a decent six figure salary and was able to buy the things that made up for the hollowness I felt deep inside. But after more than a decade of practising, I slowly began to realise that money was not enough (not by a long shot). And the soft whisper of <strong><em>“I don’t want to do this anymore”</em></strong> started ringing louder and louder in my ears.</p>
<p>Until I couldn’t ignore it anymore.</p>
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<p>But what would I do? My specialty was the law. In drafting contracts, in advising, in giving opinions and in winning arguments. I didn’t know anything else. I didn’t know how to <em>really</em> change (like fundamentally change). Not that I hadn’t tried over the years….</p>
<p>I mean, I had moved around quite a bit in my career (in search of <em>“my place”</em> in the world) – from law firms, to my own legal consulting practice, going into corporate to be in house-counsel trying renewable energy and insurance law on for size. But nothing quite fit. At least not comfortably.</p>
<p>Lana Del Rey’s song <em>“Blue Jeans”</em> comes to mind – <em>“You fit me better than my favourite sweater”</em>. But I simply was not feeling it – <em>the legal sweater kind of made me itch</em>.</p>
<p>And I realised (after having a very honest and frank discussion with myself in the mirror) that it wasn’t <em>them</em>, it was <em>me</em>. And a break up was imminent.</p>
<p>You see, it wasn’t the law I disliked. I actually appreciate the mechanics of the law and have the utmost respect for my colleagues who practise with fervor day in and day out. It takes guts, it takes grit, it takes dedication and it takes sacrifice. To practise law requires an unwavering passion – because being a lawyer is a true calling. The practice of law is a vocation to be respected. And I honestly do. I am just not sure I have the right amount of grit to <em>grin and bear it</em>.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="but-what-is-life-without-the-law">But what is life without the law?</h3>
<p>Acknowledging that you want to take a path away from the law and actually <em>stepping on to a path</em> are two very different things. </p>
<p><em><strong>What path should you take? What path can you take? What path do you want to take?</strong></em></p>
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<p>And therein lies the problem – because I do not think any of us (that have studied law) have really been equipped with the right tools to understand that there is more “out there” than just working in a law firm. That <em>there is more to us than <u>just </u>being a lawyer</em> (even though being a lawyer <em>is </em>enough, if that is what you want).</p>
<p>In fact, in various discussions regarding the future of law, many have said (myself included) that lawyers need to do more than <em>“just” expense legal advice</em>. Lawyers need to be in the thick of it, getting their hands well and truly dirty. Lawyers need to focus on the business end of doing business in order to better advise their clients – who now expect their lawyers to be <em>“more” than just lawyers </em>(whatever that means).</p>
<p>And in this same vein of <em>“being more”, </em>lawyers like myself, are coming to their own conclusions that they <em><u>can</u> be. More</em>.</p>
<p>They just need to figure out what they want that <em>“more”</em> to look like.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="sisters-doing-it-for-themselves">Sisters doing it for themselves!</h3>
<p><em>Frieda, Jennifer and I walk into a bar</em>, all with the same vision of wanting to change the legal profession. In some small, <em>but significant way</em>.</p>
<p>While we are all in the general vicinity of law, the three of us have found our own little niches within the legal space that are both new and exciting. And most importantly, <em>right for us</em>. We have all found a way to utilise our individual legal backgrounds and skills gained over the years to <em>“be more than <u>just</u> lawyers”</em> –</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="a-content-management-company-the-legal-belletrist-by-alicia-koch">A content management company – <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist</a> by Alicia Koch</h3>
<h6 class="wp-block-heading" id="i-want-to-remove-the-stigma-that-all-lawyers-are-uptight-and-only-speak-in-legalese-we-are-people-with-a-sense-of-humour-and-a-sense-of-irony-too"><strong><em>“I want to remove the stigma that all lawyers are uptight and only speak in legalese. We are people, with a sense of humour and a sense of irony, too”. </em></strong></h6>
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<p>I am an admitted attorney with over a decade of post qualification experience (PQE). I started <em>The Legal Belletrist</em> <em>(TLB) </em>during lockdown of one of the most difficult years in recent history. It initially came out of necessity (as I was out of work and did not really have any idea what my next step ought to be) but in truth, starting TLB resulted in the discovery of my “<a href="https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/heartsong#:~:text=Noun,identity%2C%20and%20reason%20for%20existence.">heartsong</a>”. I mean, I had always loved writing and had been writing legal articles for <a href="https://www.golegal.co.za/author/alicia-koch/">GoLegal</a>, for a number of years. But it had never occurred to me that I could actually make a living from writing full time. I mean, e<em>arning a living from doing something you absolutely loved</em> was a completely foreign concept to me. Until I did.</p>
<p>After panicking about how I was going to find a job during a global recession in an industry inundated with brilliant legal minds, I bit the bullet, changed my title on LinkedIn from Legal Counsel to Legal Writer and Researcher (a big moment for me), built my own website using <a href="https://www.wix.com/">Wix</a> and designed a logo using <a href="https://www.canva.com/q/pro/?v=2&utm_source=google_sem&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=REV_ZA_EN_CanvaPro_Branded_Tier1_Core_EM&utm_term=REV_ZA_EN_CanvaPro_Branded_Tier1_Canva_EM&gclsrc=aw.ds&&gclid=CjwKCAiA5IL-BRAzEiwA0lcWYu-mSCcRlYAoNO-8sAjURl0cl7xIYYYGSkjbNuGggi6GSQHL0PPaYhoCT_0QAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds">Canva</a> (all free platforms that are easily accessible). But my vision was absolutely clear. It still is. I knew exactly what I wanted my future to look like. And I built it – from scratch. Without knowing <em>for sure</em> it would work, without much of a plan. But I started. And within a few days of doing so, had secured my first regular client and have been happily writing ever since. And earning a living! I can’t believe it – <em>I sometimes pinch myself to make sure I am not dreaming</em>….</p>
<ul class="wp-block-list"><li><em>My determination to succeed comes down to this – is the juice worth the squeeze? Because the truth is – you can do whatever you want, if you put your mind to it. If it is worth it and truly meaningful to you, no amount of difficulty will stop you. You just need to start.</em></li></ul>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="life-coaching-for-legal-professionals-braving-boundaries-by-frieda-levycky">Life coaching for legal professionals – Braving Boundaries by Frieda Levycky</h3>
<h6 class="wp-block-heading" id="i-want-to-provide-a-safe-place-for-lawyers-to-discuss-their-struggles-both-professional-and-personal-without-the-fear-of-judgment-or-repercussions-so-that-they-can-start-to-build-happier-healthier-and-more-fulfilling-lives"><strong><em>“I want to provide a safe place for lawyers to discuss their struggles (both professional and personal) without the fear of judgment or repercussions, so that they can start to build happier, healthier and more fulfilling lives.”</em></strong></h6>
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<p>Frieda is an admitted (and practising) English solicitor with over 15 years’ of PQE. She has navigated her way through the <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-fear-around-mental-health-in-the-legal-world/">legal world</a> from trainee to in-house counsel to partner (in a “Big Law” law firm) and now life coach. She loves the practice of law and has thrived in her international M&A practice. But it was the structure and hierarchy of law firms that made her realise that they are sorely short of the all-important “soft skills”. The skills that most people take for granted, but desperately require, in order to not only survive each day but also to thrive in their careers (and personal lives).</p>
<p>Law firms are unfortunately notorious for paying lip-service to mental health issues, but doing little to encourage good mental health practices amongst their staff. This is an area of the legal profession that Frieda wants to change both at the corporate and individual level. Being a solicitor herself, she is fully aware of the range of situations in which a lawyer’s health and well-being is challenged. Through her <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/">Braving Boundaries</a> practice, she provides a safe space for lawyers to voice their personal and professional struggles and supports them in making the changes they desire to create happier, healthier and more fulfilling lives (both professionally and personally). She also seeks to help law firms and corporates tackle poor practices contributing to poor mental health and well-being issues through group coaching and workshops.</p>
<p>For a lot of her clients, it is the <em>need for a change</em> that drives them to seek her guidance – because they simply do not have the first clue about how to make a meaningful change themselves. Again, they do not possess the tools they require to recognise <em><u>what else</u> they are good at</em> in order to create change in their lives. And this is where Frieda steps in – she helps you discover the skills and capabilities that you <em>already possess</em> to make the fundamental change you desire.</p>
<p>To this end, Frieda is on a mission to humanise the law – to bring it into the modern world – and rid it of institutionalised and archaic practices that no longer serve the industry.</p>
<ul class="wp-block-list"><li><em>Frieda’s determination to succeed comes down to finding courage in one’s self to make the change. And we all have it in us. </em></li></ul>
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<figure class="wp-block-image"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/Jennifer-Amy-Stoler-1024x1024.jpg" alt="Jennifer Amy Stoler"/></figure>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="an-alternative-legal-practice-impassion-transcend-yourself-by-jennifer-amy-stoler">An alternative legal practice – Impassion – Transcend Yourself by Jennifer Amy Stoler</h3>
<h6 class="wp-block-heading" id="i-want-to-empower-and-educate-my-clients-so-that-they-can-envision-and-achieve-their-own-goals-the-power-is-not-only-in-the-hands-of-the-lawyers-but-in-the-hands-of-the-clients-as-well"><strong><em>“I want to empower and educate my clients so that they can envision and achieve their own goals – the power is not only in the hands of the lawyers but in the hands of the clients as well…”</em></strong></h6>
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<p>Jennifer’s life was full of law – she had surrounded herself in and with it. She always understood where she wanted to be, but she knew it would take small steps to get there. During her (decade long) legal career, with the assistance of her erstwhile mentor, she ran a thriving family practice which, from the get-go, she had decided would be run differently to other family law practices. Not everyone agreed with her methods – but she powered on, always setting out to develop a trust relationship with her clients ensuring that she could <em>engage the law in a way that would serve her clients in the best way possible</em>. <strong><em>For them</em></strong><em>.</em> She took on a very active role in setting up her successful practice by speaking at events and seminars, by creating a podcast called the <strong><em>“Lawyer and the Layman<img src="https://s.w.org/images/core/emoji/15.0.3/72x72/2122.png" alt="™" class="wp-smiley" style="height: 1em; max-height: 1em;" /></em>”</strong>, by doing radio and TV interviews and by presenting workshops to educate and empower people with legal information. </p>
<p>This took immense sacrifice on Jennifer’s part – creating the content for the workshops and the seminars, ultimately resulted in her complete burn out. She suddenly recognised that she was missing out on some fundamentally important aspects of her life – like <em>simply living</em>.</p>
<p>But, through this burn out, she came to understand that all the time she was spending creating content for the workshops, seminars and podcasts, fueled her soul and helped her discover what she wanted to focus on. She sought to build a practice where she could connect with people and impact the legal space in a new way – in her own, unique way. Her aim was to build a practice surrounded by trust, where she was <em>seen as a human being before being seen as just a lawyer</em>.</p>
<p>Jennifer started to think outside the box and discovered that her power was not only found in the law, <em>her power lay in the education and empowerment of her clients</em>. Her practice is designed to encourage trust, both in the process but also in the legal system (a term she has defined as “trustice”) through the development of small “self- help”, practical and actionable steps to ease her clients through their legal crisis (a term she refers to as “legal easement”). Through the use of <em>trustice</em> and <em>legal easement</em>, Jennifer assists her clients to attain the justice that had previously eluded them.</p>
<p>Essentially, Jennifer’s successful alternative legal practice comes down to four important pillars – empowerment, education, trust in the legal system and practical actionable solutions.</p>
<ul class="wp-block-list"><li><em>Jennifer’s determination to succeed came from trusting herself and her vision and just taking the leap. When taking this leap, she didn’t know how she was going to fly, but she built her wings on the way down, and they are purely liberating.</em></li></ul>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="i-want-what-they-have">I WANT WHAT THEY HAVE!</h3>
<p>If you are looking for a change from the law, but are struggling with where to start, Frieda, Jennifer and I have come up with the following “pearls of wisdom”:</p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/new-career.jpg" alt="New career chapter one"/></figure>
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<p><strong>Get to know yourself</strong> – what is your vision, what do you want, what do you want your future to look like, what are your passions, what are your beliefs, what is your purpose, what gets you out of bed? Get clear on who you are. It’s the most important step. If you need some support in discovering your skills and capabilities, seek the help of a coach, like <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/">Braving Boundaries</a> to help you develop a plan to get you to your end goal.</p>
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<p><strong>Research</strong> – Get on to the internet, speak to recruiters, talk to law professors, talk to family friends – find out about what other careers lawyers have switched into. There are plenty of us out there. I know of journalists, geologists, CEOs, entrepreneurs, doctors – all who have been lawyers too!</p>
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<p><strong><strong>Educate yourself (humbly becoming a student again)</strong></strong> – Once you know what you want to do, work out if you’ve got the skills to do it. If not, it’s time to go back to school (well, figuratively) – do workshops, webinars, whatever it takes to get you to your end goal.</p>
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<p><strong>If time is on your side, use it </strong>– Sometimes we are thrown into situations where we have to find new jobs and careers merely to pay the bills. When it comes to a change in career though (and you have the job security), use the time wisely. Don’t jump until you are sure you like where you will be landing.</p>
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<p><strong>Do not entertain doubt – </strong>acknowledge that imposter syndrome is something which you are highly likely to experience – and is very real! Shake the monster from your head, look yourself dead in the eye (in the mirror of course) and repeat “<em>You have got this”</em> until you believe it.</p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/impostor-syndrome.jpg" alt="impostor syndrome"/></figure>
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<p><strong>If you are going solo, acknowledge that things are going to feel pretty uncomfortable for a while – </strong>Be prepared for <em>“</em><em>comparisonitis</em><em>”</em> (constantly comparing yourself to other businesses in the same area), overwhelm, self-doubt and the crazy notion of <em>“What was I thinking!”</em> – Don’t worry! This is all perfectly normal. You’ve merely stepped out of a well-oiled corporate machine and are learning to build a new (and improved) one from scratch. Be patient. Freak out with your support network (I know I have). And remember why you decided to make the jump of faith in the first place.</p>
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<p><strong>Understand that even the <em>best laid plans of mice and men go awry</em></strong> – even with the most well thought out plan of action, things don’t always go according to plan. But having a plan fail, does not mean all is lost – <em>“it is never rejection, it is re-direction”. </em>Get up, dust yourself off and try again.</p>
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<p><strong>How you feel today will influence how you feel tomorrow</strong> – so change the thought and the feeling will follow.</p>
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<p><strong>Get up and show up</strong> – Every time<strong>. </strong>Make your bed, have a cup of coffee (or tea) and take a deep breath of the fresh morning air. Sometimes a simple change in perspective can help you see clearly.</p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/coffee.jpg" alt="coffee"/></figure>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="the-juice-will-be-worth-the-squeeze">The juice will be worth the squeeze!</h3>
<p>Remember change and transition is very difficult. For anyone and everyone. But if the regular legal route is not your thing, <em>you can become something else</em>. In fact, <em>you should become something else</em>. And there are so many other options out there. We have given you only three examples of alternate legal routes that <em>three female legal professionals</em> have taken. During 2020 of all years! But there are many more routes. Many more possibilities which are (honestly) endless. And better years to make a change….</p>
<p>There is no limit to what you can do – <em>think outside the box.</em></p>
<p>Change is good, even if it is hard – <em>the juice will be worth the squeeze!</em></p>
<p>And if you need some more encouragement –</p>
<p><strong><em>”If we don’t change, we don’t grow. If we don’t grow, we aren’t really living”</em> – Gail Sheehy</strong></p>
<p><strong><em>“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance”</em> – Alan Watts</strong></p>
<p>So dance, dance and dance. And if you don’t know the steps, seek a partner who can teach them to you….</p>
<p><strong><em>Cha-cha-cha</em></strong><strong> my friends, <em>cha-cha-cha</em></strong>!</p>
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<p><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" sizes="(max-width: 810px) 100vw, 810px" srcset="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/time-for-a-change.jpg 810w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/time-for-a-change-300x167.jpg 300w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/time-for-a-change-768x427.jpg 768w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/time-for-a-change-500x278.jpg 500w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/time-for-a-change-800x444.jpg 800w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/time-for-a-change-480x267.jpg 480w" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/time-for-a-change.jpg" alt="time for a career change?"><br></p>
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<p>Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism. </p>
<p>About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong></p>
<p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>.</p>
<p><strong>Email: [email protected] </strong></p>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-best-laid-plans-of-mice-and-lawyers/">The best laid plans of mice and lawyers!</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<title>Mind the Gap! How to attract and retain Millennial legal talent</title>
<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/mind-the-gap-how-to-attract-and-retain-millennial-legal-talent/</link>
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<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
<pubDate>Thu, 22 Oct 2020 15:42:46 +0000</pubDate>
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<description><![CDATA[<p>Attracting and retaining young Millennial legal talent today is not easy. They are a new breed of lawyers operating on a different set of priorities and values. This brings a welcome and healthy change to the legal world, but certainly leaves the Baby Boomers and Gen Xers scratching their heads in confusion and frustration when trying to grow their businesses. So how can the legal sector better adapt in order to not only attract but also retain this valuable, young talent pool of lawyers? </p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mind-the-gap-how-to-attract-and-retain-millennial-legal-talent/">Mind the Gap! How to attract and retain Millennial legal talent</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<h6 class="wp-block-heading" id="co-written-by-frieda-levycky-founder-of-braving-boundaries-and-alicia-koch-founder-of-the-legal-belletrist"><em>Co-written by Frieda Levycky, Founder of <a href="http://www.bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>, and Alicia Koch, Founder of <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist</a> </em></h6>
<p>Say what you will about <a href="https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/a30644196/what-is-millennial-generation-age-range/">Millennials</a>, they bring a refreshing and much needed change to the <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-fear-around-mental-health-in-the-legal-world/">legal world</a>. Technologically savvy – they are efficient, innovative and capable of re-shaping the <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-legal-sector-has-a-very-real-mental-health-problem/">legal sector</a> into a much more flexible and streamlined animal. But they are also emotionally and mentally aware and believe in self-preservation. Their personal needs are considered, if not before, at least alongside those of the business. Something quite foreign for the <a href="https://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2008/06/25/baby-boomers-the-gloomiest-generation/">Baby Boomer</a> and <a href="https://www.theladders.com/career-advice/these-are-generation-x-characteristics-in-the-office-and-their-new-label">Gen X</a> lawyers whose personal lives have always been <em>secondary to their careers</em>. One could say that Millennial lawyers are a “new breed” altogether.</p>
<p>It is no surprise that the older generation of lawyers are struggling to get to grips with this new breed of lawyer, often finding themselves scratching their heads in both confusion and frustration. A group of young, self-aware, confident, capable and innovative individuals whose values and work ethic are very different to that of their elders. Gone are the days of lawyers entering a law firm “for life” or sacrificing their personal lives. Millennials are a generation who graduated during the Global Financial Crisis and have watched their parents and seniors struggle with stress, workaholism, divorce, drinking and substance abuse. As a result, they are more frugal, less money driven, and more focused on a career that provides for a proper work-life <em>blend</em> (not just a balance).</p>
<p><em><strong>So how can the legal sector better adapt in order to not only attract but also retain this valuable, young talent pool?</strong></em></p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="the-millennial-lawyer-psyche">The millennial lawyer psyche</h3>
<p>Millennials are one of the largest and most important generations of <em>our</em> time. They account for about a quarter of the world’s population at around 1.8 billion people and, although they are still young, <em>how</em> they conduct business and <em>how</em> they view a company is crucial.</p>
<p>According to the <a href="https://www.abajournal.com/magazine/article/mind-the-gap">ABA Journal</a>, incorporating this divisive yet influential generation into the business is <em>crucial</em>. So the Baby Boomer and Gen X colleagues will need to learn how to <em>successfully</em> integrate their Millennial counterparts into the businesses. Quickly. And this will be particularly important for law firms, where the power of Millennial lawyers is huge—by virtue of sheer numbers alone.</p>
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<p>But Millennials, according to <a href="https://www.forbes.com/sites/sarahlandrum/2017/11/10/millennials-arent-afraid-to-change-jobs-and-heres-why/#1ff2c4d19a50">Forbes</a>, are not afraid to job-hop. They are not satisfied with being stuck in a “dead-end job” and as a result will leave a company should it not be <em>the right fit</em>. Whilst this may seem ‘flaky” to the older generations, Millennials are more likely to earn a higher wage, develop their career on a faster track and find a better fit in work culture by changing jobs more frequently.</p>
<p>But in a sector of the economy where annual turnover is already extremely high, legal recruiters are seeing an uptick in young associates changing jobs at a disconcerting pace. Millennial lawyers are leaving a job, not just when they are unhappy, but when they are not happy <strong><em>enough</em></strong>. And that is an important consideration as it requires “more” from the respective employers.</p>
<p>Law firms need to look at <em>what</em> will motivate young Millennial lawyers to stay in their firms (or corporates), long term. Although this may take some effort, NOT trying to retain these young lawyers will result in additional training and additional costs. Neither of which comes cheap.</p>
<p>According to a <a href="https://www.acc.com/sites/default/files/2019-06/ACC_Benchmark_062019.pdf">study</a> by the Association of Corporate Counsel, law firm turnover costs the legal industry nearly US$1 billion annually as law firms spend time and money on-boarding associates (from recruiting to training) and must thereafter reinvest when <strong><em>anothe</em>r</strong> associate needs to be hired to replace one that has left. A continuous and expensive cycle.</p>
<p>And this is where it gets interesting … because for a law firm to remain relevant and in order to solidify their future in an ever-changing and unpredictable world, firm leadership must focus on <strong><em>what motivates and inspires Millennial lawyers</em></strong> in order to not only ensure continuing business but also to save millions and millions of firm capital.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="the-millennial-lawyer-mindset-explained">The Millennial lawyer mindset explained</h3>
<p>JP Box, a Millennial and writer of <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Millennial-Lawyer-Motivate-Retain-Associates/dp/B079R8FYY2">“The Millennial Lawyer: How Your Firm Can Motivate and Retain Young Associates,”</a> while aiming to help frame the generational divide that leads to misunderstandings between associates and partners, also illuminates the Millennial mindset in order to help law firms understand <strong><em>how to connect with, motivate and retain</em> </strong>the very best young (Millennial) lawyers:</p>
<p><em>“Millennials, Gen Xers and Boomers share many common values, but differ in how they prioritize, express and act upon those values.</em></p>
<p><em>Let me provide an example. Millennials overwhelmingly believe in doing well by doing good – that is, working hard to make the world a more beautiful place through their chosen professions. Some Gen Xers and Boomers chose careers to fulfil this value, while many others used their careers as a springboard to engage in social-minded activities outside of work (for example, by serving on non-profit boards and donating to worthy charities). In contrast to those Gen Xers and Boomers who are comfortable finding outlets outside of work to give back to their communities, millennials believe that work should be the vehicle through which they make the world a better place.</em></p>
<p><em>Importantly, millennials are not comfortable compartmentalizing their lives between work, family, friends, charity and play. While “<strong>work-life balance” became a rallying cry of Gen Xers in the 1990s, millennials opt for “work-life blend,</strong>” in which they wish to achieve personal, professional and charitable goals on a continuous spectrum of life experiences. Millennials chafe against the notion of balancing work’s ambitions against life’s desires because, to this generation, <strong>they are part of the same continuum</strong>.</em></p>
<p><em>By recognizing this critical distinction, law firm partners and recruiters can begin to understand how to motivate the youngest generation of lawyers. Hint: it’s not just by the promise of a billable hour bonus at the end of the year. Rather, by focusing on the noble practice of law (that is, doing well by doing good), partners can unlock the talents, passion and work ethic of millennial lawyers”.</em></p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="ok-so-what-will-attract-young-lawyers-to-a-law-firm">Ok, so what <em>will</em> attract young lawyers to a law firm?</h3>
<p>Essentially it really boils down to bringing back humanity, collaboration and involvement into the legal working environment. <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-work-from-home-saga/">Flexibility</a> is already a given. But bringing “heart” back into the work space seems to be the overarching factor. It amounts to a proper <em>work-life blend</em> (not just a balance) – a little like having your cake and eating it too. And what is <em>really</em> wrong with that?</p>
<p><em><strong>I like eating my cake!</strong></em></p>
<p>So, here are some key strategies we believe will help attract (and retain) young lawyers:</p>
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<p><strong>Collaboration & involvement</strong> – Make an effort to ensure that Millennials feel like they are an integral part of the team from the get-go. That they have a voice, that they are making a difference. It’s about giving them visibility of the bigger picture so that they can see why the hard work is benefiting their client and the world at large.</p>
<p>A fun idea is to perhaps create a physical space that will enhance a collaborative and engaging work environment, for example some firms, like Morrison & Foerster, are offering <a href="https://www.attorneyatwork.com/what-motivates-millennials-retaining-young-lawyers/">“lounge-braries”</a> — a hybrid lounge and library where lawyers and staff can work and socialize together.</p>
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<p><strong>Bring them into the business side of things early</strong> <strong>on</strong> – Millennials are a generation of influencers – you’ve seen them on Instagram, YouTube, Facebook and Tik-Tok – they have followings into the thousands! The thing is, the clients of today (and of the future) are also influencers and therefore use the same communication platforms. They talk a different language to the old guard, so law firms and corporates need to start talking the same language by utilising the valuable tools at hand – the Millennial lawyer. This links to the collaboration and involvement point that we spoke about above. But this benefits the firm as well as the Millennial lawyer.</p>
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<p><strong>Provide mentoring and support </strong>– This is absolutely key.</p>
<p>We can all learn from each other, and the millennial generation knows that. They may be “<a href="https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/technoid#:~:text=technoid%20(comparative%20more%20technoid%2C%20superlative,%2Dsounding%3B%20resembling%20techno%20music.">technoids</a>” and able to operate every communication channel under the sun, but they lack the legal experience that is only gained by working in the legal industry for a number of years. They still need to learn the ropes. The Baby Boomers and Gen Xers still have a lot of valuable lessons to be conveyed to the younger generations about law but also about office politics (which, as we know, can be a jungle).</p>
<p>Remember it was the Gen Xers who started the move towards a work-life balance. So the Millennials should take a page from the Gen Xer’s “hard learnt lessons” book. Where at all possible, there should be access to a mentor and/or coach which supports the young lawyers in being made to feel like an integral part of the team, early in their careers and from Day 1. Group coaching and access to work shops is also a valuable resource as it promotes a meaningful career success path that is aligned with the Millennial lawyers’ values and strengths.</p>
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<p><strong>Training </strong>– Law is a business and not a purely advisory role anymore. In order to achieve this ‘all in one’ package there needs to be skills training on negotiation, management and business development and this needs to begin at the junior level, not left to when the lawyer reaches seniority (<em><strong>#toolittletoolate</strong></em>). Never mind something to be “expected” anymore, juniors and mid-level associates are going to <em><strong>need to/have to</strong> </em>learn how to take on business development earlier – it’s where the new pool of clients are – and they are the ones who speak the same language. It may be a pertinent (scratch that, “good”) idea to give these young lawyers the tools they require early on and support them as they grow.</p>
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<p><strong>Regular and practical feedback so that they can grow and “bounce back” if they are</strong> <strong>struggling</strong> – Described by <a href="https://nation.time.com/2013/05/09/millennials-the-next-greatest-generation/">Time</a> as narcissistic, lazy, “coddled” and even a bit delusional, Millennials are constantly seen as hard-work and demanding of attention. But regular (not just annual) feedback helps. And Millennials (and other future generations) will want this regular and <em>practical </em>feedback in order to grow and improve. And this is the best way to help them to do so. Providing clear guidance on <em>how</em> to improve is key. Just because regular feedback was not provided to older generations to enable improvement, does not mean it is the correct course of action to take. After all, how else do you (really) learn?</p>
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<p><strong>Checking-in </strong>– Whilst linked to mentoring, Millennials need to <em>know</em> that their difficulties and struggles in the workplace are being taken seriously and that their overall well-being is a priority. People are more likely to stay (and be loyal to) and <strong><em>want</em> </strong>to work in an environment which cares about them. And shows it.</p>
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<p><strong>Flexible and agile working arrangements </strong>– Tech works. It is that simple. And 2020 has proven it. Tech provides for more work-life blend. Not being in the office doesn’t mean that you are not working – it doesn’t mean you are lazy. With regular communication and check-ins, this model can keep the team feeling like a unit without the need to be physically present <em>all</em> the time. It is also more efficient. As simple as that. Remember, the aim is not to <em>erase</em> the physical model, after all we recognise that there is benefit that comes from social interaction in order to avoid professional stagnation. But it is undeniable that tech and flexibility in the workplace creates a much better work-life blend.</p>
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<p><strong>Educate around career options </strong>– We know Millennials (and generations to come) will job hop. But this means that they may become clients in the future or that they may operate in roles that can support law firms in other ways. And this can only be beneficial, if advantage is taken of it. What do we mean? Well, Millennials are (generally) loyal to the people that they like and have treated them well. It may not be a case of staying in the same firm long term, but they will stay in touch with a firm that they had a positive experience at. Even Gen Xers know that people can come back and our paths cross later down the line – so being supportive and understanding that variety in a career is a necessity (and a long-term game), will be beneficial. Especially in the long run. And especially when paths cross again. You know the old adage – <em><strong>“Don’t burn your bridges”.</strong></em></p>
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<p><strong>Address mental health issues head on </strong>– We have covered issues around mental health for a number of weeks now. And by now, we are all familiar with the alarmingly high incidence of depression, substance abuse and suicide amongst lawyers. Millennial lawyers want to know that their firms/companies are not sticking their heads in the sand when it comes to mental health problems and that they have <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/law-firms-8-ways-to-improve-your-staff-mental-health/">practices and programmes</a> in place to support and address these issues openly and supportively. And not just in 2020. But for years to come.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="let-them-eat-cake"><strong>“</strong><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Let_them_eat_cake"><strong>Let them eat cake</strong></a><strong>”</strong></h3>
<p>Whilst this quote made Marie Antoinette very unpopular amongst her French citizens, having your cake and eating is what has made Millennials a generation to be reckoned with. </p>
<p>And if one were to ask this Gen Xer what would have kept her in a law firm, I would have been very happy with the simple but over-used – I want a good “work-life<em> balance</em>”…. Kind of like asking for a slice of bread when cake is being offered on a golden platter. But with Millennials driving the way that firms operate and how they treat their staff in the workplace, it very much sounds like cake will be on the menu for a long time to come.</p>
<p>And one might say –”<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4iEdMMjqdA">Please, Sir I want some more</a>”!</p>
<p>#worklifeblend</p>
<p>#thanksmillennials</p>
<p>#haveyourcakeandeatittoo</p>
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<p>About the Co-author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong></p>
<p>Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism. </p>
<p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>.</p>
<p><strong>Email: [email protected] </strong></p>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mind-the-gap-how-to-attract-and-retain-millennial-legal-talent/">Mind the Gap! How to attract and retain Millennial legal talent</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<title>The Work from Home Saga</title>
<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-work-from-home-saga/</link>
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<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
<pubDate>Fri, 25 Sep 2020 06:38:42 +0000</pubDate>
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<description><![CDATA[<p>2020 - it's been quite a year, hey! Where are those ruby slippers when you need them?! But, let's take a look at what a year of working from home has taught us. Join us for a fun and insightful trip down the Yellow Brick Road.</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-work-from-home-saga/">The Work from Home Saga</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
]]></description>
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<h2 class="wp-block-heading">THE WORK FROM HOME SAGA</h2>
<h5 class="wp-block-heading"><em>An article by Alicia Koch, Founder of <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist</a> </em></h5>
<p>I have a shoe fetish. There I said it. I confess. Shoes are my “thing”. I have a whole Instagram account just about shoes (I’m not joking). And over the years, I have amassed quite a collection. Louboutin, Jimmy Choo, Manolo Blahnik. You name it. </p>
<p>And because I am short, they are high. Like 12 cm stiletto heel high. And I use to love to flaunt myself around in them. A once-upon-a-time (self-proclaimed) “glamazon” I now find myself prancing around my home in my sheepskin slippers. Not at all the same thing.</p>
<p>My shoes must have thought I died!</p>
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<p>I mean, who would have thought that on New Year’s Eve 2019 we were looking ahead to a future full of lounge wear (as opposed to couture, pajama’s all day) because, <em>who cares?</em> Zoom calls from bed, “because you can” and Netflix binges during lunch times, <em>sans</em> the prying judgmental eyes of colleagues, because during your free time you can do whatever you want. Right? Basically a year full of (what my grandmother would call) laziness and slobbery. Which I obviously take offence to because well, I only wear pajama <em>bottoms</em> all day.</p>
<p>But it is only recently that we have (at least in South Africa) been allowed to venture out, go shopping, have a wax and our hair coloured (those grey hairs were peaking out a little too much from the roots), making an effort to look less like the <em>“Wicked Witch from the West”</em> and a little more like Dorothy in her red glittery shoes (or some variation of that). It is only recently that we have been allowed to eat out at restaurants where we have been able to order a glass of wine and, in essence, return to some semblance of normality. Whatever that means….</p>
<p>It really has been a trip down the <em>“yellow brick road”</em> and no amount of clicking our heels, repeating over and over again – <em><strong>“There’s no place like home”</strong></em> will take us back to where we want to go. Which for most of us, is anywhere but 2020. Because the truth really is – we <strong><em>are</em> </strong>home. And whilst there is no place like it, there has, most certainly, been challenges.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Welcome to Oz</h3>
<p>When I arrived in Oz (fear not, I have not immigrated!), I wasn’t at all out of place. I had been here before. Many times over the last few years during consulting gigs or in-between jobs. I knew my way around the place and was quite content with my little corner of the world, where I could set up shop and start working. I have never been as fancy as other people. I do not have my own home office. I work from my dining room table, which is long and wide and has lots of space to spread out my research and notes on articles I have been writing. With no one but my two cats and a pot of coffee, I have always been content at my dining room table, which overlooks my old lemon tree. I kept a work schedule, got up early (as one normally would), had a healthy breakfast, went to gym (on a good day) and started to write by 9h30am. Which I know is late for some. But it worked for me. And by the time hubby arrived home from work, I had packed up for the day and was ready to spend quality time with him talking about our days. It was blissful (a little like a trip back in time to 2019). And our home was a happy and content one with set boundaries, time and space allocations for specific tasks.</p>
<p><strong>Then Covid hit and the world went into Lockdown.</strong> We all know the story by now…. Companies around the world closed their doors and most employees were told to work from home. Oz seemed rather crowded, with no set boundaries and set time and space allocations, it was a little like a free for all. And I have been less than amused.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading"><b>The yellow brick road</b></h3>
<p>The journey down the yellow brick road starts off innocently enough. Everyone walking hand in hand down the road together. Families start off singing and humming tunes (mostly out of key but in sync), as they walk together down the road. But things can turn dark, quickly.</p>
<p>The saying goes that “<strong><em>absence makes the heart grow fonder</em></strong>”. So having a place to go when working and having your own space (even if it is an open plan office) before coming home to a shared space with your partner (and kids), is often needed. Couples (generally) look forward to seeing each other at the end of the day or like to sneak in a quick call to see how each other’s day is going. But that has changed. And calling your spouse from the room next to yours does not count – <em><strong>#heightoflaziness</strong></em>.</p>
<p>When working from home, couples are finding themselves spending 24 hours a day together and there is very little separation between work life and home life. Many couples have quickly realized that what they usually find endearing about their significant other, can become less so, when they are permanently embedded in their work space.</p>
<p>For example I never knew I was the kind of person that required complete silence and peace when writing articles. I like to play Beethoven, have my coffee and calmly plan my day. I never knew (because I have worked in open plan offices many times before) that I was the kind of person that gets annoyed by the smallest thing – like talking.</p>
<p><em><strong>And my husband talks. A lot.</strong> </em>To clients, to colleagues. To himself (when writing emails). So, managing the two extremes has been challenging. With my reaction to my husband saying out aloud – “<em>Dear Colleagues”</em> acting like a red flag in front of a bull. All I want to do is charge. But I don’t. Because I am not a violent person (cue <a href="https://www.facebook.com/thelillyslaptsilli/videos/lionels-shnoz/2647608858788130/">Lilly Slaptsilli</a>). But it is tempting. And with a new kitten running around the home like a hooligan with his tail on fire and our older cat hissing because someone has invaded his space, I literally feel like I am in an episode of <a href="https://www.animalplanet.com/tv-shows/my-cat-from-hell/">“My cat from hell”.</a> And there is no Jackson Galaxy to call for help. But I do find that very (very, very) deep breaths help.</p>
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<p>But it seems worse when speaking to friends with children. They have said it has been tough. Like really tough. Like finishing a bottle of wine tough.</p>
<p>Working full time whilst at home, you become not only a mom but a full time teacher, play mate and disciplinarian.</p>
<p>And it can be tiring. When you have a demanding job which requires you to be on Zoom calls during tense negotiations, having your 5 year old little girl running into your “home office” shouting <em>“look mom I am naked”</em> whilst talking to the CEO, senior international attorneys and financiers, is less comical and more mortifying. Especially when no one else laughs. Or when your 6 year old answers your phone and starts grilling your CEO on his age, where he lives and what he likes to eat for dinner. Especially when your CEO has no sense of humour. At all.</p>
<p>So the balance between mom, wife, teacher, full time employee and woman (which has its own stresses of <em>“Does my bum look big in these pants”</em>) has been extremely taxing (without any hope of a rebate from SARS).</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">What will you miss about Oz?</h3>
<p>The obvious one (and what the majority of people have relayed) is flexibility. And I don’t just mean working the hours that suit you. It is more than that. It is being able to have a proper work-life balance (something <strong><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/">Braving Boundaries</a></strong> not only supports but advocates). And something so many of us have fought for over the years. Eliminating the need to commute with time wasted in traffic going to and from meetings and back home again, people have been given some breathing room. And whilst this does come with some cons (not having the separation between work life and home life and having to be not only mom but teacher as well) it does have some major pros.</p>
<p>For example, when asking my close friend (working mom of two) she said she will miss just being able to have lunch with her kids or to take 30 mins out of her day to help her daughter with homework (something the au pair usually helps with). It’s about being around day-to-day for the boring things whilst your kids are growing up. Things we take for granted whilst we work full time in demanding jobs.</p>
<p>I think it’s something we will all miss (not necessarily having lunch with our kids – we are not all parents), rather it will be missing the simple everyday things. Like being able to pop out to the shops to buy ingredients for dinner, or to pop in somewhere to get your nails done (during your own lunch hour) or even simply being able to take yourself to the doctor without having to ask permission to do so.</p>
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<p>It’s just something about not being in an office environment that has allowed people some freedom. And that sounds like a pretty obvious statement. But think about it – without having a colleague asking where you are going, people talking about the hours you have spent out of the office (behind your back) and disapproving looks from your boss – people feel more in control over their work, themselves and their daily lives. And that is such a powerful thing. Being in control. And not something to dismiss or take lightly.</p>
<p>In exchange, a lot of people have become much more productive. In fact in an article on Business News Daily, <a href="https://www.businessnewsdaily.com/15259-working-from-home-more-productive.html#:~:text=Working%20From%20Home%20Increases%20Productivity&text=According%20to%20one%20study%2C%20remote,weeks%20of%20work%20per%20year.&text=One%20of%20the%20most%20effective,taking%20breaks%20throughout%20the%20day." target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Working From Home Increases Productivity</a>, “<em>remote employees work 1.4 more days per month than their office-based counterparts, resulting in more than three additional weeks of work per year</em>”. And that says something about the ability to be in control.</p>
<p>From my own experience (even though I am not new to the working from home lifestyle) if I am out during the day and spend three hours not working, I know when I get home I have to make up those three hours and it often results in me working later into the evening. Which I am happy to do, because I had <strong><em>the freedom to choose</em></strong>. And let’s face it, there are very few employers who are happy to let you decide your own hours, how you practice and when you get work done. Because there is still this mentality of bums on seats and micromanaging teams. Which works (and is required) in some industries (for example like sections of manufacturing, call centres and financial institutions) but it is often stifling for the professional who wants a work life balance (often thought of as a cliché in interviews – <em>what are you looking for from a job?</em>).</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Will you leave Oz?</h3>
<p>With lockdown forcing employers to actually encourage work from home situations, companies have become far more outputs driven than clock watchers. And that really is how it should always have been. I have always felt that happy staff are productive staff. And the numbers prove it. In fact, companies like Twitter have allowed their staff to <a href="https://www.bbc.com/news/technology-52628119" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">work from home “forever”</a>. The decision came as the social media giant said its work-from-home measures during the lockdown had been a success. Whilst at the same time saying that it would allow workers to return to the office if they choose to, when it reopens. Again giving employee’s choice.</p>
<p>This move by Twitter (and other <a href="https://edition.cnn.com/2020/05/22/tech/work-from-home-companies/index.html" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">companies</a> such as Facebook, Square and Spotify – do they all know something we don’t?), has been described by Sree Sreenivasan, a Professor of Digital Innovation at the Stony Brook University School of Journalism in the USA, as an <strong><em>“era-defining moment”</em></strong>. And that is compelling. That working from home is an era-defining move. A lot of us are jointly saying “<em>Amen</em>” to that. Working moms have been fighting for decades to have more of a work life balance, <em>without the judgement</em> (or reduced pay) and it is fantastic that it is <em>seemingly</em> becoming the norm.</p>
<p>With the jury still out as to whether most companies and their respective employees will go back to an office environment permanently, this new ability to choose has definitely given people things to think about. In a good way.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">What will you take away from your time in Oz?</h3>
<p>Well, I can tell you now that it is not blasting <strong><em>“Eye of the Tiger”</em></strong> at 9am (something my 80’s loving neighbor has done for 4 weeks straight). That said, perhaps it does help him “become the tiger” and focus on the prize. I’m not sure. Whatever floats his boat.</p>
<p>But, speaking personally it comes down to being disciplined. And having a plan for your day. Being strict about your work space and the time you spend in it. It is all too easy to take your phone to bed, late at night to answer a work-related email. So, you need to set boundaries. Just because you are at home, does not mean you are available 24 hours a day.</p>
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<p>And for me, it has also been about having confidence in myself. Knowing that I don’t need to be watched like a hawk in order to get a job done. And I think it is the same for many people out there. Micromanaging is out of date. Freedom is the new go to. And with that comes the need to be disciplined.</p>
<p>Forbes.com has provided some very useful tips in their article <a href="https://www.forbes.com/sites/bryanrobinson/2020/03/14/9-tips-to-be-productive-when-working-at-home-during-covid-19/#4108966e5a38" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">9 Tips To Be Productive When Working At Home During COVID-19</a>. It is a really good reference point if you are feeling a little less motivated and need a guideline on how to get yourself back on track. Which does happen. That is why we have road maps. Or Sat Nav for those of us (myself included), who cannot read a map to save their lives. </p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Final thoughts</h3>
<p>It seems to me, that despite being in a place resembling the Emerald City, where our wildest work from home dreams are possibly coming true, it is crystal clear that <strong><em>“We are not in Kansas anymore Toto”</em></strong> (mind you, I am not sure Kansas will ever look the same again).</p>
<p>But despite the changes, the uncertainties and “crystal ball gazing” into what we <em>think </em>our futures are going to look like, one thing is for sure – we have all changed and in that we have all found ourselves, in some way. Even in the smallest of ways.</p>
<p>For me (and possibly for many others), it has been the freedom of choice and how we want to work and how we want to live.</p>
<p>For some, it has been finding their hearts again, like spending quality time with their significant others, their children and their loved ones. Much like the Tin Man finding his heart again. For others, it has involved finding the courage to start something new. To believe in themselves again. Just like the cowardly Lion finding his courage again. And for others, it still remains a search for their ideal working from home situation. Just remember, even Dorothy had many obstacles to overcome in her search for her way home. But during her journey she made friends, went on adventures and in the end, went home with the most amazingly beautiful red glittery slippers!</p>
<p>And isn’t that the point – finding your “thing” at the end of it all? Perhaps the yellow brick road is not so tricky after all.</p>
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<p>This delightful article was written by <strong>Alicia Koch</strong>, <strong>Founder of The Legal Belletrist</strong>.</p>
<p>Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism. </p>
<p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">The Legal Belletrist website</a>.</p>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-work-from-home-saga/">The Work from Home Saga</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<title>Law firms: 8 practical ways to improve staff mental health</title>
<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/law-firms-8-ways-to-improve-your-staff-mental-health/</link>
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<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
<pubDate>Thu, 10 Sep 2020 06:19:07 +0000</pubDate>
<category><![CDATA[Lawyer Life]]></category>
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<description><![CDATA[<p>Law firms: Your staff’s mental health matters. It’s time to take action! And here’s why.</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/law-firms-8-ways-to-improve-your-staff-mental-health/">Law firms: 8 practical ways to improve staff mental health</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<h5 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>Article 5 of 5 in the <em>Mental Health in the Law</em> series</strong></h5>
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<p>Mental Health is a hot topic in the legal industry at the moment!</p>
<p>After the release of the <a href="https://www.americanbar.org/groups/lawyer_assistance/task_force_report/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Task Force Report on Lawyer Well-being</a> in 2016 (an excellent report by the way!), the mental health of legal professionals in the USA was firmly placed on the agenda. Other countries quickly followed suit with additional reports being produced in the <a href="https://www.lawcare.org.uk/images/INFOGRAPHIC-NEW.pdf" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">UK</a>, <a href="https://www.swaab.com.au/news/breaking-anz-meritas-wellness-survey-2019" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Australia & New Zealand</a> and <a href="https://www.oliverwyman.com/content/dam/oliver-wyman/v2/publications/2019/January/mental-health-in-the-workplace-survey-of-hk-empoyees-in-professional-services-firms.pdf" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Hong Kong</a>, amongst others.</p>
<p>Clearly the <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-legal-sector-has-a-very-real-mental-health-problem/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">legal sector has a very real mental health problem</a>.</p>
<p>But what actual strategies have law firms implemented to start improving the mental health of their staff? And, more importantly, what can your law firm do?</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>Why law firms should care about their staff mental health </strong></h3>
<p>I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Your lawyers are your greatest asset. Your prized commodity. Your engine.</p>
<p>Like a car, if you want your law firm / team to function well, you need to keep the engine in good condition.</p>
<p>The <a href="https://www.americanbar.org/groups/lawyer_assistance/task_force_report/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Task Force Report on Lawyer Well-being</a> succinctly highlights the business case for doing so:</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">It’s good for clients</h3>
<p>By investing in improving the mental health of your staff, you will improve:</p>
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<li>Staff communication</li>
<li>Staff productivity</li>
<li>Staff competence</li>
<li>Staff concentration</li>
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<p>All of which are vital to achieve the high standards of ethics and professionalism demanded from the legal sector.
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">It’s good for business</h3>
<p>We all know that staff work better in an environment which is happy, friendly and supportive. And furthermore, it actually makes good business sense.</p>
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<li>It creates a happier and healthier workforce</li>
<li>It creates a more productive workforce</li>
<li>It creates a more engaged workforce</li>
<li>It builds trust between the law firm and your staff</li>
<li>It reduces the number of sick days being taken</li>
<li>It improves staff retention</li>
<li>It builds office morale</li>
<li>It improves your corporate image</li>
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<p>Based on that list, investing in mental health initiatives for your staff’s wellbeing is a bit of a no-brainer!
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">It’s the right thing to do!</h3>
<p>Aside from the fact that caring for your staff’s mental health can improve the firm’s bottom line, there is also a moral obligation to do so.</p>
<p>Legal professionals spend on average between 60-80 hours a week in the office (even if that is a home office) – more time than they spend at home. You are dependent on them as much as they are dependent on you. Their lives and their careers matter. So, support them by encouraging and actively promoting good mental health initiatives and real life balance.
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">My experience</h3>
<p>When I started out as a lawyer back in 2004, mental health was never a topic on the table for discussion.</p>
<p>I grew up in a legal world which was all about ‘<em>toughening up</em>’, ‘<em>pulling the hard hours whilst you are young</em>’ and ‘<em>earning your stripes</em>’.
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<p>I’d often chat to my superiors who would quite happily regale their personal stories of:</p>
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<li>5 solid days and nights in the office to complete a transaction,</li>
<li>weekend trips to Australia for a family wedding because that’s all the time they had, and</li>
<li>feasting on a 3am dinner of m&ms and oreo cookies at the printers whilst prospectuses were being finalised.</li>
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<p><strong style="font-size: 15px;">They wore it like a badge of honour. And so I mirrored that behaviour.</strong></p>
<p>What was not spoken about openly – but merely as a source of hushed toned gossip in the kitchenette – was:</p>
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<li>The senior associate crying in the toilet during that 5-day stint after a huge row with her husband for missing their daughter’s speech and drama exam.</li>
<li>The partner lashing out at his exhausted junior associate for missing two typos in the prospectus and kicking the printer in a state of fury.</li>
<li>The sadness of the single, in-house counsel who left yet another friend’s wedding wishing she was in a happy relationship. If only she had the time to meet someone.</li>
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<p><strong>And because the above was not spoken about openly, the silenced experiences were repeated once again.</strong></p>
<p>I’d love to say that things have changed, but 15 years later I continue to see the same scenarios emerging.</p>
<p><em>So, for a legal world that now allegedly promotes the importance of mental health and mental health awareness, how is it that the above scenarios are still happening?</em>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">When lip-service is no longer an option
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<p>Before I highlight a couple of the amazing mental health and well-being initiatives, in general, the emphasis on improving mental health in the legal world is still far below an acceptable standard.</p>
<p>It is:</p>
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<li><strong>no longer sufficient</strong> to have a mental health strategy which consists of a few pretty A4 posters dotted around the office claiming that mental health awareness is important to the firm.</li>
<li><strong>no longer sufficient</strong> to fully promote #mentalhealthawareness for a day, week or month per year (brilliant CSR branding, but …) and then have no ongoing strategy in place to keep the importance of mental health at the forefront of everyone’s mind.</li>
<li><strong>no longer sufficient</strong> to promote the fact your firm has signed up to the Mindfulness Business Charter or the Pledge on Well Being, and then pay lip-service to that fact.</li>
<li><strong>no longer sufficient</strong> to expect your individual staff members to take sole responsibility for their own mental health issues. Yes, they have a responsibility (see last week’s article: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/10-tips-for-lawyers-who-want-to-improve-their-mental-health/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">10 tips for lawyers who want to improve their mental health</a>), but, so do you as a law firm.</li>
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<p>Many firms still have no mental health and well-being policies or strategies in place. And there is a general reluctance to spend money on such initiatives, as if the mental health of staff were merely a “nice to have” – another place to cut costs whilst struggling out of COVID-19.</p>
<p>In fact, this is probably the one place where you shouldn’t be scrimping on costs at the moment.</p>
<p><strong>Protect your staff. Help your staff. Care for your staff.</strong>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">What mental health initiatives are working out there?</h3>
<p>Having said that, I do want to highlight two examples of mental health and wellness initiatives which have been instigated by legal firms (one global and one regional) which are having a <strong>really positive impact</strong> on the mental health of their staff and the working environment.</p>
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<p><strong>Herbert Smith Freehills (HSF)</strong> – In 2018, HSF launched <a href="https://www.herbertsmithfreehills.com/diversity-and-inclusion">Thrive</a>, the mental health initiative which forms part of HSF’s wider global diversity and inclusion (<strong>D&I</strong>) strategy. Whereas most D&I policies tend to focus on equality, HSF has a dedicated initiative to mental health. The firm’s partners and associates also actively speak about mental health awareness across social media platforms. Initiatives include:</p>
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<li><strong>“This is me” campaign</strong> – where individuals at all levels of the firm openly talk about mental health and their own experiences with poor mental health – breaking the stigma associated with discussing such topics.</li>
<li><strong>Mental Health Champions</strong> (UK, EMEA and Australia) – training individuals at all levels of the business to better understand common poor mental health conditions, how to spot early signs of possible issues and how to direct such individuals to appropriate support.</li>
<li><strong>How We Work</strong> – This is actually my favourite initiative. Why? Because it’s simple and it addresses the crux of the mental health problem in the legal sector. It promotes small changes to typical law firm behaviours which don’t promote good mental health. Some examples include: thoughtful delegation, encouraging balance and mindful emails. Check out the <a href="https://www.herbertsmithfreehills.com/diversity-and-inclusion">Guidelines</a>.</li>
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<p><!-- wp:paragraph --><strong>Clarissa Rayward – Brisbane Family Law Centre / Happy Lawyer Happy Life</strong><!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->Clarissa is one of my favourite mental health advocates in the legal space. She is an entrepreneurial divorce lawyer who left big law to establish the Brisbane Family Law Centre back in 2003. It’s not easy going out on your own, and, by 2013, she realised the effects it was having on her happiness levels and mental health. She started the <a href="https://www.happylawyerhappylife.com/">Happy Lawyer Happy Life</a> blog which initially focused on kind, calm and respectful divorce. That blog has now transformed into a global community for lawyers who are struggling with life, love and happiness. She advocates for good mental health in her own Law Centre and to lawyers at large through regular podcasts, an annual retreat for lawyers and workshops and seminars.<!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph --><strong>Why it works?</strong> Because she is passionate and absolutely believes in the importance of health and happiness in lawyers for a successful business. She leads the march and she walks her talk.</p>
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<h3>8 practical ways law firms can improve staff well-being<!-- /wp:heading --></h3>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->Poor mental health and wellbeing is experienced by all legal professionals irrespective of whether they work for a global, regional or boutique law firm.<!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph --><strong><em>NO ONE is immune to poor mental health.</em> </strong>So, a corporate strategy which will benefit <strong><em>ALL STAFF</em> </strong>at some stage of their career is vital.<!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->Here are 8 practical ways that law firms can improve staff well-being:</p>
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<p><!-- wp:paragraph --><strong>Educate around mental health</strong> – Most lawyers still feel awkward talking about mental health as a whole. That is mainly due to a misunderstanding as to what ‘mental health’ actually is (<a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-fear-around-mental-health-in-the-legal-world/">See Article 1 in this series</a>). We, as a legal sector, need to stop this stigma if there is any chance of improving mental health in the workplace. If you have a dedicated diversity & inclusion team which is capable of creating workshops / trainings around mental health, then regularly offer such trainings (at least once a quarter). If not, then <strong><u>invest</u></strong> in external support (such as <a href=" https://bravingboundaries.com/work-with-me/corporate-coaching/">Braving Boundaries</a> or <a href="https://www.lawcare.org.uk/">LawCare</a>) which offer such training. Get your staff talking openly about mental health issues in the workplace: what it is, how it manifests, how they can help themselves and others.</p>
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<p><!-- wp:paragraph --><strong>Walk the talk</strong> – No junior associate is going to look after their mental health, if the senior associate and partner above them is not doing so. As I stated above, we mirror the behaviour of our superiors. If they send emails at 10pm or stay in the office late, their juniors are going to feel obliged to do the same. Change is going to have to come from the top here. If you want a law firm which has a healthy environment, the management team has to walk the talk.</p>
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<p><!-- wp:paragraph --><strong>Manage your clients</strong> – So many of us spend our legal lives living at the beck and call of our clients.<!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->“<em>They pay us so much that we have to be available 24/7</em>” – They pay you so much because you give them valuable advice.<!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->“<em>They expect us to be immediately responsive</em>.” – They expect us to be immediately responsive because we have created that expectation.<!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->Clients (well, most clients) are human too – they have lives outside of the office & understand the importance of work-life balance. Partners have a duty to manage client expectations, to set realistic deadlines that respect the personal and professional commitments of their staff. As well as reducing personal stress, it will also result in greater respect from your clients and your staff.</p>
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<p><!-- wp:paragraph --><strong>Provide appropriate skills training</strong> – Being a lawyer is no longer just about being good at the law – you have to manage teams, negotiate, market and bring in clients. Given that none of these skills are taught during your law degree, it’s not surprising that many lawyers dread client drinks, speaking at seminars or leading a negotiation. It also explains why many lawyers make terrible managers and deeply struggle with business development. Help them to help you. Bring in outside specialists to help develop non-legal skills at an early stage in their legal career. Some examples include: <a href="https://www.necademy.com/">The Negotiation Academy</a>; and <a href="http://rgtraining.co.uk/courses.html">Really Great Training</a>.</p>
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<p><!-- wp:paragraph --><strong>Clamp down on bad behaviour</strong> – There is nothing worse than working in a toxic work environment. Executive management has a responsibility to stamp out behaviour which has a negative impact on the mental health of their staff (e.g. bullying, <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/workplace-ostracism-addressing-the-intangible-office-bully/">ostracism</a>, the sending of nasty emails, yelling, temper tantrums, gossiping etc.). No one should have to tolerate this type of behaviour in the workplace irrespective of the seniority of the instigator. It’s damaging to the team. It’s damaging to the reputation of the firm. It’s damaging to the targeted individual. Consider creating a dedicate Mental Health Committee of team members who genuinely care about the mental health of staff. Create protocols that allow individuals to report such behaviour without fear of retaliation/repercussion.</p>
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<p><!-- wp:paragraph --><strong>Provide access to external coaches / counsellors</strong> – Many global firms include individuals with coaching or counselling training as part of their D&I or HR departments. This is wonderful, particularly from a training aspect. But many staff members will be uncomfortable talking to internal personnel about difficulties at work or home for fear that they will be reported back to management. I’m not saying the fear is rationale, but it is real. In addition, there is a concern that the advice being given by internal staff takes into account the corporate stance, and is therefore less neutral. Provide your staff with a list of coaches/counsellors who specialise in this area. Give them a chance to choose a person who they are comfortable speaking to about their problems. Here are just some of the coaches who specialise in lawyer coaching:<!-- /wp:paragraph --><!-- wp:list --></p>
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<li><a href="http://www.bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a></li>
<li><a href="https://www.principalsofpractice.com/">Principals of Practice</a></li>
<li><a href="https://clairebibby.com/">Claire Bibby</a></li>
<li><a href="https://www.larawentworth.com.au/">Lara Wentworth</a></li>
<li><a href="https://www.theinneradvocate.com/">The Inner Advocate</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.authenticallyspeaking.co.uk/">Authentically Speaking</a></li>
<li><a href="https://www.hirsekorncoaching.com/">Emily Hirsekorn</a></li>
<li><a href="https://www.helenconway.com/">Helen Conway</a></li>
<li><a href="https://www.thehappyfamilylawyer.com/consultant-businesscoach/">Clarissa Rayward</a></li>
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<p><!-- wp:paragraph --><strong>Wave goodbye to the personal / professional divide</strong> – How many of you’ve heard: “<em>Oh that’s a personal issue. Not a concern for the office.</em>”? Unfortunately, if you want to improve mental health in the work environment, that notion is going to need to be set aside. Lawyers are people. They have lives outside of the office and those lives are going to have an impact on them – both good and bad. Take a genuine interest in the lives of your staff and colleagues. Get to know them. It establishes trust between team members, but it will also enable you to spot when behaviour changes and when they may need help.</p>
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<p><!-- wp:paragraph --><strong>Check-in on your staff</strong> – Now, more than ever given the remote working situation, we need to be checking in on each other. Check how your staff are feeling. Check if they are struggling with anything. If there has been an incident at work, follow up the next day and check that they are ok. It’s the little things that count here. If this doesn’t come naturally to you – stick a reminder in your calendar to drop them an email. It takes 1 minute to send a quick message to check someone’s ok.</p>
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<h3>Final thoughts<!-- /wp:heading --></h3>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->An <strong>on-going</strong> and <strong>practical</strong> mental health and wellbeing strategy is the key to improving mental health in the legal sector.<!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->The mental health of legal professionals <strong>CANNOT</strong> improve without the buy-in to proper mental health initiatives from law firms and the active promotion, practice and support of good mental health practices by Partners / the Executive Team.<!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->A fundamental change to long-standing, expected and accepted behaviour in the legal world is required if staff mental health is to improve.<!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph --><strong>That’s the corporate responsibility.</strong><!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
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<h4>Other articles in the <em>Mental Health in the Law</em> series<!-- /wp:heading --></h4>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->Article 1: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-fear-around-mental-health-in-the-legal-world/">The fear around mental health in the legal world</a><!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->Article 2: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-legal-sector-has-a-very-real-mental-health-problem/">The legal sector has a very real mental health problem</a><!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->Article 3: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mental-health-stop-collaborate-and-listen/">Mental Health: Stop, Collaborate & Listen</a><!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->Article 4: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/10-tips-for-lawyers-who-want-to-improve-their-mental-health/">10 Tips for lawyers who want to improve their mental health</a><!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
<p><!-- wp:paragraph -->_______________________________________<!-- /wp:paragraph --></p>
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<p><!-- wp:paragraph --><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/corporate-creative-workshops-seminars/"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/Well-being-workshops-1.jpg" sizes="(max-width: 810px) 100vw, 810px" srcset="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/Well-being-workshops-1.jpg 810w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/Well-being-workshops-1-300x167.png 300w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/Well-being-workshops-1-768x427.png 768w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/Well-being-workshops-1-500x278.png 500w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/Well-being-workshops-1-800x444.png 800w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/Well-being-workshops-1-480x267.png 480w" alt="Well-being Workshops" width="810" height="450" /></a><!-- wp:block {"ref":2513} /--></p>
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</div><p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/law-firms-8-ways-to-improve-your-staff-mental-health/">Law firms: 8 practical ways to improve staff mental health</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<title>10 tips for lawyers who want to improve their mental health</title>
<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/10-tips-for-lawyers-who-want-to-improve-their-mental-health/</link>
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<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
<pubDate>Fri, 28 Aug 2020 05:07:07 +0000</pubDate>
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<description><![CDATA[<p>Is your mental health in need of some improvement? Is your life in need of some proper work-life balance? Click on the latest blog post for some helpful tips to get your life back on track.</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/10-tips-for-lawyers-who-want-to-improve-their-mental-health/">10 tips for lawyers who want to improve their mental health</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>Article 4 of 5 in the <em>Mental Health in the Law</em> series</strong></h5>
<h6 class="wp-block-heading"><em>Co-written by Frieda Levycky, Founder of <a href="http://www.bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>, and Alicia Koch, Founder of <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist</a> </em></h6>
<p>We’ve spent the last three weeks looking at some insightful pieces relating specifically to <strong>mental health in the legal profession</strong>:</p>
<ul class="wp-block-list"><li>The discomfort around the topic of mental health in the legal sector (<a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-fear-around-mental-health-in-the-legal-world/"><strong>Article 1</strong></a>);</li><li>The global statistics proving that the legal sector really does have a mental health problem (<a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-legal-sector-has-a-very-real-mental-health-problem/"><strong>Article 2</strong></a>); and</li><li>The importance of having open and honest conversations around mental health in order to break the associated stigma in the legal world (<strong><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mental-health-stop-collaborate-and-listen/">Art</a><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mental-health-stop-collaborate-and-listen/">icle</a><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mental-health-stop-collaborate-and-listen/"> 3</a></strong>).</li></ul>
<p>Now, it’s important that we also highlight some of the common situations experienced by legal professionals on a daily basis, which often negatively impact on their mental health. As the penultimate topic in this mental health series, we feel it is important to consider astute discussions around steps that can be taken by legal professionals to improve their mental health going forward.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">We’re all different!</h3>
<p>I want to start by saying that every lawyer is different. <em><strong>Every person is different.</strong> </em>Their life experiences are different. Their resilience levels are different. Their coping mechanisms are different. So, a situation which may seem manageable to one lawyer, may well be experienced very differently by another. And the impact on their mental health may differ also. Vastly.</p>
<p>I’ll give you an example.</p>
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<p>I’ve spent my legal career in very alpha-dominated environments: on a trading floor and in private practice. I’m used to dealing with unwanted attention, big tempers and high-pressured, competitive work environments. It doesn’t mean that I’m immune to the negative effects of these, but I have a pretty good coping mechanism in place. One could say that I became accustomed to what those environments entailed. But I also have a personality which has the ability to call someone out when a line has been crossed, and to say ‘no’ when something is not acceptable. And that took some learning.</p>
<p><strong>That isn’t the case for everyone.</strong></p>
<p>With job security (especially now), being so high on the list of priorities for most people, standing up for themselves or asking for help (when they are struggling), is not going to come easily. Instead, the impact of the event is internalised; it conflicts with personal values and morals, and causes more distress for the individual. It is a snow ball waiting to happen. And not in the fun, <em>“do you want to build a snowman</em>” kind of way.</p>
<p>The reason I mention this up front is that some of the situations listed below may seem trivial or part and parcel of being a lawyer. <strong>The <em>“keep quiet and get on with it”</em> mentality.</strong> But we are looking at this through our own lens. It is therefore very subjective. And for you to understand mental health triggers more clearly, we need to start seeing things from multiple perspectives.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">A reminder of what ‘mental health’ really is</h3>
<p>The World Health Organization (<strong>WHO</strong>) defines mental health as:</p>
<p>“<em>a state of well-being in which the individual realizes his or her own abilities, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to his or her community.</em>”</p>
<p>Simply put – mental health is a state of well-being, something which everyone possesses and which can fluctuate from time to time. Naturally. We all experience different levels of mental health throughout our lives (good, mediocre and poor). <em><strong>It’s not static. It’s not constant. And, it is certainly not a weakness.</strong> </em>It is actually part and parcel of simply being a human being. Remember, lawyers are not super human, they are just human.</p>
<p>Poor mental health can manifest in a variety of ways and to varying degrees, including: stress, anxiety, changes in mood / behaviour, erratic thinking, impulsive actions, low self-esteem, feelings of loneliness, insomnia, burnout (and those are just a few of them).</p>
<p>It leaves you drained, emotional, hyper-sensitive (or numb), and to be honest, sometimes, quite teary-eyed. We have all been through it (even if we do not, unfortunately, openly admit it).</p>
<p>But, what situations contribute to these dips in our mental health?</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Common causes of mental health issues in the legal sector</h3>
<p>Seeking to identify every situation which could impact the mental health of an individual would be impossible. As we said, everyone is different and so are their tolerance levels. However, here are some of the more common situations expressed by legal professionals that have taken a toll on their mental and physical health:</p>
<ul class="wp-block-list"><li><strong>Building your own practice area:</strong> Whether that be as an independent legal practitioner, a senior associate creating a business case for partnership, or as an existing partner – there is a constant pressure to bring in regular and/or new business into the firm. The COVID-19 pandemic has merely exacerbated this already stressful dynamic, causing more anxiety, more erratic behaviour and, for many, even more sleepless nights.</li><li><strong>Too much work / too little personal life:</strong> We’ve previously talked about the pressures imposed by the billable hour model and the expectations within firms that staff should be contactable 24/7. There is barely any downtime and this has a knock-on effect to the personal life of individuals. Many lawyers experience fractious home relationships with their partners and children, miss important events, work through holidays and weekends. There is a constant pressure to be 100% percent ‘on’ in everything they do (to basically be Wonder Woman / Superman). It’s no wonder that the proverbial balls get dropped from trying to juggle too much. It’s exhausting!</li><li><strong>Sedentary lifestyles:</strong> When you work long hours, you spend a lot of time sitting at your desk. This often leads to unhealthy eating habits (both to stay awake and sustained), lethargy sets in, the desire to exercise dissipates, and the weight starts to pile on. Client dinners and drinks are also part of the course, fuelling the unhealthy lifestyle even further.</li><li><strong>Inter-office relationships:</strong> With so much time being spent in the office, it’s no wonder that romantic relationships with colleagues form. Sometimes those relationships flourish, but more often than not, they serve as an interim distraction before one party moves on. Needless to say, that daily reminder of the more intimate relationship that once was, can be painful, distracting and in some cases debilitating.</li><li><strong>Toxic work environments:</strong> One of the most common complaints I hear from clients is with regards to unhappy working environments. The insecurities displayed within legal teams can be rife! Jostling for promotions. Competition for work to be seen up the chain. Personality clashes. Bullying. Back-stabbing. Ostracism. If you are on the receiving end of any of the pushback, the office can feel like a mine-field. You remain on tenterhooks all day and then bring the emotional drama home with you at night. A never-ending spiral.</li><li><strong>The ‘-isms’: </strong>Sexism, racism, machoism, chauvinism – the list goes on. I’d love to say these things no longer exist in professional working environments, but they do. And the impact of being treated as an outsider / lesser than, can have a detrimental impact on the mental health of an individual.</li></ul>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">And COVID-19 hasn’t helped matters …</h3>
<p>In many respects, the pandemic has eased (or rather deferred) the negative impact of some of the traditional legal sector scenarios. Fewer people are in the office. More time is spent at home with family. Any negative day-to-day interaction is dispelled. But, the pandemic itself has introduced new stressers into the mix:</p>
<ul class="wp-block-list"><li><strong>Lack of communication</strong> – Whereas some lawyers strive in the home office environment, others struggle with being away from their friends and colleagues. Many worry about the impact that this is having on their legal education and development. Feelings of isolation are common (particularly for those living on their own). Many worry about what others are doing; about being too quiet; about being forgotten.</li><li><strong>Job security</strong> <strong>concerns</strong> – Some legal practices are booming at present (as is always the case in a crisis), but others are not. There is an increased anxiety about meeting targets and covering overheads. As Government-backed plans near their term, concerns around job security are on the rise. Many law firms have already cut their salaries or created innovative ways to manage cashflow issues – but as the economic stress continues – there are increasing concerns around job losses and the knock-on impact this has to family life.</li><li><strong>Troubled relationships –</strong> Strained office relationships have been replaced with strained home relationships. Juggling cleaning, cooking, work, online schooling, zoom calls, an hour of exercise etc., into a workable routine has worked for some, but for others, it’s resulted in heated arguments, more reliance on alcohol, poor communication and, in some cases, the collapse of the relationship altogether.</li><li><strong>Feelings of guilt</strong> – Many individuals are experiencing guilt for a variety of reasons: not being able to visit elderly relatives, struggling to be emotionally available for family members, ignoring their children because they are supposed to be working; overworking because they feel guilty that they haven’t been impacted financially as a result of the pandemic.</li><li><strong>Pressures to return to work</strong> – As the business world opens its physical doors again, many people are experiencing anxiety around returning to the office for fear of catching the virus, (particularly those who live with vulnerable family members) or returning to previously hostile environments.</li></ul>
<p>The list is endless. <em><strong>And, I repeat, different people will experience these scenarios in different ways.</strong></em> Some lawyers have thrived through lockdown – personal relationships have improved, new online relationships have blossomed, work flow has been at an all-time high, many are genuinely excited about getting back into the office and networking again, and feeling that familiar business buzz.</p>
<p>But, for those of you who are struggling with your mental health at the moment, let’s look at some strategies that can help <strong><em>improve your mental health in a healthy, productive and proactive way.</em></strong></p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">So, what can you do to help yourself? Today!</h3>
<p>It’s easy to blame the competitive and demanding legal industry for our mental health problems, but it cannot be held <em>solely</em> responsible. Whereas law firms and corporates have a responsibility to address systemic issues which negatively impact the health of their staff, we too, as individuals, have a responsibility to look after ourselves as best we can (physically, mentally and emotionally).</p>
<p>Practical steps that you can already start doing today include:</p>
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<p><strong>Get to grips with your values</strong> – when was the last time you sat down and identified your core values? Often the struggles we face in life are either because we are not living by our core values or because two or more of our values are in conflict with each other. If this sounds familiar, consider working with me to re-discover your core values and bring your life back into balance. <a href="https://calendly.com/bravingboundaries/discovery-call-30-mins?back=1&month=2020-08">Book a discovery call for more information</a></p>
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<p><strong>Sleep</strong> – poor sleep has been linked to mental health problems such as anxiety and depression. According to <a href="https://www.health.harvard.edu/newsletter_article/sleep-and-mental-health">Harvard Medical School</a>, studies suggest that a good night’s sleep helps foster both mental and emotional resilience, while chronic sleep disruptions set the stage for negative thinking and emotional vulnerability. For professionals, 8 hours sleep may not feel like an option. So, concentrate on quality over quantity. <strong>Block out the blue light.</strong> <a href="https://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/sleep-blue-light#:~:text=Exposure%20to%20all%20colors%20of,melatonin%20that%20makes%20you%20sleepy.">Web MD</a> succinctly describes how blue light (that bright white light emitted by our electronic devices) messes with our body’s ability to prepare for sleep. It blocks a hormone called melatonin that makes us sleepy. So, 30 minutes before bedtime, instead of scrolling through social media and emails (we all do it!), grab a Nicholas Sparkes off the bookshelf and lose yourself in the fictional world.</p>
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<p><strong>Keep active</strong> – lulls in mental health can leave you feeling sluggish and less inclined to exercise but it’s important to try and keep yourself moving. Exercise increases blood flow to the brain and releases endorphins, our body’s own anti-depressant. It also releases other neurotransmitters such as serotonin, which lifts our mood. If you’ve got a sport you love, build it back into your weekly routine. If not, try out something completely new. </p>
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<p><strong>Sing</strong> – yes, gents, you too! There is nothing quite like belting out a good tune to lift your mood! <a href="https://www.billboard.com/articles/news/billboard-lists/9366625/mental-health-month-31-songs-positive-outlook">Here is a list put together by Billboard if you are looking for some positive inspiration</a>. Singing is a natural anti-depressant. Like exercise, it releases endorphins and makes you feel happy. Scientists have also proven that a tiny organ in the ear (the sacculus) responds to the frequencies created by singing. The response creates an immediate sense of pleasure, irrespective of how good or bad your singing is. Watch out Elton John!</p>
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<p><strong>Eat well</strong> – eating foods that are rich in complex carbohydrates, vitamins, minerals, protein, and fatty acids is key to keeping your brain in good working order and therefore improving mental health. Eat regularly throughout the day to maintain a constant blood sugar level and avoid those dreaded sugar crashes. Aim for five portions of fruit and vegetables a day, limit your alcohol intake (as it has a depressant effect on the brain, which can result in a rapid worsening of your mood) and make sure you keep hydrated. We all need a treat now and then, but if your mood is low, improving your diet is a quick and easy area to make improvements.</p>
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<p><strong>Meditate</strong> – I won’t lie. It’s not for everyone. But if you are stressed and are looking for a simple way to take time out from the relentless pace of daily life, then meditation and mindfulness exercises are a great place to start. It can be a challenge to begin with, but free apps such as <a href="https://www.headspace.com/headspace-meditation-app">Headspace</a>, <a href="https://www.simplehabit.com/">Simple Habit</a> and <a href="https://www.oakmeditation.com/">Oak</a> can all help you to train your mind to focus and redirect your thoughts.</p>
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<p><strong>Prioritize priorities</strong> – let’s be honest, yes, work is demanding, but there are successful lawyers and entrepreneurs, with the same number of hours in the day, who manage to have a happy and fulfilling life outside of the office. What secret do they know that you don’t? They make a choice. They have balance. Next time you hear yourself saying: <em><strong>“I just don’t have the time”</strong>, </em>I invite you to consciously stop and ask yourself these three questions: </p>
<ul class="wp-block-list"><li><em>“What am I prioritising here?”</em></li><li><em>“What am I sacrificing?”</em></li><li><em>“Is this the option I want to choose?”</em></li></ul>
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<p><strong>Live within your means</strong> – we live in a world which encourages us to overspend. It’s all well and good wanting to keep up with the Kardashians’, but a decadent lifestyle can handcuff you. By reining back our outgoings, we give ourselves freedom, flexibility and a lot less stress.</p>
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<p><strong>Maintain your external relationships</strong> – invest time and energy in your relationships outside of the office. They matter. When things get tough at work, colleagues can often feel conflicted. It is your friends and family outside of the office who will be your greatest support. So take the time to build and maintain these relationships.</p>
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<p><strong>Seek external support</strong> – coaching, counselling and mentorship services, such as those that can be found at <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/">Braving Boundaries</a>, offer a confidential space to talk and think through any personal difficulties with a trained professional. Many people find it helpful to do this with someone who isn’t a friend or family member.</p>
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<p>And if you need a little more encouragement, try one of these on for size:</p>
<p><em>“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.”</em> ―E.E. Cummings</p>
<p><em>“It is courage, courage, courage, that raises the blood of life to crimson splendor. Live bravely and present a brave front to adversity.” </em>―Horace</p>
<p>And lastly,</p>
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<p>It takes courage and bravery to admit that you are experiencing an issue. It takes courage and bravery to “grow up” and become the person you are meant to be. But it takes even more courage and even more bravery to take a stand for yourself and demand from life the things that you <em>actua</em>lly want. But it is worth it. Because your desires and life goals matter. Not “one day”. But today. “Hell is life drying up”. And that happens when you stay stuck in the same old rut.</p>
<p><strong>So take your first step and prevent a life only half lived. </strong></p>
<p>_______________________________________</p>
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<h4 class="wp-block-heading">Other articles in the mental health in the law series</h4>
<p>Article 1: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-fear-around-mental-health-in-the-legal-world/">The fear around mental health in the legal world</a></p>
<p>Article 2: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-legal-sector-has-a-very-real-mental-health-problem/">The legal sector has a very real mental health problem</a></p>
<p>Article 3: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mental-health-stop-collaborate-and-listen/">Mental Health: Stop, Collaborate & Listen</a></p>
<p>Article 5: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/law-firms-8-ways-to-improve-your-staff-mental-health/">Law firms: 8 practical ways to improve staff mental health</a></p>
<p>_______________________________________</p>
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<p><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" sizes="(max-width: 810px) 100vw, 810px" srcset="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/BASIC-BALANCE.jpg 810w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/BASIC-BALANCE-300x167.png 300w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/BASIC-BALANCE-768x427.png 768w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/BASIC-BALANCE-500x278.png 500w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/BASIC-BALANCE-800x444.png 800w, https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/BASIC-BALANCE-480x267.png 480w" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/BASIC-BALANCE.jpg" alt=""></p>
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<div class="wp-block-button"><a class="wp-block-button__link has-white-color has-text-color has-background no-border-radius" href="" style="background-color:#27281d" target="_blank" rel="https://bravingboundaries.com/work-with-me/individual-coaching/ noopener">BOOK YOUR BASIC BALANCE SESSION</a></div>
</div>
<p>_______________________________________</p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist-1024x1024-1.jpg" alt=""/></figure>
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<p>About the Co-author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong></p>
<p>Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism. </p>
<p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>.</p>
<p><strong>Email: [email protected] </strong></p>
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</div><p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/10-tips-for-lawyers-who-want-to-improve-their-mental-health/">10 tips for lawyers who want to improve their mental health</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<title>Mental Health: Stop, Collaborate and Listen</title>
<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/mental-health-stop-collaborate-and-listen/</link>
<comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/mental-health-stop-collaborate-and-listen/#comments</comments>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
<pubDate>Tue, 18 Aug 2020 05:10:00 +0000</pubDate>
<category><![CDATA[Lawyer Life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[work-life balance]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[attorney life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[attorneys]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[big law]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[big law life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[climbing the corporate ladder]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[good mental health]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[junior lawyer]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[law]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[law life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[law recruiters]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[law students]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[lawyer life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[lawyer tips]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[lawyers]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[legal firm life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[legal life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[legal professionals]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[legal recruiter]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[legal recruitment]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[legal secretaries]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[legal world]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental health advocate]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental health awareness]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental health matters]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental wellbeing]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental wellness]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[self care]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[self-care]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[stop the stigma]]></category>
<guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/the-legal-sector-has-a-very-real-mental-health-problem-copy/</guid>
<description><![CDATA[<p>Read about the interview Frieda Levycky, Founder of Braving Boundaries, had with Rob Green, CEO of GRM, about mental health in the legal sector. IT'S TIME TO STOP THE STIGMA!</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mental-health-stop-collaborate-and-listen/">Mental Health: Stop, Collaborate and Listen</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
]]></description>
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<h5 class="wp-block-heading" id="article-3-of-5-in-the-mental-health-in-the-law-series"><strong>Article 3 of 5 in the <em>Mental Health in the Law</em> series</strong></h5>
<h1 class="wp-block-heading" id="mental-health-stop-collaborate-and-listen">Mental Health: Stop, Collaborate and Listen</h1>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="introduction">Introduction</h3>
<p>There is something beautifully refreshing about people talking openly about mental health in the <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-legal-sector-has-a-very-real-mental-health-problem/">legal sector</a>. Particularly their own experiences. Particularly men.</p>
<p>Last month, I had the pleasure of sitting down with <strong>Rob Green, CEO of <a href="https://www.grm.global/">GRM</a>,</strong> an international legal recruitment and research firm, to talk about mental health in the law.</p>
<p>The podcast will form part of GRM’s new, subscription-based portal called <strong>GLC</strong> or <strong>Global Legal Career </strong>which will formally launch in September 2020 (see further details about GLC below).</p>
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<iframe loading="lazy" title="GLC GRM Podcast, Frieda Levycky, Mental Health" width="1080" height="608" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/H4PA69BvZW4?feature=oembed" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="stopping-the-stigma-around-mental-health">Stopping the stigma around mental health</h3>
<p>To be honest, when Rob asked me if I would be keen to be interviewed about mental health in the legal sector, I was pleasantly surprised. For those that don’t know Rob, he’s a former rugby player: strong, tall and confident – no one is going to mess with him.</p>
<p>Not exactly the image of someone I expected would want to discuss mental health matters in a public forum.</p>
<p>The thing is though, when you’ve had the courage:</p>
<ul class="wp-block-list"><li>to acknowledge and address your own health issues (both physical and mental),</li><li>to see the impact work stress is having on other areas of your life,</li><li>to talk the issues through with someone</li><li>to take steps to change your work habits to create more balance in your life, and</li><li>to now live a life you love,</li></ul>
<p>you understand the importance of talking about mental health issues openly.</p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/stop-the-stigma-5-1024x311.png" alt="stop the stigma"/></figure>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="addressing-mental-health-issues-in-the-legal-sector">Addressing mental health issues in the legal sector</h3>
<p>The interview itself provides an interesting spin on mental health issues which affect legal professionals across the board (Business Development professionals, legal secretaries, recruiters etc.) – <strong>not just lawyers</strong>.</p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/interview-with-Rob.jpg" alt="mental health in the law interview - Rob Green GRM"/></figure>
<p><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H4PA69BvZW4"><br> </a></p>
<p>Rob, as a legal recruiter and a service provider to law firms and corporate legal teams alike, and me, as a lawyer and coach for legal professionals, have experienced the legal sector from a variety of angles.</p>
<p>We’ve seen and, in some cases, experienced, a variety of incidents which have caused poor mental health issues in the legal sector to surface (for example, disregard for legal recruitment, bullying, <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/workplace-ostracism-addressing-the-intangible-office-bully/">ostracism</a>, over-work, harassment, under-valuing business development, lack of respect etc.).</p>
<p>Our combined 40 years of international legal experience is brought to the table in the interview.</p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/stop-the-stigma-4-1024x311-1.jpg" alt="stop the stigma - mental health"/></figure>
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<p>Being interviewed by Rob was an absolute joy! We touched on a range of topics including:</p>
<ul class="wp-block-list"><li>what mental health actually is</li><li>how poor mental health manifests (e.g. stress, insomnia, chronic fatigue, anxiety, depression etc)</li><li>examples of situations which may have an impact on a lawyer’s mental health (pre- and post-COVID-19), both personal and professional</li><li>our own experiences with poor mental health and how we turned things around</li><li>some tips to bolster your mental health whilst working in the legal sector</li><li>some thoughts about the pressures likely to impact the legal sector following lock-down</li></ul>
<p>We ended up recording for 3 hours – there was so much to talk about (and boy, can we talk!) – but, the <a href="http://soundcast.co.za/">Soundcast</a> team worked their magic and cut us down to 90 minutes – a much more manageable listen for you – our audience.</p>
<p><strong>Click on the link below to listen to the discussion.</strong></p>
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<iframe loading="lazy" title="GLC GRM Podcast, Frieda Levycky, Mental Health" width="1080" height="608" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/H4PA69BvZW4?feature=oembed" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="what-to-do-if-you-are-struggling-with-your-mental-health-currently">What to do if you are struggling with your mental health currently</h3>
<p>First of all, I want to let you know that there is nothing to be ashamed about. As we mentioned in the first of our articles this month: <em><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-fear-around-mental-health-in-the-legal-world/">The fear around mental health in the legal world</a></em>, we all experience different levels of mental health throughout our lives (good, mediocre and poor). <strong>It’s not static. It’s not constant. It is certainly not a weakness.</strong></p>
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<figure class="wp-block-image"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/MG_4218-683x1024.jpg" alt="Frieda Levycky - Life coach for lawyers"/></figure>
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<p>Poor mental health can manifest in a variety of ways and to varying degrees, including: stress, anxiety, changes in mood / behaviour, erratic thinking, impulsive actions, low self-esteem, feelings of loneliness, insomnia, burnout (those are just a few).</p>
<p>It leaves you drained, emotional, hyper-sensitive or numb, and to be honest, sometimes, quite teary-eyed.</p>
<p><strong>Nothing feels under control. </strong><strong style="font-size: 15px;">Nothing feels balanced.</strong></p>
<p>You know this isn’t healthy for you, but often there seems to be very little option to change the status quo, without causing further damage to other areas of your life. <em><strong>Where do you even start?</strong></em></p>
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<h4 class="wp-block-heading" id="here-are-a-couple-of-options"><strong>Here are a couple of options:</strong></h4>
<p><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/bring-back-balance/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">BRING BACK BALANCE</a></p>
<p><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/work-with-me/individual-coaching/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">1-TO-1 COACHING</a></p>
<p>What is the point of being a successful lawyer, if it’s costing you your health and happiness? </p>
<p>You’ve worked hard to create this standard of life, so let’s help you start living and loving it by bringing some balance back between the professional and the personal.<b> </b></p>
<p>If you’re at the point where enough is enough, you want to start living a personal and professional life you genuinely love (you’ve worked hard enough for it), and want support in making the necessary changes, that’s where I come in.</p>
<p><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/book-a-call/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Book a discovery session</a>. Let’s have a chat, see if we are a good fit, and pull a plan together to quash those limiting beliefs and enable you to live a happier, healthier and more fulfilling life, both inside and outside the office.</p>
<p>_______________________________________</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading" id="a-little-more-about-global-legal-career">A little more about Global Legal Career</h3>
<p>As I mentioned above, in September 2020, GRM is launching a new, subscription-based portal called <strong>GLC </strong>or <strong>Global Legal Career</strong>.</p>
<p>For a small monthly fee, the legal community around the world will be able to access webcasts, podcasts, research papers, CV and cover letter templates and interview assistance through the online GLC platform. In addition, users can practise mock video interviews, attend career guidance webinars, and book one-on-one sessions with legal market career specialists and receive updates of the latest global job openings.</p>
<p>Users will also be able to showcase their skills and meet other members of the community, from around the world, who can help facilitate new career paths and global mobility, and much much more. Needless to say, mental health awareness in the legal sector will be a topic which will be showcased through the GLC platform.</p>
<p>_______________________________________</p>
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<h5 class="wp-block-heading" id="other-articles-in-the-mental-health-in-the-law-series">Other articles in the <em>Mental Health in the Law</em> series</h5>
<p>Article 1: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-fear-around-mental-health-in-the-legal-world/">The fear around mental health in the legal world</a></p>
<p>Article 2: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-legal-sector-has-a-very-real-mental-health-problem/">The legal sector has a very real mental health problem</a></p>
<p>Article 4: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/10-tips-for-lawyers-who-want-to-improve-their-mental-health/">10 Tips for lawyers who want to improve their mental health</a></p>
<p>Article 5: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/law-firms-8-ways-to-improve-your-staff-mental-health/">Law firms: 8 practical ways to improve staff mental health</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mental-health-stop-collaborate-and-listen/">Mental Health: Stop, Collaborate and Listen</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<title>The legal sector has a very real mental health problem</title>
<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-legal-sector-has-a-very-real-mental-health-problem/</link>
<comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-legal-sector-has-a-very-real-mental-health-problem/#respond</comments>
<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
<pubDate>Sun, 09 Aug 2020 02:10:04 +0000</pubDate>
<category><![CDATA[Lawyer Life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[attorney life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[attorneys]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[big law]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[big law life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[climbing the corporate ladder]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[good mental health]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[law]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[law life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[law students]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[lawyer life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[lawyer tips]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[lawyers]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[legal firm life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[legal life]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[legal world]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental health advocate]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental health awareness]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental health matters]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental wellbeing]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[mental wellness]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[self care]]></category>
<category><![CDATA[stop the stigma]]></category>
<guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/the-fear-around-mental-health-in-the-legal-world-copy/</guid>
<description><![CDATA[<p>If you ever doubted that the legal sector had a mental health problem, it’s time to look at the statistics. Click here to read the latest blog by guest writer Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-legal-sector-has-a-very-real-mental-health-problem/">The legal sector has a very real mental health problem</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
]]></description>
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<h5 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>Article 2 of 5 in the <em>Mental Health in the Law</em> series</strong></h5>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">THE LEGAL SECTOR HAS A VERY REAL MENTAL HEALTH PROBLEM</h2>
<h6 class="wp-block-heading"><em>An article by Alicia Koch, Founder of <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist</a> </em></h6>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Introduction</h3>
<p>Let’s start off with some sobering facts:</p>
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<p>In the <strong>United States</strong>, the 2016 <a href="https://www.americanbar.org/">American Bar Association</a> together with the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation in a study of attorneys (see “<em>Studies on Well-Being in the Profession</em>”) underscored mental health concerns in the legal profession. Of the attorneys surveyed: <strong style="font-size: 15px;">28%</strong> reported experiencing symptoms of <strong style="font-size: 15px;">depression</strong>, <strong style="font-size: 15px;">19%</strong> reported symptoms of <strong style="font-size: 15px;">anxiety</strong>, <strong style="font-size: 15px;">23%</strong> experienced symptoms of <strong style="font-size: 15px;">stress</strong> and <strong style="font-size: 15px;">21%</strong> qualified as <strong style="font-size: 15px;">problem drinkers.</strong></p>
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<p>In the <strong>United Kingdom</strong>, <a href="https://www.lawcare.org.uk/">LawCare</a> revealed that: <strong style="font-size: 15px;">26%</strong> of all lawyers that called into their helpline were suffering from <strong style="font-size: 15px;">stress</strong>, <strong style="font-size: 15px;">12%</strong> were suffering from bullying and a further <strong style="font-size: 15px;">12%</strong> of all callers suffered from <strong style="font-size: 15px;">depression</strong>.</p>
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<p>In a further article titled <a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2019-08-15/study-finds-high-rates-anxiety-depression-in-legal-profession/11412832">Lawyers experience high rates of anxiety and depression</a>, it was found that in <strong>Australia and New Zealand</strong> that – <em>“A survey of 200 legal professionals across Australia and New Zealand revealed a high percentage of employees at small and medium-sized law firms had experienced depression and stress in the workplace. An overwhelming <strong>85 per cent</strong> of respondents said they had experienced <strong>anxiety</strong>, or knew someone close to them in the workplace who had. More than <strong>60 per cent</strong> of respondents said they had experienced <strong>depression</strong>, or knew someone close to them in the workplace who had”.</em></p>
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<p>And lastly in <strong>South Africa</strong>, the South African Depression and Anxiety Group (“<a href="http://www.sadag.org/"><em>SADAG</em></a>”) has revealed that one in every five people will suffer from a mental illness. Every 24-hours in South Africa, 22 people commit suicide and 220 people attempt suicide. 9.5% of teen deaths are due to suicide. SADAG’s research has also revealed that employees are taking more than 18 days off work due to depression but are reluctant to disclose depression as a reason for sick leave due to the stigma associated with the condition. <strong><em>The statistics around lawyer specific mental health concerns have yet to be quantified.</em> </strong>And that is a scary thing considering the stigma that is currently attached with mental health issues.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Stopping the stigma</h3>
<p>Mental health is always spoken about in hushed tones and usually behind closed doors. As if it is something to be ashamed of. But, why?</p>
<p>There is nothing weak about mental health. As we discussed in last week’s article: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-fear-around-mental-health-in-the-legal-world/">The fear about mental health in the legal world</a> – we all have a level of mental health and that level of health (as with our physical health) fluctuates over time.</p>
<p>So why does the term “<em><strong>mental</strong></em>” trigger such awkwardness and discomfort in so many of us?</p>
<p>Perhaps our youth has something to do with it?</p>
<p>Growing up, the slang term <a href="https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=mental">“mental”</a> was used quite often. When you heard that a party was “mental”, you automatically assumed that it was wild and that things got out of hand. Similarly, if someone were to call another person “mental”, you immediately kept your distance at the connotation that the person was, in fact, crazy (not that we were qualified to ascertain anyone’s state of mind).</p>
<p>But the actual definition of ‘mental’ is nothing sinister – it literally means <em><strong>“related to the mind”</strong>.</em> However, when you put the words mental and health together, we are lead to something far more complex, far more important, but sadly, less spoken about.</p>
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<p><em><strong>Isn’t it time to reshape how we, as a society, view mental health and the associated issues? Especially in the legal profession.</strong></em></p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Perception of the legal industry</h3>
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<p>I have one image for you – a suit. Picture Harvey Specter in his expensive designer suit, working late into the night demanding excellence in everything he does. And from everyone he works with. And now picture someone you know who is exactly like this. I bet someone popped into your head almost immediately. Maybe it was yourself.</p>
<p>The sad reality is, this is how the general public believe legal professionals are <em>supposed</em> to act. Never mind how junior lawyers<em> expect</em> themselves to act. And this expectation continues long into most legal professional’s lives.</p>
<p>Truthfully, we can all agree that this image of absolute strength and perfection is exactly how lawyers are represented in mainstream media – workaholics, perfectionists (and we touch on this subject in <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-perfectionist-problem/">The Perfectionist Problem</a>), practitioners with meticulous attention to detail, rational and invulnerable to stress.</p>
<p><em><strong>Basically assumed to be bullet proof. </strong></em></p>
<p><em><strong>Almost superhuman. </strong></em></p>
<p>And society, generally, does not consider how legal professionals may <em>in reality</em> be affected by the work they do. Neither do the lawyers themselves. At least, they would never admit to being affected by their work out loud. And this is an impossible standard.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">What is mental health?</h3>
<p>According to <a href="https://www.mentalhealth.gov/basics/what-is-mental-health">Mental Health.gov</a>, a person’s mental health refers to their <em>“emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It affects how we think, feel, and act”</em>.</p>
<p>And in the legal profession, a person’s emotional, psychological and social well-being is not (very often) considered to be top of mind. We are taught to believe that you need to <strong><em>“get on with it”</em></strong>. <strong><em>Harden up. Have thicker skin.</em> </strong>At least, that’s what I was told. Often.</p>
<p>The workplace, especially in law firms, is no place for sensitivity. But is being affected by something necessarily just being sensitive? And even if you are sensitive, does that mean there is no place for you in a law firm? That shouldn’t be the case. And yet, as we are constantly lead to believe, seemingly is. At least on the face of it.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">The reality of mental health in the legal industry</h3>
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<p>An overwhelming majority of legal professionals believe their mental well-being is worse off as a result of their chosen career, an <a href="https://www.law.com/2020/02/19/by-the-numbers-the-state-of-mental-health-in-the-legal-industry/">in-depth Mental Health and Substance Abuse survey</a> of law firm lawyers and staff suggests.</p>
<p>But, that’s only the tip of the iceberg. There are far more alarming articles and studies to illustrate the above statement.</p>
<p>In an article titled <a href="https://thepractice.law.harvard.edu/article/it-is-time-to-normalize-mental-health-check-ups/">It is Time to Normalize Mental Health Check-Ups</a>, they state that mental health has become a critical issue –</p>
<p><em>“Mental health has become a significant topic of discussion and study for legal professionals as of late, and for good reason. Mental health has a critical impact on the general population—in 2018 alone, 47.6 million adults in the United States experienced symptoms that met criteria for a diagnosable mental illness. This equates to 19.1 percent of the population, or one in five adults. Further, depression is the leading cause of disability worldwide.</em></p>
<p><em>Findings further suggest that <strong>legal professionals may experience mental health issues at a rate higher than other adults in the United States</strong>. This, along with several recent deaths of legal professionals by suicide, have sparked a long-overdue conversation about mental wellness in the legal community.”</em></p>
<p>Similarly, in an article titled <a href="https://www.leadersleague.com/en/news/mental-health-in-the-legal-industry-it-s-time-to-take-action">Mental Health in the Legal Industry: It’s Time to Take Action</a>, they state the following –</p>
<p><em>“According to the World Health Organization (<strong>WHO</strong>), more than 300 million people are estimated to suffer from depression globally. Around the world, close to 800 000 people die due to suicide often caused by depression every year. And the legal industry is not immune. </em></p>
<p><em>A study conducted by Johns Hopkins University on the issue suggests that the prevalence of depression is closely related to a person’s professional occupation. Accordingly, <strong>lawyers are 3.6 times more likely on average to suffer from depression as people in other professions</strong>.”</em></p>
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<p>In a further American article titled <a href="https://www.law.com/2020/02/19/by-the-numbers-the-state-of-mental-health-in-the-legal-industry/">By the Numbers: The State of Mental Health in the Legal Industry</a>, they found that <em>“<strong>31.2% of more than 3,800 respondents feel they are depressed, 64% feel they have anxiety, 10.1% feel they have an alcohol problem and 2.8% feel they have a drug problem</strong>.”</em></p>
<p>Lastly in an article titled <a href="https://www.lawgazette.co.uk/wellbeing/moving-mental-health-to-the-top-of-the-legal-agenda/5104324.article">Moving mental health to the top of the legal agenda</a>, they refer to a study that states that –</p>
<p><em>“According to research carried out by Dr Rebecca Michalak of the University of Queensland: <strong>‘Lawyers suffer from significantly lower levels of psychological and psychosomatic health wellbeing than other professionals’.</strong> Add to this a global pandemic threatening the lives of loved ones, job insecurity and economic instability</em>, <em>and we have a rather large melting pot ready to explode.”</em></p>
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<p>In the above-mentioned article –</p>
<p><em>“According to Mental Health First Aid England over 80% of managers admit to prejudice against employees struggling with their mental health and only about 20% of companies provide training to managers around the subject. I dare say, law firms lag behind in the main. In fact, I recently asked a senior partner from a Magic Circle firm what they do to support mental health and she responded: <strong>‘Driven people like us don’t suffer with those sort of issues’.</strong> Sadly, this couldn’t be further from the truth. Though many efforts of engagement within the legal profession have been reported, particularly during this particular crisis, there is still a long way to go and the profession must not lose sight of this”.</em></p>
<p>But, admitting concerns over your mental health is not a sign of weakness or inability. This is an antiquated notion that needs to change. And quickly.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">So how does your work affect you?</h3>
<p>In an article titled <a href="https://theconversation.com/the-legal-profession-has-a-mental-health-problem-which-is-an-issue-for-everyone-113224">The legal profession has a mental health problem – which is an issue for everyone</a>, a study was conducted in which legal professionals discussed how their work affects them –</p>
<p><em>”Participants have disclosed a number of issues which they felt had arisen from their work, including</em> <em>experiencing high levels of stress or witnessing it in others.</em></p>
<p><em>For example, they often speak about the long hours they do, the high billing requirements they have, their large caseloads and the negative effect that these have on them. They also speak of the alienating cultures in which they work and which put them in competition with their colleagues.</em></p>
<p><em>Many practitioners also speak directly of how the cultures of some legal environments mean that well-being is often not a concern. The focus for many law firms is on fee earning, growth and productivity. Well-being is therefore viewed as irrelevant. For example, practitioners have told us that there is a culture of “you have got to get on with it” when dealing with stressful or emotionally demanding work.</em></p>
<p><em>Some have suggested that there is a stigma within the profession with regards to mental health and that highlighting well-being issues could be perceived as a sign of weakness and become a barrier to promotion. Participants have also discussed a traditional lack of investment into supporting the mental health of lawyers.</em></p>
<p><em>Other lawyers have told us about the negative impacts of working with traumatised individuals, hearing traumatic narratives, or working with distressing evidence – for example, material evidence relating to serious crimes or road traffic accidents. Some have discussed the lasting effect that some cases had on them because of their distressing nature.”</em></p>
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<p>And I am certain that many of you reading this article can relate to some (if not all) of the issues listed in the above article –</p>
<ul class="wp-block-list"><li>long hours</li><li>always being on call and unable to disconnect</li><li>high billing requirements</li><li>high caseloads</li><li>competition between colleagues</li><li>a culture of “get on with it”</li><li>impacts of traumatic cases on your well-being.</li></ul>
<p>All leading to high stress levels, anxiety, depression, burn-out and in some cases substance abuse.</p>
<p>It is evidently not an experience limited to certain parts of the world. It is a feeling felt globally in the legal profession. <strong><em>A pandemic, if you will.</em></strong> And it needs to be addressed. More importantly, legal professionals need to feel comfortable enough to be able to speak about their personal concerns around their own mental health. Freely and openly.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Where to from here?</h3>
<p>We are starting to see many firms take a more proactive approach to managing mental health providing access to services such as coaching, counselling, mental health first aiders and employee assistance programmes (<strong>EAPs</strong>), to support individuals with mental health issues. Areas that impact mental health such as financial wellbeing, diet, alcohol intake and sleep and developing programmes to address these specific issues are also becoming top of mind.</p>
<p>An organization such as <a href="https://www.lawcare.org.uk/">LawCare</a> in the UK, promotes and supports good mental health and wellbeing in the legal community. In an article titled <a href="https://blogs.thomsonreuters.com/legal-uk/2018/05/02/the-mental-health-stigma-how-the-legal-industry-is-responding/">The mental health stigma: how the legal industry is responding</a>, they state that whilst awareness around mental health has increased dramatically in recent years, the legal industry still faces challenges –</p>
<p><em>“Meanwhile, statistics revealed by the charity LawCare, highlighted that calls from lawyers to its helpline has reached a ‘record high’. The charity received nearly 900 calls last year from 616 callers – representing an 11 percent rise compared to 2016. Nearly half of the solicitors and barristers who called in for help cited <strong>depression (17 percent)</strong> and <strong>workplace stress (27 percent)</strong> as the reason. Other problems included disciplinary concerns, anxiety, and bereavement, financial problems, bullying and harassment, chronic illness, alcohol and drugs, career development and relationship issues.</em></p>
<p><em>Elizabeth Rimmer, CEO of LawCare, said the growing number of calls to the helpline is rising every year and is showing no sign of abating. “Life in the law can be challenging. Long hours, a competitive environment, heavy workload and pressure to meet billing targets can contribute to stress and mental health issues”, said Rimmer”.</em></p>
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<p>Law societies around the world are starting to recognise the alarming trends facing the legal profession today, with decisive steps being taken to address mental health in the workplace. For example in the UK, <em>“</em><a href="https://www.lawcare.org.uk/news/legal-professions-wellbeing-taskforce-roundtable-event#:~:text=The%20Legal%20Professions%20Wellbeing%20Taskforce%20is%20a%20cross%2Dprofession%20taskforce,wellbeing%20across%20the%20legal%20community."><em>The Legal Professions Wellbeing Taskforce</em></a><em>” </em>has been established to promote and support mental health and well-being in the legal community.</p>
<p>So whilst progression around mental health issues is relatively slow in the legal profession, at least there is a shift in the right direction, providing some light at the end of the tunnel.</p>
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<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Final thoughts for today</h3>
<p>Now more than ever before, as people navigate their way through the emotional trauma, stress, anxiety and depression arising from the Covid-19 pandemic, there seems to be a clearer understanding of how these traumas can negatively impact the lives of both themselves as well as those around them. How these traumas can materially affect their mental health.</p>
<p>For some people, it is the first time that they have been ready to admit, out loud, that they are suffering from some kind of mental health issue. <strong>And that is progress.</strong></p>
<p>Perhaps as we start with the healing process following the pandemic, we should use this new knowledge to continue encouraging people (and businesses) to talk freely and openly about mental health in the work place. Pivot off of it – make policies, protect people, encourage discussion and promote overall mental wellbeing.</p>
<p>Wouldn’t it be nice if the phrase <em><strong>“are you mental?”</strong></em> was no longer associated with negative connotations that are currently invoked when hearing the phrase, but rather that <em><strong>“are you mental?” quite simply meant, – is your mental health ok?</strong></em></p>
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<p>This thought-provoking and heartfelt article was written by <strong>Alicia Koch</strong>, <strong>Founder of The Legal Belletrist</strong>.</p>
<p>Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism. </p>
<p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>.</p>
<p><strong>Email: [email protected] </strong></p>
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<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>FOR LAW FIRMS / CORPORATES</strong></h4>
<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>FOR INDIVIDUAL LEGAL PROFESSIONALS</strong></h4>
<p>If you are interested in or responsible for bringing greater awareness around mental health to your law firm / corporate, let’s work together to create a bespoke workshop or webinar for your staff. </p>
<p>If you are a legal professional struggling with your mental health at the moment, give me a shout. Let me help you to reduce that stress so that you can start living and loving your life, both professionally and personally.</p>
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<h5 class="wp-block-heading">Other articles in the <em>Mental Health in the Law</em> series</h5>
<p>Article 1: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-fear-around-mental-health-in-the-legal-world/">The fear around mental health in the legal world</a></p>
<p>Article 3: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mental-health-stop-collaborate-and-listen/">Mental Health: Stop, Collaborate & Listen</a></p>
<p>Article 4: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/10-tips-for-lawyers-who-want-to-improve-their-mental-health/">10 Tips for lawyers who want to improve their mental health</a></p>
<p>Article 5: <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/law-firms-8-ways-to-improve-your-staff-mental-health/">Law Firms: 8 practical ways to improve staff mental health</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-legal-sector-has-a-very-real-mental-health-problem/">The legal sector has a very real mental health problem</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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