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		<title>The Messy Middle: Why Self-Awareness Feels Hard</title>
		<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-messy-middle-why-self-awareness-feels-hard/</link>
					<comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-messy-middle-why-self-awareness-feels-hard/#respond</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 25 Apr 2026 15:59:06 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Change]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Finding direction and purpose]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Personal Growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Career Growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[confidence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Emotional intelligence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[executive coaching]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[high achievers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leadership Development]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mindset]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[personal growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[professionals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-awareness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Workplace Communication]]></category>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-messy-middle-why-self-awareness-feels-hard/">The Messy Middle: Why Self-Awareness Feels Hard</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></strong><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></h5>
<p><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></p>
<p class="p1"><i>Many professionals look successful on the outside while feeling stuck, reactive or disconnected on the inside. This article explores why self-awareness can feel uncomfortable, why growth often gets messy before it gets better and how honest reflection and boundaries can lead to stronger leadership, healthier relationships and lasting change.</i></p>
<p class="p1">Hello, my fellow high functioning, &#8220;bulletproof&#8221; professionals. Let’s have a seat – metaphorically speaking, of course, because standing makes it easier to flee when things get too real. If you’re reading this, you’ve likely survived another week of pretending you have it all together while your internal monologue is a chaotic mix of a business strategy and a silent scream into the vast, empty void.</p>
<p class="p1">In the world of Braving Boundaries, we’re diving into self-awareness (catch up on more posts about <a class="underline underline underline-offset-2 decoration-1 decoration-current/40 hover:decoration-current focus:decoration-current" href="https://bravingboundaries.com/category/change-2/">boundaries and change</a>). But we aren&#8217;t doing the &#8220;sparkly Pinterest quote&#8221; version where you find your inner light while wearing linen pants on a beach. No. We’re doing the version that feels like finding a cockroach in your designer handbag &#8211; shocking, slightly nauseating, somewhat curious and utterly impossible to unsee.<strong></strong></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Why most people think they are self-aware</strong></h2></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img fetchpriority="high" decoding="async" width="1249" height="937" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Woman-Looking-at-Her-Reflection-in-a-Broken-Mirror-View-more-by-Artmim-from-Getty-Images.jpg" alt="Woman Looking at Her Reflection in a Broken Mirror View more by Artmim from Getty Images" title="Woman Looking at Her Reflection in a Broken Mirror View more by Artmim from Getty Images" class="wp-image-235651" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">Before we get personal, let’s look at the numbers. They’re deliciously, darkly grim. According to research by organisational psychologist <a href="https://tashaeurich.com/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1">Dr. Tasha Eurich</span></a>, 95% of people believe they are self-aware. We all think we’re the hero of the story, the &#8220;self-actualised&#8221; leader, the person who &#8220;gets it&#8221;.</p>
<p class="p1">It makes us feel good about our own existential crises.</p>
<p class="p1">However, the reality is a cold bucket of water &#8211; only <b>10% to 15% of people actually meet the criteria</b>. That’s a cold hard reality smack to the face if you ask me. Ego bruised and our perfectly curated delusion smashed like Avo on toast.</p>
<p class="p1">That means about 85% of the people you meet today &#8211; your boss, your spouse, the person cutting you off in traffic &#8211; are walking around in a cloud of blissful, dangerous ignorance. They are unknowingly stepping on toes, alienating colleagues and repeating the same three mistakes like a glitching NPC in a video game.</p>
<p class="p1">If you currently feel uncomfortable, itchy in your own skin or suddenly unsure of your &#8220;vibe&#8221;, congratulations! You’ve likely stumbled out of the delusional 95% and into the &#8220;Messy Middle&#8221;.</p>
<p class="p1">Just like Neo you took the red pill and now there’s no going back. It’s a cramped, confusing place with terrible snacks, but at least the lighting is more honest. Eeeuw! Overhead lighting. I look far better in dimly lit rooms &#8211; you know &#8211; with “atmosphere” and intrigue.</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The professional mask high-achievers wear</strong></h2></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="1250" height="937" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Woman-leading-a-business-presentation-at-a-conference-event-View-more-by-Jacob-Lund-Photography-from-Jacob-Lund.jpg" alt="Woman leading a business presentation at a conference event View more by Jacob Lund Photography from Jacob Lund" title="Woman leading a business presentation at a conference event View more by Jacob Lund Photography from Jacob Lund" class="wp-image-235650" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">As someone who has spent years perfecting the art of being &#8220;bulletproof&#8221; (albeit with a very chic bulletproof vest), I know the struggle. In the professional world, we’re taught that admitting a struggle is a death sentence for your reputation. We wear our high-functioning anxiety like a tailored blazer &#8211; it’s stiff, it’s expensive and it hides the fact that we can’t breathe. Almost like a corset, without the fabulous figure-hugging silhouette.</p>
<p class="p1">I remember a specific season of my life where I thought I was being &#8220;assertive, clear and efficient&#8221;. I was the hero of my own corporate thriller &#8211; fearless, climbing mountains, swimming with metaphorical mermaids. Mermaids exist, ok? Then, a &#8220;loving critic&#8221; (someone who actually likes me but doesn&#8217;t mind watching me squirm for my own good) pointed out that my &#8220;clear communication&#8221; actually felt like a deposition to everyone else in the room.</p>
<p class="p1">Shock! Horror!</p>
<p class="p1">They told me that when I entered a meeting, people didn&#8217;t feel &#8220;led&#8221;, they felt &#8220;interrogated&#8221;. As if! I&#8217;m a delight.</p>
<p class="p1">That moment of awareness didn’t feel like a &#8220;breakthrough&#8221;. It didn’t feel like a weight that was lifted off my shoulders. It felt like abject humiliation. It felt like I’d been walking around with spinach in my teeth for a decade while giving speeches on dental hygiene. This is the <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-ghost-in-the-corner-office-grieving-the-life-you-thought-youd-have/"><span class="s1">&#8220;Ghost in the Corner Office&#8221;</span></a> (see last month’s article) &#8211; the jarring tension between who we thought we were and who we actually are.</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The Anatomy of Corporate Purgatory</strong></h2></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="1250" height="937" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Aerial-View-of-a-Green-Hedge-Maze-View-more-by-meydiiqbal-from-Gambar-Iqbal-Meidi-hapsal.jpg" alt="Aerial View of a Green Hedge Maze View more by meydiiqbal from Gambar Iqbal Meidi hapsal" title="Aerial View of a Green Hedge Maze View more by meydiiqbal from Gambar Iqbal Meidi hapsal" class="wp-image-235655" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">This brings us to the broader realisation &#8211; the Messy Middle isn&#8217;t just about your personality. It’s about the work itself. It’s that distinctive, agonising stretch of time where the initial adrenaline of &#8220;Innovation!&#8221; has evaporated, replaced by the realisation that you’re now professionally obligated to see this through to the bitter end.</p>
<p class="p1">In the beginning, everything was beautiful. You had a slide deck with high-resolution stock photos of people pointing at glass walls. You had a budget that hadn’t been reduced by a round of unforeseen integration costs.</p>
<p class="p1">You had <i>hope</i>.</p>
<p class="p1">But now? You are in the thick of it. The &#8220;vision&#8221; has been replaced by a spreadsheet with 47 tabs, and the only thing &#8220;disrupting&#8221; your industry is your own rising blood pressure and a caffeine habit that would concern a cardiologist.</p>
<p class="p1">The Messy Middle is the phase where reality finally catches up to your ambition and demands its pound of flesh. In the business world, this is often misdiagnosed as &#8220;poor planning&#8221;. In reality, it’s simply the point where the complexity of a task finally outweighs the novelty of starting it.</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Why growth often feels worse before it feels better</strong></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">We’ve been sold a lie that personal and professional growth is a linear, upward trajectory. We think it’s &#8211; <i>Ignorance </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> Epiphany </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> Success.</i></p>
<p class="p1">Wrong!</p>
<p class="p1">In reality, the process of self-awareness looks much more like &#8211; <i>Ignorance </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> Horrified Realisation </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> Existential Crisis </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> The Messy Middle </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> Tiny Bit of Clarity </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> More Horrified Realisation.</i></p>
<p class="p1">It’s so fun!</p>
<p class="p1">Increased self-awareness and project maturity bring discomfort because they destabilise your internal status quo.</p>
<p class="p1">But here are some reasons why it may feel like you’re failing when you’re actually winning &#8211;</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>The Death of the Avatar &#8211; </strong>you have to kill the &#8220;Professional Avatar&#8221; you built &#8211; the one that’s never flustered and always has the answer. Letting it go feels like mourning. But it’s so very freeing.</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>The Feedback Loop of Doom &#8211;</strong> real progress requires external feedback. Hearing that your &#8220;passion&#8221; looks like &#8220;aggression&#8221; stings. It makes you want to delete your LinkedIn and move to a farm with mini goats and fluffy cows, daisies growing wild all around you. But …</p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>The &#8220;What&#8221; vs. &#8220;Why&#8221; Trap &#8211; </strong>asking &#8220;Why&#8221; leads to a rumination spiral. Asking &#8220;What is happening right now?&#8221; leads to observation. But &#8220;What&#8221; is terrifying because it requires you to look at your behaviour without the shield of an excuse. I sometimes hide behind the cuteness that is my Georgia Peach. Because if you can still see my rubbish behind the adorable fluff ball in front of you, then what I’m selling truly does stink.</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Repair Mode: Awareness in Action</strong></h2></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="1250" height="937" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Writing-in-a-notebook-with-a-pen-in-hand-View-more-by-Lina-Darjans-Images.jpg" alt="Writing in a notebook with a pen in hand View more by Lina Darjan&#039;s Images" title="Writing in a notebook with a pen in hand View more by Lina Darjan&#039;s Images" class="wp-image-235652" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">Once you’ve sat in the discomfort and realised that you aren&#8217;t the infallible G-d-Queen of the boardroom (I know, it’s a surprise to me too), you enter the most critical phase &#8211; <b>Repair Mode</b>.</p>
<p class="p1">Self-awareness without repair is just a fancy way of being a self-aware jerk. Repair Mode is the bridge between <i>knowing</i> you’re difficult &#8211; or that your project is failing &#8211; and <i>actually changing</i> the impact you have on others. It’s where the rubber meets the road and usually, that road is covered in broken glass. So, stepping lightly is usually a good idea. I’d leave the stilettos behind if I were you.</p>
<h3 class="p1"><b><i>Step 1: The Tactical Apology (Not the Ego-Stroking One)</i></b></h3>
<p class="p1">Repair starts with acknowledging the impact, not the intent. Nobody cares if you &#8220;intended&#8221; to be helpful when you actually just spoke over them for twenty minutes. Repair Mode sounds like &#8211; <i>&#8220;I realised that, in our last meeting, I dominated the conversation and didn&#8217;t leave room for your input. I’m working on my self-awareness and I’m sorry for the impact that had on the team&#8221;.</i></p>
<p class="p1">Let’s not go down the same road as Jose Mourinho during his “self-aware” <a href="https://www.google.com/search?q=i+appologise+but+i+apologise+to+an+idiot+soccer+coach&amp;sca_esv=4074d84388868a32&amp;rlz=1C1AVFC_enZA990ZA990&amp;sxsrf=ANbL-n6YC_6SOX3ewkvjBMSMTCpsGYbFyA:1776333090835&amp;ei=IrHgadLYMoeFhbIPudOayQY&amp;biw=1098&amp;bih=457&amp;ved=0ahUKEwjS8Ya3jPKTAxWHQkEAHbmpJmkQ4dUDCBE&amp;uact=5&amp;oq=i+appologise+but+i+apologise+to+an+idiot+soccer+coach&amp;gs_lp=Egxnd3Mtd2l6LXNlcnAiNWkgYXBwb2xvZ2lzZSBidXQgaSBhcG9sb2dpc2UgdG8gYW4gaWRpb3Qgc29jY2VyIGNvYWNoSNQfUPkFWKMacAF4AJABAJgB7AKgAeMdqgEGMi0xMS4yuAEDyAEA-AEBmAIBoAILwgIOEAAYgAQYsAMYhgMYigXCAgsQABiABBiwAxiiBMICCxAAGLADGKIEGIkFmAMA4gMFEgExIECIBgGQBgqSBwExoAenGrIHALgHAMIHAzMtMcgHCYAIAA&amp;sclient=gws-wiz-serp#fpstate=ive&amp;vld=cid:450a2854,vid:ofL054wxBXc,st:0" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1">apology</span></a>.</p>
<h3 class="p1"><b><i>Step 2: Closing the Gap</i></b></h3>
<p class="p1">Repair Mode requires you to close the gap between your perception and theirs. This means asking for real-time course correction. Tell your team &#8211; <i>&#8220;I know I have a tendency to micromanage when I&#8217;m stressed. If you see me doing it, please use the code word &#8216;Oxygen&#8217;. It’ll help me reset&#8221;.</i> This gives others permission to help you stay aware. Just remember you gave your team and/or partner this permission – don’t go biting the messenger.</p>
<h3 class="p1"><b><i>Step 3: Self-Forgiveness (The Hard Part)</i></b></h3>
<p class="p1">You cannot repair a relationship if you’re drowning in self-loathing. If you’re constantly beating yourself up, you become the &#8220;victim&#8221; again and suddenly the conversation is about <i>your</i> feelings instead of the people you hurt. Repair requires you to be stable enough to hold space for others.</p>
<p class="p1">So, pull up your socks and put your “big girl panties” on!</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Redefining progress in the Messy Middle</strong></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">In the Messy Middle, you must learn to find &#8220;micro-victories&#8221;. We used to joke that specialists found joy in a perfectly placed semicolon in a 400-page contract. Because semantics matter. Apparently. But, in the broader business world, it’s about <i>Milestones of Survival</i>.</p>
<p class="p1">
<ul class="ul1">
<li class="li1">Did you make it through a Monday without a &#8220;quick sync&#8221; that lasted four hours? <i>That’s progress.</i></li>
<li class="li1">Did you successfully survive another meeting where &#8220;synergy&#8221; was offered instead of a functional database? <i>That’s a win.</i></li>
<li class="li1">Did you manage to keep your internal monologue from becoming your external dialogue? <i>That’s</i> p<i>romotion material.</i></li>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Setting boundaries at work: The brave “No”</strong></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">This is where boundaries go to die. Because you’re desperate for a sense of forward motion, you’re tempted to say &#8220;Yes&#8221; to every distraction, hoping one of them is the magic bullet. This is a lie. Self-awareness is what helps you recognise when you are overcommitting, people-pleasing or mistaking exhaustion for ambition. True &#8220;Braving Boundaries&#8221; means having the audacity to protect your focus &#8211;</p>
<p class="p1">
<ul class="ul1">
<li class="li1"><b>The Calendar Boundary &#8211; </b>marking yourself as <i>&#8220;Busy: Strategic Analysis&#8221;</i> for four hours just to do your job, while everyone else assumes you are in a very high-powered meeting about &#8220;Leveraging Assets&#8221;.</li>
<li class="li1"><b>The Emotional Boundary &#8211;</b> recognising that a project’s &#8220;messiness&#8221; isn’t a reflection of your worth. Your value cannot be measured by deadlines, deliverables or this quarter’s spreadsheet.</li>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Why growth happens in difficult seasons</strong></h2></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="1250" height="937" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Rain-in-the-city-View-more-by-Chalabala-from-Getty-Images.jpg" alt="Rain in the city View more by Chalabala from Getty Images" title="Rain in the city View more by Chalabala from Getty Images" class="wp-image-235654" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">Here’s the dark, satirical truth &#8211; the finish line is overrated. Once you finish, you just get a bigger, messier project as a &#8220;reward&#8221; for your competence. The Messy Middle is where the actual growth happens &#8211; mostly because you’re too exhausted to maintain your professional facade.</p>
<p class="p1">It’s in the middle that teams actually bond (usually over a shared frustration with the new project management software). It’s where processes get lean (because you literally don&#8217;t have the energy for the &#8220;fluff&#8221; anymore). It’s where true leadership is forged (or at least, people who can keep a straight face while explaining a 200% budget overrun are identified for future executive roles).</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>4 survival tactics for overwhelmed professionals</strong></h2></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-1486" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Lower the Bar &#8211;</strong> not for quality, but for your expectations of &#8220;perfection&#8221;. You’re looking for &#8220;functional and not currently on fire.&#8221;</p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-1487" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Find Your &#8220;Personal Board of Advisors&#8221; &#8211;</strong> the 2-3 colleagues you can text at 10:00 PM to ask, <i>&#8220;Is it just me, or is this whole initiative actually a social experiment?&#8221;</i></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Acknowledge the Hallucination &#8211;</strong> just as AI has &#8220;hallucinations&#8221;, corporate strategies have them too. When the plan stops making sense, stop following the plan.</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Practice Strategic Apathy &#8211; </strong>care deeply about the outcome, but care very little about the &#8220;noise&#8221;. You’re the mountain. A very tired, slightly cynical mountain.</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p>If your team is stuck in the Messy Middle together, our <a class="underline underline underline-offset-2 decoration-1 decoration-current/40 hover:decoration-current focus:decoration-current" href="https://bravingboundaries.com/corporate-creative-workshops-seminars/">corporate workshops</a> are built for exactly this.</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Here’s to the Elite (and the Exhausted)</strong></h2></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1250" height="937" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Happy-beautiful-woman-laughing-while-holding-coffee-View-more-by-YakobchukOlena-from-Getty-Images.jpg" alt="Happy beautiful woman laughing while holding coffee View more by YakobchukOlena from Getty Images" title="Happy beautiful woman laughing while holding coffee View more by YakobchukOlena from Getty Images" class="wp-image-235647" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">At <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/"><span class="s1"><b>Braving Boundaries</b></span></a>, we’ve realised that the most &#8220;elite&#8221; professionals aren&#8217;t the ones with the cleanest desks. They’re the ones who can sit in the middle of a chaotic, half-finished, over-budget disaster and calmly ask,<i> &#8220;Ok, what’s the next small step?&#8221;</i><i></i></p>
<p class="p1">We’re eternally grateful for the Messy Middle. Without it, we wouldn’t need sophisticated technology, high-level strategic consulting or three double espressos before 9:00 AM. We’d just be people with good ideas and no way to execute them.</p>
<p class="p1">So, here’s to the orchestrators of the chaos, the survivors of the &#8220;mid-project slump&#8221; and the professionals who still haven&#8217;t figured out why their automated workflows are sending invoices to the office cat.</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Ready to brave your boundaries?</strong></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">If this article made you feel slightly attacked, incredibly seen or just deeply uncomfortable &#8211; good. That’s the first step toward a version of you that doesn&#8217;t need a cardboard cutout to survive the day.</p>
<p class="p1">But you don’t have to navigate the &#8220;Messy Middle&#8221; or the &#8220;Repair Mode&#8221; alone. If you’re ready to trade your armour for actual, sustainable growth, it’s time to talk to a professional who knows how to navigate these trenches.</p>
<p class="p1"><strong><span class="s1"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/contact-me/"><i>Contact</i></a></span><i> Frieda Levycky at Braving Boundaries.</i></strong><b><i></i></b></p>
<p class="p1"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/my-story/">Frieda</a> specialises in helping professionals navigate the complex, often messy world of self-awareness, emotional intelligence and sustainable growth. Whether you’re a lawyer, a CEO, an overworked Executive or just someone tired of their own excuses, Frieda provides the sounding board you need to move from &#8220;horrified realisation&#8221; to &#8220;meaningful change&#8221;.</p>
<p class="p1"><b>Explore <a class="underline underline underline-offset-2 decoration-1 decoration-current/40 hover:decoration-current focus:decoration-current" href="https://bravingboundaries.com/work-with-me/individual-coaching/">individual coaching with Frieda</a> — designed for professionals who are done performing and ready to do the real work.</b></p>
<p class="p1">Stop pretending you&#8217;re bulletproof. Start being real. The view from the 15% is much better &#8211; even if it takes a little discomfort to get there.</p>
<p class="p1">
<p class="p2"><span class="s2"><i>(Sources used and to whom we owe thanks – </i><a href="https://skillpath.com/blog/self-awareness-is-the-strongest-predictor-of-leadership-success" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Skillpath</i></span></a><i>; LinkedIn </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/posts/tashaeurich_think-youre-self-aware-odds-are-youre-activity-7361475393603715072-eYRk/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a><i>, </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/my-three-biggest-self-awareness-lessons-researcher-tasha-eurich/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a></span><span class="s3"> </span><span class="s2"><i>and </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/google-decodes-messy-middle-buying-process-g-david-dodd/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://www.successpodcast.com/show-notes/2020/5/20/you-arent-actually-self-aware-with-tasha-eurich#:~:text=She%2520is%2520the%2520New%2520York,Understanding%2520how%2520people%2520see%2520us." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Success Podcast</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://www.forbes.com/sites/jeffkauflin/2017/05/10/only-15-of-people-are-self-aware-heres-how-to-change/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Forbes</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://hbr.org/2018/01/what-self-awareness-really-is-and-how-to-cultivate-it" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Harvard Business Review</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://medium.com/mind-cafe/why-introspection-isnt-the-best-way-to-self-awareness-140b8492e6fe" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Medium</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://katedejong.com/the-self-awareness-gap/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Kate de Jong</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://tim.blog/2018/09/13/scott-belsky/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Tim Ferriss</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://www.ted.com/talks/tasha_eurich_increase_your_self_awareness_with_one_simple_fix" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>TED Talks</i></span></a><i> and </i><a href="https://www.tech4law.co.za/news-in-brief/local/taking-stock-part-i/#:~:text=We%2520all%2520look%2520forward%2520to,happens%2520to%2520all%2520of%2520us.&amp;text=But%2520what%2520does%2520that%2520quote,the%2520Forrest%2520for%2520the%2520trees." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Tech4law</i></span></a><i>). <span class="Apple-converted-space">       </span></i></span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p>
<p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:alicia@thebelletrist.com" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">alicia@thebelletrist.com</a>  </strong></div>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-messy-middle-why-self-awareness-feels-hard/">The Messy Middle: Why Self-Awareness Feels Hard</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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		<title>The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts! Part I &#8211; Especially for Individuals</title>
		<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-i-especially-for-individuals/</link>
					<comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-i-especially-for-individuals/#respond</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 30 Oct 2025 11:10:58 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stress & Anxiety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[work-life balance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[boundaries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Christmas pressure]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[end-of-year tips]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[holiday burnout]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Personal development]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[stress management]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wellbeing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[year-end stress]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235409</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-i-especially-for-individuals/">The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts! Part I &#8211; Especially for Individuals</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p class="p1"><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-ii-especially-for-teams">Click here for Part II: The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts – Especially for teams …</a></span></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p class="p1">It can’t be that time of the year already, can it?</p>
<p class="p1">Wow, this year has flown by. It literally felt like Januuuuaaaaarrryyyyyyyy, Febrrrrrrruuuuuuuaaaaaaaarrrryyyyyyy and Maaaaaaaaarch took up most of the year, then AprMayJuneJulyAugustSept and October were sort of compacted into a few short weeks. Or so it seemed. And now we are left with the last two months of the year.</p>
<p class="p1">I’m not sure about you, but usually when the end of year starts approaching, I become a real Grinch. Not because I dislike Christmas. Actually, I LOVE this time of the year. The lights, the Christmas décor, the mulled wine and hot cocoa. The joy that’s in the air. No matter your age, the end of the year brings with it a kind of magic. However, when you’re the one responsible for closing up shop, purchasing gifts, cooking, visiting family and friends and generally all of the organising, it can feel a little unnerving and suddenly two months doesn’t feel like enough time.</p>
<p class="p1">It’s like we become burdened with endless responsibilities with trying to fit everything in. With trying to make sure everyone is happy and everything is done “just right.” The problem with that is that it often comes at the cost of our own enjoyment and happiness. You end up turning into the Grinch on a mission to “tick all the boxes.”</p>
<p class="p1">And, frankly, who does that serve? Not a single soul.</p>
<p class="p1">We get so caught up in the madness of the end of the year and before we know it, we are stressed to the max, overwhelmed and feeling frustrated at just how little time we have left to get everything done. Most importantly we can completely lose the joy, fun and excitement of this time of the year. And that just doesn’t feel right.</p>
<p class="p1">There has got to be a different way?!</p>
<p class="p1">A way that means that you can enjoy this time, while still getting all the important things done. A way that doesn’t put your mental and emotional wellbeing at stake because the point here is to thrive through the end of year craziness! Not suffer through it.</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Preparing for year-end pressures</strong></h2></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Sprinter-Getting-Ready-to-Start-by-Dean-Drobot.jpg" alt="Sprinter Getting Ready to Start by Dean Drobot" title="Sprinter Getting Ready to Start by Dean Drobot" class="wp-image-235443" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1"><strong>How individuals can prepare for the end of year silliness</strong></p>
<p class="p1">I was reading <a href="https://amazingbusiness.com/6-ways-to-thrive-through-the-end-of-year-craziness/#:~:text=It%2520is%2520that%2520time%2520of,I%2520could%2520enjoy%2520this%2520time." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1">an article</span></a> by Kim Baird regarding her prep for the end of the year and really liked her 6 guidelines. They set out as follows –</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong>Get clear on your priorities</strong> – with more than enough to do at this time of the year, it’s important that you know what is most important to you, so that you can focus on those things and not allow them to slip through the cracks. Take some time, sit down and write down the most important things at this time of the year. You can do this by asking yourself some pertinent questions like: <i>What is most important for you to get done before the end of the year? What goals do you want to achieve? </i>(remember to be realistic here and not overburden yourself) and <i>how do you want to feel come the end of the year?</i> Once you have answered these questions, it’s time to set up a schedule so that you can fit these priorities into your life. That includes family time … because otherwise we find that there’s no time left for the things that are most important to us.</div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong>Get good at saying “No” </strong><b>– </b>if you are a “yes man” this is your time to change your ways. You don’t need to be superhuman. No one has time for that. Instead learn to embrace the “no.” You cannot do everything and cannot be everywhere. It is perfectly acceptable to say “no thank you” as well. Because you are worth it. Your goals, your business and your wellbeing are worth it. They don’t need to always be getting pushed to the bottom of the priorities list! That’s why getting clear on your priorities is so important. Once you know what those are, saying no to everything else becomes a lot easier.</div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong>Schedule in downtime for self-care</strong><b> – </b>being busy is good, getting things done is even better, but having a schedule that leaves little room for you and your own wellbeing practices will not help you thrive as you get through the silly season. You are as important as year end and planning for the New Year. If you are only getting caught up in the busyness of the season you risk burnout or getting sick because you are not taking care of yourself. Make yourself a priority. Schedule in your own downtime and self-care.</div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong>Delete the unnecessary</strong> – striving for excellence and reaching epic goals is impressive but, at this time of the year, it isn’t necessary. Not really. Being ambitious is one thing. Being realistic is far better. Especially now. Deleting the unnecessary is in line with saying no, it’s just going a little deeper. Delete things from your list that are just not that important and don’t weigh yourself down with massive responsibility to get everything done. Recognise what is truly important to you and what really needs to be done and delete the rest of your list.</div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong>Delegate what you can</strong> – you aren’t an island and there’s no “I” in team. Get the picture? You don’t need to do everything yourself and you don’t need to control everything. You are still worthy, deserving and valuable even when you get other people to help with the things that need to be done. It’s ok to ask for help and it’s ok to delegate tasks to others. It may even be beneficial in the long run. So, ask for help if you need it.</div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><i></i><strong>Take focused action</strong> – sitting at your computer or laptop trying to work and taking focused action are two vastly different things. Make sure that when you’re working, you remove all the distractions around you that will take your focus away and truly focus on the matter at hand. It’s also a good idea to plan ahead for your day (the day before). Understand that you have 3 or so important tasks that need to get done the next day and plan how you’re going to go about doing them. When you are taking focused action, you are more productive, and you can get huge amounts done in a small amount of time. And this frees up more time and space for downtime, fun and looking after you. Ultimately helping you to thrive through the end of year craziness!</div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">It’s clear from the above that closing off the end of the year and planning for the New Year while also shopping for Christmas presents and everything else the end of year brings can be done in a way that makes you thrive! In a way that helps you enjoy this time of year. In a way that allows you to feel less guilty and less crazy with all the end of the year holds. It just takes some planning, some prioritising and it definitely takes some saying no.</p>
<p class="p1">And lastly if you need support as you go through the end of year craziness, get in touch with Frieda Levycky at <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/"><span class="s1">Braving Boundaries</span></a>. Don’t waste a moment more! Again, asking for help is not only brave but the best thing you can do for you. No matter what time of the year you do it in.</p>
<p class="p2"><i>(Sources used and to whom we owe thanks – </i><a href="https://www.gouldtraining.co.uk/topics/assertiveness/setting-boundaries/boundaries-at-work" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Gould Training</i></span></a><i>; LinkedIn </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/navigating-year-end-pressures-finding-balance-amid-di-dia-pcc-szzce/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a><i> and </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/manage-year-end-stress-go-q1-strong-approach-miller-caton-jr-mrmhf/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a><i> and </i><a href="https://amazingbusiness.com/6-ways-to-thrive-through-the-end-of-year-craziness/#:~:text=It%2520is%2520that%2520time%2520of,I%2520could%2520enjoy%2520this%2520time." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Amazing Business</i></span></a><i>).<span class="Apple-converted-space">   </span></i></p></div>
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				<a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Revised-Corporate-Services-Brochure-2025.pdf" target="_blank"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/End-of-blog-post-CTA-image.jpg" alt="End of blog post CTA image (5)" title="End of blog post CTA image" class="wp-image-235400" /></span></a>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p>
<p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:alicia@thebelletrist.com" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">alicia@thebelletrist.com</a>  </strong></div>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-i-especially-for-individuals/">The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts! Part I &#8211; Especially for Individuals</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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		<title>The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts! Part II &#8211; Especially for Teams</title>
		<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-ii-especially-for-teams/</link>
					<comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-ii-especially-for-teams/#respond</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 30 Oct 2025 11:05:06 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Communication]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[burnout prevention]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[communication]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[corporate wellness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[employee engagement]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[end-of-year stress]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[leadership]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mental health at work]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mindful working]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[team performance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[team wellbeing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[workplace culture]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[year-end planning]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235421</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-ii-especially-for-teams/">The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts! Part II &#8211; Especially for Teams</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p class="p1"><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-i-especially-for-individuals">Click here for Part I: The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts – Especially for individuals …</a></span></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p class="p1">Just as it is in our personal lives, the end-of-year rush takes hold at work too. As deadlines tighten, budgets close and projects demand wrapping up, teams everywhere find themselves hurtling toward December with little time to rest. The pace quickens, expectations rise and even the most cohesive teams can begin to feel the strain.</p>
<p class="p1">In theory, this should be the season for celebration: a chance to recognise collective achievements and enjoy the camaraderie built over the year. Yet, more often than not, it becomes a blur of back-to-back meetings, last-minute deliverables and frantic attempts to “get everything done before the holidays”. The joy of teamwork gives way to the tyranny of ticking boxes.</p>
<p class="p1">Perfection takes priority over presence and connection is lost in the noise of productivity. The focus shifts from collaboration to completion, leaving even the strongest teams drained and disconnected.</p>
<p class="p1">This time of year doesn’t have to be about survival. With a more mindful and intentional approach, teams can finish the year with focus, appreciation and energy, not exhaustion. It’s about swapping stress for strategy and rediscovering the meaning behind working <i>together</i>.</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Preparing for year-end pressures</strong></h2></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Athletes-Ready-at-the-Starting-Blocks-by-Aflo-Images-from-アフロ(Aflo).jpg" alt="Athletes Ready at the Starting Blocks by Aflo Images from アフロ(Aflo)" title="Athletes Ready at the Starting Blocks by Aflo Images from アフロ(Aflo)" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1"><strong>How teams can prepare for the end of the year silliness</strong></p>
<p class="p1">Year-end pressures can be overwhelming for both leaders and teams. Here are some ways to mitigate the stress and maintain well-being &#8211;</p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Setting clear expectations and workload management</strong></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
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<li class="li1"><b>Communicate targets realistically &#8211;</b> define achievable end-of-year goals (yes be realistic) and deadlines without creating an overwhelming workload (because that would defeat the purpose, wouldn’t it?).</li>
<li class="li1"><b>Prioritise tasks &#8211;</b> focus on tasks with the highest impact and delegate or postpone others if at all possible. Learn to say no, prioritise and ask for help.</li>
<li class="li1"><b>Break down large projects &#8211;</b> divide major tasks into smaller, manageable milestones to maintain momentum and avoid burnout. After all, this is the end of the year, set your tasks at an achievable level. Tackle the most important things first. Leave the rest, if you can, until the New Year.</li>
<li class="li1"><b>Allocate tasks fairly &#8211;</b> distribute responsibilities based on individual capacity and capabilities to ensure no one is overloaded, overwhelmed and stressed out. It’s their end of the year too. Remember that.</li>
<li class="li1"><b>Plan in advance &#8211;</b> look at the calendar and determine resource needs, potential flexibility options and celebration plans before the busy season begins.</li>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Protecting boundaries</strong><b></b></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
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<li class="li1"><b>Encourage employees to set boundaries &#8211;</b> leaders should encourage and commend employees for establishing their own boundaries and model this behaviour themselves. Lead by example as they say.</li>
<li class="li1"><b>Communicate boundaries clearly &#8211; </b>employees should define and communicate their work hours and availability to colleagues and clients, clearly but politely. Sometimes a firm word is required.</li>
<li class="li1"><b>Practice saying no &#8211;</b> learn to politely decline tasks that exceed capacity and bandwidth. You matter too.</li>
<li class="li1"><b>Disconnect after hours &#8211;</b> encourage employees to unplug from work-related communications during off-hours. Unless it’s life threatening, after-hours should be sacrosanct.</li>
<li class="li1"><b>Seek support &#8211;</b> employees should feel comfortable discussing their workload and seeking help from managers or colleagues if they are overwhelmed. Delegation is important and sometimes very necessary. Leaders and employees must be open to this.</li>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Creating space for reflection and closure</strong><b></b></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<ul class="ul1">
<li class="li1"><b>Encourage breaks and downtime &#8211;</b> regular breaks throughout the workday and during the holiday season are essential for recharging and maintaining focus. It’s no longer a bum on seats scenario and burning the midnight oil is so old school. We have moved beyond that now and recognise that burnout is real. Downtime is, in fact, necessary.</li>
<li class="li1"><b>Promote self-care &#8211;</b> encourage practices such as adequate sleep, healthy eating, exercise and mindfulness techniques.</li>
<li class="li1"><b>Reflect on the year&#8217;s successes and challenges &#8211;</b> before the break, leaders and teams can reflect on achievements, lessons learned and areas for improvement, helping to build momentum for the new year.</li>
<li class="li1"><b>Celebrate wins &#8211;</b> acknowledge and celebrate achievements, both big and small, to boost morale and engagement.</li>
<li class="li1"><b>Recharge intentionally &#8211;</b> take time to rest and reset to ensure a refreshed start to the New Year.</li>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">The end of the year doesn’t have to feel like a mad dash to the finish. With a bit of planning, clearer priorities and a few well-placed “no’s”, it can be a time to thrive rather than merely survive.</p>
<p class="p1">In the workplace, that means creating a culture that supports people; one that values wellbeing as much as performance. Open, honest communication is vital. Speak up when you’re stretched, ask for help, delegate where you can and support one another through the crunch.</p>
<p class="p1">If you or your team could use some guidance navigating this busy season, reach out to Frieda Levycky at <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/"><span class="s1">Braving Boundaries</span></a>. Sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is ask for help, whatever time of year it may be.</p>
<p class="p1"><i>(Sources used and to whom we owe thanks – </i><a href="https://www.gouldtraining.co.uk/topics/assertiveness/setting-boundaries/boundaries-at-work" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Gould Training</i></span></a><i>; LinkedIn </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/navigating-year-end-pressures-finding-balance-amid-di-dia-pcc-szzce/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a><i> and </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/manage-year-end-stress-go-q1-strong-approach-miller-caton-jr-mrmhf/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a><i> and </i><a href="https://amazingbusiness.com/6-ways-to-thrive-through-the-end-of-year-craziness/#:~:text=It%2520is%2520that%2520time%2520of,I%2520could%2520enjoy%2520this%2520time." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Amazing Business</i></span></a><i>).<span class="Apple-converted-space">   </span></i></p></div>
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				<a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Revised-Corporate-Services-Brochure-2025.pdf" target="_blank"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/End-of-blog-post-CTA-image.jpg" alt="End of blog post CTA image (5)" title="End of blog post CTA image" class="wp-image-235400" /></span></a>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p>
<p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:alicia@thebelletrist.com" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">alicia@thebelletrist.com</a>  </strong></div>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-ii-especially-for-teams/">The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts! Part II &#8211; Especially for Teams</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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		<title>What’s Holding You Back? Overcoming Imposter Syndrome and Fear of Failure</title>
		<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/whats-holding-you-back-overcoming-imposter-syndrome-and-fear-of-failure/</link>
					<comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/whats-holding-you-back-overcoming-imposter-syndrome-and-fear-of-failure/#respond</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 28 Aug 2025 14:13:28 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Change]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Finding direction and purpose]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Personal Growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stress & Anxiety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The Fears series]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Barriers to Success]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Coaching for Confidence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fear of failure]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How to Build Confidence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mindset Shifts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Navigating Change]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Overcoming Anxiety at Work]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Overcoming Imposter Syndrome]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[personal growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Psychology of Success]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-Doubt and Confidence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-Sabotage]]></category>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/whats-holding-you-back-overcoming-imposter-syndrome-and-fear-of-failure/">What’s Holding You Back? Overcoming Imposter Syndrome and Fear of Failure</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5>
<p><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It’s a funny thing.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">When we think about all the things we have accomplished in our lives &#8211; and some of the things that we haven’t accomplished (yet) &#8211; each thing has been because we either made up our minds that we were going to give it our all, or we decided that “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">the juice just wasn’t worth the squeeze</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">” (a saying I have used since I was a teenager). </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But the common denominator here is that it’s always been up to us. Sure, we may get help every now and again, but whether we succeed or fail has always been up to us. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">So, the thing that I am pondering is this: </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">What holds us back on the times when we don’t succeed?</span></i> <i><span style="font-weight: 400;">What is the thing that keeps us from even trying?</span></i></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">And it’s that “thing” that invisible barrier that we put in front of ourselves to stop ourselves that has me interested. It’s the why that has me intrigued. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I have some theories and, for some or other reason, I have the </span><a href="https://mrmen.fandom.com/wiki/Little_Miss_characters"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Little Miss characters</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> in mind – as if by imagining these barriers as little characters, they are easier to boot. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Shall we dive in?</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Common Barriers to Achieving our Goals (Imposter Syndrome and Fear of Failure)</strong></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It stands to reason that there will be the usual suspects when it comes to the barriers to pursuing our dreams and our goals. You know, the common miscreants that turn our confidence into gloop and our self-esteem into putty. Perhaps you have heard of them?</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Little Miss Imposter Syndrome</strong><b> &#8211; </b><span style="font-weight: 400;">This little number knows how to play us for fools. You know the saying “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">fake it ‘til you make it?</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">”, well Little Miss Imposter Syndrome not only has her admirers singing that like their favourite tune, but believing it wholeheartedly as well. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">They believe they are frauds that they will be “found out” any day now. That they are not good enough. That one day someone will find out that they were faking “it” the whole time. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Despite being excellent at their job. Despite being more than qualified. Despite being trained and proficient in their role. Despite all the evidence to the contrary, they believe they are failures. All rubbish. And yet, Little Miss Imposter Syndrome has them eating out of her outstretched hand. According to </span><a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/imposter-syndrome-and-social-anxiety-disorder-4156469"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Verywellmind</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">:</span></p>
<blockquote>
<p><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“Imposter syndrome is not a </span></i><a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/definition-of-mental-illness-4587855" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">diagnosable mental illness</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">. Instead, the term is usually narrowly applied to intelligence and achievement, although it also has links to perfectionism and the social context. It can show up in the context of work, relationships, friendships, or just overall, that holds us back from the self-confidence we&#8217;ve earned and deserve to feel. Psychologists Suzanna Imes and Pauline Rose Clance first used this term in the 1970s”. </span></i></p>
</blockquote>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The sweet irony here is that people that suffer from Little Miss Imposter Syndrome’s attentions are often highly accomplished, super impressive people. There is no apparent reason for them to feel like an imposter, and yet they do. This is what makes it such a challenging psychological phenomenon that needs to be unpacked.</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Little Miss Fear of Failure</strong><b> &#8211; </b><span style="font-weight: 400;">This Little Miss is a funny one. Because she’s slightly deceiving. You don’t realllly notice her right away because, let’s be honest, a lot of us are kind of scared of the big F. And we mean failing. Not the other F. None of us like it. Who likes failing? Sure, we may be scared to fail, and it may give us pause before we start something new, but do we have an actual fear of it? You see that’s why we say Little Miss Fear of Failure can be a tough one to crack. Little Miss Fear of Failure </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">is</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> a type of anxiety disorder that can manifest through thought patterns and subconscious behaviours, such as self-sabotage or procrastination. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Clinically Little Miss Fear of Failure has a “stage name.” She is known as atychiphobia. Not very showtuney we admit. But it does mean that there is an irrational and persistent fear of failing. This fear can stem from a number of sources. Sometimes it might emerge in response to a specific situation. In other cases, it might be related to another mental health condition such as anxiety or depression. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Little Miss Fear of Failure can produce emotional and behavioural symptoms – she’s fun like that. Some of her common entourage include – anxiety, avoidance (they’re cousins), feeling a loss of control as well as helplessness and powerlessness (they’re twins). In addition to emotional and behavioural symptoms, people who hang out with Little Miss Fear of Failure may also experience physical symptoms including rapid heart rate, chest tightness, trembling, dizziness, light-headedness, sweating, and digestive problems. It’s an absolute hoot! </span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>How do you know if you and Little Miss Imposter Syndrome have met? </strong></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Well, the funny thing is, Little Miss Imposter Syndrome used to only target high-achieving women. But now, with Little Miss Imposter Syndrome becoming more well known, or rather a more widely experienced phenomenon, she has no preference. Little Miss Imposter Syndrome targets anyone, no matter their social status, work background, skill level, or degree of expertise. </span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/08/Exhausted-millennial-african-woman-suffering-from-dry-eyes-syndrome.-by-fizkes-from-Getty-Images.jpg" alt="Exhausted millennial african woman suffering from dry eyes syndrome. by fizkes from Getty Images" title="Exhausted millennial african woman suffering from dry eyes syndrome. by fizkes from Getty Images" class="wp-image-235351" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">If you wonder whether you and Little Miss Imposter Syndrome have become well acquainted of late, ask yourself the following questions:</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;"></span></p>
<ul>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Do you agonize over even the smallest mistakes or flaws in your work?</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Do you attribute your success to luck or outside factors?</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Are you sensitive to even constructive criticism?</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Do you feel like you will inevitably be found out as a phony?</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Do you downplay your own expertise, even in areas where you are genuinely more skilled than others?</span></li>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>How do you know if you and Little Miss Fear of Failure have met? </strong></h2></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/08/Failure-concept-View-more-by-alexskopje-from-Getty-Images-Pro.jpg" alt="" title="Failure concept View more by alexskopje from Getty Images Pro" class="wp-image-235352" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Little Miss Fear of Failure is intense. You’ll know if you have met her because you will feel that a toll has been taken on your beliefs in your abilities and your motivation to pursue your goals, accompanied by:</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;"></span></p>
<ul>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong>Low self-esteem</strong><b> &#8211;</b><span style="font-weight: 400;"> people who fear failure may also engage in negative self-talk or have low self-confidence that makes it difficult to pursue goals. </span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong>Poor motivation</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – if someone actually fears failure, they may also experience a lack of motivation that makes it difficult to get started on projects and work toward goals. When something seems too challenging or involves learning new skills, people may simply give up or refuse to get involved before they have even begun.</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong>Self-sabotage</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – it’s not unusual to be loved by anyone…. nor is it uncommon for people who fear failure to engage in acts of self-handicapping that undermine their own chances of success. Why even try when you can sabotage instead – it’s not your fault if it’s someone else’s, right? </span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong>Shame</strong><span> – Little Miss Fear of Failure is well acquainted with the fear of experiencing shame or embarrassment. Failing can trigger feelings worthlessness, so avoiding trying in the first place can sometimes serve as a way to protect the self from disappointment, regret, and sadness. A weird way to protect yourself from worse.</span></li>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>How do you end your relationship with Little Miss Imposter Syndrome?</strong></h2></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/08/Friends-talking-to-each-other-View-more-by-simonkr-from-Getty-Images-Signature.jpg" alt="Friends talking to each other View more by simonkr from Getty Images Signature" title="Friends talking to each other View more by simonkr from Getty Images Signature" class="wp-image-235354" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The problem with Little Miss Impostor Syndrome is that the experience of doing well at something does nothing to change your beliefs. The thought still nags in your head: &#8220;</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">What gives me the right to be here?</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">&#8220;. The more you accomplish, the more you feel like a fraud. It&#8217;s as though you can&#8217;t </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">internalise</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> your experiences of success.</span> <span style="font-weight: 400;">And b</span><span style="font-weight: 400;">ecause imposter syndrome eats at you from the inside out, often with no outward signs of struggle, it makes it all the more important to recognise and take steps to address your ill-founded feelings. Otherwise, your feeling of false incompetence will prevent you from pursuing a professional goal that might actually be right for you. And that will only lead to more regret, more negative self-talk, more self-loathing, anxiety and eventually depression. So how do we nip this in the bud so to speak? Name and shame! Name her, call her out and let her know she is no longer welcome here! To do this, or to get to this point, you can do the following &#8211; </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;"></span></p>
<ul>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong>Share your feelings </strong><b>&#8211; </b><span style="font-weight: 400;">talk it out. Tell someone how you feel. Whether it’s a friend, family member or professional. Tell them how you feel. Irrational beliefs tend to fester when they are hidden and not talked about.</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong>Focus on someone else</strong><b> &#8211; </b><span style="font-weight: 400;">while this might feel counterintuitive, try to help others in the same situation as you. If you see someone who seems awkward or alone, ask them a question to bring them into the group. As you practice your skills, you will build confidence in your own abilities.</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong>Assess your abilities</strong><b> &#8211;</b><span style="font-weight: 400;"> if you have long-held beliefs about your incompetence in social and performance situations, make a realistic assessment of your abilities. Get unbiased help. Write down your accomplishments and what you are good at, then compare these with your self-assessment. Seek the counsel of someone outside of your immediate support circle, who will be able to guide you unbiasedly, like Frieda Levycky of </span><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Braving Boundaries</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">. </span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong>Question your own thoughts</strong><b> &#8211; </b><span style="font-weight: 400;">as you start to assess your abilities, start to question whether your thoughts are rational. Does it make rational sense to believe that you are a fraud given everything that you know? Does 1 + 1 = 2?</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><strong>Most importantly &#8211; Stop comparing! </strong><b>&#8211; </b><span style="font-weight: 400;">every time you compare yourself to others, in whichever capacity that is, you are going to find something wrong with yourself. It’s only natural. And that will only serve to fuel the feeling of not being good enough or not belonging. Instead, focus on listening to what the other person is saying. Be genuinely interested in learning more. Open yourself up to new experiences and new people. We are all different and we can all learn from one another. </span></li>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>How do you end your relationship with Little Miss Fear of Failure? </strong></h2></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/08/Success-and-Failure-Concept-View-more-by-pixelshot.jpg" alt="Success and Failure Concept View more by pixelshot" title="Success and Failure Concept View more by pixelshot" class="wp-image-235356" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The key to breaking tup with Little Miss Fear of Failure is recognising your behaviours. For some, the anxiety created by a fear of failure becomes so familiar that maintaining it feels safer than working through the underlying cause. It’s safer, it’s easier. Just maintain the status quo. It might take some time to recognise that she is bad for you, and it may take some time to recognise the signs of fearing failure in yourself. So, don’t be too hard on yourself. The symptoms can be interwoven with shame, depression, anxiety, or low self-esteem, which makes identifying a fear of failure as the root cause so hard to spot. Self-awareness and patience are crucial, but it’s also critical to be compassionate with yourself. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">As with learning any new skill, it takes time. However, when you learn how to work with a fear of failure, you open the door to greater life and career satisfaction. You’ll feel more confident and better equipped to work toward achieving life goals, and you’ll ultimately experience greater life fulfilment. After you have identified the need to break up with Little Miss Fear of Failure, the next step is to work through your feelings. And you can do this by:</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-1486" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Accepting that failure is normal</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> &#8211; even the most successful people experience failure. The ability to overcome obstacles and accept mistakes is a key part of achieving success. By learning from your mistakes, you’re a step closer to reaching your goals. If you fail, remind yourself that it’s normal. It’s life.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-1487" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Talk to someone you trust</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> &#8211; if you’re feeling stuck, overthinking and overwhelm can kick in. Talking to someone you trust, such as a friend, mentor, family member, or therapist, can help shed new light on your situation. Tell them about your fears and listen to their feedback. An outsider’s perspective on your challenges can change how you see things.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Remember the cost of not trying</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> &#8211; making decisions based on a fear of failure can come at a cost. You could miss out on some of life’s great opportunities if you never try anything unfamiliar. Remember that trying and failing is often better than not trying at all. </span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/4.png" alt="" title="4" class="wp-image-1489" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Maintain a flexible mindset</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – be easy breezy lemon squeezy. Go with the flow. Approach every situation with the mindset that you can learn and grow from the experience. Be flexible enough to move with each situation. Don’t pre-judge the situation and think you’ll fail before you even start. As long as you’re willing to adapt, you’re never truly stuck in a decision.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/5.png" alt="" title="5" class="wp-image-1490" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Be afraid but do it anyway</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – be brave and the mighty forces will come to your aid. Or something along those lines. Sometimes you just have to put the “big person pants” on and go for it. Be brave and you’ll be surprised at what you can accomplish. Don’t let the fear stop you from the really cool things that life has to offer. </span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/6.jpg" alt="" title="6" class="wp-image-1491" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Work on taking risks</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> &#8211; a fear of failure can make you risk averse. But taking small, healthy risks is a little less scary. More manageable. So perhaps you can take a larger risk, and break it down into smaller more manageable risks, Tackle it one small bite at a time. With practice, you’ll grow more comfortable taking a reasonable risk. </span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Get comfortable with rejection</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> &#8211; every time you put yourself out there, you risk rejection. And that is normal. For us all. But if you approach it as a learning curve, every rejection becomes an opportunity to gain experience and to grow. And when has that ever been a bad thing?</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Try new things</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> – doing the same old thing is like wearing the same old trusted jersey. It fits, it’s comfy, it’s dependable and there’s no fuss. But there’s also no excitement. Get uncomfortable for a change. Try on a new “outfit” (tip – we are not talking about clothes here) and get out of your comfort zone. if you attempt new things or visit new places, you can grow more comfortable with being uncomfortable. You’ll learn something new and gain practice. While discomfort is uncomfortable, it’s also a sign that you’re expanding your horizons. And that’s a good thing!</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">With Little Miss Imposter Syndrome and Little Miss Fear of Failure given their marching orders, following your dreams may be a tad easier to achieve and success may be just around the corner. Who knows? Maybe Little Miss Sunshine, Little Miss Splendid and Little Miss Magic will keep you company instead. They seem like far healthier bedfellows from where we’re sitting. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">But understand this – giving Little Miss Imposter Syndrome and Little Miss Fear of Failure the boot is only the first step. Working through your feelings and working on yourself, on an ongoing basis, is key. If you feel you need assistance with identifying and working through your feelings, </span><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/contact-me/"><span style="font-weight: 400;">get in touch</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> with Frieda Levycky of Braving Boundaries who is perfectly poised to support you as you learn to manage your relationship with these toxic Little Misses. </span></p>
<p><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">(Sources used and to whom we owe thanks – verywellmind </span></i><a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-the-fear-of-failure-5176202" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">here</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> and </span></i><a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/imposter-syndrome-and-social-anxiety-disorder-4156469" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">here</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> and </span></i><a href="https://www.betterup.com/blog/how-to-overcome-fear-of-failure" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">BetterUp</span></i></a><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">).</span></i></p></div>
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<li><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/living-with-the-fear-of-rejection/"><b>Living with the Fear of Rejection</b></a></li>
<li><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/facing-the-fear-of-rejection/"><b>Facing the Fear of Rejection</b></a></li>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p>
<p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:alicia@thebelletrist.com" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">alicia@thebelletrist.com</a>  </strong></div>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/whats-holding-you-back-overcoming-imposter-syndrome-and-fear-of-failure/">What’s Holding You Back? Overcoming Imposter Syndrome and Fear of Failure</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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		<title>How to Beat Procrastination (Part 2): Practical Strategies That Work</title>
		<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/how-to-beat-procrastination-part-2/</link>
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		<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 16 Jul 2025 15:32:49 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Procrastination]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stress & Anxiety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[beating procrastination]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[how to stop procrastinating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[implementation intentions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[overcoming procrastination]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pomodoro technique]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[procrastination]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[procrastination emotional root]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[productivity for professionals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[science-backed productivity tools]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-compassion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[time management]]></category>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/how-to-beat-procrastination-part-2/">How to Beat Procrastination (Part 2): Practical Strategies That Work</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY FRIEDA LEVYCKY, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/" style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;">BRAVING BOUNDARIES</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5>
<p><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></p>
<p><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">(Yes, finally.)</span></i></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">So here we are. Part 2 of the procrastination series. Only three years in the making. I mean, if that’s not living the work, I don’t know what is.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">For those of you who’ve been waiting patiently since </span><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/beating-procrastination-part-1/"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Part 1</span></i></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> (published in June 2022 &#8211; sorry about that), thank you. You’ll be pleased to know that the delay wasn’t due to a lack of inspiration. Quite the opposite. I’ve had plenty of real-life examples of procrastination play out in all their glory; some impressively creative, others frustratingly familiar.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">There was the weekend I’d set aside to write this article in July <strong><em>2022</em> </strong>… which coincided, very inconveniently, with a sudden and unrelenting need to sort out our table plan for our wedding in April 2023. Then came the flurry of pub quiz planning, a strong case made (by me) for why walking the dogs was far more urgent than finishing this article and even a couple of bouts of spring cleaning (if you know me, you’ll know procrastination is definitely in full swing when that happens). There may even have been a holiday spreadsheet involved at one point too! No one </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">needs </span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">a spreadsheet, but there you go!</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Classic procrastination.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Still, I always knew it needed to be finished. The first article unpacked the </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">why</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> behind procrastination: the roots, the reasoning and a fair bit of personal reflection, particularly on the emotional side of things. That was the easy part to write. Well, easier. This one asks:</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> What do we actually do about it?</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> A far trickier question for a procrastinator.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">So, before we get into the how, here’s a quick reminder of where we left off.</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>What causes procrastination? A quick recap of Part 1</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span>Burka &amp; Yuen (2008): </span><strong><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Procrastination-Why-You-What-About/dp/0738211702" target="_blank" rel="noopener">“<em>Procrastination: Why you do it. What to do about it NOW.</em>”</a></strong></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">If you haven’t read it (or can’t remember it &#8211; I had to go back and read it myself), </span><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/beating-procrastination-part-1/"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Part 1</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> was all about understanding what procrastination is and where it comes from</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">. Drawing on the brilliant work of Burka &amp; Yuen in </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Procrastination: Why You Do It, What To Do About It Now</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">, I explored the four key roots of procrastination:</span></p>
<ul>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><b>The Time Root</b><span style="font-weight: 400;"> &#8211; that slightly warped relationship with time, where we convince ourselves something will only take 15 minutes … right up until it doesn’t.</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><b>The Interpersonal Root</b><span style="font-weight: 400;"> &#8211; the influence of our upbringing, our environment and those oh-so-familiar family patterns.</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><b>The Biological Root</b><span style="font-weight: 400;"> &#8211; where our limbic system (the emotional, reactive part of the brain) often hijacks our best-laid plans and our prefrontal cortex just sighs in the background.</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><b>The Emotional Root</b><span style="font-weight: 400;"> &#8211; the most uncomfortable of the lot and the one that hit me the hardest. This is where fear creeps in. Fear of failure, fear of success, fear of being judged, exposed, relied on, left behind, pushed forward … the full emotional buffet.</span></li>
</ul>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">So, with the </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">why</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> in mind, let’s take a look at the </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">how</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">.</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>How to start moving through procrastination</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I’d love to say there’s a one-size-fits-all answer. That there’s a magical method I discovered whilst on a trail run that cured my procrastination overnight and I’ve never looked back. I haven’t though. I do procrastinate and I probably always will.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The reality is, procrastination isn’t something we fix. It’s something we learn to understand. Something we work with rather than battle against. I’ve spent the last few years trying different things, some helpful, some completely ineffective and some just another form of productive avoidance (organising a to-do list using different coloured pens, for example, is </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">not</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> the win it feels like).</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Still, there are a few strategies that do seem to work. They don’t work every time, but they are enough to gently interrupt the cycle and help move things forward when the familiar urge to delay starts creeping in.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">If you struggle with procrastination, why don’t you give these a go?</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><strong>Break big tasks into smaller steps</strong></h3>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">When something feels big, it usually means I’ll avoid it. My brain throws it straight into the “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">too hard</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">” basket, where it sits until the pressure becomes unbearable and I do it in a mad panic while simultaneously resenting everyone and everything around me.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The trick (and this is one of the very few that works reliably) is to shrink it. Make the first step so small that it’s almost laughable.</span></p>
<ul>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Write one sentence.</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Open the document.</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Put your leggings on. You don’t even have to work out, just put them on.</span></li>
</ul>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">This is loosely based on the </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">two-minute rule</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> in behavioural psychology. If something takes less than two minutes, do it. If it’s more complex, start it for just two minutes. The point is not to finish the task. It’s to override the part of your brain that’s convinced it’s impossible.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Once you’re in, you usually keep going. Not always, but more often than not, something shifts.</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><strong>Use the Pomodoro Technique or timed sprints</strong></h3>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I’m not naturally a timer person. I rebel against rigid structure (that’ll be my <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/enneagram/">Enneagram 7</a>). However, I’ve learned that giving myself a set amount of time (e.g. 25 minutes) and then a break, feels manageable. That’s the basis of the Pomodoro Technique and it’s surprisingly effective. It has certainly helped me with assessment writing.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It turns the looming mountain of: </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">write a research paper on Mental Toughness</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> (something I am currently working on) into </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">just work on it for 25 minutes</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">. I don’t have to finish it. I don’t have to get it perfect. I just have to stay with it for that short period (then I can make a cuppa and complain about it to someone). </span><span style="font-weight: 400;"><img src="https://s.w.org/images/core/emoji/15.0.3/72x72/1f60a.png" alt="😊" class="wp-smiley" style="height: 1em; max-height: 1em;" /></span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The psychology behind it is simple: we focus better in short bursts and we’re more likely to start something if the commitment feels light.</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><strong>Try if-then planning (implementation intentions)</strong></h3>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I realise that sounds like something from a productivity podcast, but bear with me. There’s a theory called </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">implementation intentions</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> which basically means creating a clear plan in advance in the following format: “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">If X happens, then I’ll do Y</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">”.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">For example:</span></p>
<ul>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">If it’s 8am, I’ll go for a 20-minute walk.</span></li>
<li style="font-weight: 400;" aria-level="1"><span style="font-weight: 400;">If I finish lunch, I’ll spend 10 minutes replying to emails.</span></li>
</ul>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It seems obvious, but there’s good evidence that this kind of planning increases the likelihood of follow-through, especially when willpower is low. The clearer the cue and the simpler the task, the less room there is for the usual mental negotiation to creep in.</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><strong>Create accountability without pressure</strong></h3>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Now I know a lot of people are not a fan of the public declaration approach. “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Tell everyone you’re running a marathon so you have to do it!</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">” can sound more like a threat than a strategy.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">That said, sharing something with a trusted friend &#8211; someone who knows you well, who won’t guilt-trip you and who will check in with curiosity rather than judgement &#8211; can be really helpful. It creates a gentle nudge and a little momentum.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Back in June, when I came back from the Coaching Advocates roadshow, I messaged my yoga instructor and said: </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“I turn 44 years old on 12 August 2025. There are 50 days left before that. My goal is to complete 44 exercise sessions before then. Please can you support me on this bout of madness?!”</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">. She gladly agreed. It was less about being held accountable in a disciplinary way (though she is good at that too </span><span style="font-weight: 400;"><img src="https://s.w.org/images/core/emoji/15.0.3/72x72/1f609.png" alt="😉" class="wp-smiley" style="height: 1em; max-height: 1em;" /></span><span style="font-weight: 400;">). It was more about breaking the pattern of secrecy that procrastination loves to hide in (e.g. well, if I don’t tell anyone about my challenge, then if I fail, no one will know).</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><strong>Use self-compassion to break the cycle</strong></h3>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">This one sounds obvious, but it can be the hardest. Procrastination is often wrapped up in shame and when we start beating ourselves up for not getting things done, we shut down even more.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Self-compassion is, as it turns out, a far more effective motivator than criticism. Studies show that people who respond to their procrastination with kindness are more likely to move forward than those who berate themselves. It&#8217;s definitely a work in progress for me!</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">So, if you find yourself deep in avoidance, maybe the best thing you can do is pause, take a breath and, rather than asking yourself: </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“How do I fix everything today?”,</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> ask yourself: </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">“What do I need right now to take one small step?”.</span></i></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Just one step. That’s all.</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Final thoughts on how to beat procrastination</strong></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Procrastination isn’t something to conquer. It’s something to understand. Mine still pops up more than I’d like, sometimes dressed as helpful planning, sometimes hidden under tiredness, sometimes wrapped up in old fears I thought I’d left behind.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The difference now is, I see it sooner. I notice the excuses, I know what it’s protecting me from and I have a few more tools in my kit to meet it with curiosity rather than shame.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">If you want to go deeper: </span><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Procrastination-Why-You-What-About/dp/0738211702"><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Procrastination: Why You Do It, What to Do About It Now</span></i></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Procrastination-Why-You-What-About/dp/0738211702"> by Burka &amp; Yuen</a> is still one of the most insightful books I’ve read on the subject. It’s not a hustle manual, but a genuine exploration of the messiness behind the avoidance.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Finally, if you’re currently procrastinating on something while reading this … I see you. Me too.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Maybe just start with five minutes. That’s all.</span></p></div>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/how-to-beat-procrastination-part-2/">How to Beat Procrastination (Part 2): Practical Strategies That Work</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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		<title>Five years of Braving Boundaries: The good, the bad and the “what was I thinking?”!</title>
		<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/five-years-of-braving-boundaries-lessons-learned/</link>
					<comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/five-years-of-braving-boundaries-lessons-learned/#respond</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 17 Mar 2025 13:16:02 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Business Development]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Celebrations & Festivities]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Finding direction and purpose]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Business Growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Business Mistakes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Coaching Business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Corporate Coaching]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Entrepreneurship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Leadership Development]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lessons learned]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[overcoming challenges]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[personal growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Professional Development]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-Employment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[small business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Small Business Advice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[small business lessons]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[work-life balance]]></category>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/five-years-of-braving-boundaries-lessons-learned/">Five years of Braving Boundaries: The good, the bad and the “what was I thinking?”!</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_5 et_section_regular" >
				
				
				
				
				
				
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY FRIEDA LEVYCKY, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/" style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;">BRAVING BOUNDARIES</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5>
<p><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Five years of Braving Boundaries. Five years of building a business from scratch. Five years of learning. And what a journey it’s been!</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Starting a business is an eye-opening experience. It brings up all your strengths, weaknesses, fears and blind spots. It forces you to grow in ways you never expected. These are the biggest lessons I’ve learned over the last five years. If you’re running a business or thinking about starting one, maybe some of these will resonate.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="540" height="540" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-235189" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>I’ve learned that focus changes</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Braving Boundaries started as a coaching business for the legal industry. It made sense. My background was in law and I knew the pressures lawyers faced. But over time I expanded my focus for two reasons.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">First, my corporate experience was broader than just law. Despite being told by business coaches that I needed to niche, I felt stifled by not being able to help a wider audience. Second, I realised I was playing safe by sticking with what I knew. I wasn’t stepping into a broader field because I didn’t feel I had the right. In reality, everything I had learned was transferable.</span></p>
<p><strong>Takeaway:</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> Don’t be afraid to change direction and step away from what you </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">should</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> be doing just because someone told you that’s the right way to do it. Trust yourself and evolve in the way that feels right for you.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="540" height="540" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-235190" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>I’ve learned that you just have to start</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Perfect doesn’t exist. You can spend months refining a programme, tweaking your messaging and waiting for the right time, but you still won’t know if it works until you launch it. By doing so, I’ve learned that some workshops sell out, others flop, some ideas take off, some don’t. The only way to find out is to </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">put it out there</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">.</span></p>
<p><strong>Takeaway:</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> Stop waiting. Just start. You’ll adjust as you go.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Ive-learned-that-you-just-have-to-start.jpg" alt="I&#039;ve learned that you just have to start" title="I&#039;ve learned that you just have to start" class="wp-image-235214" /></span>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="540" height="540" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/3.png" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-235191" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>I’ve learned that quick fixes don’t work</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">When you’re building a business, there is a huge temptation to speed up success. That’s when the “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Make US$10k a month overnight</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">” adverts get you. Even when you know they’re too good to be true, there’s a part of you that wants to believe them.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Much to my own chagrin, I’ve fallen for it. I ignored my gut and paid for a course that sold the dream. I shouldn’t have. It still irritates me because I knew at the time it wouldn’t work. The reality is there are no shortcuts. Just put in the work, grow steadily and know that building something meaningful takes time.</span></p>
<p><strong>Takeaway:</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> If something sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Trust your instincts and don’t waste time chasing quick wins.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="540" height="540" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/4.png" alt="" title="4" class="wp-image-235192" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>I’ve learned that building a coaching business isn’t easy</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_102  et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child">
				
				
				
				
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I’ve had many clients who have benefited from coaching and decided to become coaches themselves. It makes sense. When something profoundly changes your life, you want to share it with others. I felt the same about becoming a counsellor after experiencing the benefits of two years of counselling in my early 30s.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The thing about coaching though, is that it isn’t the easiest business to grow. There are a </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">lot</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> of coaches out there (see point 7 below) and, despite what the <em>“Make</em> <em>US$10k a month</em>” ads claim, it isn’t a “<em>get rich quick</em>” kind of business. You don’t go into coaching because it’s an easy way to make money. You go into coaching because you genuinely want to help people struggle less and succeed more. That’s why so many coaches fold within two years.</span></p>
<p><strong>Takeaway:</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> Coaching is about impact, not instant success. If you’re drawn to it, make sure you’re in it for the right reasons. The business side takes time, effort and patience – but when you’re passionate about what you do, it’s worth it.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Ive-learned-that-building-a-coaching-business-isnt-easy.jpg" alt="I’ve learned that building a coaching business isn’t easy" title="I’ve learned that building a coaching business isn’t easy" class="wp-image-235212" /></span>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="540" height="540" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/5.png" alt="" title="5" class="wp-image-235193" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>I’ve learned that pricing is a psychological battle</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Setting prices as a coach is torture. You spend hours comparing yourself to others, questioning your worth and wondering if you’re charging too much or too little.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">What I’ve learned is that people will pay for what they value. If someone tells you that you’re “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">too expensive</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">” what they actually mean is: “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">it’s too expensive for me</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">” or “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">this isn’t my priority right now</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">” &#8211; and that’s fine. It shouldn’t make you doubt your worth.</span></p>
<p><strong>Takeaway:</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> Charge what reflects your expertise. The right clients will see the value.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="540" height="540" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/6.png" alt="" title="6" class="wp-image-235194" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>I’ve learned that you have to keep studying</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Getting a coaching qualification isn’t the end; it’s just the start. The world is shifting rapidly. AI is developing at speed, workplace challenges are evolving and new theories on human behaviour keep emerging. What worked five years ago doesn’t always work today.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Every client is different. Every team is different. To be a good coach, you have to keep learning, adapting and staying open to new ideas. The moment you think you know it all, well … that’s when you’re in trouble.</span></p>
<p><strong>Takeaway:</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> If you work in a people-focused profession, staying relevant means staying curious. Keep learning.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="540" height="540" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/7.png" alt="" title="7" class="wp-image-235195" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>I’ve learned that coaching should be regulated</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">It still shocks me that anyone can call themselves a coach after a weekend course. No degree, no rigorous training, no board exams – just a certificate and a LinkedIn profile. Meanwhile, counsellors and therapists spend years earning degrees, passing board exams and meeting strict requirements before they can practise.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Yet as coaches, we work with real people facing real challenges. Whether you’re guiding someone through their past or helping them build their future, you’re responsible for their wellbeing. That’s not something to take lightly.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I’m grateful for my 18-month coach training, but even then I chose to study psychology and counselling further. Not everything can be solved with a “<em>just focus on the future</em>” approach. Sometimes people need to unpack what’s holding them back before they can move forward.</span></p>
<p><strong>Takeaway</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"><strong>:</strong> If you’re looking for a coach, do your research. If you’re becoming a coach, take the responsibility seriously. People put their trust in you – make sure you’re qualified to hold it.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="540" height="540" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/8.png" alt="" title="8" class="wp-image-235196" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>I’ve learned that business brings up all your baggage</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Self-doubt, imposter syndrome, fear of failure, you name it! Starting a business drags up everything: </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">Am I good enough? What if people don’t sign up? What if I fail?</span></i></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Running a business means constant change. Change creates uncertainty. Uncertainty fuels fear. The trick is to take small steps and keep going.</span></p>
<p><strong>Takeaway:</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> If you feel overwhelmed, break it down. What do they say about eating an elephant? Take one bite at a time.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Ive-learned-that-business-brings-up-all-your-baggage.jpg" alt="I’ve learned that business brings up all your baggage" title="I’ve learned that business brings up all your baggage" class="wp-image-235213" /></span>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="540" height="540" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/9.png" alt="" title="9" class="wp-image-235197" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>I’ve learned that self-awareness is an ongoing reality check</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">One of the biggest surprises was how much I learned about myself while coaching others and building a business.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I started noticing patterns. How I react under stress. How I have so many ideas but struggle to finish them. How, when I feel overwhelmed, my instinct is to avoid and run.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Just last week my overwhelm levels tipped the scale. Instead of writing everything down on my to-do list and gently working my way through it, I decided to book in a facial and avoid everything for the day! I also managed to justify it easily as self-care (rather than avoidance) – I’m quite a pro at that! </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The irony is, I </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">know</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> that facing things head-on makes life easier. Yet even with all my awareness, old habits still creep in. That’s the thing about self-awareness – it doesn’t mean you magically stop your patterns, but it helps you catch yourself faster and course-correct.</span></p>
<p><strong>Takeaway:</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> Self-awareness is ongoing. Pay attention to your patterns.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="540" height="540" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/10.png" alt="" title="10" class="wp-image-235198" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>I’ve learned that your support squad is everything</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Business can be lonely. Having a group of people at the same stage as you or a few steps ahead makes a huge difference.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">They’ll give you honest feedback, help you see things differently and keep you accountable.</span></p>
<p><strong>Takeaway:</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> Find your people. Business is hard enough without trying to do it alone.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Ive-learned-that-your-support-squad-is-everything.jpg" alt="I’ve learned that your support squad is everything" title="I’ve learned that your support squad is everything" class="wp-image-235209" /></span>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="540" height="540" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/11.png" alt="" title="11" class="wp-image-235199" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>I’ve learned that passion and purpose both matter</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I’m passionate about helping people and teams get unstuck. Seeing those </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">a-ha</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> moments when something finally clicks is what makes this work so rewarding. But passion alone isn’t enough. It’s what gets you started, but it doesn’t always keep you going.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Purpose is what gives passion direction. My purpose is to help people </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">do things differently</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> so they can create successful lives and businesses in a way that actually works for them. That’s what keeps me committed, even on the days when things feel hard.</span></p>
<p><strong>Takeaway:</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> Passion gets you excited about the work, but purpose gives it meaning. If you feel stuck, reconnect with both.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="540" height="540" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/12.png" alt="" title="12" class="wp-image-235200" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>I’ve learned that there is only one </b><b><i>you</i></b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">In business (and especially in coaching), it’s easy to get caught up in comparison. You see other people launching polished online courses, nailing their social media presence or recording twenty engaging videos a week with zero effort. And sometimes, people even pinch your ideas. It’s frustrating, and it has a way of making your inner critic very loud.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">What I’ve learned though is that someone can copy your content, your process or even your business model, but … they can’t be </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">you</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Your unique voice, your perspective, your way of connecting with people are what makes the difference. There are people out there who will choose </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">you</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> because of who you are, not just what you offer.</span></p>
<p><strong>Takeaway:</strong><span style="font-weight: 400;"> Forget the noise. Stop worrying about what others are doing. The people meant to work with you will be drawn to </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">you</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">. Not because you have the fanciest website or the most polished videos, but because of the way you make them feel. And no one else can replicate that.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Ive-learned-that-there-is-only-one-you.jpg" alt="" title="I’ve learned that there is only one you" class="wp-image-235207" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><b>Looking ahead</b></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The learning never stops. These lessons have shaped how I work, coach and grow. Now it’s time to take them forward.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The next five years will be about building, evolving and making an even bigger impact. My dreams and goals for Braving Boundaries (and myself) have been set. Now it’s time to see them unfold.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Here’s to the next 5 years! </span><span style="font-weight: 400;"><img src="https://s.w.org/images/core/emoji/15.0.3/72x72/1f942.png" alt="🥂" class="wp-smiley" style="height: 1em; max-height: 1em;" /></span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/Heres-to-the-next-5-years.jpg" alt="Here’s to the next 5 years!" title="Here’s to the next 5 years!" class="wp-image-235208" /></span>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/five-years-of-braving-boundaries-lessons-learned/">Five years of Braving Boundaries: The good, the bad and the “what was I thinking?”!</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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		<title>My 10-day liver cleanse with Juice Revolution: A journey of self-compassion and transformation</title>
		<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/my-10-day-liver-cleanse/</link>
					<comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/my-10-day-liver-cleanse/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 04 Oct 2024 05:39:49 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Change]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Health]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mid-Life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[clean yourself from inside out]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cleanse]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[detox]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[gallbladder cleanse]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[good health]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[healthy eating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[healthy living]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[juice revolution]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[juicing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kidney detox]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[liver cleanse]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[menopause]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mid-life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[middle age]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[peri-menopause]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-compassion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[take care of yourself]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[transformation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[your body your life]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=6384</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/my-10-day-liver-cleanse/">My 10-day liver cleanse with Juice Revolution: A journey of self-compassion and transformation</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY FRIEDA LEVYCKY, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/" style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;">BRAVING BOUNDARIES</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5>
<p><span style="color: #be9727;"></span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">As I mentioned in last month’s newsletter, after finishing the Braving Change Challenge, I felt like I needed an additional boost to regain control of my energy and overall well-being. Despite increasing my exercise routine, I was still feeling sluggish, weighed down by hormonal swings (hello, peri-menopause!) and a bit disconnected from my body. I wanted to feel more in tune with myself and, let’s be honest, I was also eager to get back a bit more control over my figure. That’s when I decided to embark on a 10-day liver cleanse with </span><a href="https://juicerevolution.co.za/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Juice Revolution</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;"> and I’m so glad I did it.</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The Cleanse Breakdown</strong></h2></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The 10-day cleanse was structured in a way that felt achievable (even though, I’ll admit, I had a few moments of doubt)! Here’s what the process looked like:</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><b>Days 1 to 3: Clean eating and liver stone softening</b></h3></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The first three days were all about clean eating coupled with regular consumption of apple juice to soften liver stones. This phase eased me into the cleanse, giving my body time to adjust to the lighter food load and preparing it for the more intense detox days ahead.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/Liver-detox-cleanse-1-1.png" alt="" title="Liver detox cleanse (1)" class="wp-image-6394" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><b>Days 4 to 6: Juicing  </b></h3></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">These days were filled with delicious juices and soups provided by </span><a href="https://juicerevolution.co.za/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Juice Revolution</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">, and I have to say, they were surprisingly tasty! I didn’t feel deprived of food because the juices were rich in nutrients and had such a variety of flavours that kept things interesting. It was during this phase that I really started to notice a shift in how I felt; lighter, clearer and more in tune with my body. By day 5 though, I hit a bit of a wall. The headache I experienced was intense as the toxins were being released from my body. However, I knew this was part of the process and a necessary step in the detox journey.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Something that really kept me engaged during this phase were the educational videos that explained why we were eating certain foods and taking specific supplements. I’m one of those people who needs to understand the “</span><b>why</b><span style="font-weight: 400;">” behind what I’m doing, rather than just following directions because someone said so. It was fascinating to learn how each element played a role in supporting the cleanse and detoxification process. This knowledge made the whole experience feel more purposeful and kept me motivated.</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><b>Day 5 and Day 10: Colonics!</b></h3></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Now, let’s talk about colonics &#8211; something that I’ve been doing for nearly two decades. I know, I know, many of my friends are horrified at the mere mention of it, but let me tell you, colonics are a game-changer! Sure, the idea of flushing out your insides might not sound like a day at the spa, but it’s an </span><b>incredibly</b><span style="font-weight: 400;"> effective way to support a cleanse. Trust me, we carry around a lot more </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">&#8216;baggage&#8217;</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> than we realise, and colonics help you let go – both literally and figuratively! The results? Well, let’s just say it was a liberating experience and I left feeling </span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">light as a feather</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;"> (and perhaps a few pounds lighter too).</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">If you’ve ever wondered whether we’re all full of &#8230; well, you know, the answer is yes! </span><span style="font-weight: 400;"><img src="https://s.w.org/images/core/emoji/15.0.3/72x72/1f60a.png" alt="😊" class="wp-smiley" style="height: 1em; max-height: 1em;" /></span><span style="font-weight: 400;"> But I promise you, once you’ve done a colonic or two, you’ll be amazed at how much better you feel. Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it!</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><b>Day 6/7: Fasting</b></h3></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">Ah, the infamous fasting day. I never thought I’d drink neat Epsom salts (let alone a grapefruit and olive oil concoction) but I did &#8211; and it worked! To my surprise, the fasting day went way more smoothly than I had anticipated, even though my husband and friends were busy demolishing four pizzas and chicken wings right in front of me! That moment really tested my resolve, but I stayed dedicated to the process and it felt strangely empowering.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/Liver-detox-cleanse-3-1.png" alt="" title="Liver detox cleanse (3)" class="wp-image-6396" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><b>Days 8 to 10: Reintroducing whole foods</b></h3></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">The final three days were about reintroducing whole foods and, interestingly, adding a kidney cleanse to the mix. It was wonderful to bring back solid food, but I was mindful of how my body was responding to every bite. I felt a newfound appreciation for nourishing my body with clean, wholesome ingredients. And the taste of the </span><a href="https://www.lifeshine.co.za/edible-eden-menu" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Edible Eden </span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">Cottage Pie on Sunday night was just sublime!!</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><b>How I felt after the cleanse</b></h3></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">So, let’s talk about the results. It’s safe to say that I feel completely transformed &#8211; both physically and mentally. The energy I was missing is back in full force and my brain feels clearer than it has in months. My skin is glowing, my figure has returned to where I want it to be and perhaps the most surprising benefit of all: I didn’t experience the usual hormonal swing as that time of the month approached. That, in itself, is a huge relief &#8211; not just for me, but for everyone around me!</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">What’s more: my eyes are brighter, my skin feels smooth and I generally feel lighter and more at ease in my body. But beyond the physical changes, this cleanse gave me a much-needed reminder of the importance of </span><b>self-compassion</b><span style="font-weight: 400;">, especially as I navigate the realities of middle age.</span></p></div>
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				<span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/Liver-detox-cleanse-4-Medium.png" alt="" title="Liver detox cleanse (4) (Medium)" class="wp-image-6397" /></span>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><b>Learning self-compassion during middle age</b></h3></div>
			</div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_132  et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light">
				
				
				
				
				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">As we age, our bodies change in ways we can’t always control and that can be tough to accept. I’ve spent most of my life with a good figure, so watching these changes unfold has been challenging for me &#8211; both physically and emotionally. There’s an underlying fear of losing control over something so central to how we perceive ourselves. But what this cleanse taught me is that, while we may not have control over everything, we do have a say in how we care for our bodies.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I’m learning to be more compassionate with myself during this transition period. Rather than fighting against these changes, I’m focusing on what I can do to support my body: regular exercise, weight training and eating healthily (and learning what “</span><i><span style="font-weight: 400;">eating healthily</span></i><span style="font-weight: 400;">” really means). These are all things within my control and they make a huge difference in how I feel day-to-day.</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><b>Why I recommend a liver cleanse</b></h3></div>
			</div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_134  et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light">
				
				
				
				
				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I’m not a doctor or a nutritionist, but from what I’ve learned from experts, taking care of your body from the inside out really does make a difference &#8211; especially as we go through the hormonal changes that come with middle age. A liver cleanse like this one isn’t just about losing weight or getting a &#8216;quick fix&#8217; for feeling sluggish. It’s about resetting, giving your body a chance to detox and allowing it to function at its best. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">This cleanse showed me that I can still feel good in my skin, no matter what age I am. It’s given me renewed energy, clearer skin and a sense of pride in what I was able to accomplish over those 10 days.</span></p></div>
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				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><b>A HUGE thank you</b></h3></div>
			</div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_136  et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light">
				
				
				
				
				<div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">I couldn’t have done this without the incredible guidance of </span><a href="https://juicerevolution.co.za/about-juice-revolution/#founder" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span style="font-weight: 400;">Fiona Stander from Juice Revolution</span></a><span style="font-weight: 400;">. Her support and the delicious juices and soups she provided made the entire process so much easier and, dare I say it, enjoyable. I’m also grateful to my fellow participants. Sharing our experiences and challenges along the way kept me motivated and inspired. We laughed, supported each other and emerged from this journey feeling stronger.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-weight: 400;">To anyone considering a cleanse, I highly recommend it. Not just for the physical benefits but for the mental clarity and self-compassion that comes with it. So, here’s to embracing the changes that come our way and to finding ways to love and care for our bodies through every stage of our lives.</span></p></div>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/my-10-day-liver-cleanse/">My 10-day liver cleanse with Juice Revolution: A journey of self-compassion and transformation</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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		<title>New Year’s Resolutions with a twist (Part 2)</title>
		<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-2/</link>
					<comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-2/#respond</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 16 Dec 2021 23:01:00 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Celebrations & Festivities]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Finding direction and purpose]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[2022]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[be kind]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[big picture]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[celebrate the small stuff]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[celebrations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[connection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[creativity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[direction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[end of year]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[enneagram assessment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[harmony]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[IEQ9]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[keep on track]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kindness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[life goals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mantra]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mindset]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mindset matters]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[motivate me]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[new beginnings]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[new year]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[new year&#039;s resolution]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[optimism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[overcoming overwhelm]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[positivity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[reconnect]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[reflection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-awareness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-reflection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[starting anew]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[stay on track]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[word for the year]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[word of the year]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=3715</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>Keeping your New Year's Resolutions on track. How do you give yourself the best chance at implementing and achieving the changes you desire?</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-2/">New Year’s Resolutions with a twist (Part 2)</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
]]></description>
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<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>By Frieda Levycky of Braving Boundaries and Alicia Koch of The Legal Belletrist</em></strong></h4>



<p>So, how are you holding up at the end of 2021? If you’re anything like us, the end of year can’t come soon enough. After two years of uncertainty – of changed plans, obscure regulations and waves of highs and lows (and not just in the pandemic sense) – we are well and truly in need of a proper break. A time to reflect, relax and re-connect with ourselves and our loved ones.</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/9-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3759"/></figure>



<p>In part 1 of this Article, we spoke about taking a kinder (rather than resolute) approach to making New Year’s Resolutions in 2022. Instead of having a long list of things to accomplish, we encouraged you to identify one word that could be your guiding light for the year.</p>



<p>Did you have a chance to consider the word that encapsulates the changes you want to make in 2022? Ali and I managed to choose ours and here are our reasons why.</p>



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<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>New Year’s Resolution: RE-CONNECT (Frieda’s word)</strong></h2>



<p>For me, 2022 is going to be all about re-connection. As a natural extrovert – someone who is always connecting, socialising, involving and organising – I never imagined being someone who would struggle with connection. However, having easily adapted to working from home and the inevitable reduced in-person interaction in 2020/21, I’ve stopped flexing my “connection muscle”. And, frankly, the thought of group activities, live trainings, networking events and easily reaching out to people one-on-one to connect, has started to cause some feelings of overwhelm and anxiety. The irony is that I coach around this and know everything that I need to do to move through these feelings and fears. The reality is though that, at times, we all fall off track – even coaches &#8211; it’s just part of being human.</p>



<p>So, rather than beating myself up for not making more of an effort to connect in 2021, 2022 is going to be a kinder reintegration into connection again: connection with my family in the UK and Ireland, connection with my existing clients and potential clients, connection with my followers, connection with my industry and connection with myself. That muscle will get re-built, I just need to take the necessary steps to bring about that change.&nbsp;</p>



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<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>New Year’s Resolution: HARMONY (Alicia’s word)</strong></h2>



<p>The word harmony, to me at least, evokes feelings of balance and flow within all the different areas and facets of our lives, and is something I have personally lacked the last couple&nbsp;of years (being an ex-lawyer it is not entirely hard to understand why). Whether it has been changes in my career, challenges with health or disconnection with family (or friends), I have felt my life lacking harmony and balance. I have, often times, felt lost at sea without a life jacket flailing around the waves in panic. When one part of my life has improved, another has suffered. And because of that, I have not felt completely present nor completely at ease.&nbsp;</p>



<p>The beginning of COVID (and start of lockdown) in 2020 marked an enormous change in my life &#8211; both professionally and most certainly personally. And whilst lockdown regretfully had negative ripple effects globally, I found myself slowly coming into my own. I had finally found what I loved to do &#8211; write &#8211; and have successfully made a career out of it. But my health suffered. When my health improved, I found that my personal relationships were negatively affected. It has (very much) been a give and take situation with the important things unfortunately not weighing equally.&nbsp;</p>



<p>Whilst I don’t (yet) have all the answers to how I am practically going to find harmony and balance in my life, I know that it will be the small steps I take every day (keeping my word of the year in mind), that will ultimately improve my life. I will need to make focused, conscious decisions and take deliberate actions, knowing (now) that I need to handle myself with care and kindness. Something we do for others but not always for ourselves.&nbsp;</p>



<p>I am so looking forward to 2022 which I know will be more balanced and more harmonious not only because I will it so, but because I will take the necessary actions to ensure the outcome I have envisaged for myself. Slowly and gently…&nbsp;</p>



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<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>Helping you to keep your New Year’s Resolution on track</strong></h2>



<p>As we said in the <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-1/">previous article</a>, choosing your word is the first step. But how do you give yourself the best chance at implementing that word throughout 2022 and achieving the changes you desire?</p>



<p>Here are a few ideas:</p>



<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Positive Self -Reflection</em></strong></h4>



<p>Once you have chosen your word for the year, think about the areas in your life you would like to improve. This will help you to reflect not only on your past but your present and future as well.&nbsp; What has been working in your favour and what would you like to change? In order to set an achievable goal, you need to have a better sense of where you have been, as well as the direction you are moving towards. It’s also important to acknowledge your most recent accomplishments. When immersed in the hustle and bustle of everyday life, we often forget to reflect on our achievements. Perhaps you have already made positive changes throughout the year without giving these accomplishments much thought. Do that now and ensure you acknowledge what you have achieved.</p>



<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Develop critical self-awareness&nbsp;</em></strong></h4>



<p>Living without self-awareness is like driving your car at night without brakes. Technically, you can still drive, but you will eventually lose control, be unable to stop and have a collision. With self-awareness, you shed light on your destructive, reflexive habits. And by doing so, you are able to eliminate self-sabotaging behaviour. So be aware of them. If you’re interested in finding out more about your motivations, blind spots and defence mechanisms, take a look at <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/enneagram/">the Enneagram</a>.</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/12-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3762"/></figure>



<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Make your goal possible</em></strong></h4>



<p>Make the actions around your word something you will enjoy. For example, choosing “Health” as your word for the year will involve many different actions like becoming more active and eating healthier. But don’t undertake exercises that will make you feel miserable. Don’t put a bowl of fruit on your kitchen counter filled with fruit you don’t like or commit to running a marathon if you hate running. Be conscious about the actions you take to honour your word for the year in a way that ultimately makes you happy.&nbsp;</p>



<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Celebrate the small stuff</em></strong></h4>



<p>The trick is not to become overwhelmed before you get going. Decide the type of person you want to be &#8211; A healthy person? A strong person? A writer? A musician? Then prove it to yourself with small wins over time. Start small and begin with acknowledging all of your small successes on a daily basis.&nbsp;</p>



<p>Start by taking a look at habits that may be holding you back. Find one that is simple and easy to achieve. For example drinking a glass of water every time you are at your kitchen sink. It may not be often but every time you are there you have one glass of water. This will contribute to your overall wellness and health/fitness. It is also not impossible to do. Find small, simple challenges that you can easily make happen and do them. It will feel so good as well.</p>



<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Get creative about it</em></strong></h4>



<p>How can you motivate yourself to stay on track? It is often the visual things that keep us optimistic. So why not get creative with it? Why not create a piece of art (in whatever medium feels good to you) to hang in your home or your office that visually captures your word of the year. Have a little fun with it and focus your energy on that word entirely as you get creative.&nbsp;</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/13-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3763"/></figure>



<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Define what your word means to you</em></strong></h4>



<p>One simple word can capture limitless inspiration and many meaningful feelings. Your own personal definition of what that word means to you will go far beyond what the dictionary has to say about it and will be more meaningful because it is from your own unique perspective. So think about this hard and write it down somewhere that you can refer to when you feel that you have lost your way.&nbsp;</p>



<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Use your word as a mantra&nbsp;</em></strong></h4>



<p>Whether or not you create an affirmation, prayer, statement, or something else that works for you, use your single word as a mantra throughout each day. See it in your mind&#8217;s eye by creating a mental image that captures its meaning and repeat it to yourself every day. Believe in it and know that it is achievable.&nbsp;</p>



<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Cultivate optimism&nbsp;</em></strong></h4>



<p>No one&#8217;s life is positive all the time. But the important thing here is to train yourself to focus on the positives and only briefly acknowledge the negatives. Don&#8217;t let insecurity prevent you from having a positive outlook. Realise it&#8217;s a choice.</p>



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<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Let go of the typical “resolution” mentality</em></strong></h4>



<p>The word of the year process is meant to be a gentle one. But the important thing here is not to confuse gentle with weak. A word for the year is a powerful practice. It is far more effective to focus on a word like &#8220;health&#8221; than to command yourself to get to the gym or to only eat X number of calories a day. As you inspire yourself towards overall good health, it is likely that you will find yourself achieving good health as a byproduct of simply having an overall healthier mindset. So, make sure that your word feels good to you, not pushy, demanding or unachievable.</p>



<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Don&#8217;t sweat the bad days (small stuff)</em></strong></h4>



<p>Just because you have your word for the year and are taking baby steps to achieve your overall goal every day, good habits are extremely hard to develop. And they are really easy to break. Remember change is never easy &#8211; for anyone.&nbsp;</p>



<p>Perfection is impossible. There will be days when you slip and fall, graze a knee or take a tumble. There will be times when you won&#8217;t be able to do what you planned to do. But know that it’s okay &#8211; accept it, own it, and then get back on the new habit horse.</p>



<p>What matters most here is your long term goals. While you might occasionally fail, see a setback as just a setback &#8211; not a reason to give up.&nbsp;</p>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>Remember the Big Picture</em></strong></h2>



<p>Although change is difficult, what’s most important is developing <em>the kind of habits that allow you to achieve that change</em>. Your mindset is crucial in ensuring that your word of the year is honoured in a way that <em>motivates you, encourages you and fulfills you. </em>&nbsp;</p>



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<p>Don’t just wish and hope that all will be well. Take attainable steps that will ensure success. And keep your mind focused on the achievement of the overall bigger picture. A small misstep today should not mark the end of “word”.&nbsp;</p>



<p>While there are, no doubt, still resolution-makers in our midst, we feel it is prudent practice (at least at this point in time) to be kind to ourselves. Whether you’re defining your New Year’s resolutions, choosing your one word to define the whole year, or are choosing to decline the tradition altogether, try your best to maintain positive outlooks and motivation.&nbsp;</p>



<p><em>“Past and Present I know well, each is a friend and sometimes an enemy to me. But it is the quiet, beckoning Future, an absolute stranger, with whom I have fallen madly in love.” &#8211; </em>Richelle E. Goodrich</p>



<p>So, embrace the beckoning future and fall madly in love with it – whether you make resolutions or choose a word of the year, make it your own. Be kind, be gentle, have grace and fall in love with the opportunities that lie ahead of you.&nbsp;</p>



<p>From all of us at <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/">Braving Boundaries</a>, we wish you a Happy, Healthy Festive Season and all the best for 2022.&nbsp;</p>



<p>Frieda &amp; Ali x</p>



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<p>About the writer,&nbsp;<strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong></p>



<p>Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.&nbsp;</p>



<p>Click here to visit&nbsp;<a href="https://www.thelegalbelletrist.com/">The Legal Belletrist website</a>.</p>



<p><strong>Email: <a href="mailto:alicia@thebelletrist.com" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">alicia@thebelletrist.com</a> </strong></p>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-2/">New Year’s Resolutions with a twist (Part 2)</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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		<title>New Year’s Resolutions with a twist (Part 1)</title>
		<link>https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-1/</link>
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		<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 15 Dec 2021 15:23:05 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Celebrations & Festivities]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Finding direction and purpose]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorised]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[2022]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[be kind]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[be kind to yourself]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[chnage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[creating change]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[feeling inspired]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[goal setting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kindness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[melinda gates]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mindset]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mindset matters]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[new beginnings]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[new year]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[new year&#039;s resolution]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[resolution]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[resolutions]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-reflection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[word for the year]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[word of the year]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=3712</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>As 2022 draws nearer, let's take a fresh look at our approach to New Year's Resolutions. How can we be kinder to ourselves this year?</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-1/">New Year’s Resolutions with a twist (Part 1)</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<h4 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>By Frieda Levycky of Braving Boundaries and Alicia Koch of <a href="https://www.thelegalbelletrist.com/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">The Legal Belletrist</a></em></strong></h4>



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<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong><em>New Year’s Resolutions &#8211; they are very resolute aren’t they?</em></strong></h2>



<p>It’s that time of year again – Christmas turkeys have been ordered and champagne is chilling in the fridge. All in preparation for a festive time of the year – boasting promises of hope for the future.&nbsp;</p>



<p>With that, social media is abuzz with positive images and quotes, everything to help gear you towards “achieving your goals” and tackling 2022 with optimism and positivity.&nbsp;</p>



<p>Meme after meme motivating us to become better versions of ourselves. <em>As if we are not good enough already</em>. It can get overwhelming. Especially when there is still so much on our plates – a new COVID variant &#8211; <a href="https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/variants/omicron-variant.html" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Omicron</a>, <a href="https://www.news24.com/health24/medical/infectious-diseases/coronavirus/covid-19-booster-doses-who-needs-them-and-are-they-safe-and-effective-20211213-2" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">booster vaccines</a> and <a href="https://www.za.kayak.com/travel-restrictions" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">travel restrictions</a> – again. To name but a few.&nbsp;</p>



<p>But historically, and as many of us will admit, this is also the time for New Year’s Resolutions. Aaaah, the promises we make to ourselves – <em>to lose weight, to get fit and to find a job that makes us happy.</em> They all sound fantastic in our own heads, especially as we devise plans on how to make them happen. Complex and intricate details around step-by-step improvements that we promise to implement come Day One of the New Year. But are they always realistic?&nbsp;</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/2-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3747"/></figure>



<p>Either way, they do serve to make us feel better as we indulge in a chocolate or two, have a second helping of Christmas lunch or simply lay on the couch binging Netflix. It calms us down as we reflect on our holiday excess and it gives us a sense of hope that this excess can all be forgotten about and done away with. This sort of “buyer’s remorse” for holidays, propels us to make the wild promises to ourselves to “get into shape” as we unwrap a Jaffa cake and turn on the telly.&nbsp;</p>



<p>We have abandoned our restraint (and all reason) but dispel our fears of complete ruin by setting goals to start our new year afresh and completely motivated. We are on holiday after all and excuses to “let go” come easily (and aplenty).&nbsp;</p>



<p>It’s not a bad thing to let go, of course. A little R&amp;R is most certainly needed (particularly after the last two years). But it is the promises around the R&amp;R that are important.&nbsp;</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/3-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3748"/></figure>



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<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>A New Year, a New You?</strong></h2>



<p>It seems like a viscous cycle. Come 1st January &#8211; after a night full of <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=acxnmaVTlZA" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener"><em>“Auld Lang Syne</em></a>”, champagne corks popping and heads aching – gym, yoga or pilates memberships increase at a rapid rate, diets are hastily undertaken and more positive memes are posted on social media. <em>“Out with the old and in with the new”</em> seems to be the general motto with an overall sense of self-improvement (and possible enlightenment) a flurry.&nbsp;</p>



<p>It’s like we all wake up at the start of the new year thinking it will be easy as pie to turn over a new leaf and change everything about ourselves. Cabbage soup diets commence. Carbs and wine become unspoken terms. 5am alarms spur us into action for early morning park runs. And those size 8 jeans that have been embarrassingly hidden in the back of our closets for the last ten years, once again, remerge with the allure of: “You can do this”. And there we find ourselves, starting the New Year determined and brimming with self-belief.&nbsp;</p>



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<p>Inevitably, however (and if the <a href="https://www.inc.com/jeff-haden/a-study-of-800-million-activities-predicts-most-new-years-resolutions-will-be-abandoned-on-january-19-how-you-cancreate-new-habits-that-actually-stick.html" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">surveys</a> are anything to go by), as we settle into the new ebb and flow that is a new year, we become accustomed to a new rhythm and that does not always go hand-in-hand or in sync with the goals we have set for ourselves. All of a sudden, come <a href="https://www.thereisadayforthat.com/holidays/various/quitters-day" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">“Quitters Day”</a> (aka 19 January), our resolutions and what we sought to achieve often seem too far out of reach and are thus abandoned unfulfilled and seemingly meaningless.&nbsp;</p>



<p>This, in turn, leaves us feeling disappointed and disheartened. Like a failure before we’ve even really begun. A recipe for disaster and certainly no good for our self-esteem. We find ourselves in front of the mirror asking:</p>



<p><em>“Why is it that with every good intention, I am unable to get fit, lose weight, save more money or find that so-called “happy job”? </em>(the apparently most highly ranked New Year’s resolutions according to <a href="https://www.statista.com/statistics/378105/new-years-resolution/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">Statista</a>). <em>Why does improving my life seem so elusive?”</em></p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/5-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3752"/></figure>



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<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>It’s not the resolution, it’s you</strong></h2>



<p>Perhaps it’s the word “resolution” that instills fear of under-achievement in all of us. It is a very intimidating, demanding word – the finality and seriousness of it. It’s like something you “must do”, “have to do” &#8211; with seemingly no room for failure.</p>



<p>According to the Oxford English Dictionary, a Resolution means –&nbsp;</p>



<p><em>“a firm decision to do or not to do something”.</em></p>



<p>It’s the <em>firm decision</em> part that has a way of doing us all in.&nbsp;</p>



<p>But you see, it’s not the resolution itself that is doomed to fail, like dieting or exercising. It’s your mindset that encourages you to “change” that is most likely at fault. In order to succeed with a goal, you need to change the way you think in order to sustain the motivation to succeed. Unless you change your mindset, your health goals or financial goals will not magically materialise. You need to put in the mental effort first.&nbsp;</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="768" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/6-1024x768.jpg" alt="" class="wp-image-3753"/></figure>



<p><strong><em>Change in and of itself is a scary concept.</em></strong><strong> </strong>It involves, at least to a certain degree, a certain amount of emotional strain which in turn can lead to stress, overall discomfort, anxiety, feelings of failure and sometimes depression. Change is not easy for anyone. And that difficulty can lead to a degree of self-sabotage.&nbsp;&nbsp;</p>



<p>So, the next logical question is this – <strong><em>how do we change this “setting yourself up to fail” cycle?</em></strong></p>



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<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>New Year’s Resolutions with a twist</strong></h2>



<p>Take Melinda Gates as an example. Melinda does not make New Year’s resolutions. While she does resolve to change, instead of having a list of “resolutions”, she chooses <a href="https://www.cnbc.com/2019/01/02/melinda-gates-doesnt-make-new-years-resolutions-heres-what-she-does-instead.html" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">a single word</a> to bring her guidance and clarity. She has said that the power of a well-chosen (and focused) word makes the year better, gives her clarity on what she wants to achieve and helps her to focus on an overall (and often continuing) goal. It is a gentler approach and alternative to a long list of resolutions which encourages growth and optimism despite setbacks.&nbsp;</p>



<p>As we look back on the last two years, we realise that having a long list of resolutions that are perhaps unattainable (simply because the world is so full of uncertainty at the moment) is <a href="https://www.dispatch.com/story/lifestyle/health-fitness/2021/01/01/experts-say-go-easy-2021-new-years-resolutions-theyre-ok-even-skip/6539824002/" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">not necessarily the kindest thing to do to ourselves</a>. Instead, we believe we need to dig a little deeper and find something that encapsulates everything we want to achieve and then take small, daily steps to get closer to that goal.&nbsp;</p>



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<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>A different approach for 2022</strong></h2>



<p>This New Year we believe it is ok to take it a little easier on yourself. Rather than creating a long list of things to accomplish, we encourage you to:&nbsp;</p>



<ol class="wp-block-list"><li><strong>Identify the changes you want to make</strong> in 2022 and how those changes will benefit your life as a whole.&nbsp;</li><li>Then <strong>choose one word</strong> that fully encapsulates the changes you want to make in 2022. Let that be the word that becomes your guiding light for the year.</li></ol>



<p>Finding your word is just the start. But it’s the beginning of a journey that will gently get you to where you want (and need) to be.&nbsp;</p>



<p>Take a read of Part 2 of this Article to gain some insight into how you can turn that one word into a year’s worth of action. Released on Friday, 17 December 2021.</p>



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<p>About the writer,&nbsp;<strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong></p>



<p>Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.&nbsp;</p>



<p>Click here to visit&nbsp;<a href="https://www.thelegalbelletrist.com/">The Legal Belletrist website</a>.</p>



<p><strong>Email: <a href="mailto:alicia@thebelletrist.com" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">alicia@thebelletrist.com</a> </strong></p>
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<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/new-years-resolutions-with-a-twist-part-1/">New Year’s Resolutions with a twist (Part 1)</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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		<title>Braving Boundaries – Slotting life’s puzzle into place</title>
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		<dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 24 Nov 2021 11:10:52 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Comfort over coffee]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Finding direction and purpose]]></category>
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					<description><![CDATA[<p>Life is a puzzle: sometimes easy, sometimes hard. Are you ready to brave your boundaries and slot those pieces into their rightful place?</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/braving-boundaries-slotting-lifes-puzzle-into-place/">Braving Boundaries – Slotting life’s puzzle into place</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p>
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<p><strong>Life has been compared to many things. A book with chapters that close behind us as others open. A mountain: hard to climb, but worth the view. There’s even Forrest Gump and his well-known “life is like a box of chocolates” analogy.&nbsp;</strong></p>



<p><strong>For me though, life is like a puzzle.</strong></p>



<p>One of those big puzzles with thousands of pieces of featureless forest or open sky. And to make things harder, you’ve lost the lid of the box and have no idea what you’re building.</p>



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<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>THE EARLY YEARS</strong></h2>



<p>Unsure of what we’re building, we start off with the easiest part—the border—setting up the boundaries of this as-yet-unknown picture. School. Higher education. Our first job. Our first relationship. This is a time in our lives when the world has seemingly limitless opportunities, and we confidently slot in piece after piece, full of enthusiasm as we look forward to figuring out where we’re headed.</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="800" height="600" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/11/life-is-a-puzzle-1.jpg" alt="Braving Boundaries – Slotting life’s puzzle into place" class="wp-image-3654"/></figure>



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<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>REALITY SETS IN</strong></h2>



<p>But what do we do once that border is complete and, faced with all those endless pieces of non-descript forest, our enthusiasm and progress begin to wane? When life becomes an endless cycle of rinse and repeat: get up, work all day, gym, come home, eat, TV, sleep…what then?&nbsp;</p>



<p>Maybe you choose to walk away from the puzzle, leaving it unfinished, and just accept that this is your life.</p>



<p>Or you start working on completing small sections within the bigger puzzle. Perhaps you get lucky and find a piece that unlocks a new section of the puzzle, when life serves up a new opportunity. The chance to move abroad. A new job offer. A new relationship.</p>



<p>And so you start building these sections, adding piece after piece until your progress dwindles again. That new opportunity that had seemed to hold such promise isn’t the puzzle-unlocking key you thought it was.&nbsp;</p>



<p>Like all experiences in life, it has a place in your puzzle, and is necessary to complete the whole picture of your life, but it’s in the wrong place. You’re left with a section that, while complete in itself, just won’t click into other sections to form a bigger picture.&nbsp;</p>



<figure class="wp-block-image size-full"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="800" height="600" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/11/life-is-a-puzzle2.jpg" alt="Braving Boundaries – Slotting life’s puzzle into place" class="wp-image-3655"/></figure>



<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>BRAVING BOUNDARIES</strong></h2>



<p>At this point, we find ourselves at the proverbial fork in the road. If we want to make progress on our life puzzle, we have to choose one of two paths.</p>



<ol class="wp-block-list"><li>We can force this section into the puzzle, wanting so badly for it to fit that we jam it in, ignoring the niggling feeling that it’s <strong><em>just not right</em></strong>. We’re so focused on keeping those ill-fitting pieces in place, that we ignore all the other pieces—the other aspects of our lives—that are waiting to be developed.</li></ol>



<ol class="wp-block-list" start="2"><li>Or we find the courage to go back and take another look at those pieces.&nbsp;</li></ol>



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<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><strong>BRAVING CHANGE</strong></h2>



<p>Change is never easy, especially when it requires us to revisit our past choices.&nbsp;</p>



<p>It takes courage to acknowledge that something is wrong in our lives.&nbsp;</p>



<p>It requires trust that we’ll be able to find the correct place to replace that wrongly positioned piece, giving it the correct importance in our lives.&nbsp;</p>



<p>It needs a willingness to go back and switch out the mismatched pieces, making changes where needed.</p>



<p>It also means dealing with the discomfort that comes from turning our attention to something new as we work on a new section of the puzzle.</p>



<p>While change isn’t easy, it’s often necessary, or you’ll be left with a mountain of unplaced pieces and the sinking feeling that maybe you’ll never be able to complete your life puzzle.&nbsp;</p>



<p>If that’s how you’re feeling, as if your life is a jumbled-up puzzle with no hope of ever being completed, then know that it doesn’t have to be like this. You can make a change.&nbsp;</p>



<p>All it takes is for you to be brave enough to take that first step.</p>



<div class="wp-block-image"><figure class="aligncenter size-full"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="800" height="600" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/11/life-is-a-puzzle3.jpg" alt="Braving Boundaries – Slotting life’s puzzle into place" class="wp-image-3656"/></figure></div>



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