<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?><rss version="2.0" xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/" xmlns:wfw="http://wellformedweb.org/CommentAPI/" xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/" xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom" xmlns:sy="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/syndication/" xmlns:slash="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/slash/" > <channel> <title>Braving Boundaries</title> <atom:link href="https://bravingboundaries.com/feed/" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" /> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/</link> <description>PROFESSIONAL LIFE COACHING & TRAINING</description> <lastBuildDate>Thu, 07 May 2026 15:58:41 +0000</lastBuildDate> <language>en-ZA</language> <sy:updatePeriod> hourly </sy:updatePeriod> <sy:updateFrequency> 1 </sy:updateFrequency> <image> <url>https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/03/Asset-1.svg</url> <title>Braving Boundaries</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/</link> <width>32</width> <height>32</height> </image> <item> <title>Honesty, Boundaries and the Generation Gap</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/honesty-boundaries-and-the-generation-gap/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/honesty-boundaries-and-the-generation-gap/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Thu, 07 May 2026 13:53:13 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Communication]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Corporate Wellness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Leadership]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Work life]]></category> <category><![CDATA[communication]]></category> <category><![CDATA[corporate wellness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[effective communication]]></category> <category><![CDATA[lessons learned]]></category> <category><![CDATA[team communication]]></category> <category><![CDATA[work life]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Working environment]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235659</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/honesty-boundaries-and-the-generation-gap/">Honesty, Boundaries and the Generation Gap</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_0 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_0"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_0 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_0 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY FRIEDA LEVYCKY, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/" style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;">BRAVING BOUNDARIES</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5> <p><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></p> <p class="western">A few weeks ago, something happened that I have not been able to stop thinking about. I was due to get on a call with a service provider, but, that morning, the call was cancelled because of illness. No problem, these things happen. We rescheduled for the following day and joined the call as planned. I asked, as you do, whether they were feeling better and it was what came next that caught me completely off guard:</p> <p class="western"><i>“Yes, much better thanks. We had an off-site last week and I was pretty tired and not really feeling it yesterday, so I moved the call.”</i></p> <p class="western">Now, I want to be honest with you: my face probably twitched. Those of you who know me will know that my face has never been particularly good at hiding what my brain is thinking. However, what was far more interesting than my expression was what was happening <i>inside</i> my head. Two very distinct voices were clearly in combat at exactly the same time.</p> <p class="western">The coach in me said: “<i>Hmm. OK. They took a mental health day. It is a generational thing. Keep an open mind.”.</i></p> <p class="western">The lawyer in me said something considerably less measured, which I will summarise as: “<i>You actually thought that was an appropriate thing to say to a client?”.</i></p> <p class="western">There it was. The generational gap, playing out in real time. Not between me and the service provider, but between the two parts of me.</p> <p class="western">Before we explore this further, take a moment to think how you would react. Are you with my coach’s voice or my lawyer’s voice?</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_1 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Why did I react so viscerally?</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_0"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img fetchpriority="high" decoding="async" width="1500" height="1125" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/Senior-manager-discussing-work-with-younger-colleague-View-more-by-lechatnoir-from-Getty-Images-Signature.jpg" alt="Senior manager discussing work with younger colleague View more by lechatnoir from Getty Images Signature" title="Senior manager discussing work with younger colleague View more by lechatnoir from Getty Images Signature" class="wp-image-235687" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_2 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="western">Before I point any fingers, I think it is worth sitting with that question honestly.</p> <p class="western">I was trained, professionally and personally, in an era where you did not bring your personal life into a client relationship. You showed up and you delivered. If you were having a bad day, a difficult week or a full-blown crisis, that was managed privately and it did not become your client’s problem to absorb. The boundary between the personal and the professional was clear and crossing it, particularly in the direction of a client, was simply not done.</p> <p class="western">That is not a generational flaw. It produced a great deal of reliability, accountability and mutual respect. It also, I will admit, produced a <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/prioritising-self-care-in-a-demanding-work-environment/">great deal of suppression, burnout and people falling apart behind closed doors</a> because asking for help felt like weakness.</p> <p class="western">So, when I heard that explanation, my visceral reaction was not purely about professionalism. It was also the echo of a system I was shaped by bumping up against a system that is being actively dismantled by the generation coming through. That’s a positive. I mean, it’s something I am actively trying to change.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_3 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Is honesty always a virtue?</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_4 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="western">Here is where it gets genuinely interesting because I do believe in honesty. <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/faqs/">It is one of the values that sits at the heart of everything I do</a>.</p> <p class="western">Honesty, though, is not a single, undifferentiated thing. There is the honesty that builds trust and the honesty that transfers your discomfort onto someone else. There is the honesty that is brave and the honesty that is, perhaps, a little careless.</p> <p class="western">When you tell a client that you cancelled a call because you were tired and not feeling it, you are being honest. You are also, whether you intend to or not, making them the custodian of information they did not ask for and cannot really do anything useful with. It subtly shifts the dynamic. It puts them in the position of having to decide how to feel about it, whether to say something, whether to be concerned or irritated or sympathetic. That is a lot to hand someone in a professional relationship.</p> <p class="western">The question I keep returning to is this: <i>who does that honesty serve?</i></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_5 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The Mental Health Day debate</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_1"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="1500" height="1125" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/Woman-Thinking-View-more-by-Yaroslav-Shuraev-from-The-Yaroslav-Shuraev-Collection.jpg" alt="Woman Thinking View more by Yaroslav Shuraev from The Yaroslav Shuraev Collection" title="Woman Thinking View more by Yaroslav Shuraev from The Yaroslav Shuraev Collection" class="wp-image-235689" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_6 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="western">Several countries have moved to enshrine the concept of the “Mental Health Day” formally. In the Netherlands, the approach to sick leave has long included mental and emotional wellbeing as valid grounds for absence, without the requirement to produce a medical certificate. Australia’s personal and carer’s leave provisions similarly cover mental health. New Zealand has led the way on wellbeing-related leave more broadly. The direction of travel globally is unambiguous. We are moving towards a world that takes mental health as seriously as physical health … and that is the right direction.</p> <p class="western">The existence of a right, however, does not automatically come with a roadmap for how to exercise it thoughtfully (particularly when clients are involved).</p> <p class="western">If you work in a service environment, your clients have made commitments based on your availability. They may have prepared, cleared time in their diary or arranged their own team around your meeting. When that falls away at short notice, there is a knock-on effect. Taking a mental health day is entirely reasonable. Doing so in a way that is planned around your commitments, communicated with appropriate notice and without a level of personal detail that puts the client in an awkward position, that is where the responsibility lies.</p> <p class="western">The right to the day and the responsibility for how you take it are two separate conversations and we often conflate them.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_7 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Is this a generational mismatch or simply a professional one?</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_8 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="western">I have gone back and forth on this more times than I can count. Part of me wonders whether I am simply old and whether this is exactly the kind of situation where I need to update my thinking rather than reach for the comfort of: “<i>that is not how things are done</i>“. Younger generations have grown up in a world where mental health is discussed openly, where vulnerability is not weakness and where bringing your whole self to work is actively encouraged. These are genuinely positive shifts.</p> <p class="western">There is, however, a distinction that sometimes gets lost in that conversation, which is the difference between <i>internal</i> culture and <i>external</i> relationships.</p> <p class="western">Within a team, within an organisation, the norms around honesty about wellbeing, around naming when you are struggling and around creating <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/workplace-ostracism-addressing-the-intangible-office-bully/">psychological safety</a>, these can and should be progressive. Managers and leaders have a real responsibility to build environments where people feel they can say: “<i>I am not doing well today</i>” without fear of judgement or consequence.</p> <p class="western">The client relationship is a different animal. Not because clients are less important than colleagues, but because the nature of the contract is different. A client is not there to support your development. They are there because they need something from you and they have made themselves vulnerable by trusting you to deliver it. That dynamic calls for a different kind of care.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_9 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>What does this mean for Leaders and Teams?</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_2"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="1500" height="1125" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/Woman-Leading-a-Meeting-View-more-by-Monkey-Business-Images.jpg" alt="Woman Leading a Meeting View more by Monkey Business Images" title="Woman Leading a Meeting View more by Monkey Business Images" class="wp-image-235688" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_10 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="western">If you manage people, particularly across generations, this scenario is almost certainly going to land on your desk at some point, if it has not already.</p> <p class="western">Here are the questions I think are worth considering:</p> <p class="western"> <ul> <li><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/work-life-balance-time-matters/"><strong>Have you had the explicit conversation?</strong></a> Many teams assume their people know where the professional line sits with clients. Often, they do not. Not because they are careless, but because the line has genuinely shifted and nobody has drawn it clearly. Do not assume. Have the conversation.</li> <li><strong>Are you managing up as well as managing down?</strong> If your team takes a mental health day, what is the plan for client commitments that day? Who is managing the communication and the rescheduling? A wellbeing-positive culture does not mean the client becomes collateral damage. Building that responsibility into the conversation is part of what it means to lead well.</li> <li><strong>Are you distinguishing between the right and the execution?</strong> You can fully support someone’s right to take time for their mental health and still give them feedback on how they communicated it to a client. Those are not contradictory positions. In fact, holding both at once is exactly what good leadership looks like.</li> <li><strong>Are you examining your own reaction?</strong> As I sat with my twitching face and my warring inner voices, what I realised is that my discomfort was telling me something useful, not just about the other person, but about my own assumptions, my own conditioning and the ways in which I still have some updating to do. That is not comfortable, but it is valuable.</li> </ul></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_11 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Where does the line sit now?</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_12 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="western">What I do think is that the line has moved and that is not inherently a problem. What creates problems is when the line moves without anyone in the room agreeing on where it now sits. When one person is operating from the old map and another from the new one and nobody has noticed the discrepancy, you get exactly the kind of jarring situation I experienced on that call.</p> <p class="western">The solution is not to go back to a world where nobody was allowed to be human at work. Nor is it to abandon all professional discretion in the name of authenticity. It is to have the explicit, sometimes uncomfortable, conversations about what we expect of each other across generations, across roles and in the different contexts in which we operate.</p> <p class="western">That, in my view, is where the real work lies.</p> <p class="western"><i>What do you think? Have you experienced a situation like this, either as the person reacting or the person who said something that landed differently than you expected? I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments below.</i></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_3"> <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/book-a-call/"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/Mailshot-CTA-images-1.png" alt="" title="Mailshot CTA images (1)" class="wp-image-235684" /></span></a> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_divider et_pb_divider_0 et_pb_divider_position_bottom et_pb_space"><div class="et_pb_divider_internal"></div></div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_1 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_13 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><em>Frieda Levycky is the Founder of Braving Boundaries, a coaching and training practice based in Cape Town. She works with individuals and teams to navigate change, build self-awareness and create healthier, more effective ways of working together.</em></p></div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/honesty-boundaries-and-the-generation-gap/">Honesty, Boundaries and the Generation Gap</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/honesty-boundaries-and-the-generation-gap/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>The Messy Middle: Why Self-Awareness Feels Hard</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-messy-middle-why-self-awareness-feels-hard/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-messy-middle-why-self-awareness-feels-hard/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Sat, 25 Apr 2026 15:59:06 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Change]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Finding direction and purpose]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Personal Growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Career Growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[confidence]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Emotional intelligence]]></category> <category><![CDATA[executive coaching]]></category> <category><![CDATA[high achievers]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Leadership Development]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mindset]]></category> <category><![CDATA[personal growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[professionals]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Workplace Communication]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235610</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-messy-middle-why-self-awareness-feels-hard/">The Messy Middle: Why Self-Awareness Feels Hard</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_1 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_2"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_2 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_14 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></strong><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></h5> <p><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></p> <p class="p1"><i>Many professionals look successful on the outside while feeling stuck, reactive or disconnected on the inside. This article explores why self-awareness can feel uncomfortable, why growth often gets messy before it gets better and how honest reflection and boundaries can lead to stronger leadership, healthier relationships and lasting change.</i></p> <p class="p1">Hello, my fellow high functioning, “bulletproof” professionals. Let’s have a seat – metaphorically speaking, of course, because standing makes it easier to flee when things get too real. If you’re reading this, you’ve likely survived another week of pretending you have it all together while your internal monologue is a chaotic mix of a business strategy and a silent scream into the vast, empty void.</p> <p class="p1">In the world of Braving Boundaries, we’re diving into self-awareness (catch up on more posts about <a class="underline underline underline-offset-2 decoration-1 decoration-current/40 hover:decoration-current focus:decoration-current" href="https://bravingboundaries.com/category/change-2/">boundaries and change</a>). But we aren’t doing the “sparkly Pinterest quote” version where you find your inner light while wearing linen pants on a beach. No. We’re doing the version that feels like finding a cockroach in your designer handbag – shocking, slightly nauseating, somewhat curious and utterly impossible to unsee.<strong></strong></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_15 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Why most people think they are self-aware</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_4"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1249" height="937" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Woman-Looking-at-Her-Reflection-in-a-Broken-Mirror-View-more-by-Artmim-from-Getty-Images.jpg" alt="Woman Looking at Her Reflection in a Broken Mirror View more by Artmim from Getty Images" title="Woman Looking at Her Reflection in a Broken Mirror View more by Artmim from Getty Images" class="wp-image-235651" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_16 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">Before we get personal, let’s look at the numbers. They’re deliciously, darkly grim. According to research by organisational psychologist <a href="https://tashaeurich.com/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1">Dr. Tasha Eurich</span></a>, 95% of people believe they are self-aware. We all think we’re the hero of the story, the “self-actualised” leader, the person who “gets it”.</p> <p class="p1">It makes us feel good about our own existential crises.</p> <p class="p1">However, the reality is a cold bucket of water – only <b>10% to 15% of people actually meet the criteria</b>. That’s a cold hard reality smack to the face if you ask me. Ego bruised and our perfectly curated delusion smashed like Avo on toast.</p> <p class="p1">That means about 85% of the people you meet today – your boss, your spouse, the person cutting you off in traffic – are walking around in a cloud of blissful, dangerous ignorance. They are unknowingly stepping on toes, alienating colleagues and repeating the same three mistakes like a glitching NPC in a video game.</p> <p class="p1">If you currently feel uncomfortable, itchy in your own skin or suddenly unsure of your “vibe”, congratulations! You’ve likely stumbled out of the delusional 95% and into the “Messy Middle”.</p> <p class="p1">Just like Neo you took the red pill and now there’s no going back. It’s a cramped, confusing place with terrible snacks, but at least the lighting is more honest. Eeeuw! Overhead lighting. I look far better in dimly lit rooms – you know – with “atmosphere” and intrigue.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_17 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The professional mask high-achievers wear</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_5"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1250" height="937" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Woman-leading-a-business-presentation-at-a-conference-event-View-more-by-Jacob-Lund-Photography-from-Jacob-Lund.jpg" alt="Woman leading a business presentation at a conference event View more by Jacob Lund Photography from Jacob Lund" title="Woman leading a business presentation at a conference event View more by Jacob Lund Photography from Jacob Lund" class="wp-image-235650" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_18 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">As someone who has spent years perfecting the art of being “bulletproof” (albeit with a very chic bulletproof vest), I know the struggle. In the professional world, we’re taught that admitting a struggle is a death sentence for your reputation. We wear our high-functioning anxiety like a tailored blazer – it’s stiff, it’s expensive and it hides the fact that we can’t breathe. Almost like a corset, without the fabulous figure-hugging silhouette.</p> <p class="p1">I remember a specific season of my life where I thought I was being “assertive, clear and efficient”. I was the hero of my own corporate thriller – fearless, climbing mountains, swimming with metaphorical mermaids. Mermaids exist, ok? Then, a “loving critic” (someone who actually likes me but doesn’t mind watching me squirm for my own good) pointed out that my “clear communication” actually felt like a deposition to everyone else in the room.</p> <p class="p1">Shock! Horror!</p> <p class="p1">They told me that when I entered a meeting, people didn’t feel “led”, they felt “interrogated”. As if! I’m a delight.</p> <p class="p1">That moment of awareness didn’t feel like a “breakthrough”. It didn’t feel like a weight that was lifted off my shoulders. It felt like abject humiliation. It felt like I’d been walking around with spinach in my teeth for a decade while giving speeches on dental hygiene. This is the <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-ghost-in-the-corner-office-grieving-the-life-you-thought-youd-have/"><span class="s1">“Ghost in the Corner Office”</span></a> (see last month’s article) – the jarring tension between who we thought we were and who we actually are.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_19 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The Anatomy of Corporate Purgatory</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_6"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1250" height="937" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Aerial-View-of-a-Green-Hedge-Maze-View-more-by-meydiiqbal-from-Gambar-Iqbal-Meidi-hapsal.jpg" alt="Aerial View of a Green Hedge Maze View more by meydiiqbal from Gambar Iqbal Meidi hapsal" title="Aerial View of a Green Hedge Maze View more by meydiiqbal from Gambar Iqbal Meidi hapsal" class="wp-image-235655" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_20 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">This brings us to the broader realisation – the Messy Middle isn’t just about your personality. It’s about the work itself. It’s that distinctive, agonising stretch of time where the initial adrenaline of “Innovation!” has evaporated, replaced by the realisation that you’re now professionally obligated to see this through to the bitter end.</p> <p class="p1">In the beginning, everything was beautiful. You had a slide deck with high-resolution stock photos of people pointing at glass walls. You had a budget that hadn’t been reduced by a round of unforeseen integration costs.</p> <p class="p1">You had <i>hope</i>.</p> <p class="p1">But now? You are in the thick of it. The “vision” has been replaced by a spreadsheet with 47 tabs, and the only thing “disrupting” your industry is your own rising blood pressure and a caffeine habit that would concern a cardiologist.</p> <p class="p1">The Messy Middle is the phase where reality finally catches up to your ambition and demands its pound of flesh. In the business world, this is often misdiagnosed as “poor planning”. In reality, it’s simply the point where the complexity of a task finally outweighs the novelty of starting it.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_21 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Why growth often feels worse before it feels better</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_22 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">We’ve been sold a lie that personal and professional growth is a linear, upward trajectory. We think it’s – <i>Ignorance </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> Epiphany </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> Success.</i></p> <p class="p1">Wrong!</p> <p class="p1">In reality, the process of self-awareness looks much more like – <i>Ignorance </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> Horrified Realisation </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> Existential Crisis </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> The Messy Middle </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> Tiny Bit of Clarity </i><span class="s1">→</span><i> More Horrified Realisation.</i></p> <p class="p1">It’s so fun!</p> <p class="p1">Increased self-awareness and project maturity bring discomfort because they destabilise your internal status quo.</p> <p class="p1">But here are some reasons why it may feel like you’re failing when you’re actually winning –</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_3 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_3 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_7"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-1486" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_4 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_23 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>The Death of the Avatar – </strong>you have to kill the “Professional Avatar” you built – the one that’s never flustered and always has the answer. Letting it go feels like mourning. But it’s so very freeing.</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_4 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_5 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_8"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-1487" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_6 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_24 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>The Feedback Loop of Doom –</strong> real progress requires external feedback. Hearing that your “passion” looks like “aggression” stings. It makes you want to delete your LinkedIn and move to a farm with mini goats and fluffy cows, daisies growing wild all around you. But …</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_5 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_7 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_9"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_8 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_25 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>The “What” vs. “Why” Trap – </strong>asking “Why” leads to a rumination spiral. Asking “What is happening right now?” leads to observation. But “What” is terrifying because it requires you to look at your behaviour without the shield of an excuse. I sometimes hide behind the cuteness that is my Georgia Peach. Because if you can still see my rubbish behind the adorable fluff ball in front of you, then what I’m selling truly does stink.</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_6"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_9 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_26 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Repair Mode: Awareness in Action</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_10"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1250" height="937" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Writing-in-a-notebook-with-a-pen-in-hand-View-more-by-Lina-Darjans-Images.jpg" alt="Writing in a notebook with a pen in hand View more by Lina Darjan's Images" title="Writing in a notebook with a pen in hand View more by Lina Darjan's Images" class="wp-image-235652" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_27 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">Once you’ve sat in the discomfort and realised that you aren’t the infallible G-d-Queen of the boardroom (I know, it’s a surprise to me too), you enter the most critical phase – <b>Repair Mode</b>.</p> <p class="p1">Self-awareness without repair is just a fancy way of being a self-aware jerk. Repair Mode is the bridge between <i>knowing</i> you’re difficult – or that your project is failing – and <i>actually changing</i> the impact you have on others. It’s where the rubber meets the road and usually, that road is covered in broken glass. So, stepping lightly is usually a good idea. I’d leave the stilettos behind if I were you.</p> <h3 class="p1"><b><i>Step 1: The Tactical Apology (Not the Ego-Stroking One)</i></b></h3> <p class="p1">Repair starts with acknowledging the impact, not the intent. Nobody cares if you “intended” to be helpful when you actually just spoke over them for twenty minutes. Repair Mode sounds like – <i>“I realised that, in our last meeting, I dominated the conversation and didn’t leave room for your input. I’m working on my self-awareness and I’m sorry for the impact that had on the team”.</i></p> <p class="p1">Let’s not go down the same road as Jose Mourinho during his “self-aware” <a href="https://www.google.com/search?q=i+appologise+but+i+apologise+to+an+idiot+soccer+coach&sca_esv=4074d84388868a32&rlz=1C1AVFC_enZA990ZA990&sxsrf=ANbL-n6YC_6SOX3ewkvjBMSMTCpsGYbFyA:1776333090835&ei=IrHgadLYMoeFhbIPudOayQY&biw=1098&bih=457&ved=0ahUKEwjS8Ya3jPKTAxWHQkEAHbmpJmkQ4dUDCBE&uact=5&oq=i+appologise+but+i+apologise+to+an+idiot+soccer+coach&gs_lp=Egxnd3Mtd2l6LXNlcnAiNWkgYXBwb2xvZ2lzZSBidXQgaSBhcG9sb2dpc2UgdG8gYW4gaWRpb3Qgc29jY2VyIGNvYWNoSNQfUPkFWKMacAF4AJABAJgB7AKgAeMdqgEGMi0xMS4yuAEDyAEA-AEBmAIBoAILwgIOEAAYgAQYsAMYhgMYigXCAgsQABiABBiwAxiiBMICCxAAGLADGKIEGIkFmAMA4gMFEgExIECIBgGQBgqSBwExoAenGrIHALgHAMIHAzMtMcgHCYAIAA&sclient=gws-wiz-serp#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:450a2854,vid:ofL054wxBXc,st:0" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1">apology</span></a>.</p> <h3 class="p1"><b><i>Step 2: Closing the Gap</i></b></h3> <p class="p1">Repair Mode requires you to close the gap between your perception and theirs. This means asking for real-time course correction. Tell your team – <i>“I know I have a tendency to micromanage when I’m stressed. If you see me doing it, please use the code word ‘Oxygen’. It’ll help me reset”.</i> This gives others permission to help you stay aware. Just remember you gave your team and/or partner this permission – don’t go biting the messenger.</p> <h3 class="p1"><b><i>Step 3: Self-Forgiveness (The Hard Part)</i></b></h3> <p class="p1">You cannot repair a relationship if you’re drowning in self-loathing. If you’re constantly beating yourself up, you become the “victim” again and suddenly the conversation is about <i>your</i> feelings instead of the people you hurt. Repair requires you to be stable enough to hold space for others.</p> <p class="p1">So, pull up your socks and put your “big girl panties” on!</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_28 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Redefining progress in the Messy Middle</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_11"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1250" height="937" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Stepping-stones-on-a-garden-path-View-more-by-Horia-Ionescus-Images.jpg" alt="Stepping stones on a garden path View more by Horia Ionescu's Images" title="Stepping stones on a garden path View more by Horia Ionescu's Images" class="wp-image-235648" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_29 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">In the Messy Middle, you must learn to find “micro-victories”. We used to joke that specialists found joy in a perfectly placed semicolon in a 400-page contract. Because semantics matter. Apparently. But, in the broader business world, it’s about <i>Milestones of Survival</i>.</p> <p class="p1"> <ul class="ul1"> <li class="li1">Did you make it through a Monday without a “quick sync” that lasted four hours? <i>That’s progress.</i></li> <li class="li1">Did you successfully survive another meeting where “synergy” was offered instead of a functional database? <i>That’s a win.</i></li> <li class="li1">Did you manage to keep your internal monologue from becoming your external dialogue? <i>That’s</i> p<i>romotion material.</i></li> </ul></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_30 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Setting boundaries at work: The brave “No”</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_31 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">This is where boundaries go to die. Because you’re desperate for a sense of forward motion, you’re tempted to say “Yes” to every distraction, hoping one of them is the magic bullet. This is a lie. Self-awareness is what helps you recognise when you are overcommitting, people-pleasing or mistaking exhaustion for ambition. True “Braving Boundaries” means having the audacity to protect your focus –</p> <p class="p1"> <ul class="ul1"> <li class="li1"><b>The Calendar Boundary – </b>marking yourself as <i>“Busy: Strategic Analysis”</i> for four hours just to do your job, while everyone else assumes you are in a very high-powered meeting about “Leveraging Assets”.</li> <li class="li1"><b>The Emotional Boundary –</b> recognising that a project’s “messiness” isn’t a reflection of your worth. Your value cannot be measured by deadlines, deliverables or this quarter’s spreadsheet.</li> </ul></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_32 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Why growth happens in difficult seasons</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_12"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1250" height="937" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Rain-in-the-city-View-more-by-Chalabala-from-Getty-Images.jpg" alt="Rain in the city View more by Chalabala from Getty Images" title="Rain in the city View more by Chalabala from Getty Images" class="wp-image-235654" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_33 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">Here’s the dark, satirical truth – the finish line is overrated. Once you finish, you just get a bigger, messier project as a “reward” for your competence. The Messy Middle is where the actual growth happens – mostly because you’re too exhausted to maintain your professional facade.</p> <p class="p1">It’s in the middle that teams actually bond (usually over a shared frustration with the new project management software). It’s where processes get lean (because you literally don’t have the energy for the “fluff” anymore). It’s where true leadership is forged (or at least, people who can keep a straight face while explaining a 200% budget overrun are identified for future executive roles).</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_34 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>4 survival tactics for overwhelmed professionals</strong></h2></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_7 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_10 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_13"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-1486" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_11 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_35 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Lower the Bar –</strong> not for quality, but for your expectations of “perfection”. You’re looking for “functional and not currently on fire.”</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_8 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_12 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_14"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-1487" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_13 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_36 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Find Your “Personal Board of Advisors” –</strong> the 2-3 colleagues you can text at 10:00 PM to ask, <i>“Is it just me, or is this whole initiative actually a social experiment?”</i></p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_9 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_14 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_15"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_15 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_37 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Acknowledge the Hallucination –</strong> just as AI has “hallucinations”, corporate strategies have them too. When the plan stops making sense, stop following the plan.</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_10 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_16 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_16"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/4.png" alt="" title="4" class="wp-image-1489" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_17 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_38 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Practice Strategic Apathy – </strong>care deeply about the outcome, but care very little about the “noise”. You’re the mountain. A very tired, slightly cynical mountain.</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_11"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_18 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_39 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p>If your team is stuck in the Messy Middle together, our <a class="underline underline underline-offset-2 decoration-1 decoration-current/40 hover:decoration-current focus:decoration-current" href="https://bravingboundaries.com/corporate-creative-workshops-seminars/">corporate workshops</a> are built for exactly this.</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_12"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_19 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_40 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Here’s to the Elite (and the Exhausted)</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_17"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1250" height="937" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Happy-beautiful-woman-laughing-while-holding-coffee-View-more-by-YakobchukOlena-from-Getty-Images.jpg" alt="Happy beautiful woman laughing while holding coffee View more by YakobchukOlena from Getty Images" title="Happy beautiful woman laughing while holding coffee View more by YakobchukOlena from Getty Images" class="wp-image-235647" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_41 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">At <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/"><span class="s1"><b>Braving Boundaries</b></span></a>, we’ve realised that the most “elite” professionals aren’t the ones with the cleanest desks. They’re the ones who can sit in the middle of a chaotic, half-finished, over-budget disaster and calmly ask,<i> “Ok, what’s the next small step?”</i><i></i></p> <p class="p1">We’re eternally grateful for the Messy Middle. Without it, we wouldn’t need sophisticated technology, high-level strategic consulting or three double espressos before 9:00 AM. We’d just be people with good ideas and no way to execute them.</p> <p class="p1">So, here’s to the orchestrators of the chaos, the survivors of the “mid-project slump” and the professionals who still haven’t figured out why their automated workflows are sending invoices to the office cat.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_42 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Ready to brave your boundaries?</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_43 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">If this article made you feel slightly attacked, incredibly seen or just deeply uncomfortable – good. That’s the first step toward a version of you that doesn’t need a cardboard cutout to survive the day.</p> <p class="p1">But you don’t have to navigate the “Messy Middle” or the “Repair Mode” alone. If you’re ready to trade your armour for actual, sustainable growth, it’s time to talk to a professional who knows how to navigate these trenches.</p> <p class="p1"><strong><span class="s1"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/contact-me/"><i>Contact</i></a></span><i> Frieda Levycky at Braving Boundaries.</i></strong><b><i></i></b></p> <p class="p1"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/my-story/">Frieda</a> specialises in helping professionals navigate the complex, often messy world of self-awareness, emotional intelligence and sustainable growth. Whether you’re a lawyer, a CEO, an overworked Executive or just someone tired of their own excuses, Frieda provides the sounding board you need to move from “horrified realisation” to “meaningful change”.</p> <p class="p1"><b>Explore <a class="underline underline underline-offset-2 decoration-1 decoration-current/40 hover:decoration-current focus:decoration-current" href="https://bravingboundaries.com/work-with-me/individual-coaching/">individual coaching with Frieda</a> — designed for professionals who are done performing and ready to do the real work.</b></p> <p class="p1">Stop pretending you’re bulletproof. Start being real. The view from the 15% is much better – even if it takes a little discomfort to get there.</p> <p class="p1"> <p class="p2"><span class="s2"><i>(Sources used and to whom we owe thanks – </i><a href="https://skillpath.com/blog/self-awareness-is-the-strongest-predictor-of-leadership-success" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Skillpath</i></span></a><i>; LinkedIn </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/posts/tashaeurich_think-youre-self-aware-odds-are-youre-activity-7361475393603715072-eYRk/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a><i>, </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/my-three-biggest-self-awareness-lessons-researcher-tasha-eurich/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a></span><span class="s3"> </span><span class="s2"><i>and </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/google-decodes-messy-middle-buying-process-g-david-dodd/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://www.successpodcast.com/show-notes/2020/5/20/you-arent-actually-self-aware-with-tasha-eurich#:~:text=She%2520is%2520the%2520New%2520York,Understanding%2520how%2520people%2520see%2520us." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Success Podcast</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://www.forbes.com/sites/jeffkauflin/2017/05/10/only-15-of-people-are-self-aware-heres-how-to-change/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Forbes</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://hbr.org/2018/01/what-self-awareness-really-is-and-how-to-cultivate-it" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Harvard Business Review</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://medium.com/mind-cafe/why-introspection-isnt-the-best-way-to-self-awareness-140b8492e6fe" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Medium</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://katedejong.com/the-self-awareness-gap/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Kate de Jong</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://tim.blog/2018/09/13/scott-belsky/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Tim Ferriss</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://www.ted.com/talks/tasha_eurich_increase_your_self_awareness_with_one_simple_fix" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>TED Talks</i></span></a><i> and </i><a href="https://www.tech4law.co.za/news-in-brief/local/taking-stock-part-i/#:~:text=We%2520all%2520look%2520forward%2520to,happens%2520to%2520all%2520of%2520us.&text=But%2520what%2520does%2520that%2520quote,the%2520Forrest%2520for%2520the%2520trees." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Tech4law</i></span></a><i>). <span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></i></span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_18"> <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/book-a-call/"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/Mailshot-CTA-images.png" alt="" title="Mailshot CTA images" class="wp-image-235639" /></span></a> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_divider et_pb_divider_1 et_pb_divider_position_bottom et_pb_space"><div class="et_pb_divider_internal"></div></div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_13 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_20 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_19"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_21 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_44 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p> <p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:alicia@thebelletrist.com" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">alicia@thebelletrist.com</a> </strong></div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-messy-middle-why-self-awareness-feels-hard/">The Messy Middle: Why Self-Awareness Feels Hard</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-messy-middle-why-self-awareness-feels-hard/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>The Ghost in the Corner Office: Grieving the Life You Thought You’d Have</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-ghost-in-the-corner-office-grieving-the-life-you-thought-youd-have/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-ghost-in-the-corner-office-grieving-the-life-you-thought-youd-have/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Thu, 26 Mar 2026 06:43:25 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Change]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Lawyer Life]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Lessons Learned]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Life after Law]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Personal Growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[authentic living]]></category> <category><![CDATA[burnout and recovery]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Burnout and transition]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Career identity]]></category> <category><![CDATA[career transition]]></category> <category><![CDATA[High achiever pressure]]></category> <category><![CDATA[high achievers]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Identity shift]]></category> <category><![CDATA[leadership identity]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Life Transitions]]></category> <category><![CDATA[personal growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Professional change]]></category> <category><![CDATA[professional identity]]></category> <category><![CDATA[redefining success]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235581</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-ghost-in-the-corner-office-grieving-the-life-you-thought-youd-have/">The Ghost in the Corner Office: Grieving the Life You Thought You’d Have</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_2 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_14"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_22 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_45 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5> <p><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></p> <p class="p1"><i>Many professionals reach a point where life looks successful on paper but feels different on the inside. This tension between who we thought we would become and who we are today often brings a subtle form of grief that few people talk about. Alicia Koch explores this experience with honesty, humour and insight.</i></p> <p class="p1">Let’s perform a quick autopsy on your twenty-two-year-old self. You remember them, right? That bright-eyed, over-caffeinated specimen of pure, unadulterated potential? They had a Five-Year Plan etched in stone – probably in a very expensive Moleskine – and a wardrobe that screamed “<i>I have never experienced a lumbar spasm or a panic attack in a bathroom stall”.</i></p> <p class="p1">They knew exactly where they were going – the corner office, the partner track, the perfectly curated offspring, and a lifestyle that looked less like a frantic scramble for sanity and more like a high-end neutral-toned linen advertisement.</p> <p class="p1">And then, life happened.</p> <p class="p1">Not the cinematic, tragic kind of life – though there’s plenty of that – but the slow, grinding, bureaucratic reality of existing.</p> <p class="p1">Now, here you are. Maybe you’re the CEO of a company that consumes your soul like a Dementor at an all-you-can-eat buffet. Maybe you’re a lawyer who realised that <i>Suits</i> was a filthy, stylish lie and real practice is mostly just discovery disputes and high-functioning alcoholism. Maybe you’re a stay-at-home mother wondering why your master’s degree is currently being used as a coaster for a lukewarm cup of apple juice.</p> <p class="p1">Or maybe you’re like me.</p> <p class="p1">I used to be a lawyer. I had the degree, the path, and the crushing weight of billable hours that felt like a slow-motion car crash. Today, I am the owner and founder of <a href="https://thelegalbelletrist.com/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1">The Legal Belletrist</span></a>, the proud mother to four cats, and a woman who has traded courtrooms for a keyboard and a very complicated relationship with my own immune system.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_46 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The Great “Absolutely Not” Moment</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_20"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/03/verworked-Asian-woman-falls-asleep-on-desk-with-paperwork-lapto-View-more-by-nuttapong-punna-from-nuttapong-punnas-Images.png" alt="Overworked Asian woman falls asleep on desk with paperwork, lapto View more by nuttapong punna from nuttapong punna's Images" title="verworked Asian woman falls asleep on desk with paperwork, lapto View more by nuttapong punna from nuttapong punna's Images" class="wp-image-235601" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_47 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">Let’s talk about the “Breakdown.” Or the “Burnout.” Or, as I prefer to call it, <i>The Tuesday My Soul Resigned Without Giving Two Weeks’ Notice.</i></p> <p class="p1">There I was, a high-functioning cog in the legal machine, staring at a stack of documents so dry they could have been used as kindling in a rainforest. My brain felt like a browser with forty-seven tabs open, three of them were frozen, and one was playing circus music that I couldn’t find to turn off.</p> <p class="p1">I was a “Success Story” by every societal metric, yet I was sitting in my car in the office parking lot, weeping over a lukewarm granola bar because I couldn’t remember if I’d fed the cats or if I’d just dreamed about feeding the cats. Or worse if the cats were real.</p> <p class="p1">That was the moment the “Absolutely Not” arrived. It wasn’t a whisper, it was a roar. It was the realisation that if I had to draft one more contract or sit through one more meeting where “synergy” was used unironically, I might actually spontaneously combust.</p> <p class="p1">I quit. I walked away from the path I’d spent a decade paving. And then? The hollow hit.</p> <p class="p1">You know that feeling? It’s the gut-level <i>“What Now?”</i> And it’s the silence that follows when you stop running on a treadmill you didn’t even want to be on. I sat in my house – with the four cats who, for the record, were perfectly well-fed – and felt like a hollowed-out pumpkin in mid-November. I was Alicia Koch, Lawyer. Without the “Lawyer,” I was just Alicia Koch, <i>Woman Who Is Very Good At Crying In Parking Lots.</i></p> <p class="p1">And then, the genius hit. Or rather, it tripped over me.</p> <p class="p1">I started writing. Not legal briefs. Not “Whereas” and “Heretofore.” Just… words. It was like my brain had been a pressurised steam cooker and someone finally flipped the valve. Out came the wit, the satire, the observations of a life lived in the trenches of the billable hour. I looked at the screen and thought, <i>Where the hell did that come from? Was this in there the whole time?</i><i></i></p> <p class="p1">Suddenly, The Legal Belletrist wasn’t just an idea, it was a lifeline. It was the “something else” I never saw coming because I was too busy staring at the corner office. I realised I could either wither in the shadow of who I <i>thought</i> I should be, or I could make hay while the sun shone – even if that sun was mostly illuminating cat hair on my sofa.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_48 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The Ghost of the “Better” You</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_21"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/03/man-looking-at-pixelated-reflection-of-himself.png" alt="man looking at pixelated reflection of himself" title="man looking at pixelated reflection of himself" class="wp-image-235600" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_49 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">This is what I mean by subtle grief. It’s not the explosive, Hallmark-movie sorrow of a sudden loss. It’s the low-frequency hum of the life you <i>didn’t</i> live. It’s the mourning of a version of yourself that never actually existed outside of your imagination.</p> <p class="p1">It’s the Executive who looks at their private jet and feels a pang of longing for the starving artist they promised they’d be back in undergrad. It’s the woman who chose not to have children, standing in a quiet, pristine kitchen, feeling the phantom weight of a choice she doesn’t regret but still feels the need to acknowledge. It’s the person struggling with a body that has turned into a traitor – hello, <a href="https://autoimmune.org/autoimmune-awareness-month/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1">Autoimmune Awareness Month</span></a> – grieving the effortless mobility they once took for granted before their cells decided to stage a mutiny.</p> <p class="p1">This isn’t dissatisfaction. It isn’t regret. You can love your life, your cats, and your career, and still feel the sting of the <i>“Alternative Me”</i>. You can be objectively successful and still feel like a ghost is haunting your achievements.</p> <p class="p1">We are taught to “pivot” and “hustle.” We are told to “manifest” our dreams by shouting at the universe until it gives in. But nobody tells us how to hold a funeral for the dreams that died of natural causes.</p> <p class="p1">We just pack them into the basement of our psyche and wonder why we feel so heavy when we’re walking up the stairs (for the record that could just be my immense unfitness talking).</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_50 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The Corporate Martyr and the Domestic Saint</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_22"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/03/Female-CEO-at-desk-View-more-by-Pressmaster-from-Getty-Images.png" alt="" title="Female CEO at desk View more by Pressmaster from Getty Images" class="wp-image-235599" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_51 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">Whether you are a high-flying CEO or a man living alone with a sourdough starter kit and a subscription to a gym you only visit in your recurring nightmares, we all share this – <strong>the gap between the expectation and the evidence.</strong></p> <p class="p1">For the professionals, the grief is often wrapped in gold leaf. You reached the summit, only to find the air is thin and the view is mostly just other exhausted people pretending they aren’t dizzy. You grieve the passion you traded for a pension. You grieve the version of you that didn’t have to check emails during your sister’s wedding.</p> <p class="p1">For the parents – and those of us who took a different exit on the motherhood highway – the grief is visceral. To the stay-at-home mothers – you love them, obviously, but you might grieve the woman who could leave the house with nothing but a lipstick and a sense of spontaneity, rather than a diaper bag that weighs more than a small planet. To the women who chose not to be mothers, or those of us still trying, or those whose path simply didn’t lead there – we enjoy the sleep and the freedom, but we might grieve the “normality” the world insists we’re missing out on.</p> <p class="p1">And for those of us dealing with the “invisible” battles – the depression that feels like walking through waist-deep molasses, or the autoimmune flare-ups that turn a simple Tuesday into an Olympic feat of endurance – the grief is about <strong>identity</strong>.</p> <p class="p1">Who are you when you can’t “produce” at 110%? Who are you when your body says “no” while your ambition is screaming “KEEP GOING”?</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_52 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Why Sarcasm is a Valid Coping Mechanism (Until it Isn’t)</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_23"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/03/Person-Sitting-on-Rocks-in-Nature-Malmedy-View-more-by-Maarten-Ceulemans-from-Pexels.jpg" alt="Person Sitting on Rocks in Nature, Malmedy View more by Maarten Ceulemans from Pexels" title="Person Sitting on Rocks in Nature, Malmedy View more by Maarten Ceulemans from Pexels" class="wp-image-235604" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_53 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">We use wit and sarcasm to shield ourselves from the earnestness of this pain. It’s easier to make a joke about being a “cat lady” or having a “mid-life rebrand” than it is to sit down and say, <i>“I am sad that I am not who I thought I’d be, even though I quite like who I am”. </i>For real.</p> <p class="p1">Sarcasm is the armour of the burnt-out. It’s the language of the CEO who hasn’t slept since the Obama administration and the lawyer who has forgotten what sunlight looks like. But armour is heavy. Eventually, you have to take it off to see where you’re bleeding.</p> <p class="p1">But the truth really is – your “unmet expectations” aren’t failures. They are the shedding of a skin that no longer fits.</p> <p class="p1">Even snakes probably feel a bit chilly and vulnerable when they leave their old selves behind on a rock.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_54 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The Beauty of the “Wrong” Life</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_55 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">My life isn’t the one I initially picked. I didn’t sign up for the autoimmune “party” or the mental health hurdles that make some days feel like I’m trying to climb Everest in flip-flops. But in the space where the “Power Lawyer” used to be, something more authentic grew. A writer. A business owner. A human being who understands that <strong>showing up</strong> – even if you’re showing up in pyjamas with a cat on your lap – is the bravest thing you can do.</p> <p class="p1">If you are currently at the end of your tether, looking at the frayed rope and wondering if you should just let go, listen closely – The tether was an illusion!</p> <p class="p1">The grief you feel for your “ideal self” is actually a sign of life. It means you still have the capacity to imagine. It means you have a heart that remembers its desires. The goal isn’t to kill the grief. No. It’s to invite it to tea, acknowledge its presence, and then tell it to sit in the corner while you get on with the business of living the life you actually have.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_56 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The Evolution of Identity</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_24"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/03/Identity-problem-View-more-by-numbeos-from-Getty-Images-Signature.png" alt="" title="Identity problem View more by numbeos from Getty Images Signature" class="wp-image-235598" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_57 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">We are not static objects. We are not “finished” when we hit thirty, forty, or sixty. Your identity is a liquid, not a solid. It pours itself into the containers life provides. Sometimes the container is a boardroom, sometimes it’s a doctor’s office, sometimes it’s a quiet house with four cats and a deadline.</p> <p class="p1">The subtle grief comes when we try to force our liquid selves back into the old, cracked jars of our youth.</p> <p class="p1">March is Autoimmune Awareness Month, a time for awareness of our bodies, our health, and the silent struggles we carry. <strong>But let’s also make it a month for identity awareness</strong><b>. </b></p> <p class="p1">Let’s stop pretending that we are all “crushing it” and acknowledge that some days, the only thing we are crushing is our own spirit trying to meet impossible standards.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_58 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Making it the Best Darn Thing</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_59 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">It may not be the life you initially picked. You might be tired, you might be aching, and you might be wondering where that twenty-two-year-old with the Moleskine went. But the version of you that exists right now – the one who has survived the disappointments, the burnouts, and the “what ifs” – <strong>is much more interesting than the person you imagined you’d be!</strong> Honestly.</p> <p class="p1">The person you imagined was a cardboard cutout. The person you are is a masterpiece of scar tissue, resilience, and hard-won wisdom.</p> <p class="p1">So, here is the deal – you’re allowed to mourn the life you didn’t have. You’re allowed to be sad about the parts of yourself that didn’t make the cut. But once you’ve had a good cry (and perhaps a very sarcastic rant to your pets), you have to look at the life you <i>are</i> living.</p> <p class="p1"><span class="s1"><i>Make it the best darn thing you’ve ever seen. Not because it’s perfect – it’s clearly a mess – but because it’s yours.</i></span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_60 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Are you tired of hauling the luggage of who you thought you’d be?</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_61 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">If you are struggling with unmet expectations, evolving priorities, or the shifting sands of your<b> </b>identity, you don’t have to navigate the fog alone. Frieda Levycky of <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/"><span class="s1">Braving Boundaries </span></a>specialises in helping professionals, executives, and anyone at the end of their tether navigate these messy transitions.</p> <p class="p1">It’s time to stop grieving the ghost and start living the life you’ve actually got. <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/contact-me/"><span class="s1">Contact </span></a>Frieda Levycky at Braving Boundaries today to help shape the identity you were always meant to have.</p> <p class="p1">It may not be the life you picked, but we can make it the best darn thing ever!</p> <p class="p2"><i>(Sources used and to whom we owe thanks – </i><a href="https://whatsyourgrief.com/grieving-who-i-used-to-be/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>What’s your grief</i></span></a><i>). <span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></i></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_25"> <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/book-a-call/"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/03/Mailshot-CTA-images.jpg" alt="" title="Mailshot CTA images" class="wp-image-235596" /></span></a> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_divider et_pb_divider_2 et_pb_divider_position_bottom et_pb_space"><div class="et_pb_divider_internal"></div></div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_15 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_23 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_26"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_24 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_62 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p> <p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:alicia@thebelletrist.com" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">alicia@thebelletrist.com</a> </strong></div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-ghost-in-the-corner-office-grieving-the-life-you-thought-youd-have/">The Ghost in the Corner Office: Grieving the Life You Thought You’d Have</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-ghost-in-the-corner-office-grieving-the-life-you-thought-youd-have/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>The Identity Purgatory – Surviving the “New Year, New Me” Glitch of 2026</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/navigating-change-new-year-new-me/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/navigating-change-new-year-new-me/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Thu, 29 Jan 2026 12:54:43 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Change]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Finding direction and purpose]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Mid-Life]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Personal Growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[change]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Emotional resilience]]></category> <category><![CDATA[midlife reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[personal insight]]></category> <category><![CDATA[redefining yourself]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[slowing down]]></category> <category><![CDATA[sustainable change]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235554</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/navigating-change-new-year-new-me/">The Identity Purgatory – Surviving the “New Year, New Me” Glitch of 2026</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_3 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_16"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_25 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_63 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5> <p><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></p> <p class="p1">It is January 2026, and the collective vibe is less “sparkling fresh start” and more “just trying to keep the engine from smoking.” We are officially back at our desks, staring at cursors that blink with judgmental rhythm, trying to remember how to be productive members of society. Let’s be real – 2025 was a total junkyard of a year – a chaotic pileup of weird weather, weirder politics, and personal hurdles that felt less like “growth” and more like an obstacle course designed by a sadist.</p> <p class="p1">But here we are. It’s the Year of the Fire Horse, the seventh sign in the 12-year cycle of the Chinese zodiac, that practically screams, “Giddy up, we have places to be!” Yet, for many of us, there’s a problem. You’ve outgrown your old self – that person who tolerated that specific job, those draining habits, or that particular way of moving through the world. Problem is, your new identity hasn’t actually arrived in the mail yet. You’re living in a psychological studio apartment with no furniture and a weird smell. Eeeuw!</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_64 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The Liminal Space – Where Your Old Self Goes to Die (Slowly)</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_65 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><blockquote> <p><i>A liminal space is the “betwixt and between” state—a threshold where you have left one room but haven’t quite entered the next. Derived from the Latin word limen (meaning “threshold”), it describes a period of transition where normal rules and fixed identities are suspended.</i></p> </blockquote> <p class="p2">This isn’t about being indecisive or “losing your spark.” This is what psychologists call a liminal space – the threshold between “what was” and “what is next.” According to research on identity transition, this middle phase is often characterised by a loss of “identity anchors,” which can lead to significant distress (Ibarra, 2003).</p> <p class="p2">As someone who navigates the world with a “triple threat” of diagnosed anxiety, depression, and an autoimmune condition that turns my joints into rusty hinges whenever I’m stressed, I can tell you – this in-between phase is a nightmare for the nervous system. My anxiety wants a 5-year plan, my autoimmune system wants a nap, and my family issues want a therapist on 24-hour retainer.</p> <p class="p2">When you’ve outgrown a version of yourself, the old coping mechanisms stop working. For me, that meant “powering through” (the old me’s specialty) started resulting in physical flare-ups that made me feel like I’d been hit by a very small, very targeted truck. You realise the old “you” was a suit of armour that’s now three sizes too small. You’re hulking out of it, and it’s deeply embarrassing.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_66 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The Humour of the Void</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_27"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/01/office-chair-with-loading-post-it.jpg" alt="Metal door View more by pixbox77 from Getty Images" title="office chair with loading post it" class="wp-image-235575" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_67 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">We have to laugh, because if we don’t, we’ll end up sobbing into a bowl of lukewarm oatmeal. There is something objectively funny about being a “Self in Progress.” It’s like being a website under construction in 1998 – lots of yellow “Caution” tape and a spinning “Loading” icon that never seems to finish.</p> <p class="p1">We are often our own worst critics during this transition. We think, <i>“Why haven’t I figured out my new passion yet?”</i> or <i>“Why do I feel like a stranger in my own life?”</i> The truth is identity isn’t a light switch – it’s a slow-cooker. Research in self-determination theory suggests that forcing an identity before it’s ready leads to “introjected regulation” – basically, you’re just performing a role because you think you should, which is the fast track to burnout (Ryan & Deci, 2000). And that’s far from ideal.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_68 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Advice from the Trenches – How to “Horse” When You Feel More Like a Snail</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_69 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p2">Since 2026 is the Year of the Horse, and Mark Twain famously said, <i>“The secret of getting ahead is getting started,”</i> we do eventually have to move. But “starting” doesn’t mean you need to have the finished map. It just means you need to stop sitting in the wreckage of 2025. So, –</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_17 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_26 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_28"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-1486" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_27 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_70 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Lower the Bar</strong><b> –</b> if you’re dealing with health or mental struggles, your “forward momentum” might just be putting on clean socks. That counts. Believe me. In the Year of the Horse, even a slow trot is better than being stuck in the mud.</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_18 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_28 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_29"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-1487" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_29 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_71 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Embrace the “I Don’t Know”</strong><b> –</b> tell people, <i>“I’m in a transition period.” </i>It sounds fancy shmancy and uber professional, like you’re a corporate merger instead of a person who forgot how to have a personality.</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_19 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_30 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_30"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_31 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_72 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Go with the Flow (With Direction)</strong><b> –</b> sometimes the best way to find the new “you” is to stop looking for them and start doing things that don’t make you feel like garbage. Follow the path of least (internal) resistance.</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_20"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_32 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_73 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Leaving Old Habits Behind</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_31"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/01/woman-walking-away-from-the-cocoon-she-has-been-in-smiling-serene.jpg" alt="" title="woman walking away from the cocoon she has been in, smiling, serene" class="wp-image-235576" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_74 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">If you get to the point where you decide that the time has come to once and for all leave your old habits behind, figuring out which ones to leave behind is less about a dramatic “purge” and more about an investigative audit of your current life.</p> <p class="p1">Here is a step-by-step guide to identifying which old habits no longer fit the version of you that’s currently loading –</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_21 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_33 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_32"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-1486" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_34 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_75 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Conduct a “Pattern Audit” of Your Stress</strong> – don’t look at your best days. Look at your worst. As ugly as they may be. Research suggests that our “default identity” – the one we snap back to under pressure – is where our most outdated habits live – </p> <ul class="ul1"> <li class="li1"><i>The Step</i> – after a tense moment, ask yourself: <i>What did I feel? What did I do? What was I trying to protect?</i><i></i></li> <li class="li1"><i>The Goa</i>l – identify if you are habitually defaulting to being the “avoider,” the “perfectionist,” or the “people-pleaser” just to survive. </li> </ul></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_22 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_35 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_33"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-1487" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_36 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_76 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Monitor Your “Energy Leaks” </strong><b>– </b>pay attention to which routines feel like a “suffocating cage” rather than a stable foundation – </p> <ul class="ul1"> <li class="li1"><i>The Step</i> – spend three days tracking your response to common triggers. Note if a habit (like scrolling for hours or over-committing) leaves you feeling drained rather than energised.</li> <li class="li1"><i>The Goal</i> – if a habit feels “hollow” even after you’ve rested, it’s a psychological clue you’ve outgrown it. </li> </ul></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_23 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_37 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_34"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_38 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_77 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Use the “Identity Vote” Method </strong>– think of every action as a vote for the person you want to be (this is a good one) –</p> <ul class="ul1"> <li class="li1"><i>The Step </i>– write down 1 – 3 “identity statements” for your 2026 self (e.g., “I’m someone who prioritises peace”).</li> <li class="li1"><i>The Goal</i> – look at your daily habits. If a habit – like checking work emails at 11 PM – is a “vote” for your 2025 stressed-out self, it’s time to put it on the chopping block. </li> </ul></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_24 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_39 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_35"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/4.png" alt="" title="4" class="wp-image-1489" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_40 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_78 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Differentiate Between Procrastination and Growth </strong><b>– </b>sometimes we think we’re failing at a habit when we’ve actually just outgrown the goal it was serving – </p> <ul class="ul1"> <li class="li1"><i>The Step</i> – ask yourself – <i>do I need more structure to do this (procrastination), or do I need the space to stop doing it entirely (growth)?</i><i></i></li> <li class="li1"><i>The Goal</i> – if the goal itself no longer excites you, the habit supporting it is just “noise” you can safely drop in 2026. </li> </ul></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_25 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_41 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_36"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/5.png" alt="" title="5" class="wp-image-1490" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_42 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_79 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Create “Identity Bridges”</strong> – instead of trying to vanish an old habit overnight, build a bridge to a new one (this is sometime far less pressurising) – </p> <ul class="ul1"> <li class="li1"><i>The Step</i> – replace, don’t just remove. If your old habit was “saying yes out of guilt,” your identity bridge is “checking in with myself for 60 seconds before answering any request”.</li> <li class="li1"><i>The Goal</i> – this reduces the “cognitive dissonance” of trying to be a whole new person while still living in your old reality. </li> </ul></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_26"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_43 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_80 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Trust the Glitch</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_81 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">If you feel like you’re failing because you aren’t “rebranded” by January 31st, give yourself a break. Seriously. <b>You aren’t a failure</b>. You’re just moulting. And like a crab without a shell, you’re currently soft, vulnerable, and probably a bit cranky (change – any change – makes most of us cranky).</p> <p class="p1">Healthy development requires the absence of clarity. You cannot see the new horizon until you’ve cleared the fog of the old one. So, while 2026 demands we move forward, remember that a horse doesn’t just gallop. It also grazes, rests, and occasionally looks at a fence and thinks, <i>“Not today mon cherie.”</i><i></i></p> <p class="p1">Be kind to the version of you that is currently loading. They’re going to be pretty great once the Wi-Fi catches up.</p> <p class="p1">If you are struggling to figure out which “old habits” to leave behind this year, get in touch with Frieda Levycky of <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/"><span class="s1">Braving Boundaries</span></a> who can provide advice and support to help you get started.</p> <p class="p2"><span class="s2"><i>(Sources used and to whom we owe thanks – </i><a href="https://www.soulfulstrides.co.nz/blog-lifecoaching/the-identity-shift-how-to-become-the-2026-version-of-you#:~:text=Identity%2520change%2520happens%2520through%2520gentle,offers%2520%25E2%2580%2594%2520linked%2520in%2520my%2520header." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Soulful strides</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://ningcollective.com/blogs/articles/signs-youve-outgrown-yourself-how-to-differentiate-between-procrastination-and-growth" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Ning Collective</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://breakthatspace.in/2026/01/07/signs-youve-outgrown/#:~:text=How%2520your%2520day%2520feels,have%2520a%2520good%2520night's%2520sleep." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Breakthatspace</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://jamesclear.com/identity-based-habits#:~:text=There%2520are%2520two%2520steps.,get%2520the%2520outcome%2520I%2520want?%25E2%2580%259D" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>James Clear</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://hbr.org/2026/01/leaders-bring-your-best-self-into-the-new-year" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Harvard Business Review</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/za/articles/202601/7-power-moves-for-2026#:~:text=Talk%2520about%2520yourself%252C%2520to%2520yourself,else's%2520personality%2520for%2520a%2520day." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Psychology Today</i></span></a><i>; </i><a href="https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC12109062/#:~:text=Behavioural%2520intention%252C%2520self%252Ddetermined%2520motivation,et%2520al.%252C%25202024)." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>National Library of Medicine</i></span></a><i>; Medium </i><a href="https://medium.com/@svwvqgrtb/identity-first-habits-second-why-change-starts-within-d932df4b31dc" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a><i> and </i><a href="https://medium.com/change-your-mind/5-signs-you-are-outgrowing-your-old-self-759580eeb7c6" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a></span><span class="s3">;</span><span class="s2"><i> </i><a href="https://medium.com/change-your-mind/5-signs-you-are-outgrowing-your-old-self-759580eeb7c6" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Bolde</i></span></a></span><span class="s3"> </span><span class="s2"><i>and </i><a href="https://selfdeterminationtheory.org/SDT/documents/2000_RyanDeci_SDT.pdf" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Self-Determination Theory</i></span></a><i>). <span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></i></span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_37"> <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/book-a-call/"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/01/Mailshot-CTA-images.png" alt="" title="Mailshot CTA images" class="wp-image-235573" /></span></a> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_divider et_pb_divider_3 et_pb_divider_position_bottom et_pb_space"><div class="et_pb_divider_internal"></div></div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_27 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_44 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_38"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_45 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_82 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p> <p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:alicia@thebelletrist.com" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">alicia@thebelletrist.com</a> </strong></div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/navigating-change-new-year-new-me/">The Identity Purgatory – Surviving the “New Year, New Me” Glitch of 2026</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/navigating-change-new-year-new-me/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>If Our Lives Were a Movie</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/if-our-lives-were-a-movie/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/if-our-lives-were-a-movie/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Tue, 16 Dec 2025 14:40:58 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Celebrations & Festivities]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Communication]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Effective communication]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Personal Growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Stress & Anxiety]]></category> <category><![CDATA[boundaries]]></category> <category><![CDATA[chronic illness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[family]]></category> <category><![CDATA[festive reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[honesty]]></category> <category><![CDATA[life lessons]]></category> <category><![CDATA[love actually]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category> <category><![CDATA[personal growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[relationships]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-worth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[year-end reflection]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235481</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/if-our-lives-were-a-movie/">If Our Lives Were a Movie</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_4 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_28"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_46 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_83 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_84 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Rated ‘U’ for Unexpected: A Love, Actually Remake Starring Me, a Bear, and a Maine Coon</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_85 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">As a certified, card-carrying love fool – the kind who still believes Hugh Grant can dance and that a handwritten sign is the peak of romantic communication – I decided to view my year through the soft-focus, ensemble-cast lens of <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H9Z3_ifFheQ" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Love, Actually</i></span></a>. It seemed fitting. I am a complete romantic, I always root for the underdog (usually me and my perpetually swollen joints), and frankly, my life often feels like a series of interconnected, slightly chaotic subplots that sometimes involve airport scenes that drag on too long.</p> <p class="p1">This year’s production was an emotional rollercoaster, complete with a heartwarming soundtrack, a pivotal Christmas pageant scene (metaphorically speaking), and enough anti-inflammatories and painkillers to sedate a small elephant.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_86 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><strong>The Prime Minister and the Tea Lady (That’s Me and My Boundaries)</strong></h3></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_39"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/12/Metal-door-View-more-by-pixbox77-from-Getty-Images.jpg" alt="Metal door View more by pixbox77 from Getty Images" title="Metal door View more by pixbox77 from Getty Images" class="wp-image-235497" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_87 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">My main plotline, much like the Prime Minister’s awkward-but-charming romance with the tea lady, Natalie, was learning to put myself first and establish some much-needed boundaries. I spent years being the human equivalent of a revolving door for other people’s dramas, other people’s outrageous lies, always apologetic, always in pain, but perpetually available for a crisis I didn’t create.</p> <p class="p1">This year, the door was firmly shut and possibly reinforced with hardened steel, much to the chagrin of my autoimmune system, which decided to throw a flare-up party every time I used the word “no.” My anxiety disorder provided a running commentary from the sidelines: <i>“Are you sure you should have said that? They hate you now. You’re going to die alone.”</i> (My anxiety is a dramatic diva. Much like me).</p> <p class="p1">The result? A rather surprising revelation about my supporting cast. The people who complained about the new boundaries turned out to be the ones using the revolving door as a shortcut. The friends who stayed? They brought casseroles, respected the “Do Not Disturb” sign, and didn’t mind when I cancelled plans because my psoriatic arthritis decided my ankle looked like a balloon. It turns out that true friendship, much like good lighting in a British rom com, doesn’t need constant negotiation. It just works.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_88 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><strong>Sarah and Karl (The Family Plot Twist)</strong></h3></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_40"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/12/Woman-Recording-Video-of-Cat-View-more-by-Yasar-Baskurt-from-Pexels.jpg" alt="Woman Recording Video of Cat View more by Yaşar Başkurt from Pexels" title="Woman Recording Video of Cat View more by Yaşar Başkurt from Pexels" class="wp-image-235496" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_89 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">My Sarah/Karl storyline was perhaps the most poignant and least-dramatic heartbreak of the year. Sarah is the lovely woman who puts her life on hold for her institutionalised brother, sacrificing her chance with Karl, the gorgeous office crush. It’s a beautifully painful subplot about duty and impossible timing.</p> <p class="p1">My twist, however, was about redefining “family.” I had to accept a hard truth – some family can’t be chosen, and sometimes, they choose not to choose you back. The phone call that interrupts the perfect romantic moment with Karl is a painful reality check.</p> <p class="p1">But here’s the unexpected cinematic magic: other family members, whom I’d never been particularly close to in my sordid past, stepped into the void and became everything to me. It was a beautiful, quiet realisation that connection is measured not in shared DNA, but in shared presence. My “Karl” moment was a pivot toward people who answered the phone when I called, rather than letting it ring out.</p> <p class="p1">They also send rather cute cat videos via Instagram and WhatsApp. I’m lucky like that.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_90 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><strong>Jamie and Aurélia (Telling My Clients the Truth)</strong></h3></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_41"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/12/Discovering-the-truth-View-more-by-esolla-from-Getty-Images-Signature.jpg" alt="Discovering the truth View more by esolla from Getty Images Signature" title="Discovering the truth View more by esolla from Getty Images Signature" class="wp-image-235495" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_91 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">Jamie (Colin Firth) learns Portuguese for Aurélia, the beautiful housekeeper he can barely communicate with. It’s a grand, slightly mad gesture of connection.</p> <p class="p1">In my professional life, I had my own “learn Portuguese” moment. Instead of jargon and corporate-speak, my “Portuguese” was vulnerability. Telling clients my truth – setting realistic expectations, admitting when my chronic illness meant I needed more time, and being transparent about my capacity. It felt incredibly risky, especially with my depression whispering that I was surely about to be fired.</p> <p class="p1">The result? Stronger, deeper, and more respectful relationships. They didn’t fire me. Instead, they appreciated the honesty. We’re no longer just colleagues, we’re a united front against deadlines. Who knew honesty was the ultimate business development tool?</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_92 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><strong>The Sidekick: Georgia Peach</strong></h3></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_42"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/12/Majestic-Maine-Coon-Cat-on-Cozy-Sofa-View-more-by-Ludovic-Delot-from-Pexels.jpg" alt="Majestic Maine Coon Cat on Cozy Sofa View more by Ludovic Delot from Pexels" title="Majestic Maine Coon Cat on Cozy Sofa View more by Ludovic Delot from Pexels" class="wp-image-235494" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_93 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">Every leading lady needs a fabulous sidekick. Mine wasn’t the delightfully sassy <i>Love, Actually</i> assistant, Mia. I have a full “Hairy Board of Directors.” I am a mother of cats, four perfect creatures who demand tribute and offer unconditional moral support.</p> <p class="p1">Special mention is to my Georgia Peach, my soul cat, and a majestic Maine Coon kitty. She is the quiet observer of my grand romantic gestures and dramatic boundary-setting. She was the hairy, purring anchor during every emotional scene, reminding me that the world looks better from the top of the refrigerator, and that all problems can be temporarily solved by demanding treats. Great minds think alike in that way.</p> <p class="p1">The other three – well, they mostly just reminded me that if I collapse in pain, they might eat my face, but they’d <i>probably</i> feel bad about it later. They taught me that sometimes the best form of support is simply curling up next to someone and not judging their choice of rom-com or the staggering amount of pain relief on my bedside table.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_94 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h3><strong>My Happily Ever After: Big Bear and the Matchmaking Kitty</strong></h3></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_43"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/12/Loving-Supportive-Husband-Holding-Hand-of-Sad-Wife-View-more-by-dimaberlinphotos-2.jpg" alt="Loving Supportive Husband Holding Hand of Sad Wife View more by dimaberlinphotos (2)" title="Loving Supportive Husband Holding Hand of Sad Wife View more by dimaberlinphotos (2)" class="wp-image-235492" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_95 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">My life is a movie where I hit the jackpot in love, although it wasn’t always this way. In a previous subplot, my first cat, Hugo Boss, a big ginger kitty with excellent taste in suitors, actually helped me choose my husband. He just knew.</p> <p class="p1">And my husband, whom I lovingly call Big Bear, showed up this year – as he always does (truly) – in so many ways. He’s the quiet hero who doesn’t need a spotlight, but who ensures the show goes on. He’s the safe harbour when the autoimmune storm rages, the one who patiently listens to my anxiety’s dramatic monologues. Our love story is the stable, grounding storyline that balances out my personal chaos.</p> <p class="p1">And when in doubt he supplies ice-cream. And that works too.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_96 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>What I Learned in the Final Reel</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_97 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">As the credits prepared to roll on my year, I looked back at the messy, beautiful montage of my life. The scenes involving severe joint pain and depressive episodes didn’t make the final cut, but their lessons certainly remained.</p> <p class="p1">I learned to be kinder to myself and those in my immediate circle. It’s a small cast, but a stellar one. I learned patience – everyone truly does get what they deserve, though sometimes the universe’s delivery schedule is slower than international airmail at Christmas.</p> <p class="p1">And the biggest takeaway? The truth will out. It always does. You can’t hide behind flimsy excuses or avoidance forever. Honesty, with others and especially yourself, sets you free. Usually in slow motion, and possibly to a Sugababes song.</p> <p class="p1">As we all prepare to dash through our respective airport terminals to meet our future selves, I gently invite you to reflect on your own blockbuster year with compassion, humour (most definitely), and a sense of closure. What was your main plot twist? Who was your unlikely sidekick? What truth finally found its way out?</p> <p class="p1">Grab a box of tissues, cue the festive music, and let’s end this year in a way that makes us feel good about what’s to come in 2026. This is our cinematic homecoming. Remember: Love (of self, boundaries, very large cats, a supportive Big Bear, and a decent pain management plan), actually, <i>is</i> all around.</p> <p class="p1">Happy reflecting and Merry Christmas!</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_divider et_pb_divider_4 et_pb_divider_position_bottom et_pb_space"><div class="et_pb_divider_internal"></div></div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_29 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_47 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_44"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_48 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_98 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p> <p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:alicia@thebelletrist.com" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">alicia@thebelletrist.com</a> </strong></div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/if-our-lives-were-a-movie/">If Our Lives Were a Movie</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/if-our-lives-were-a-movie/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>How self-worth changes the way you make decisions</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/how-self-worth-changes-the-way-you-make-decisions/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/how-self-worth-changes-the-way-you-make-decisions/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Tue, 16 Dec 2025 14:31:36 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Corporate Wellness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Finding direction and purpose]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Lawyer Life]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Team communication]]></category> <category><![CDATA[boundaries]]></category> <category><![CDATA[career reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[coaching insights]]></category> <category><![CDATA[confidence]]></category> <category><![CDATA[decision making]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Leadership Development]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Navigating Change]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Personal development]]></category> <category><![CDATA[personal growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-respect]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-worth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[work-life balance]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235503</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/how-self-worth-changes-the-way-you-make-decisions/">How self-worth changes the way you make decisions</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_5 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_30"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_49 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_99 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY FRIEDA LEVYCKY, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/" style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;">BRAVING BOUNDARIES</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5> <p><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></p> <p class="p1">Self-worth isn’t something we tend to think about day to day, yet it quietly sits behind almost every decision we make. It influences what we ask for, what we put up with and when we finally decide something needs to change. When you start to see your value more clearly, the choices you make begin to look very different.</p> <p class="p1">I learnt this during a conversation about a salary increase; an exchange that revealed far more about how I saw myself than I expected. It wasn’t really about the money. It was about the internal shift that comes from finally backing yourself. Once that shift begins, it has a way of reshaping your next steps, both at work and in the rest of your life.</p> <p class="p1">The experience didn’t start dramatically, it built slowly. That familiar mix of tiredness, frustration and feeling slightly invisible despite working incredibly hard. I’ve always hated confrontation. I would tell myself that my salary wasn’t that bad, that others had it worse, that raising it might make me look ungrateful or difficult. I kept my head down and carried on, even though something inside felt off.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_100 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The appraisal that changed everything</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_45"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/12/A-Woman-Working-hard-in-the-Office-View-more-by-Tima-Miroshnichenko-from-Pexels.jpg" alt="A Woman Working hard in the Office View more by Tima Miroshnichenko from Pexels" title="A Woman Working hard in the Office View more by Tima Miroshnichenko from Pexels" class="wp-image-235511" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_101 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">The pressure reached a tipping point during my annual appraisal. I had already done the groundwork. I had researched market benchmarks, spoken to trusted colleagues and gathered the data I needed to make a reasonable, well-informed case. My intention was simple: a straightforward discussion about performance and fair compensation.</p> <p class="p1">The response surprised me. I was told that if I received more money, others would have to lose out. A “limited pot” for the team suddenly became my responsibility to navigate. The implication was subtle yet powerful: <em>asking for fairness meant harming the people around me</em>.</p> <p class="p1">I walked out feeling completely deflated. My request had turned into a moral dilemma. The doubt crept in quickly, which is exactly what comments like that tend to provoke. I began questioning whether I should have raised it at all, despite knowing my figures were accurate and reasonable.</p> <p class="p1">A few hours later, a different feeling settled in. I realised I wasn’t willing to sit with that discomfort or accept the guilt that had been handed to me. I emailed HR and expressed my disappointment. That email marked the first real step in backing myself. It was a quiet refusal to accept the narrative I had been given.</p> <p class="p1">What followed was a series of conversations: first with HR, then with HR and my boss together. None of it was especially comfortable, but most things worth doing rarely are. It was somewhere in the middle of it all, that the penny dropped. The problem wasn’t my request. The problem was the system that made me feel guilty for making it.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_102 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>The outcome and what truly changed</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_46"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/12/Person-Celebrating-in-Nature-with-Outstretched-Arms-View-more-by-Aflo-Images-from-アフロ（Aflo）.jpg" alt="Person Celebrating in Nature with Outstretched Arms View more by Aflo Images from アフロ（Aflo）" title="Person Celebrating in Nature with Outstretched Arms View more by Aflo Images from アフロ（Aflo）" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_103 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">I eventually received an increase (staggered over two years). A very corporate outcome. The most meaningful change had nothing to do with money though. It happened internally. For the first time, I stopped waiting for someone else to define my worth. I stopped outsourcing that responsibility. I stood up for myself.</p> <p class="p1">It was the first time I showed up as the <i>real</i> me. Not the overly accommodating version. Not the “I’ll just cope” version. The version that quietly knew she deserved better and finally acted on it.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_104 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>When self-worth grows, your life starts to reorganise itself</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_105 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">There’s something else worth saying here because it’s important. Times like these often leave us with a choice: do I stay or do I go? Do I keep trying to make the current situation work or has this experience shown me that I’ve outgrown the box I’m in?</p> <p class="p1">We often imagine that once we take a stand and “win” (whether that’s a pay increase, a promotion or some acknowledgment), things will feel better. Yet, sometimes, all it does is confirm that the box you’ve been squeezing yourself into no longer fits. That’s exactly what happened to me.</p> <p class="p1">Was I pleased with the increase? Yes, on the surface. Was it market value? No, but by then it wasn’t even about the numbers. It was about something far more internal. It was the realisation that I was <i>allowed</i> to ask for more: more money, more balance, more respect, more alignment. That shift doesn’t stay neatly contained in one corner of your life. It ripples.</p> <blockquote> <p class="p2"><b><i>Once you recognise you’re allowed to want more, it becomes very hard to un-see it.</i></b></p> </blockquote> <p class="p1">That point of showing up in my career opened a much wider door. Not long after, I left that job to take a gap year. I also ended friendships and romantic relationships that weren’t good for me. It wasn’t dramatic or chaotic. It was simply a series of decisions rooted in a new, steadier sense of self-worth.</p> <p class="p1">When you finally show up for yourself in one area of your life, you begin to show up everywhere.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_106 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Why these shifts matter</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_47"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/12/Frieda-Levycky-with-a-coffee-cup.jpg" alt="Frieda Levycky with a coffee cup" title="Frieda Levycky with a coffee cup" class="wp-image-235509" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_107 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">Personal change does not usually arrive through grand gestures. Most of it is shaped by small, uncomfortable choices that you replay in your mind long after the conversation ends. Those choices quietly mark a before and after.</p> <p class="p1">Self-worth influences those decisions more than we realise. It shapes what we accept, what we ask for and when we finally choose a different path.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_108 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>What coaching helped me see</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_109 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">The experience did not turn me into someone who enjoys confrontation or enters every challenging discussion with flawless confidence. What it did do was open a door to deeper self-awareness.</p> <p class="p1">Coaching helped me walk through it. It helped me separate my worth from external approval, understand the stories that held me back and recognise that showing up is a skill rather than a personality trait. Something we get better at each time we practise it.</p> <p class="p1">I see the same pattern with so many clients: most people know what they want. They’re just not convinced they’re allowed to want it.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_110 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>If you’re standing at a crossroads</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_111 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">Anyone who finds themselves in that uncomfortable space where something needs to change – even if the shape of the change isn’t fully clear – is not alone.</p> <p class="p1">You don’t need to be fearless. You don’t need to have a full plan. You just need to be willing to take the first step. Confidence grows from action, not the other way round.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_48"> <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/book-a-call/"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/12/Mailshot-CTA-images.jpg" alt="" title="Mailshot CTA images" class="wp-image-235507" /></span></a> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/how-self-worth-changes-the-way-you-make-decisions/">How self-worth changes the way you make decisions</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/how-self-worth-changes-the-way-you-make-decisions/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts! Part I – Especially for Individuals</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-i-especially-for-individuals/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-i-especially-for-individuals/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Thu, 30 Oct 2025 11:10:58 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Stress & Anxiety]]></category> <category><![CDATA[work-life balance]]></category> <category><![CDATA[boundaries]]></category> <category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Christmas pressure]]></category> <category><![CDATA[end-of-year tips]]></category> <category><![CDATA[holiday burnout]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Personal development]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[stress management]]></category> <category><![CDATA[wellbeing]]></category> <category><![CDATA[year-end stress]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235409</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-i-especially-for-individuals/">The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts! Part I – Especially for Individuals</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_6 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_31"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_50 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_112 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5> <p> </p> <p class="p1"><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-ii-especially-for-teams">Click here for Part II: The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts – Especially for teams …</a></span></p> <p> </p> <p class="p1">It can’t be that time of the year already, can it?</p> <p class="p1">Wow, this year has flown by. It literally felt like Januuuuaaaaarrryyyyyyyy, Febrrrrrrruuuuuuuaaaaaaaarrrryyyyyyy and Maaaaaaaaarch took up most of the year, then AprMayJuneJulyAugustSept and October were sort of compacted into a few short weeks. Or so it seemed. And now we are left with the last two months of the year.</p> <p class="p1">I’m not sure about you, but usually when the end of year starts approaching, I become a real Grinch. Not because I dislike Christmas. Actually, I LOVE this time of the year. The lights, the Christmas décor, the mulled wine and hot cocoa. The joy that’s in the air. No matter your age, the end of the year brings with it a kind of magic. However, when you’re the one responsible for closing up shop, purchasing gifts, cooking, visiting family and friends and generally all of the organising, it can feel a little unnerving and suddenly two months doesn’t feel like enough time.</p> <p class="p1">It’s like we become burdened with endless responsibilities with trying to fit everything in. With trying to make sure everyone is happy and everything is done “just right.” The problem with that is that it often comes at the cost of our own enjoyment and happiness. You end up turning into the Grinch on a mission to “tick all the boxes.”</p> <p class="p1">And, frankly, who does that serve? Not a single soul.</p> <p class="p1">We get so caught up in the madness of the end of the year and before we know it, we are stressed to the max, overwhelmed and feeling frustrated at just how little time we have left to get everything done. Most importantly we can completely lose the joy, fun and excitement of this time of the year. And that just doesn’t feel right.</p> <p class="p1">There has got to be a different way?!</p> <p class="p1">A way that means that you can enjoy this time, while still getting all the important things done. A way that doesn’t put your mental and emotional wellbeing at stake because the point here is to thrive through the end of year craziness! Not suffer through it.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_113 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Preparing for year-end pressures</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_49"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Sprinter-Getting-Ready-to-Start-by-Dean-Drobot.jpg" alt="Sprinter Getting Ready to Start by Dean Drobot" title="Sprinter Getting Ready to Start by Dean Drobot" class="wp-image-235443" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_114 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1"><strong>How individuals can prepare for the end of year silliness</strong></p> <p class="p1">I was reading <a href="https://amazingbusiness.com/6-ways-to-thrive-through-the-end-of-year-craziness/#:~:text=It%2520is%2520that%2520time%2520of,I%2520could%2520enjoy%2520this%2520time." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1">an article</span></a> by Kim Baird regarding her prep for the end of the year and really liked her 6 guidelines. They set out as follows –</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_32 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_51 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_50"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-1486" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_52 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_115 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong>Get clear on your priorities</strong> – with more than enough to do at this time of the year, it’s important that you know what is most important to you, so that you can focus on those things and not allow them to slip through the cracks. Take some time, sit down and write down the most important things at this time of the year. You can do this by asking yourself some pertinent questions like: <i>What is most important for you to get done before the end of the year? What goals do you want to achieve? </i>(remember to be realistic here and not overburden yourself) and <i>how do you want to feel come the end of the year?</i> Once you have answered these questions, it’s time to set up a schedule so that you can fit these priorities into your life. That includes family time … because otherwise we find that there’s no time left for the things that are most important to us.</div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_33 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_53 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_51"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-1487" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_54 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_116 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong>Get good at saying “No” </strong><b>– </b>if you are a “yes man” this is your time to change your ways. You don’t need to be superhuman. No one has time for that. Instead learn to embrace the “no.” You cannot do everything and cannot be everywhere. It is perfectly acceptable to say “no thank you” as well. Because you are worth it. Your goals, your business and your wellbeing are worth it. They don’t need to always be getting pushed to the bottom of the priorities list! That’s why getting clear on your priorities is so important. Once you know what those are, saying no to everything else becomes a lot easier.</div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_34 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_55 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_52"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_56 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_117 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong>Schedule in downtime for self-care</strong><b> – </b>being busy is good, getting things done is even better, but having a schedule that leaves little room for you and your own wellbeing practices will not help you thrive as you get through the silly season. You are as important as year end and planning for the New Year. If you are only getting caught up in the busyness of the season you risk burnout or getting sick because you are not taking care of yourself. Make yourself a priority. Schedule in your own downtime and self-care.</div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_35"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_57 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_53"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Top-view-of-a-lightbox-with-motivational-words-for-self-care-mental-health-emotional-well-being-by-Wirestock-from-Getty-Images.jpg" alt="Top view of a lightbox with motivational words for self-care, mental health, emotional well-being by Wirestock from Getty Images" title="Top view of a lightbox with motivational words for self-care, mental health, emotional well-being by Wirestock from Getty Images" class="wp-image-235446" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_36 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_58 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_54"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/4.png" alt="" title="4" class="wp-image-1489" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_59 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_118 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong>Delete the unnecessary</strong> – striving for excellence and reaching epic goals is impressive but, at this time of the year, it isn’t necessary. Not really. Being ambitious is one thing. Being realistic is far better. Especially now. Deleting the unnecessary is in line with saying no, it’s just going a little deeper. Delete things from your list that are just not that important and don’t weigh yourself down with massive responsibility to get everything done. Recognise what is truly important to you and what really needs to be done and delete the rest of your list.</div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_37 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_60 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_55"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/5.png" alt="" title="5" class="wp-image-1490" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_61 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_119 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><strong>Delegate what you can</strong> – you aren’t an island and there’s no “I” in team. Get the picture? You don’t need to do everything yourself and you don’t need to control everything. You are still worthy, deserving and valuable even when you get other people to help with the things that need to be done. It’s ok to ask for help and it’s ok to delegate tasks to others. It may even be beneficial in the long run. So, ask for help if you need it.</div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_38 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_62 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_56"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/6.jpg" alt="" title="6" class="wp-image-1491" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_63 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_120 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><i></i><strong>Take focused action</strong> – sitting at your computer or laptop trying to work and taking focused action are two vastly different things. Make sure that when you’re working, you remove all the distractions around you that will take your focus away and truly focus on the matter at hand. It’s also a good idea to plan ahead for your day (the day before). Understand that you have 3 or so important tasks that need to get done the next day and plan how you’re going to go about doing them. When you are taking focused action, you are more productive, and you can get huge amounts done in a small amount of time. And this frees up more time and space for downtime, fun and looking after you. Ultimately helping you to thrive through the end of year craziness!</div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_39"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_64 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_121 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">It’s clear from the above that closing off the end of the year and planning for the New Year while also shopping for Christmas presents and everything else the end of year brings can be done in a way that makes you thrive! In a way that helps you enjoy this time of year. In a way that allows you to feel less guilty and less crazy with all the end of the year holds. It just takes some planning, some prioritising and it definitely takes some saying no.</p> <p class="p1">And lastly if you need support as you go through the end of year craziness, get in touch with Frieda Levycky at <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/"><span class="s1">Braving Boundaries</span></a>. Don’t waste a moment more! Again, asking for help is not only brave but the best thing you can do for you. No matter what time of the year you do it in.</p> <p class="p2"><i>(Sources used and to whom we owe thanks – </i><a href="https://www.gouldtraining.co.uk/topics/assertiveness/setting-boundaries/boundaries-at-work" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Gould Training</i></span></a><i>; LinkedIn </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/navigating-year-end-pressures-finding-balance-amid-di-dia-pcc-szzce/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a><i> and </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/manage-year-end-stress-go-q1-strong-approach-miller-caton-jr-mrmhf/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a><i> and </i><a href="https://amazingbusiness.com/6-ways-to-thrive-through-the-end-of-year-craziness/#:~:text=It%2520is%2520that%2520time%2520of,I%2520could%2520enjoy%2520this%2520time." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Amazing Business</i></span></a><i>).<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></i></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_57"> <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Revised-Corporate-Services-Brochure-2025.pdf" target="_blank"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/End-of-blog-post-CTA-image.jpg" alt="End of blog post CTA image (5)" title="End of blog post CTA image" class="wp-image-235400" /></span></a> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_divider et_pb_divider_5 et_pb_divider_position_bottom et_pb_space"><div class="et_pb_divider_internal"></div></div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_40 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_65 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_58"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_66 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_122 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p> <p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:alicia@thebelletrist.com" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">alicia@thebelletrist.com</a> </strong></div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-i-especially-for-individuals/">The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts! Part I – Especially for Individuals</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-i-especially-for-individuals/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts! Part II – Especially for Teams</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-ii-especially-for-teams/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-ii-especially-for-teams/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Thu, 30 Oct 2025 11:05:06 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Communication]]></category> <category><![CDATA[braving boundaries]]></category> <category><![CDATA[burnout prevention]]></category> <category><![CDATA[communication]]></category> <category><![CDATA[corporate wellness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[employee engagement]]></category> <category><![CDATA[end-of-year stress]]></category> <category><![CDATA[leadership]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mental health at work]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mindful working]]></category> <category><![CDATA[team performance]]></category> <category><![CDATA[team wellbeing]]></category> <category><![CDATA[workplace culture]]></category> <category><![CDATA[year-end planning]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235421</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-ii-especially-for-teams/">The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts! Part II – Especially for Teams</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_7 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_41"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_67 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_123 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5> <p> </p> <p class="p1"><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-i-especially-for-individuals">Click here for Part I: The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts – Especially for individuals …</a></span></p> <p> </p> <p class="p1">Just as it is in our personal lives, the end-of-year rush takes hold at work too. As deadlines tighten, budgets close and projects demand wrapping up, teams everywhere find themselves hurtling toward December with little time to rest. The pace quickens, expectations rise and even the most cohesive teams can begin to feel the strain.</p> <p class="p1">In theory, this should be the season for celebration: a chance to recognise collective achievements and enjoy the camaraderie built over the year. Yet, more often than not, it becomes a blur of back-to-back meetings, last-minute deliverables and frantic attempts to “get everything done before the holidays”. The joy of teamwork gives way to the tyranny of ticking boxes.</p> <p class="p1">Perfection takes priority over presence and connection is lost in the noise of productivity. The focus shifts from collaboration to completion, leaving even the strongest teams drained and disconnected.</p> <p class="p1">This time of year doesn’t have to be about survival. With a more mindful and intentional approach, teams can finish the year with focus, appreciation and energy, not exhaustion. It’s about swapping stress for strategy and rediscovering the meaning behind working <i>together</i>.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_124 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Preparing for year-end pressures</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_59"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Athletes-Ready-at-the-Starting-Blocks-by-Aflo-Images-from-アフロ（Aflo）.jpg" alt="Athletes Ready at the Starting Blocks by Aflo Images from アフロ（Aflo）" title="Athletes Ready at the Starting Blocks by Aflo Images from アフロ（Aflo）" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_125 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1"><strong>How teams can prepare for the end of the year silliness</strong></p> <p class="p1">Year-end pressures can be overwhelming for both leaders and teams. Here are some ways to mitigate the stress and maintain well-being –</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_42 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_68 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_60"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-1486" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_69 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_126 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Setting clear expectations and workload management</strong></p> <p> </p> <ul class="ul1"> <li class="li1"><b>Communicate targets realistically –</b> define achievable end-of-year goals (yes be realistic) and deadlines without creating an overwhelming workload (because that would defeat the purpose, wouldn’t it?).</li> <li class="li1"><b>Prioritise tasks –</b> focus on tasks with the highest impact and delegate or postpone others if at all possible. Learn to say no, prioritise and ask for help.</li> <li class="li1"><b>Break down large projects –</b> divide major tasks into smaller, manageable milestones to maintain momentum and avoid burnout. After all, this is the end of the year, set your tasks at an achievable level. Tackle the most important things first. Leave the rest, if you can, until the New Year.</li> <li class="li1"><b>Allocate tasks fairly –</b> distribute responsibilities based on individual capacity and capabilities to ensure no one is overloaded, overwhelmed and stressed out. It’s their end of the year too. Remember that.</li> <li class="li1"><b>Plan in advance –</b> look at the calendar and determine resource needs, potential flexibility options and celebration plans before the busy season begins.</li> </ul></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_43 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_70 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_61"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-1487" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_71 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_127 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Protecting boundaries</strong><b></b></p> <p> </p> <ul class="ul1"> <li class="li1"><b>Encourage employees to set boundaries –</b> leaders should encourage and commend employees for establishing their own boundaries and model this behaviour themselves. Lead by example as they say.</li> <li class="li1"><b>Communicate boundaries clearly – </b>employees should define and communicate their work hours and availability to colleagues and clients, clearly but politely. Sometimes a firm word is required.</li> <li class="li1"><b>Practice saying no –</b> learn to politely decline tasks that exceed capacity and bandwidth. You matter too.</li> <li class="li1"><b>Disconnect after hours –</b> encourage employees to unplug from work-related communications during off-hours. Unless it’s life threatening, after-hours should be sacrosanct.</li> <li class="li1"><b>Seek support –</b> employees should feel comfortable discussing their workload and seeking help from managers or colleagues if they are overwhelmed. Delegation is important and sometimes very necessary. Leaders and employees must be open to this.</li> </ul></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_44"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_72 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_62"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Word-Unplug-White-Internet-Usb-Adapter-on-Moss-Green-Grass-Background.-Top-View.-Copy-Space.-Banner.-Biophilia-Concept.-Nature-Backdrop-by-Yuliia-Chyzhevska.jpg" alt="Word Unplug, White Internet Usb Adapter on Moss, Green Grass Background. Top View. Copy Space. Banner. Biophilia Concept. Nature Backdrop by Yuliia Chyzhevska" title="Word Unplug, White Internet Usb Adapter on Moss, Green Grass Background. Top View. Copy Space. Banner. Biophilia Concept. Nature Backdrop by Yuliia Chyzhevska" class="wp-image-235447" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_45 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_73 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_63"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_74 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_128 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Creating space for reflection and closure</strong><b></b></p> <p> </p> <ul class="ul1"> <li class="li1"><b>Encourage breaks and downtime –</b> regular breaks throughout the workday and during the holiday season are essential for recharging and maintaining focus. It’s no longer a bum on seats scenario and burning the midnight oil is so old school. We have moved beyond that now and recognise that burnout is real. Downtime is, in fact, necessary.</li> <li class="li1"><b>Promote self-care –</b> encourage practices such as adequate sleep, healthy eating, exercise and mindfulness techniques.</li> <li class="li1"><b>Reflect on the year’s successes and challenges –</b> before the break, leaders and teams can reflect on achievements, lessons learned and areas for improvement, helping to build momentum for the new year.</li> <li class="li1"><b>Celebrate wins –</b> acknowledge and celebrate achievements, both big and small, to boost morale and engagement.</li> <li class="li1"><b>Recharge intentionally –</b> take time to rest and reset to ensure a refreshed start to the New Year.</li> </ul></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_46"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_75 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_129 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">The end of the year doesn’t have to feel like a mad dash to the finish. With a bit of planning, clearer priorities and a few well-placed “no’s”, it can be a time to thrive rather than merely survive.</p> <p class="p1">In the workplace, that means creating a culture that supports people; one that values wellbeing as much as performance. Open, honest communication is vital. Speak up when you’re stretched, ask for help, delegate where you can and support one another through the crunch.</p> <p class="p1">If you or your team could use some guidance navigating this busy season, reach out to Frieda Levycky at <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/"><span class="s1">Braving Boundaries</span></a>. Sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is ask for help, whatever time of year it may be.</p> <p class="p1"><i>(Sources used and to whom we owe thanks – </i><a href="https://www.gouldtraining.co.uk/topics/assertiveness/setting-boundaries/boundaries-at-work" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Gould Training</i></span></a><i>; LinkedIn </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/navigating-year-end-pressures-finding-balance-amid-di-dia-pcc-szzce/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a><i> and </i><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/manage-year-end-stress-go-q1-strong-approach-miller-caton-jr-mrmhf/" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>here</i></span></a><i> and </i><a href="https://amazingbusiness.com/6-ways-to-thrive-through-the-end-of-year-craziness/#:~:text=It%2520is%2520that%2520time%2520of,I%2520could%2520enjoy%2520this%2520time." target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Amazing Business</i></span></a><i>).<span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span></i></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_64"> <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Revised-Corporate-Services-Brochure-2025.pdf" target="_blank"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/End-of-blog-post-CTA-image.jpg" alt="End of blog post CTA image (5)" title="End of blog post CTA image" class="wp-image-235400" /></span></a> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_divider et_pb_divider_6 et_pb_divider_position_bottom et_pb_space"><div class="et_pb_divider_internal"></div></div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_47 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_76 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_65"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_77 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_130 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p> <p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:alicia@thebelletrist.com" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">alicia@thebelletrist.com</a> </strong></div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-ii-especially-for-teams/">The End-of-Year Crunch is Always Nuts! Part II – Especially for Teams</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/the-end-of-year-crunch-is-always-nuts-part-ii-especially-for-teams/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>Beyond Wellness Hours: Why Teams Need Real Training Time</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/beyond-wellness-hours-why-teams-need-real-training-time/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/beyond-wellness-hours-why-teams-need-real-training-time/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Wed, 29 Oct 2025 13:59:23 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Corporate Wellness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Effective communication]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Health]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mental health]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Team building]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Team communication]]></category> <category><![CDATA[work-life balance]]></category> <category><![CDATA[coaching]]></category> <category><![CDATA[continuous learning]]></category> <category><![CDATA[corporate training]]></category> <category><![CDATA[corporate wellness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[employee development]]></category> <category><![CDATA[employee happiness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[leadership training]]></category> <category><![CDATA[learning culture]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mental health at work]]></category> <category><![CDATA[team growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[wellbeing at work]]></category> <category><![CDATA[workplace engagement]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235389</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/beyond-wellness-hours-why-teams-need-real-training-time/">Beyond Wellness Hours: Why Teams Need Real Training Time</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_8 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_48"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_78 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_131 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY ALICIA KOCH, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;" href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">THE LEGAL BELLETRIST</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5> <p><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></p> <p class="p1">Ah wellness.</p> <p class="p1">We often take it for granted, don’t we? Like it’s this “thing” that needs to be constantly maintained. Another “task” or item on your to-do list that you need to take care of.</p> <p class="p1">So, when the company you work for provides activities, resources and screenings to support your and your colleague’s health, you are relieved that it’s one less thing you have to worry about. </p> <p class="p1">Sure, the goal of these activities is to help employees recharge, decompress from stress and return to work feeling more productive and engaged, but you often wonder whether one wellness day every couple of months is really going to cut it.</p> <p class="p1">Let’s be honest here, is one day of yoga or one day of mindfulness sessions really going to bridge the gap between feeling fulfilled and at peace with your work environment and working to your full potential? Or do you need something a little more concrete? A little more permanent? A little more constant?</p> <p class="p1">Let’s take a look, shall we?</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_132 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>Learning Is a Sure-Fire Path to Happiness: And Science Proves It</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_66"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Learning-by-shironosov-from-Getty-Images-Pro.jpg" alt="Learning by shironosov from Getty Images Pro" title="Learning by shironosov from Getty Images Pro" class="wp-image-235404" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_133 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">The title from an article that appeared in <a href="https://www.forbes.com/sites/tracybrower/2021/10/17/learning-is-a-sure-path-to-happiness-science-proves-it/?sh=8d93468768e3" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1">Forbes</span></a> talks about how learning empowers you – which is 100% true.</p> <p class="p1">While happiness arises when we are generous, grateful and connected with our people, research suggests that another path towards happiness is learning, growing and challenging ourselves in new ways – all of which results in us thriving.</p> <p class="p1">This can be translated to both our work lives and our personal lives. Thriving tends to occur when we experience success, but also when we are continually developing our skills and capabilities.</p> <p class="p1">Why is learning so important to happiness and thriving? What is it about learning that makes it a key ingredient of joy and achievement? There are multiple studies which demonstrate the relationship between learning and thriving and how these can increase happiness. Here are some of the outcomes –</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_49 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_79 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_67"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/1.png" alt="" title="1" class="wp-image-1486" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_80 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_134 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Self-Determination </strong>– we all crave choice and want to feel like we have some control over our lives and futures. Learning is frequently oriented toward self-determination. Some roles or companies may require certain learning, but many times learning is the result of pursuing your own interests and goals. No matter what the learning involved entails, it has the potential to open doors or provide options for growth that are uniquely interesting to you.</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_50 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_81 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_68"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/2.png" alt="" title="2" class="wp-image-1487" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_82 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_135 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Self-Confidence </strong>– learning can also be a source of self-confidence or likability. When you know more, you can contribute your perspectives and expertise and ask questions about others’ points of view that build on a solid foundation of your own knowledge. Your expanding capabilities can provide you with skills which help you contribute confidently to your current and future success.</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_51 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_83 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_69"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/3.jpg" alt="" title="3" class="wp-image-1488" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_84 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_136 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Resilience and Motivation</strong><i> – </i>learning also helps to build resilience. How you may ask? Well, learning requires you to admit that you don’t know everything. It also requires you to try something new and fill in gaps of information. So, both resilience and motivation. Fascinating research at the <a href="https://linkinghub.elsevier.com/retrieve/pii/S0896627314008046" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1">University of California Davis</span></a> also finds that curiosity helps your brain remain more open to additional learning and this openness helps you remember new information and cement memories. </p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_52"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_85 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_70"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Resilient-Flower-in-Arid-Landscape.-by-Gemini-studio.jpg" alt="Resilient Flower in Arid Landscape. by Gemini studio" title="Resilient Flower in Arid Landscape. by Gemini studio" class="wp-image-235403" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_53 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_86 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_71"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/4.png" alt="" title="4" class="wp-image-1489" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_87 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_137 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Broadened Perspective</strong><i> – </i>when you learn new things, you also expand your horizons. Greater perspective is linked to experiences of happiness and joy. No matter what you’re studying, you gain a new view and extend your knowledge of the world. This broader view of others, of the world, of circumstances and of possibilities. Brings about greater happiness.</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_54 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_88 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_72"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/5.png" alt="" title="5" class="wp-image-1490" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_89 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_138 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><strong>Health and Happiness</strong><i> – </i>a study between Oxford University and the <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/17533015.2016.1193550" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1">Workers Educational Association</span></a> of England and Scotland finds when people participate in classes outside of work, they improve their mental and physical health and report greater satisfaction with their lives. According to a study by <a href="https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10902-009-9166-1" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1">San Francisco State University</span></a>, those who engage in formal education experience greater happiness and life satisfaction overall.</p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_55"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_90 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_139 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">So, learning – in whatever form it takes – on a regular basis has been proven to have a positive impact on overall wellbeing, happiness and confidence. It also helps you further your career.</p> <p class="p1">One would say that those are a lot of positives, as far as ongoing learning is concerned.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_140 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>So, are ad hoc wellness days enough? </strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_141 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">We have already established two things –</p> <ol class="ol1"> <li class="li1">Wellness days offered by companies are intended to help employees recharge, decompress from stress and return to work feeling more productive and engaged; and </li> <li class="li1">Thriving in life and in work is a result of (amongst other things) continually developing our skills and capabilities. In continually learning.</li> </ol> <p class="p1">If we accept the above two points as fact, it makes sense that one wellness day every now and again is not enough. Companies should invest in scheduled, structured training days which seem to be essential for long-term team development, genuine behaviour change and sustainable workplace wellbeing.</p> <p class="p1">If a company is curious about what they will “get out of it,” here is a list of key benefits of employee training and how it can transform their workforce.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_142 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong>10 Key Benefits of Employee Training</strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_73"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Happy-business-team-at-corporate-training-team-building-activity-diverse-employees-group.-by-Jovanmandic-from-Getty-Images.jpg" alt="Happy business team at corporate training, team building activity, diverse employees group. by Jovanmandic from Getty Images" title="Happy business team at corporate training, team building activity, diverse employees group. by Jovanmandic from Getty Images" class="wp-image-235405" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_143 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><ol class="ol1"> <li class="li1"><strong>Increased performance </strong>– Knowledge changes fast. Continuous learning keeps teams sharp, confident and capable. Companies that invest in professional development see better results, productivity and innovation.</li> <p> </p> <li class="li1"><strong>A stronger workforce </strong>– Employees no longer stay just for the pay cheque. They stay where they can grow. Ongoing training helps attract, retain and inspire top talent.</li> <p> </p> <li class="li1"><strong>Fewer costly mistakes </strong>– Well-trained teams make fewer errors, saving time and money while improving safety, efficiency and overall quality.</li> <p> </p> <li class="li1"><strong>Alignment with company goals</strong> – Prioritising learning shows that growth and adaptability matter. It strengthens trust, loyalty and shared values across generations.</li> <p> </p> <li class="li1"><strong>Motivation and engagement </strong>– Learning fuels purpose and self-belief. When people feel challenged and supported, they’re more creative, energised and willing to take ownership.</li> <p> </p> <li class="li1"><strong>Knowledge sharing</strong> – Open access to training breaks down silos, encourages empathy and helps teams understand each other’s challenges and goals.</li> <p> </p> <li class="li1"><strong>More innovation</strong> – A culture of learning naturally sparks curiosity and experimentation. When people feel empowered, new ideas follow.</li> <p> </p> <li class="li1"><strong>Better processes</strong> – Skilled employees spend less time firefighting and more time improving systems, experiences and performance.</li> <p> </p> <li class="li1"><strong>A stronger brand </strong>– Investing in people builds reputation from the inside out. It positions your company as one that values growth, inclusion and excellence.</li> <p> </p> <li class="li1"><strong>Competitive edge</strong> – Training your people is cheaper and smarter than constantly hiring new ones. Cross-training builds flexibility, resilience and long-term success.</li> </ol></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_144 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p class="p1">With that, we have set out the benefits that ongoing training has for the individual as well as what scheduled, structured training days has for the company.</p> <p class="p1">A happier and more well-adjusted, confident employee and a company that has a staff contingent that is engaged, that shares knowledge freely amongst the different teams, that’s open to and welcomes innovation and that makes less errors.</p> <p class="p1">Of course, wellness days are good (don’t get us wrong), but ongoing training and development is better.</p> <p class="p1">It’s about investing in the assets of your company. Those assets are your employees and when it comes to investment, the employee/employer relationship is reciprocal. If employees feel that their company is investing in them, they will return that investment with excellent work and a positive culture. When employees have more than just access to training and knowledge, it will not only create a culture of learning that will help employees enjoy their work more, but it will also better equip them to manage unexpected events.</p> <p class="p1">So, from where we’re sitting – it’s an easy decision.</p> <p class="p2"><i>(Sources used and to whom we owe thanks – </i><a href="https://www.forbes.com/sites/tracybrower/2021/10/17/learning-is-a-sure-path-to-happiness-science-proves-it/?sh=8d93468768e3" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Forbes</i></span></a><i> and </i><a href="https://www.continu.com/blog/employee-training-benefits#:~:text=Discover%2520the%2520key%2520benefits%2520of,Training%2520From%2520the%2520Employee's%2520Perspective" target="_blank" rel="noopener"><span class="s1"><i>Continu</i></span></a><i>). </i></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_74"> <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/Revised-Corporate-Services-Brochure-2025.pdf" target="_blank"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="810" height="450" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/End-of-blog-post-CTA-image.jpg" alt="End of blog post CTA image (5)" title="End of blog post CTA image" class="wp-image-235400" /></span></a> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_divider et_pb_divider_7 et_pb_divider_position_bottom et_pb_space"><div class="et_pb_divider_internal"></div></div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_56 et_pb_gutters1"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_1_4 et_pb_column_91 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_75"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1080" height="1080" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Alicia-Koch-The-Legal-Belletrist.jpg" alt="" title="Alicia Koch - The Legal Belletrist" class="wp-image-1704" /></span> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_3_4 et_pb_column_92 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_145 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner">About the Author, <strong><em>Alicia Koch, Founder of The Legal Belletrist.</em></strong> Alicia, an admitted attorney with over 10 years PQE, and now a legal writer and researcher, has established The Legal Belletrist to assist companies (in different sectors) to write well-researched articles that speak to each company’s core business, enabling growth and commercialism.</p> <p>Click here to visit <a href="https://legalwhizz.wixsite.com/thelegalbelletrist">The Legal Belletrist website</a>. <strong>Email: <a href="mailto:alicia@thebelletrist.com" target="_blank" rel="noreferrer noopener">alicia@thebelletrist.com</a> </strong></div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/beyond-wellness-hours-why-teams-need-real-training-time/">Beyond Wellness Hours: Why Teams Need Real Training Time</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/beyond-wellness-hours-why-teams-need-real-training-time/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> <item> <title>Mirror, Mirror: Reflections on ageing (and laughing anyway)</title> <link>https://bravingboundaries.com/mirror-mirror-reflections-on-ageing/</link> <comments>https://bravingboundaries.com/mirror-mirror-reflections-on-ageing/#respond</comments> <dc:creator><![CDATA[friedaL2020]]></dc:creator> <pubDate>Tue, 07 Oct 2025 07:03:51 +0000</pubDate> <category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Procrastination]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-awareness]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-care]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Stress & Anxiety]]></category> <category><![CDATA[ageing]]></category> <category><![CDATA[body confidence]]></category> <category><![CDATA[confidence]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Embracing Change]]></category> <category><![CDATA[friendship]]></category> <category><![CDATA[invisibility]]></category> <category><![CDATA[middle age]]></category> <category><![CDATA[midlife]]></category> <category><![CDATA[mindset]]></category> <category><![CDATA[navigating midlife]]></category> <category><![CDATA[personal empowerment]]></category> <category><![CDATA[personal growth]]></category> <category><![CDATA[perspective]]></category> <category><![CDATA[redefining limit]]></category> <category><![CDATA[resilience]]></category> <category><![CDATA[Self-Acceptance]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-reflection]]></category> <category><![CDATA[self-talk]]></category> <category><![CDATA[women and ageing]]></category> <category><![CDATA[yoga]]></category> <guid isPermaLink="false">https://bravingboundaries.com/?p=235362</guid> <description><![CDATA[<p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mirror-mirror-reflections-on-ageing/">Mirror, Mirror: Reflections on ageing (and laughing anyway)</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></description> <content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="et_pb_section et_pb_section_9 et_section_regular" > <div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_57"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_93 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_146 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h5><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em>WRITTEN BY FRIEDA LEVYCKY, FOUNDER OF <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/" style="color: #be9727; text-decoration: underline;">BRAVING BOUNDARIES</a></span> </em></span></strong></h5> <p><strong><span style="color: #be9727;"><em></em></span></strong></p> <p><span>“<em>So, I’m old and weak?</em>” Fabulous! Well, that’s a good start to a Monday!</span></p> <p><span>My friends and I burst out laughing at girls’ night last week as I relayed the story of my yoga instructor helping me stretch further into a pigeon pose than I’d ever managed before. Post class, he gave me some feedback: “<em>Older women …</em>” he started, then quickly corrected himself: “<em>I mean, women who are more mature … need additional weight to progress into positions, as flexibility is just not enough as we get older. Your hips and shoulders are flexible, but weak</em>”. To be fair, his feedback was probably meant to be encouraging. I mean, I am (a bit) older now and I do have weak spots in my body, but all I heard was: <em>old and weak</em>.</span></p> <p><span>So, of course, I went home and did what any reasonable, totally well-balanced woman would do. I studied myself for a good ten minutes in front of the mirror. First my face then, for good measure, the rest of me too. Am I old? Is that how the world sees me now? Inside, I still feel like that flirty little nymph; the young lawyer who tottered around the office in very high heels and a dress. I’m the runner, the traveller, the yoga pretzel, the one who’s never been fussed about make-up. Ever since I was at school, I was always the youngest of the group (an August birthday has its perks). That’s still how I see myself, but is that really how the rest of the world sees me? Or have I quietly, without meaning to, stepped into this “<em>tannie</em>” role (as they say in South Africa)? Not properly old, not exactly young either, but that strange middle space of invisibility.</span></p> <p><span></span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_76"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/2.jpg" alt="ageing" title="who is that in the mirror?" class="wp-image-235368" /></span> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_147 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong><span>The Invisibility Cloak of Middle Age</span></strong></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_148 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p style="text-align: left;"><span>A friend of mine told me she knew she’d officially crossed the line when, at 50, the teenage checkout assistant asked if she’d like to use her pensioner discount. “<em>For f**k’s sake!</em>” she laughed, describing how she marched home, dumped the shopping and demanded of her husband and friend: “<em>Do I look like a pensioner?</em>”. There really was only one correct answer to that question and, fortunately, both men were wise enough to choose it.</span></p> <p>Another friend recalled standing in a wine bar bathroom next to a gaggle of 20-somethings on a hen party and catching her reflection beside theirs. The contrast was sobering. Others have shared those silly, but defining, moments when you realise you’ve officially lost track of what “<em>Whip/Nae Nae</em>” is (yes, I did need to look up the spelling for that as I did originally write “<em>Nay Nay</em>”), let alone how to dance to it.</p> <p>To be fair, I can still give them a run for their money if Whigfield or Steps comes on the radio. I’ve always nailed “<em>Saturday Night</em>” and “<em>Tragedy</em>.”<span style="font-weight: 400;"></span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_149 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong><span>The Double-Edged Sword of Invisibility</span></strong></h2> <h2></h2></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_150 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span style="font-weight: 400;">There’s a strange freedom in becoming invisible though. Fewer eyes watching, fewer judgements, fewer comparisons. However, it can also be lonely. You start to notice the subtle ways the world stops looking your way: the compliments fade, the flirtatious glances vanish and shop assistants suddenly call you “<em>Ma’am</em>”.</span></p></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_58"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_94 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_77"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/3.jpg" alt="Becoming invisible" title="Becoming invisible" class="wp-image-235369" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_59"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_95 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_151 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span>I used to be judgmental about women who turned to Botox or surgery. I’d make sweeping statements about “<em>ageing gracefully</em>” and “<em>accepting yourself</em>”, but as I inch closer to that stage, I can feel myself softening. I understand now that it’s not always about vanity. Sometimes it’s about visibility. About wanting to feel seen again in a world that treats women’s ageing as something to hide.</span></p> <p>There’s something to be said for doing what makes you feel good in your own skin. Whether that’s fillers or face yoga, Spanx or squats. Seriously, who am I to judge? If it lifts your spirits, then that’s what matters.</p> <p>Clearly, I’ve been talking about ageing a lot because Instagram’s now decided that I’m obsessed. My feed has been flooded with clips from <a href="https://www.instagram.com/reel/DPWk_OAETkK/">Paris Fashion Week</a>: a stunning parade of ageless icons like Helen Mirren, Heidi Klum, Jane Fonda, Gillian Anderson, Iris Berben, Andie MacDowell and Philippine Leroy-Beaulieu drifting effortlessly down the runway, and snippets of Patricia Routledge’s <a href="https://selfdiscoverywisdom.com/2025/08/08/a-poem-by-patricia-routledge/">Letter to Life</a> which she wrote for her 95th birthday. Alongside them, the quote that keeps popping up: “<em>Too young, too old, too bold. Whatever you do, someone will always judge your choices</em>”. How accurate that statement is.</p> <p>It’s almost as if the universe (or the algorithm) is forcing me to re-check my thinking. Some of those women have chosen the surgical route; others have aged naturally and all of them looked magnificent. There really isn’t a single right way to do this ageing thing.</p> <p> </p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_152 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong><span>Old Bird, Strong Body</span></strong></h2></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_60"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_96 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_153 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p><span>This past week, after all the “old and weak” jokes, I went back to yoga and did a Bikram class. I’ve trained on and off in Bikram for 15 years (I even took my teaching qualifications back in 2017), but this was my first class in months. For anyone who’s ever sweated through those 26 poses in 40 degrees, you’ll know: no class is ever the same. Yet, that class was one of the magical ones; one where everything clicks. My bow-pulling pose was strong, my balance steady and I felt incredible.</p> <p>At the end, a gorgeous, blonde twenty-something bounced over to me and said: “<em>Wow! How long have you been practising? I hope one day I can be just like you</em>”. Now, if that doesn’t make an “old bird” smile, I don’t know what will.</span></p> <p><span></span></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_78"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/4.jpg" alt="yoga" title="yoga" class="wp-image-235370" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_61"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_97 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_154 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><h2><strong><span>Rewriting the Narrative</span></strong></h2></div> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_62"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_98 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_155 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p>The reality is that I’m new to this ageing thing. I don’t have all the answers and I know damn well that the only way to get them is to walk through this period of my life. What I have started to realise though is that I’ve been joking a lot about ageing lately. I’ve been laughing it off, making quips about “<em>feeling</em> <em>ancient</em>”, but … I’ve also started to notice it (that feeling of being old) and, if I’m not careful, I’ll end up believing my own words too. Negative self-talk rewires the brain and I’m not ready to programme mine to think I’m old and weak.</p> <p>So, I’m changing the script. I’ve set myself a new mantra to stop the negative seeping in:</p> <p><em>“I’m healthy, happy and still a little bit fabulous. This body has seen things, done things, climbed mountains, danced in heels and still gets me through yoga. She’s not old or weak. She’s strong and full of life.”</em></p> <p><em></em></p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_79"> <span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="2000" height="1500" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/5.jpg" alt="my new ageing mantra" title="my new ageing mantra" class="wp-image-235371" /></span> </div> </div> </div><div class="et_pb_row et_pb_row_63"> <div class="et_pb_column et_pb_column_4_4 et_pb_column_99 et_pb_css_mix_blend_mode_passthrough et-last-child"> <div class="et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_156 et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light"> <div class="et_pb_text_inner"><p>Ageing is a privilege, one that’s easily forgotten until you realise that not everyone is given that gift.</p> <p>So, here’s to all the “<em>old birds</em>” out there, laughing our way through yoga classes, mirror reflections and checkout discounts. May we never forget: <strong><em>we are anything but invisible</em></strong>.</p></div> </div><div class="et_pb_module et_pb_image et_pb_image_80"> <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/book-a-call/"><span class="et_pb_image_wrap "><img decoding="async" src="https://bravingboundaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/End-of-blog-post-CTA-image.jpg.webp" alt="" title="" /></span></a> </div> </div> </div> </div> <p>The post <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com/mirror-mirror-reflections-on-ageing/">Mirror, Mirror: Reflections on ageing (and laughing anyway)</a> appeared first on <a href="https://bravingboundaries.com">Braving Boundaries</a>.</p> ]]></content:encoded> <wfw:commentRss>https://bravingboundaries.com/mirror-mirror-reflections-on-ageing/feed/</wfw:commentRss> <slash:comments>0</slash:comments> </item> </channel> </rss>